I know, I need to update my fanfic. I'm almost done writing a chapter, and, as soon as I am, I'll post it. I just had to write this; the idea was stuck in my head for quite some time, and while I was trying to write that, this was just being thought, so I wrote it, and now, hopefully, I'll be able to finish a chapter. Btw, I'm not sure how much I like this. Some parts I was very pleased with, while others I didn't like at all. Anyways, please review, whether it's good or bad, I'd really appreciate it. 8
To make it clearer, what's in italics is what Lucas is thinking about; yes, most of the story is in italics, but i just wanted to make sure it made sense, 'cause i didn't think the way i wrote it made it too clear.
"Hey,"
Lucas quickly turned around, startled by the love of his life. He was ecstatic to have her back in his presence, but, for his sake, he needed to share with her his worries.
"I, I didn't think…..you were coming back," Lucas finally stuttered out.
Peyton looked at him, for some length of time, with a serious, but saddened look on her face. "I told you, Luke, I'll never leave you; I promise.
Lucas quietly nodded, and then began to think back to when it all started, a little over a year ago.
Quietly closing the front door behind her, Peyton began to walk into the engaged couples' home. She was hoping to just get to the bathroom, without any interruptions, take a nice, long bath, and put off talking about thing until later, but, before she even got halfway to the bathroom, he saw her.
'Hey Blondie," Lucas cooed while walking up to her, tempting to pull his arms around her and pull her in for a nice kiss, but, she pulled away.
Lucas, very confused by his fiancés actions, began to speak up. "Peyton, what's wrong?"
"Lucas…..," Peyton began. "We have a lot to talk about."
Now incredibly nervous, Lucas quickly pulled Peyton over to the couch, and sat them both down. "Well, start talking then, Peyton. I'm lost here, and I'd really like to know what's going on."
Peyton didn't want to talk, at all. But, she knew that she had to, and that it was going to hurt both of them, which was the last thing she wanted to do.
"Well," Peyton said, not quite knowing how to begin, or how to say any of it, "You know how I haven't been feeling too good lately?"
"Yeah, you've had that really bad cold for quite some time."
Peyton shook her head yes, then continued talking. "Well, while I was away with Brooke this weekend, I started to stumble a lot, and I ended up falling,"
"You fell?" Lucas almost yelled, beginning to freak out.
"Can you let me finish, please?" Peyton said with a pained tone to her voice.
"Yes, yes, I'm sorry."
'Thank you," Peyton simply stated. "Well, I fell, so, we went to the emergency room, in case I had received a concussion from the fall, or anything pertaining to it. But, while I was there, I kind of, discovered something……"
Lucas, now frightened more than he could ever possible imagine, just looked at her, his face pained, confused, and asking for more information. He heard mumbles as Peyton told him what she discovered, but, she had said it so quietly and fast, that he hadn't heard the words.
"What?"
"I, I have cancer." Peyton said, tears now slowly rolling down her face.
"You…..have….cancer?" Lucas asked, hesitantly, praying that he'd heard it wrong.
"Yes," Peyton whispered.
"No, Peyton, you can't have cancer, it's not possible!," Lucas began to yell.
"Lucas, please!"
"No, Peyton, you don't understand! I can't lose you!"
"Calm down, please!" Peyton said, tears now coming down faster. Lucas realized how he was acting, and immediately calmed down, repeating sorry's over and over, while his eyes filled up with tears.
"Thank you," Peyton whispered. "Now, when I went, they said that they caught it fairly early, so, everything should be okay, but, there's still much to find out about the case……I just, I need you to be with me through this, okay?" Peyton barley choked out.
"Of course," Lucas said, fighting hard to keep the tears from falling. "I just, I NEED you to promise me that you won't leave me. Nothing can happen to you, okay? I NEED you here."
"I can't do that……I want to, Luke, I do, but it's not my choice what happens, and I can't…." Peyton said, now crying hysterically.
