Hello there again gentle-readers. Here it is, the debut of Ice Age 4: Come What May. I would like to give recognition to the suggested names. They are 'Ice Age: A Twist in the Drift, Ice Age: Continental Shift, Ice Age: Louis afloat, Mammoth Rhapsody, Louis Afloat, and Ice Age Continental Drift: A Change of the Tides. The title comes from Shakespeare's "Macbeth" and it means whatever event comes up some to pass. This line went on to be a song written by David Baerwald. It was originally supposed to be featured in the film "Romeo + Juliet" but was later pulled. It was later featured in the 2001 juke-box musical "Moulin Rouge". I find that the lyrics match this story. Before I get on with the story I would like to thank Tabbypie101. TabbyPie helped me out and gave me a good plot point and you should all check out her works. Because I'm in a good mood, all my minions get will get supper today. However, for every person that reads and does not review, that is a bottle of bleach in their food. Anywho, here we go.
I don't own Ice Age or its characters. I own Louis's family, so back off 20th Century Fox better back off.
Listen to my heart, can you hear it sing
Come back to me and forgive everything
Seasons may change winter to spring
But I love you until the end of time
Come what may, come what may
I will love you until my dying day
"Come What May"
By
David Baerwald
If someone were to ask young Louis Swine what his plans were for the day, cataclysmic destruction and mass panic would not even be close to the top of the list. If this was a normal day he would probably say, "Hang out with Peaches" or even as far as "Tell her how you feel you stupid, stupid molehog". Heck if he was following his mother's plans it would be, in her own words, "Go find a girl and give me some grand-hogs. Despite what I say every year on my birthday, I'm not twenty-nine" But it wasn't his mom's day. It certainly wasn't an ordinary day. Today was the day the world changed for the beasts of North America.
It all began as it did everyday. Louis arose from a trance of deep slumber promptly at six in the morning. It was a habit he gained from his young hoggling days when he would force himself awake to dig out whatever distance he had set out to complete that year. To him it was as natural as breathing. Eventually this became obsolete as his mother began to slowly adopt a laissez-faire approach instead of her domineering and overprotective demeanor, but the habit always stayed.
Louis's eyes slowly opened. Using his elbows he perched himself up and a yawn worked his way out of his throat. His rising at such an early hour may have been clockwork, but it wasn't always easy. Most of the time it was a giant pain. No, scratch that. It was tiring. Most of the time he would ignore the subliminal alarm clock and sleep in until the sun was high enough to warm up the ground he called home.
Despite how good it sounded, Louis forced himself to stay awake. Using his wrist he wiped whatever sleep was left from his eyes and stood up. Next he took a few staggering steps to a small bowl of water that he used as a mirror. Looking down at the liquid, he tried to get himself to look presentable. He ruffled his hair and brushed a banana peel that was part of last night's snack off of his shoulder. For a moment he just stared at his reflection. He cocked his head to the side before exhaling loudly. His arms moved up in an upward motion and stopped at a ninety degree angle. He was flexing.
A large smile spread across his face. He did look bigger. For the past several weeks he had been working out. Throughout the night he lifted rocks, did push-ups, sit-ups, pull-ups, anything he could think of. He wanted to be stronger. He may have wanted to impress a certain girl, but that was only a side effect. The real reason he was doing this was because he wanted to protect her, this girl. That's what you're supposed to protect isn't it, your precious people?
"Ah-hem".
Louis's eyes widened. He knew that sound by heart. His arms lowered, and he turned sharply and gave a sheepish grin.
"Hey Mom."
Mrs. Fran Swine did not look like most mothers. She had big hair that added almost a foot to her height and had dark red lips. Her body shape made her look like a pair and she always wore a string of white sea shells around her neck. The most notable thing about her you couldn't see. It was her voice. It was very nasal and because of that her laugh was very distinctive (AN: Man I hate it when authors do it. Totally disrupt the plot. I was supposed to be doing something… oh yeah! This is the part where I tell you that Mrs. Swine is voiced by Fran Drescher. Suffer.)
Mrs. Swine shook her head. "Oh, huh-neeeee," she said as she put a hand on her chest, "I hate to tell you this, but that good looking guy in the bowl could nev-ah be interested in you."
She went up to him squinted her eyes a bit. Her hands went forward and began an attempt to tame his hair. One hand continued the act while the other tried to wipe the dirt of his body.
"Oy vey. Look at you! Please tell me you're gonna fix yourself up before going to the surface."
Now Louis raised a brow at his mother. What was she getting on about?
"What's wrong with the way I look now?"
Mrs. Swine went to the corner of the burrow where she kept her various "tools" of beauty. She rummaged through the large pile before pulling out a long green stem with an abundance of thorns on one side. Louis's eyes widened and he took a couple steps back.
"Mom, what's that for?"
His mother ignored him. She kept moving towards him while gently poking the thorns. Whether she was making sure they were not too sharp or if they were not too dull, he didn't know.
