"Papa, tell us about your adventures in the alternate Oziverses!" pleaded Herbert and George, Mr. Wogglebug's six year old twin woggle-beetle sons.
"I've been to versions of Oz in which there was no color, and ones where no one could talk, and also ones where no one spoke English, and there was one where everyone looked and talked and acted funny including my own counterpart, and I've even been to one in which I and everyone I knew was a warrior."
"Wow! Could you tell us your favorite ones?" begged George. "Please, Papa, please?"
"Okay, settle down you two," Mr. Wogglebug chuckled. "I'll tell you about my first trip through the Oziverse. It all started when the Wizard discovered how dimension time travel was possible and Ozma signed a proclamation allowing me the honor of being her Royal Adventurer through time and space. Then after the Wizard taught me all I needed to know about traveling between dimensions I stepped into the transporter."
I found myself standing in the middle of a familiar looking landscape. There was a road paved with yellow bricks beside me surrounded by grass and trees, and I could see a tall structure up ahead which looked a lot like the Emerald City I knew. Then I noticed three figures come out of it and walk toward me. As they got closer I saw they resembled the Scarecrow, Tin Woodman, and Cowardly Lion, if a bit shorter perhaps.
Realizing they wouldn't know me in this universe as I probably already knew them I approached them and took off my hat and made a very polite bow as I said:
"Good morning one and all! My name is H. M. Wogglebug T.E.. Where are you three going, and why do you have such glum faces?"
"I wanted the Wizard of Oz to give me a brain," said the Scarecrow sadly.
"And I wanted him to give me a heart," the Tin Woodman wailed.
"And I wanted him to give me courage," the Lion sighed.
"But he won't give them to us until destroy the Wicked Witch of the West and we rescue our friend Dorothy," the Scarecrow explained.
"She was just kidnapped by the Winged Monkeys," the Lon said with a shudder.
"Now she is probably locked up in the Wicked Witch of the West's castle!" the Tin Woodman exclaimed on the verge of tears.
"What a very unfortunate predicament you are all in!" I said. "Please let me come with you to the Witch's castle to rescue you're friend."
"Thank you so much," exclaimed the Tin Woodman.
"You're not afraid?" asked the Lion quivering.
"I am thoroughly educated, my friend," I replied. "So I know when to be afraid and when not to be."
"The Wizard gave us this medallion which will unlock the Witch's chamber," said the Scarecrow as he showed me a giant sized medallion with a big emerald in the center surrounded by nine holes. "There are nine jewels missing from it, they are scattered across the three corners of the Land of Oz."
"Then we must find them," I said.
We had barely started out when we came to a signpost in the middle of the road with pictures on it which point to the Land of the Winkies, the Country of the Quadlings, and the City of the Munchkins.
"Which way should we go?" asked the Tin Woodman.
I studied the signpost for a moment and then said, "The City of the Munchkins, since it seemes the closest and the shortest route."
We set off in the Easterly direction and soon we came to a giant poppy field.
"Look at all those beautiful poppies!" exclaimed the Tin Woodman.
"There must be thousands!" added the Scarecrow.
"I bet the smell great, too," added the Lion. He walked up to them and sniffed. "Yeah... they smell..." He slowly fell over and laid down amongst the flowers, fast asleep.
"Lion, this is no time for a rest!" exclaimed the Tin Woodman.
"Oh no!" gasped the Scarecrow. "They must be sleeping poppies!"
"How do we wake him up!" asked the Tin Woodman, much worried.
"I think I know what to do," I said. I reached into my special green suitcase which I always carried when I traveled and took out a magic bubble blower.
"Lion's are very ticklish, you know," I said. I walked up to the sleeping Lion and blew some bubbles against his backside which made him giggle.
"I can't stand being tickled!" The Lion exclaimed as he suddenly became wide awake.
"You did it!" exclaimed the Scarecrow in relief.
"Way to go!" added the Tin Woodman happily.
"Come on, remember Dorothy needs us!" said the Scarecrow seriously.
We crossed the Poppy field and found a humming bird which led us into the City of the Munchkins where we saw everything was blue.
"Hello my friends! Welcome to Munchkin Village!" exclaimed a short stout gentleman who seemed to be the mayor.
"Look at what's around the mayor's neck! It's a jewel!" exclaimed the Scarecrow.
We approached the Mayor and pointed to the shining sapphire that was hanging from a chain around his neck.
The Munchkin Mayor looked down at his blue pendant and chuckled knowingly. "I know what you're after! Well, I'll do a deal with you. I'll let you have my jewel if you fix our water fountain."
