"Mommy?" Katara turned to face her oldest and so far only child, seven-year-old Trong.
"Yes dear, what is it?" Trong squirmed and twisted his hands behind his back in a nervous way. Katara scrutinized him looking behind him for broken dishes, mud or –spirits forbid- Momo forced inside the barrel that served as their clothing washer and left to die. She focused in on his hand. There was something plastic.
"Hand it over." Katara held out an open palm to emphasis her point. Trong gave her a high five with his fist and a sheepish grin. He quickly withdrew his hand so she could not reach whatever he was hesitant to share.
Katara called out the window to her husband, "Could you come in here?" A look of horror passed over Trong's face. Mommy was calling in back up and he had no hope against her secret weapon- the Avatar!
In walked Aang. He ducked under the doorway to get inside and took two long strides to end up standing next to his wife.
Aang pecked her on the cheek. "Yes dear?" His voice was definitely deeper than 7 years ago and he finally towered over Katara.
"Our son," she looked at Trong until he squirmed with displeasure, "seems to be hiding something."
"Oh really? Hand it over." Like his wife before him, Aang held out an open, upturned hand. Trong tried to high five him like he had done to Katara but Aang caught his hand.
He pried the fisted hand open and pulled out the plastic Katara had spied.
"Oh. My. God." Sitting in Trong's hand was a Trojan condom.
"Yeah I was gonna ask you about this but it's lu-lubruh-lubricated?" he stumbled over the word lubricated, "So it got stuck to my hand! What is it anyways? By the way, what's a Trojan? Uncle Sokka was waving this around and yelling 'TROJAN! SUKI I DON'T USE TROJANS! WHO IS HE?' He made Aunt Suki pack her things and leave." He looked innocently at his horrified parents. That innocence soon to be tainted.
Katara and Aang looked at each other silently and played three rounds of rock-paper-scissor. Fortunately, Katara won two to three.
With a proud, teasing grin she said, "Well you heard his question. You're the dad, now answer it."
"I'd rather face the Fire lord again…" Aang muttered. People depending on him for little things like saving the world but condoms! Not talking about condoms with his child!
"Speak up Aang! If I can't hear you Trong probably can't either!" Katara loved having a little boy. He was so innocent he didn't even notice when she was flirt fighting –or coming on to- Aang. Sadly, Aang had difficulty noticing too.
"Katara I was just thinking about OUR first experience with condoms."
Katara blushed scarlet and covered her face. Aang's face split into a vengeful smirk.
"Let's take a trip down memory road." Katara shook her head violently, her eyes wide.
"Daddy there's only one road in the village and it's not Memory Road!"
"Well we need to go down Memory road right now. It's figurative language besides this is a pretty funny story Trong."
"Tell us! 'Cause I love stories and you can tell me what this is!" He brandished another condom he had found as if it was a new toy. Katara turned an even brighter red.
"If you insist…" There was fade out music and the screen began to waver.
Katara giggled louder. Aang made a shushing sound. They may be married but Sokka seemed to expect Katara to be a 120-year-old virgin. Ninety-eight years is a long time to wait so once more, they were sneaking around. It was like they were teenagers again- still traveling on Appa and having adventures. Only now, they were hiding from her brother instead of the Fire nation and every major army and they were having sex instead of saving the world.
"Aang we should be careful," Katara whispered. The walls in this place were paper-thin. Thankfully, Toph had found a new home or she would have been in agony every night from hearing every single little creak of the mattress, moans, and creepy sex noises. And the vibrations creating images for her! She was better off living with her meek, hen pecked husband the Boulder now officially known as "Toph's woman or "The Pebble.'"
"Sokka's talking to the moon. He won't bother us."
"I don't kno-
A loud bang sounded and the bedroom door crashedl to the ground. Moonlight rushed in and blinded Katara and Aang who had grow used to the darkness.
"AAHHHHH!!!" Katara covered herself with the blanket and glared angrily at the shadowed figure in the door. Couldn't this wait?Aang was just getting to the good part.
"Sookkkaaaaa!!" Aang screamed. He was pissed! Katara was just getting to the good part.
Sokka looked intensely at Aang his eyes never moving from his face. After all, he did not want to see his brother-in-law's naked body and it was good for intimidation and suspense. He slowly walked into the room.
"Sokka get out; we're busy, "Katara yelled. She was still upset over Aang getting to the good part and being naked in front of her brother. He didn't even justify her with a glance; he just stood in front of Aang.
Then he reached into his pocket.
"Aang run! Sokka's got a weapon!!!" Sokka pulled out a condom and handed it to Aang.
"Trojan," he said, "the pleasure you want, the protection you trust." He propped the door on its frame and left the room.
"I'm sorry you had to see that Princess Yue," seeped under the door from the hallway. There was a pause as if an actual conversation was taking place.
"I know it scared me too."
His footsteps echoed down the hallways as he comforted the moonlight. Katara stared at the door in shock as if it was the reason Sokka decided to talk to his dead lover moon goddess or why he had wanted to enter a rather "loving" couple's bedroom at night.
Aang stared at the small plastic package in disgust and shock. His face twisted into a mix of rage and indignant surprise.
"Hey! This is a small! Sokka!!!"
"T-Trojan? Small? Pleasure? Naked?" The small child's eyes rolled into the back of his head and he hit the floor. Katara sighed and covered her face. She rubbed her temples in a semicircle, clearly saying with her body language "shit does he need therapy now?"
While it looked like she was greatly upset in reality, she was trying to stop the giggles. She had forgotten about the condom being a small and it made her remember him standing in the middle of the village –naked and late at night- fire-bending it to ashes.
Aang felt horrible; his wife was upset and he'd killed his only son! Oh never mind he was breathing…well his wife was still covering her face. He'd start with her and then move onto finding a therapist for Trong.
"Honey," Aang began slowly so he wouldn't get hurt, "Maybe we should have told him it was a war fought by the Troy."
"You're right Aang. You should have told him it was a war." Katara heaved a sigh and leaned into Aang. He put his arms around her.
"Well, Katara," Aang began in a comforting manner, "he's our first child. We're still learning." Katara gave a small smile.
"You're right. You ARE making mistakes. My father did the same when mom died. I mean look at Sokka!" Aang almost laughed before he realized how serious Katara was.
"Yeah. Just like Sokka….." He looked with fear at his son's unconscious body.
"Just like Sokka…."
TMATMA TMATMA TMATMA TMATMA TMATMA TMATMA TMATMA TMATMA TMATMA TMATMA TMATMA TMATMA TMATMA TMATMA
As the first child, I can say with confidence that parents always make their mistakes on the first baby. But look at me I'm perfectly normal! -Head twists 360 degrees with a sick grin on face.-
Once again inspired by my friend Aangsfangirl1214. We have weird conversations.
Please review! Stephanie will encourage you to in her stories too anyways. '
Ever perky,
TMA