Lucas was about to speak, but Peyton interrupted him. "You HAVE to know, Lucas, that if it was my choice, I'd be with you forever. I can't lose you, either, and if something happens to me, I will, don't you understand? There is NOTHING in this world that I love more than I love you; you are my life, and if I lose you, I have nothing; I am nothing without you. I NEED you to remember that; that you are, you have been, and you will ALWAYS be the most important thing to me, and that if I could, right here and now, I would promise you that, because the only thing that scares me more than having cancer, and being sick this way, is not having you. So, no matter what happens, even though I know it's not fair to ask you, since I couldn't promise, I need you to promise me that you'll never forget that, because, if you don't know how much I love you, everything means nothing."
Lucas was now crying; he couldn't keep the tears in, and they were plummeting down his face like a waterfall. "I promise," Luke cried out. "And you also, remember, I love you more than anything, too," Lucas told her, before grabbing her into a tight hug, and holding her there, with them both crying, the rest of the night.
The few weeks following that night had been terribly hard; they found out the specifics of the cancer, and they were still taking it all in. By this unexpected issue coming up, things became clearer for the couple; they both knew how much they needed Peyton to be okay, and they realized how truly strong their love was, but that also just made everything all that much harder.
When Peyton first started chemo, the doctor told them that she was responding very well, and that things were strongly looking up. She and Lucas had been thrilled to hear the news, but, as soon as Peyton started to lose her hair, it not only upset Peyton, but for reasons she couldn't figure out, it began to worry her more. Peyton also became terribly disappointed when her hair had quickly vanished; when the chemo first started, before she even thought about the fact that she would lose her hair, too happy about the new from the doctor, her and Lucas had decided to move their wedding up. They realized that there was no sense in waiting; if she was fine, which they were strongly rooting for the fact that she would be, they wanted to be married right away, so that not only would they spend the rest of their lives together, but, it'd mean even more; the fact that she had gotten cancer had made them realize that. Not to mention, that, if everything ended up not being alright, they wanted nothing more than to be married before Peyton's time would end.
When they had moved the wedding up, they figured Peyton would probably still be going to chemo during it, but, what mattered to them most was the fact that they were getting married; Peyton didn't care how weak she'd be, if Lucas was there, and she was committing to the law that she'd be with him 'til death did them part, no matter when that may be, she'd be able to do anything. Lucas could tell that Peyton had been very upset about the fact that she barley had any hair left, even though she rarely every c complained about it, and after talking to Haley about it, worrying about how terrible his soon-to-be-wife must be feeling, he confronted Peyton, telling her that if she wanted to hold off on the wedding, because of the problem with her hair, that'd be fine. However, Peyton seemed a bit appalled that Lucas would even think that. She told him that none of that mattered; she, of course, would much rather have hair, and look beautiful at her own wedding, but, if she didn't, and he was still marrying her, she didn't care.
Peyton and Lucas realized that many people probably wouldn't be able to attend the wedding; they had sent out invitations, but they figured that it'd be such short notice that only their very close relatives would be able to make it. Time seemed to go faster than normal as the wedding was approaching; they'd spent as much times as they could together, whether it was planning the wedding, or if it was while Peyton was at chemo. The whole situation taught them that anything could happen, at any time, and because of that, they'd become even more inseparable than they were before, even though it was quite hard to imagine that was even possible.
It was about a week before the wedding, when Lucas made Peyton cry like she hadn't since the day she'd told him. She'd cried a lot; they both had, but this situation put her in hysterics. Brooke had made Peyton a gorgeous dress, and everyone had told her she was going to look incredible. The problem was, no matter what, she didn't believe them. To her, whether she had a wig on, or if she was just walking around with her small amount of hair, she was the opposite of beautiful. She'd told Brooke, but, as much as she wanted to, she couldn't tell Lucas. He'd already been hurting to much, and letting him know that she was hurting even more, from that, would just make it so much worse for him. The problem was, he knew her so well, that he figured something having to do with that was going on, and since she wouldn't open up to him about it, he decided to talk to Brooke. Reluctantly, Brooke told him how Peyton felt; it again worried him, making him think, again, that they should put off the wedding, but Brooke told him
that was the wrong approach. Peyton had already told her that he'd asked, and as much as she hated the fact of her hair, she'd be much more upset about not marrying Lucas. A few days after Lucas talked to Brooke, Lucas had an idea. It was when it was set up, and Peyton went through with it, that the tears came flowing through.