We readily agreed to his deal and he showed us a large blue water fountain at the top of which were weather vanes in the shape of a cardinal, a frog, a giraffe, a fly, and a fish, all of which were pointing in different directions.
"It's a mystery how exactly it works, but the water only seems to flow when each of the weather vanes are pointing in the same direction, and the wind is always messing them up."
So we carefully pointed all the weather vanes in the right direction and the water began flowing freely from the fountain, much to the Mayor's delight.
"You've done it! There she flows! In honor of fixing our fountain, and with our heartfelt thanks, please except this jewel!" He took off the jewel he was wearing around his neck and handed it to us.
"A beautiful blue jewel!" exclaimed the Tin Woodman in admiration.
"Our first one!" we all said in unison.
We added the jewel to the medallion and then we walked further into the village where we came up to a plump Munchkin woman wearing blue munchkin clothing and a peaked hat. She had a very dazed and confused expression on her face as we approached.
"Excuse us, but have you seen any blue jewels around?" I asked.
"You're looking for a jewel? Well, I'd love to help you, sweetie. But that wicked... whatchmacallim... has stolen my memory, I can't even remember my own name. But they do say a special fruit juice cocktail can bring your memory back. You get the fruit and make the juice and I'll see if I can remember where a jewel is hidden.
We agreed to her deal and went to the fruit orchard where we selected some apples, oranges, and pears. Then we mixed them up together in a blending machine.
"Do I need this!" she exclaimed gratefully as we handed her a glassful of the fruit juice. She swallowed it three quick slurps, and then she seemed to be getting her memory back. "Oh! I seemed to remember something about a tree! It's all fuzzy! I'm gonna need another one of this fruit juice drinks!"
So we mixed up another blend of the juice and gave it to her.
"Bottoms up!" she said and drank it all once again in three big slurps. "It's nearly there! I can see feathers!" she exclaimed. "One more drink and I'll remember where the jewel is!"
So we quickly mixed up another blend of the fruity drink and handed her another glass.
"Mud in your eye!" she exclaimed as she downed the last glass. "Oh yes! I've got it! The jewel is hidden in a parrot's nest! Go back to the orchard and you're sure to find it!"
So we went back to the orchard, and sure enough we found another blue jewel nestled in a parrot's nest.
"Yay! Our second jewel!" we all said in unison.
We left the fruit orchard and soon came upon a garden in front of a farmhouse where we spotted a fuzzy little gopher clutching a blue jewel.
"Look! That gopher has a jewel!" exclaimed the Tin Woodman.
As soon as he had spoken the gopher jumped into a hole he had dug in the ground and took the jewel with him.
I looked at the flowers closely, and then suddenly realized what kind they were. "These are whirly flowers! If we finish planting them they'll fly up into the air, and we'll see where the gopher has that jewel. But pay attention because the flowers are very choosy about where they go."
So we planted red flowers, which could only grow next to blue flowers, and we planted yellow flowers which could only grow next to blue flowers, and we planted blue flowers which could only grow next to yellow flowers. And when we were done, all of the flowers whirled up and out of their places in the ground and flew into the sky.
"We did it! Another blue jewel!" exclaimed the Tin Woodman happily as he picked up the jewel and added it to the medallion.
"Three down, and six to go!" I said. "We must have found all can here, so let's seek elsewhere."
So we left the City of the Munchkins and soon we came to the same poppy field as before.
"Just one quick sniff!" said the Lion, and before we could stop him he had sniffed the poppies again and fallen fast asleep.
"Lion how could you?" the Tin Woodman scolded the sleeping Lion.
"You'd think he'd have learned by now!" added the Scarecrow in exasperation.
"Wake up, Lion! Please wake up!" begged the Tin Woodman to no avail.
So I reached into my special green suitcase again and this time I took out a magic feather duster and I tickled the Lion until he woke up again.
"Well done!" exclaimed the Tin Woodman. "Now, come one! Remember Dorothy is waiting!"
"Can't I ever have a good sleep?" the Lion moaned
We came once again to the signpost with pictures pointing in three different directions. This time we went Southward to the Country of the Quadlings.
"Come on, Lion! You're lagging behind!" the Scarecrow called to the Lion as we walked down a path lined with shrubs.
We approached a tree with wooden steps leading up to it. "I wonder what is at the top of that tree?" said the Tin Woodman.
"What strange looking flowers?" the Scarecrow observed the flowers beside us which looked like they had eyes and noses and mouths.
"Do they bite?" asked the Lion fearfully.