"Well for starters your hair makes you look like porcupine," she then proceeded to use the stem as a comb and ran the thorns lightly through her son's hair. She then parted it down the middle and had it fall over his ears. Mrs. Swine smiled at her handy work before it suddenly shifted back to its messy self. She shook her head and sighed. "Well we could at least try and get some of this dirt off you."
Louis crossed his arms and said, "We? And what do you mean this dirt?"
His mother put her hands out and started to brush his fur, making small clouds of loose dirt fill the air. "You're filthy. You need a bath. You know what, that's what I'm gonna do. I'll get you some water and you can…"
Louis sighed. While his mother may have become less overprotective, but she became way to over baring. He knew she meant well, he really did, but sometimes it was too much. It was like for the first half of his life she wanted him to stay a baby, but now she wanted him to grow into an old man. Maybe she was crazy. He knew Miss Ellie wasn't like this. Were other mother's like it?
"Mom," Louis said, interrupting her long speech on what he should do to be clean. "Think about this logically. We are molehogs. We live in the dirt. We are covered in dirt."
She waved a hand at him. "Logic Shmogic. Sweetie, you just turned seventeen. You're almost grown. Soon you'll have your own burrow. Now if this girl you're so stuck on would just notice you, then you can get hitched, have those two-point-five kids-,"
"Wait," Louis held his hands out, telling her to stop. He felt his cheeks begin to warm up slightly. He then said, "What girl? There's no girl? Why would you think there was a girl?"
Mrs. Swine smirked. "Oh come on. It's obvious. Don't think I haven't noticed those work out sessions of yours. I swear, you need to bathe afterwards. The schtook you have coming off you… anyway, I noticed that you actually look in your reflection. You're caring more about your appearance, and you said those last three sentences in eight seconds. Your already old enough to procreate, better sooner then later as I say-,"
"Mom!" Louis's face felt like it was on fire and he was pretty sure it was now as red as a pepper. "That's… not right! I'm seventeen! Peaches is eighteen! We're too young to do… that!"
Mrs. Swine put her hand on her chest and sighed dramatically. "Wow, I guess this logic thing you're using really does work, huh?"
Obviously, Louis thought. Finally his mother saw sense.
"You know," she continued, "Maybe I should try it out. Hmm… oh! How about this. I never said it was Peaches."
She put her hands on her hips and smiled triumphantly at her son's horrified face. It took everything she had not to laugh when he backed away slowly and then turned to leave the burrow without a word. As soon as he was gone from her sight she burst out into her signature laugh. Tears came to her eyes and with one finger she wiped them from her eyes. Then she smiled. She smiled at what she saw.
"He's hopeless." Her smile grew wider. "Just like his father."
Peaches eyed her family warily as they slept. Today was the day she had been preparing herself for. All those moments of self given pep talks and practicing conversations was finally going to pay off. Today was the day she was going to make her fantasy become a reality.
She was going to talk to Ethan.
From the day she first saw him all those months ago, he had plagued her mind. There was not a day that passed where her thoughts drifted to him. The way his messt tuff of blonde hair would move even when he would stand perfectly still, or how blue his eyes looked whenever he laughed made her heart beat a mile a minute. He was so… wow! All she could think was wow!
Peaches admitted that she may have been a little obsessive. The topic from thereafter was one thing: Ethan. Whenever she was around Louis, she poured her heart. It was always about how good-looking Ethan was, or how strong he was when he moved that rotting tree, or even how sensitive he was when talking to others. This went on for weeks. Peaches was sure that this was as far as she would get on her crush. But then Louis told her something that changed her.
"Peaches," Louis had told her as he put his hand on her trunk, "Don't you think that you shouldn't focus on talking about a guy? What about a guy that's easy to talk to and who really knows you? Wouldn't that be better?"
Like always, Louis was right. There was no way she could just go on talking to her best friend like some raging fangirl. What Louis said made sense. Instead of talking about Ethan, she would talk to Ethan and really get to know him.
She looked at her family and began to tap her foot impatiently. They would be up any minute and her plan would fail then. Her father had told her time and time again not to go to the falls. He said it was a dangerous place where all the no good delinquents went. In reality it was just where all the other teenagers went to have fun. In her dad's mind, any teenager that wasn't her or Louis were delinquents.
Speaking of Louis, where was he? He was never late! If he didn't get here in time, then she'd have to abort her plans. As much as she told her dad that she was independent and old enough to do things on her own, she found it hard to do anything stressful without Louis.
Peaches felt something suddenly grab her shoulder. She jumped and spun around just in time to see Louis duck in an attempt to dodge her swinging trunk. He succeeded and put a finger over his lips.
"Shhh!," he whispered, "Peaches, I thought you said we were supposed to be careful."
Peaches gave him a slight look. "You're late."
Louis got a sheepish look on his face and rubbed the back of his head. "Yeah, sorry about that. I got caught in a conversation with my mom. You know how that goes."