When Peyton had come home, she found that Lucas had set something up; she was to follow a list that would bring her across certain things, and to him, at the very end. On her way to him, it told her to stop at certain places, each one having a gift for her. She'd found a box of chocolates, roses, a new camera, a picture of them when they'd first started going out, and postcards from her father, her brother, and a tape she was told to watch before she could go find him. Not to mention, there was a sign at every place one of her gifts was hiding, that told her how much he loved her. Peyton knew that Lucas would realize if she hadn't watched the tape, so she headed to her living room, popped the tape in, sat on the couch, and began to watch. When it was over, she'd already had tears rolling down her face softly; the tape had her father, her brother, Lucas, Haley, Nathan, Brooke, and everyone else she loved dearly talking to her, telling her how much they loved her, how beautiful she was, and telling her their favorite memories with her.
It was then, when the tape finished, that Lucas walked out; he had on a tux, not the one he'd be wearing at the wedding, but a much sillier one, that was bright yellow and had fringes on almost every edge. On his feet were huge, dark purple shoes, and he had green, nylon gloves on, but, none of that was what caught Peyton's attention. When her first came out, he had a sombrero on his head, but as soon as he took it off, Peyton was crying uncontrollably. He'd shaved his head; he was completely bald, with not a hair left on his head.
He was beginning to get insanely nervous, but he decided to speak, anyway.
"There's nothing in this world that is more beautiful than you are now. And, if you don't want to believe me, then I'm going to have to go to our wedding like this. Because, baby, have you EVER seen anyone look this goofy?" With tears still speeding down her face, she began to laugh, and then ran towards him and wrapped her arms around him tighter than ever before. She was crying into his shoulder, soaking it, while murmuring 'thank you's' and 'I love you's' in his ear repeatedly. When she finally calmed down, she began to speak.
"As much as I love you for doing this, if you wear that outfit to the wedding, I might have to hurt you," Peyton giggled out. "But, your hair…..why did you? It finally looked good!"
Lucas was smiling. "Yes, I agree, it finally did look good, but, that doesn't mean anything. I'm officially a baldy now, and I can't think of any other person in my life that I'd EVER voluntarily become a baldy for. No matter what you think, you're going to be the most beautiful thing, ever, walking down that aisle, but, the thought that came to my mind while I was trying to convince you of that, is to make myself look pretty darn stupid. I mean, I would've shaved my head for you any day, but, I probably would've just buzzed it, if I didn't want you to not only look beautiful, but, feel it too."
It had been about thirty seconds since Lucas had finished talking, and he was about to continue speaking again, since Peyton had yet to say anything regarding his last statement. But, when he opened his mouth, before he had a chance to talk, she laid a soft, yet very loving kiss on his lips, and when she pulled away, whispered, "I love you."
"I love you, too, Blondie."
Peyton woke up next to Brooke; today was her wedding day. After taking hours to get ready, it was finally time to head to the church. Peyton was amazed when she saw what her two best friends had done with the church; there was white and light pink everywhere, but evenly distributed, making the church look like a dreamland. She headed back to the room in which she'd be waiting for her dad, who she hadn't seen in months; he offered to come down when Peyton discovered she had cancer, but she told him everything was alright, and insisted that he stay at work.
"Haley and I are going to make sure everything's on track, okay?" Brooke asked Peyton. Lost in thought, Peyton just gave back a nod, while staring at herself in the mirror. It was then she heard a knock, turned around, and saw her dad.
"Dad!" Peyton cried out.
"Hi baby," Her dad whispered. "You look amazing, you know."
"Yeah, I know," Peyton said, while smiling. "I'm so glad you're here! I've missed you so much."
"I know, I've missed you, too! And, all I kept thinking, was what if……something happened….." her dad said, while getting teary-eyed.
Peyton broke down right there, running into her dads arms, while letting out loud, painful-sounding sobs.
"Please, honey, don't cry."
"I love you so much, daddy."
"I know you do; I love you, too."
She gave him a kiss on his cheek, and just stared at him for a moment.
"It's not going to be okay…." She slowly whispered.
"Yes it is honey, don't worry!"
"No, dad, it's not. I've stopped responding to the treatments they've been giving me; they told me last week, but I didn't want to ruin the wedding. I just want us to be happy, and while I am, so incredibly happy, I'm so scared."