Just then one of the flowers sprang up and snapped at a fly that was buzzing around it and apparently devoured it. This so frightened the Lion that he quickly scrambled up the steps of the tall tree on all fours. We quickly followed after him. It was a long way up, and when we finally reached the top we saw a big yellow castle in the distance.
"Oh look! The Castle of the Wicked Witch of the West! Right in the middle of the Land of the Winkies!" exclaimed the Scarecrow pointing straight ahead.
"And that is where Dorothy is being held prisoner!" the Tin Woodman said mournfully.
"I wonder if we can see her through this telescope," wondered the Scarecrow.
We all looked through it and sure enough we saw the face of a little girl of about eight years old with brown pigtails and freckles. She was in the highest tower of the castle and surrounded by long metal bars. Her face wore a very worried expression.
"Look! There's Dorothy!" wailed the Tin Woodman ready to cry.
I shivered slightly. "I say, it's quite cold up here, isn't it? Let's go back down."
So we went back down the way we came. We left the tree and we came upon a high hill with a rope ladder leading upward.
"There's only one way to find out what's up there!" declared the Scarecrow.
So we climbed the rope ladder and it led us up to a most beautiful forest clearing with large thick trees with huge shiny leaves, and a pond was nearby with colored toadstools beside it, and in the background there were some colored water pipes.
"This must be the Quadling grotto!" exclaimed the Lion.
"There's bound to some jewels around here!" declared the Scarecrow. "Look at that funny looking tree over there!"
"She doesn't look too happy," observed the Lion as we approached.
I soon noticed there was a ruby red jewel in the trees left branch and reached for it, but as soon as I did the tree snatched it away and closed its leaves around the jewel.
"Oh no you don't!" the tree scowled. "This is my jewel and you're not getting it!" The the tree ruffled its leaves in the upper branches as if trying to shake something loose. "Hey, get out of there you pests!" it exclaimed in irritation.
"Have you got a problem?" asked the Tin Woodman sympathetically.
"I've got itchy bugs!" moaned the tree in agony. "They disguise themselves as my fruit so they can eat them! I'd give anything to be rid of these pests!"
"How about that jewel?" I asked.
"Well, alright," said the tree. "If you can get rid of my itchy bugs I will give you this jewel."
So I, who was of course an expert on all kinds of bugs, climbed up the tree and found all of the fruits which had one or more spots on them and I knocked them down.
The tree smiled with grateful relief when I was done. "Now I suppose I'll have to give you this jewel. Alright, here you go, and mind you take care of it."
"Thank you," said the Tin Woodman gratefully.
"Our first red jewel!" exclaimed the Scarecrow happily.
We added the jewel to the medallion and then we came upon the pond where we stopped and watched multicolored frogs hopping on toadstools, I noticed curiously that each frog would only land on a toadstool with spots the same color as he was. After four frog had jumped across and into the pond I saw the fourth one jump up on a lily pad which dislodged another ruby red jewel for us.
"Look! Another red jewel!" I exclaimed as I picked it up and put it into the medallion.
We left the pond and we soon came across some funny looking pipes which had been disconnected from each other so that the water flowing in couldn't come into the bucket at the bottom. With my directions, the others carefully rearranged the pipes in a good working order so that the water that came in filled the bucket, and as it did so we found our third red jewel in the bucket.
"Another red jewel!" exclaimed the Scarecrow as he added it to the medallion.
Then as we had all of the red jewels we needed we left the Quadlings grotto, going back the way we came climbing down the rope ladder.
"Do we have to go this way?" muttered the Lion who seemed to not like heights.
"It's alright, Lion, we're right behind you," said the Tin Woodman comfortingly.
"Everybody down?" I asked as I reached the bottom.
"Just," said the Lion with a breath of relief.
"See, if you just take it slowly everything will be fine," said the Tin Woodman.
"We can't take it too slowly," said the Scarecrow seriously. "Dorothy is waiting for us.
I agreed and so heading back to the signpost we went this time in the direction of the West to the Land of the Winkies. However when we reached the pathway we found it was being barred by a thrash of gnarled trees with menacing faces.
"The path is blocked! Quick Tin Woodman, get chopping!" the Scarecrow exclaimed.
"I can't!" said the Tin Woodman in despair. "Those trees are tricky trees!"
"Tricky trees!" repeated the Lion fearfully.
"You better believe it, pussy cat!" snapped one tree at the Lion. "And you're not going anywhere unless you can figure out which of us is making the wrong sound!"
They then began making squeaking noises everywhere and suddenly one of the made a noise like a raspberry and I quickly pointed to the first tree I thought was making it.