Peaches couldn't suppress a giggle. Just as she was friends with Louis, her mother was friends with Mrs. Swine. Something everyone knew was that Mrs. Swine liked to talk. She didn't need to be the only one talking, but she just loved conversations. She and Louis would always joke about it, saying that if the entire world lost its voice, then she would invent a language where you talk with your hands.
"In that case, you're forgiven," she said, faking a stern voice.
Louis decided to play along and put on an act of gratitude. "Oh thank you so much!" he said dramatically, "I wouldn't dream of angering Peaches, the Great and Terrible."
Peaches went and gave him a playful punch on his shoulder.
"Hey."
Both of them turned to see Peaches opossum uncle, Eddie glaring at him from his usual sleeping spot: next to his brother and on the lowest branch.
"If you guys are gonna sneak out, then do it quietly. I'm a sleepin'."
Both Louis and Peaches nodded. Eddie turned away and with a yawn tried to drift back to dream land. After that they quietly tip toed away from the herd.
"You were right Frannie," Ellie said as she lifted a blackberry and popped it in her mouth, "You were right."
Ellie and Fran were sitting in a large clearing. Several others of all different species were around doing there own thing with their own friends, stuck in their own hussle and bussle worlds. At the moment, Ellie and Fran were sitting in their usual spots. There were two nearby tree stumps with a large puck shaped stone in the middle. On the stone they had piles of food so they could snack as they talked. For Ellie it was a large amount of berries and fruits. For Fran it was crunchy insects and juicy crawlers.
"I'm telling you El, it's a shame." Fran eyed her stash but continued. "Seriously what is wrong with my son?"
Ellie snorted. "What's wrong with teenagers in general?"
Fran moved her finger like a metronome. "Careful there. You wouldn't want Manny to think you actually agreed with him on something."
Fran wasn't that big on Manny. To be frank he couldn't stand her. They were always clashing and whenever they held different opinions insults were sure to fly.
Ellie shook her head. "No, Manny always assumes the worst. His philosophy nowadays is if it has teen at end of its age, then its trouble."
"Really? Wow, I thought his motto was if it has a taste then take a bite."
Ellie ignored her and went on. "Me, I like to think that they all have there flaws."
"They do," Fran grabbed a caterpillar and slurped it up. "Mine's got obvious, yours has oblivious."
They both let out bays of laughter that caused a few people to turn their heads. Fran took another caterpillar and popped it into her mouth. "I'm telling you, Louis get's it from Charles, may he rest in peace. It took that man a year to talk to me, half of that to ask me out, and then three years later to ask me to marry him."
Ellie's brows jolted up. "Was he at least subtle?"
"That man? Subtle? Please! His first words were Wow! You're pretty! He said more, but it was covered by that stutter and a deep shade of blush. Yes, he was the master of subtlety."
Ellie nodded, but after a moment shook her head. "Peaches didn't get hers from me or Manny. It was all Sid."
As they continued their chatter, Peaches and Manny entered the clearing from the western forest path. Immediately, a few of the more observant animals steered clear and away from the two. It was easy to see that they were both angry beyond belief. Even if you were blind you could still feel the negative energy radiating from them as if it was a thick cloud of smoke.
Peaches saw her mother and Mrs. Swine across the way and started to walk to them without looking back at her father.
"Peaches," Manny called after his daughter in his stern voice. "Don't walk away from me young lady!"
She didn't look back when she said, "Why? Are you going to forbid me from seeing my mother too?"
"I don't want you to go to those falls alone. You should know how other teenagers are."
Peaches snorted and rolled her eyes. "Yes, other teenagers. Normal teenagers. Something apparently you don't want me to be. And besides, I wasn't alone. Louis was with me."
Now she heard him snort. "He barely counts as a man. He's a wiener."
Her mind went back to only a couple of minutes earlier where her father had basically said the same thing, but to Louis himself.
Yes, that is my place. And… you put me there.
His tone and the way his body language seemed to become downcast was apparent. And then when her dad practically dragged her away his eyes spoke of how much that comment hurt him.
This time she did turn around to him and shot him a glare that would make her Uncle Diego proud. "Don't call him that," she said, "It hurts his feelings!"
Again Manny snorted. "That's why he's a wiener. That's why I let you talk to him."
Manny increased the distance of his stride and either didn't notice or simply ignored the new glare she sent him. She followed him to where the two older women sat.
"Okay, two things," she said, "One, when are you going to show Louis some respect. Two, when can I talk to other boys?"
"Easy," Manny said, "When I'm dead. Plus three days, to make sure I'm dead."
Peaches shook her head. When she was close enough she greeted the two women. "Hey Mom, hey Ms. Frannie."
"Hey oblivious."
When she didn't notice the nickname they both exchanged looks. It was then they saw a large log heading for them.
"Hit the floor!"
Well that is all I have for chapter 1. I hoped you enjoyed it. I would like to remind you all that I am new to this sight and therefore might not be to par with the other writers here. I'll find my flow eventually. If you have any suggestions then please feel free to say it. Criticism is welcome as well.
Until the next time.