Larry began to cry. "Really? I mean, they're, they're sure?"
"Yes."
"Well, baby, there's not much we can do, now is there? But, still, everything will be okay. It's my job to protect you, and no matter what, I promise, everything will be okay."
"What about Lucas…..?"
"You're going to go out there, and you're going to tell that boy how much you love him. Then, you're going to marry him, and you two are going to be insanely happy. And when it's time, it's time. He'll be okay, I promise."
"But, how am I going to tell him dad? If it's breaking my heart this much, and yours, it's going to kill him!"
"Tell him the way you told him you had cancer to begin with…just make sure you do it soon, okay? Either during, or after the honeymoon; don't leave him out of the loop."
"Okay…….and you…..i don't want to leave you."
"But, honey, you won't be. You're going to be in my heart; I'll always have you with me. That won't mean that I'm not going to be sad, or that my heart's not breaking right now, but everything will be okay, I promise."
"Thank you, daddy."
"You're welcome, baby. Just……one more thing?"
"Anything."
"When the time comes, say hi to your mom for me, please."
"Of course."
And with that, they both continued to sob for a minute, while Larry held his daughter, until it was time for them to walk down the aisle. Peyton quickly thanked the fact that she had waterproof mascara on, made sure her tear stains were gone, put on a smile, and began to walk out the room with her father.
As soon as Lucas saw Peyton, a huge grin spread across his face; she looked amazing. Her dress was so simple, yet to elegant, and fit her curves in every which way, while she had the biggest smile on her face, which made her look ten times more beautiful than she already did. When she finally reached the alter, he took her hands, and they just stared into each other's eyes. The priest than announced that it was time for them to say their vows, and Lucas began.
"Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer, you are my everything. Without you, everything in my life, everything around me, and I myself would be nothing. Nothing in this world can even come close to what we have, and what I feel for you; my love for you is my life, and no part of it could ever die. You've changed my life; I never imagined I could be this happy, or this in love, but with you, and with our love, I've discovered that everything and anything is possible. I love you more than anything, and as we grow old together, the only thing that love will do is grow."
It was then that Peyton began to cry again, but, it was now her turn, so she wiped her eyes, cleared her throat, and began to speak.
"Lucas Eugene Scott, you've taught me everything; how to love, how to have hope, how to believe, and most importantly, no matter what, you and I will always be together. At first, I always said that I'd always be in your heart, so, no matter what, we'd always be together. But, I've realized that it's much more than that. It's not that we'll always be in each other's hearts; it's the fact that you and I share the
same one. I am you, and you are me; without each other, no matter what way or form, we're not alive. No matter what happens to either one of us, we'll always be together, because of that; we're one soul, on person, separated into two different bodies, and because we'll always have each other, everything else will be fine. Our love will always be there; our love is the foundation on which our lives have grown, and that, I promise, will never falter. Because of the love that you and I share, we can get through any obstacles that shall ever come our way; the love will ALWAYS be there."
By the time Peyton was done, Lucas, the priest, and everyone else in the church had tears slowly running down their faces. All but four guests who were invited showed up, and everyone in the church knew of the cancer, thus making it all the more real for not only them, but for everybody. The two then shared their 'I do's,' and had a great loving reception with their friends and family.
Because of the fact that Peyton had to stay for her chemo, they decided not to have a honeymoon, but to share something special in their own home. It was about a week later, when all the wedding stuff had finally dimmed down, that Peyton decided to tell Lucas about chemo no longer working. She wanted to tell him when they were both calm, so, one night after dinner, while they were sitting on the couch watching a movie, she decided to break the news.
"Lucas…..i think we need to talk."
"Okay, what's up? Are you feeling alright?"
"Yeah, I feel fine, but, well, I won't be going to chemo anymore……"
"Peyton……that's a bad move; the doctor said it was really helping,"
"No, Luke……..I'm not responding to the treatments anymore; the chemo's done helping me."
"Wh-what?"
"I'm so sorry,"
"Nonono, Peyton, if anything, don't be sorry, please! It's not your fault."
"But, I don't want to lose you….."
"You'll never lose me, love, that I promise."
She looked up at him, tears filling up her eyes, and laid a soft kiss on his cheek.