"Aw... How did you know it was me?" the tree I pointed to moaned in defeat. "Now we'll have to let you pass!"
"Hooray!" we all exclaimed as the tree bent back their gnarled branches and let us through.
"Those trees were so rude!" the Tin Woodman declared once they were far behind us.
"Doesn't seem to bother that bird up there!" the Lion pointed up at a large black raven like bird perched upon a branch of one of the gnarled trees.
"Shh... it could be spying for the Wicked Witch of the West!" the Scarecrow whispered warningly.
We spotted a tunnel in the side of a cave with stairs leading down into it and thought maybe it could be a secret passage so we went cautiously down into it.
"Watch your head!" the Scarecrow said as we entered into the darkness of the cave.
We entered into what seemed to be a mine shaft and there was trolly carrying away rocks in trays balanced out on a scale nearby with with large golden bells.
"There is bound to be a jewel down in that hole!" the Scarecrow exclaimed knowingly.
"Let's keep digging out the rocks until we find it!" I suggested eagerly.
And so we did, and we piled the rocks into the trays, balancing them carefully on the scale with the Golden bells and then the trolly would carry them away. Finally the crane that was digging into the bottom of the hole was pulled up out of it and sure enough we found a bright yellow topaz jewel clutched in it.
"We did it! And there's the jewel! Our very first yellow one!" the Scarecrow exclaimed with delight as he took the jewel and placed it into the medallion.
We then went down a flight of stairs which led us into a cold corner of the cave which was filled all with ice and we saw the cutest little penguin ever, and we also noticed there was another yellow jewel hidden in a block of ice. I had an idea and fed the penguin some fish so that it would leap, and climb, and jump up onto stairs of the ice cave and then then drop the rocks at the top onto the block of ice at the bottom of it and released the yellow jewel from it.
"Well done!" exclaimed the Scarecrow. "Thank you, little penguin. We have to go now."
We put the new yellow jewel with the rest in our medallion. Then we soon heard the sound of someone weeping in the dark cave. We turned into another shaft and we found a young Winkie girl miner who really seemed to be in distress.
"What's wrong?" inquired the Scarecrow gently.
"That Wicked Witch is so scary! I thought I heard her just now and it gave me such a fright I jumped up and all my things in the wheel barrel fell into this pit, and now my lantern has gone out and I can't seem to find them!" the poor girl sobbed.
"Perhaps we could find them for you," suggested the Tin Woodman kindly.
"Would you?" exclaimed the girl, brightening. "I'd be ever so grateful! In fact, if you can find just three of my things I'll find a jewel for you."
So I took a flashlight out of my special suitcase and I shined it over the crevices in the pit and I found an umbrella, a pair of scissors, and a hammer.
"My hammer! Just what I needed! You're a darling!" the grateful girl said to me. "Now just three quick strikes... and... Here's a jewel for you!" She had dug out of the cave wall the third yellow jewel we needed which was the last jewel we needed to complete our quest to save Dorothy.
"Now we can rescue our friend!" said the Scarecrow in triumph.
So then we found our way out of the mine and once again we met with the evil looking bird. We snuck past it carefully not wanting it to give us away to the Witch as we now approached the yellow castle just before us.
"Here we come Dorothy!" exclaimed the Scarecrow as we walked up the steps.
"I do hope she's alright!" said the Tin Woodman anxiously.
"I was wondering... Maybe we should turn back and think it over!" the Lion suggested frettfully.
"There's no turning back, Lion! Dorothy needs us!" exclaimed the Scarecrow urgently.
"My stomach is doing backflips!" the Lion groaned.
"The castle door! It looks very solid!" the Scarecrow pointed out. "Can you see where the medallion fits... right there in the center?"
So I took the medallion and I carefully pressed it into the center of the door and at once it began to glow and the door was opened seemingly of its own accord.
"The door is open! Now let's get in there and find Dorothy!" exclaimed the Scarecrow marching forward.
"Oh dear! This isn't gonna be good for my health!" the Lion moaned, putting his paws up to his eyes.
"Are you a Lion or a mouse?" the Tin Woodman chided.
"Squeak!" the Lion replied timidly.
We entered the castle and we walked up a long flight of stairs and as we got higher we began to hear the voice of a young girl cry for help.
"What's that noise?" I asked.
"It's my heart!" said the Lion.
"Help! Help! Please come and help me!"
"Hold on, Dorothy! We're coming!" I called out as we neared the last of the stairs.
"Look! There's the Witch's tower up ahead!" said the Scarecrow pointing straight up.
"I can't see! I have to keep my eyes closed!" the Lion exclaimed pitifully.
We climbed up into the tower room where we found a little girl looked in a rectangular shaped prison with her face peeking out of a barred window.
"Dorothy, we're here!" exclaimed the Scarecrow.
"My friends! You've come! I knew you would!" Dorothy said with delighted relief.
Just then the Wicked Witch of the West appeared out of a puff of smoke and looked maliciously upon us. "You think you're so clever you miserable pumpkin! You may have made it into my castle, but you will never rescue Dorothy! Because I am the wickedest wicked witch of all!" she cackled.
It all seemed to be hopeless, but I fortunately remembered that most all wicked witches are allergic to water, it makes them melt. And so I reached into my suitcase and I drew out a bucket full of water.
"If you throw that water I'll diminish the lot of you!" the Witch threatened.
But I threw the water onto her anyway, soaking her from head to foot.
"Water! How could you! I'm melting! I'm melting!" the witch shrieked as she began dripping and shrinking right before our eyes. "You were far too clever!" were her last words to me as she vanished in a dark puddle, leaving only her hat behind.
"We've destroyed the Wicked Witch!" the Scarecrow exclaimed in victory.
"And rescued me!" exclaimed Dorothy as she was now free from the prison which had vanished. "Thank you all! Tin Woodman you're crying," she said, noticing the Tin Woodman was wiping his eyes.
"I am just so happy to see you safe, Dorothy!" the Tin Woodman exclaimed as he rushed forward and embraced Dorothy lovingly.
"All that is left of the Wicked Witch is her hat!" said the Scarecrow. He picked it up and put it on his own head and began to dance a silly jig in it. "I'm a wicked witch! I'm a wicked witch!"
A winged monkey then suddenly appeared on the windowsill. "What is your command, Master?" it asked.
"Why, it must be the hat!" exclaimed the Scarecrow in realization. "It must be used to control the Winged Monkey. Now he can take us back to Oz!"
And so the Winged Monkeys did so. And I stood in the center of the throne room of the Emerald City and looked up a giant green head hanging down from the ceiling which spoke to us.
"I am Oz, the Great and Terrible!" it boomed. "Why have you come back?"
"We have come to claim our promises," said the Scarecrow simply.
"What promises?" asked the head.
"You promised," began Dorothy.
"When we destroyed the Wicked Witch of the West," said the Scarecrow.
"And rescued Dorothy," said the Tin Woodman.
"You would grant our wishes." said the Lion.
"You mean the Wicked Witch is really destroyed?" the big head exclaimed in shock. "Oh my! This is most... unexpected! Come back tomorrow for the Great Oz must have time to think it over!"
"You've had plenty of time for thinking already!" said the Scarecrow impatiently.
"Everyone has to keep their promises!" declared Dorothy.
"I am Oz! The Great and Terrible!" the big head boomed again.
The Lion in his rage and indignation let out a loud roar that shook the whole room and caused a screen nearby to fall over.
"Did I do that?" said the Lion, surprised at his own strengh.
Behind the screen we saw was a short elderly man with a gray mustache wearing a greenish gray suit.
"Who are you?" asked Dorothy in surprise.
"I am Oz," replied the man humbly.
"Why, you're only a pretend wizard!" gasped Dorothy.
"Well, I'm trying to be a wizard, I'm just not very good at it," he admitted shamefully.
"But this is terrible! How shall I ever get my heart?" exclaimed the Tin Woodman.
"Or my brain?" added the Scarecrow.
"Or my courage?" added the Lion.
"My friends, you don't need a wizard to give you these things," the pretend wizard assured them.
"We don't?" they all said in surprise.
"Of course not. You have them already," he said easily. "Who was always thinking through the problems?" he asked
"Well, I was, I guess," replied the Scarecrow thoughtfully.
"Then you have a brain!" declared the Wizard. "And who was always concerned about Dorothy?"
"Me!" said the Tin Woodman in realization.
"Then that means you already have a heart!" declared the Wizard. "And didn't you, Lion, plunge ahead even though you were scared?" he said pointedly addressing the Lion.
"Well, what do you know? I'm a courageous Lion after all!" the Lion exclaimed happily as he realized it was true.
"But we really never could have got through if it hadn't been for you, Mr. Wogglebug," the Scarecrow said to me. "Wizard," he said addressing the old man. "Could you give our friend here some kind of reward?"
The Wizard smiled and reached into a black bag and pulled out a gold medal inlaid with jewels and proudly presented it to me.