"Do you, um, do you know how much longer you have?" Lucas asked with a very nervous tone.
"Not really, but they said it wouldn't be more than six months."
Lucas gulped. "Well, I guess we're going to have to make the most of that, now aren't we?"
Peyton shook her head.
"I love you," she whispered.
"I know; I love you, too."
It was then that total and utter realization hit both of them, and just like the night when they shared the news for the first time, they both sat on the couch crying, Lucas holding Peyton tight.
It was amazing how much their love grew; it was already so strong, that nobody thought that in just four months time it could evolve and mean as much as it did, but, as they had said, with their love, anything is possible. They spent most of the time with their worries pushed to the side; they talked about what was going to happen quite often, but for the most part, they were just so thrilled to be in the presence of one another, that happiness, joy, love, and hope were the only feelings they were capable of feeling.
It was a rainy afternoon, about four and a half months after the night on the couch. Peyton had woken up from an afternoon nap; she'd gone looking around the house for Lucas when she fell. Luckily, he'd heard her calling for him, and he found her just seconds after she'd collapsed.
When Lucas could finally see her, tears came to his eyes. She looked so helpless in the hospital bed; so weak, and the worst part was the fact that there was nothing he could do to help her. He slowly walked over to her and placed a light kiss on her forehead. He turned around to pull a chair right next to her bed when he heard her.
"Hi," she whispered.
"Hi," he said; the tears began to fall.
"Oh Luke, please don't cry. I'm so sorry."
"Peyton, whatever you do, don't you dare be sorry! This is not your fault, okay?"
She nodded.
"I'm just, I'm so scared….." she said softly.
"I know, me too. But, everything will be okay, I promise."
"I know it will, but that doesn't stop me from worrying…"
"I know love. As much as I hate to leave you, I've got to go let your father, Brooke, Nathan, and Haley know you're awake; they were very worried about you."
"Okay….."
As he turned to leave, she stopped him.
"Luke, wait!"
"What?"
"I love you."
"I love you, too, Peyton."
The next two weeks went by very slowly; they both knew that their time together was almost up, so whenever she was awake, they continued to remind one another of their love, when they weren't busy holding on to each other and staring into each other's eyes.
It'd been exactly nineteen days, twenty two hours, and 45 minutes since Peyton had been put in the hospital bed. She was more than incredibly weak now, and he was the only one still allowed in the room. Peyton had been asleep for the past four hours, while Lucas just looked at his wife, hoping she knew how amazing she was.
Peyton slowly opened her eyes, looked around, and found Lucas; a smile appeared on her face. They just locked eyes for what seemed like hours, when finally, she opened her mouth.
"We haven't got much time left….."
"I know."
"You saved me, Lucas Scott."
"No, Peyton, you saved me."
He kissed her lightly on the lips, her doing her best to return the movement.
"I love you." He whispered, while being scared to death.
"I know you do," she choked out. "I love you, too."
"God, Peyton, I'm going to miss you so much," he cried.
"As will I, but, Luke, we really don't need to miss each other."
"What are you talking about?"
"Don't you remember? We share the same heart; we're always going to be together."
He nodded, knowing she was more than correct.
She looked at him, closed her eyes for a moment, opened them back up and told him,
"I'm not going to leave you Luke, I promise."
And with that, she closed her eyes, her heart rate slowly dropping, and within minutes, she was gone.
"Oh, Lucas!"
"Oh, sorry Peyton; I was just thinking."
"About what?"
"You, of course."
She blushed. "Well, Luke, I don't think I can stay too long, so why don't we sit down and you can tell me about everything going on?"
"I'd love to,"
And they sat down, talking and sharing loving glances, until it was time for her to go.
"I love you, Luke. And, I'll be back, for as long as you want, I'll always come back, and even then, I'll never leave you,"
"I love you, too, Peyt."
It was then that Lucas realized, once and for all, that even though in all reality, she was gone, she was never going to leave him. She'd told him millions of times, repeating it every time she came to visit him after she passed on, and even though he believed her, his faith wasn't strong enough to stop doubting it. As she'd said, they'd shared the same heart, and even if her body was buried in the ground, her soul was still a part of him, and because of that, everything would be alright.
They shared a soft kiss, and then she was gone.
