There were exactly three more weeks until Carlos and James' one-year anniversary…not that he'd been counting or anything. He'd never had a one-year anniversary so he wasn't really sure what you were supposed to do for them, especially when you were in a same sex relationship. With a girl it'd be easy –he'd plan a romantic evening, complete with flowers and maybe even sing her a love song. He was almost positive that wasn't the way to go with James.

In fact, it was kind of weird when he thought about it but it was almost like HE was the girl in this relationship. At least that's how he felt, anyway. James would hold doors and pull out chairs for Carlos and as much as he complained about it he sort of liked it, even if it was a threat to his masculinity.

James always took control of planning dates, making dinner reservations and all that stuff. So Carlos was fairly certain that an occasion as big as a one-year anniversary was not supposed to fall on him and that James was currently taking care of the matter. Carlos just wished he would say something about it, though. There was only one week left until all of them went their separate ways for Christmas vacation. Carlos was going to visit his family, James was going to San Diego to be with his, Logan was going to Malibu for a while before heading home to Dallas, and Kendall was vacationing in Bali with his brother.

That was perfectly understandable. They hadn't seen their families in a long time and for most of them it had been even longer since they'd been able to go home. Even if James didn't celebrate Christmas, Carlos understood his need to go and be with family. That was okay with him. What really bothered him was that nothing had been said about whether or not James was coming home for New Year's Eve…the night their one-year anniversary happened to fall on. But he would wait patiently for James to bring it up.

There were two weeks left until Carlos and James' one-year anniversary. Carlos was starting to panic, because here the four of them were, all saying goodbye at the airport and James still hadn't spoken a word about New Year's Eve. Carlos had casually tried to drop a hint or two, but James didn't seem to be catching on.

"So what are you doing for New Year's Eve?" Carlos had questioned, casually draping his arm over the back of the couch. James had looked up from the magazine he was reading and shrugged. "Watch the ball drop with the family, I guess. No big plans for me this year." Carlos' shoulders had visibly slumped in disappointment, but James had gone right back to reading. For someone who was so smart he sure was dumb when it came to catching hints. He didn't know why he didn't just come out and bring up their anniversary himself. Mainly because he was afraid of being made fun of, he supposed. Maybe guys didn't celebrate anniversaries, maybe that was just a girly thing to do. Or maybe the relationship just meant way more to Carlos than it did to James and if that was the case he'd rather not know.

Though the four boys spent an awful lot of time together due to their demanding work schedule, they were all best friends and Carlos was finding it truly hard to say goodbye at the airport. He gave Logan and Kendall lingering hugs and told them both to have fun, be careful, to call him, etc. Some time apart would be nice since they drove each other crazy being together 24/7, but he knew he would miss them anyway because they were like his brothers.

Logan and Kendall walked off toward their respective gates and Carlos stood alone with James. It was now or never. "So you have a good Christmas," James spoke up. "Tell the family I said hello." He leaned in and hugged Carlos tightly, giving him a little squeeze. "I'll call you every day." He wouldn't kiss Carlos goodbye, of course. They were in a crowded airport with paparazzi and onlookers and he wasn't ready to be "out", as he'd told Carlos numerous times. So the two men parted ways after the hug, with Carlos glancing back once to watch his tall, handsome boyfriend disappear around a corner.

There was one week left until Carlos and James' one-year anniversary. And though it was Christmas Eve and everyone else in his house was excited for the morning and full of Christmas spirit, Carlos was just a little down in the dumps. James hadn't called all day and on top of that it had started to sink in that their one-year anniversary just didn't mean anything.

As he was sitting there feeling sorry for himself his cell phone began to ring and Carlos dove for it, hoping that it would be James but a quick glance at the caller I.D. told him that it wasn't. "Oh, hi Logan." He couldn't hide the disappointment from his voice.

"Hi Carlos, it's nice to talk to you too!" Logan's voice dripped sarcasm on the other end.

"Sorry," Carlos sighed. "I was hoping you were James."

"I'm definitely not James. Sorry to burst your bubble. Anyway, I called to see what you're doing this week, after Christmas."

"Um…I don't know. No plans, really." He didn't want to admit he'd been sitting around waiting for James.

"What? No big New Year's plans? Come on." Logan sounded surprised. Carlos sighed, deciding to just go ahead and confide in Logan.

"I was hoping James would do something special for our one-year anniversary, but either he forgot or just doesn't think it's a big deal," he admitted finally.

"You should talk to him about it and let him know you're disappointed." Logan suggested.

Carlos shook his head, though he knew Logan couldn't see it over the phone. "I would just feel kind of stupid, you know? Maybe anniversaries just aren't a big deal to him. Do two guys even celebrate stuff like that? Maybe it's too girly."

Logan chuckled softly. "Listen bro, I don't know anything about that. Same sex relationships aren't really my thing. Maybe we should do something over New Year's though, take your mind off of it. What do you say we go up to the mountains and get in some snowboarding? We'll watch the ball drop on TV and have a couple of drinks."

Carlos had to admit it sounded better than the alternative, which was sitting at home and feeling sorry for himself, so he agreed. He was happy about his plans with Logan, but still disappointed that James thought so little of their relationship.

It was exactly one hour until Carlos and James' one-year anniversary. He was trying, really trying, to be in a good mood and put his misery behind him. To Logan's credit, he was trying extra hard to help Carlos forget about being sad. He'd come to the mountains armed with all their favorite guy movies, copious amounts of alcohol and lots of food. They'd spent the day snowboarding and then vegged out on the couch until it got a little closer to midnight. Now, at 11:00, they were both wearing silly 2012 party hats, beers in hand as they listened to music a little too loud and played pool, MTV's coverage of Times Square muted in the background.

"It's your turn, Carlos." Logan said patiently. He hadn't had anywhere near as much as Carlos had had to drink, and the alcohol had seemed to loosen the Latino's lips a bit.

"You know what sucks?" He slurred, pointing his pool stick at Logan, who slumped against the table with a groan. They could be here all night trying to get through this one game. "What's that Carlos?" Logan asked patiently.

"James is a douchebag." Carlos spoke up matter-of-factly, holding the pool stick up in the air the way a person holds up a finger when making a point. "We've been together one whole year and he's NEVER said he loves me."

Logan looked over at Carlos in surprise. "Never? But we say we love each other all the time."

Carlos made a big show of rolling his eyes. "Not like that. He says 'I love you bro.' Bro! He calls me Bro!" Carlos made a noise that was somewhere between a hysterical laugh and a snort. "But not a real I love you, not even after we have s – "

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa." Logan quickly put up a hand to stop him from speaking. "I don't need to hear that, thanks. I get it."

Carlos sighed heavily. "I just don't understand. If he doesn't love me why is he still with me? You know he won't even tell his family about us?" he frowned.

Logan looked a bit uncomfortable, like this was the last possible discussion he wanted to have. "You know maybe you should talk about this with James…"he started, but luckily the doorbell rang and he brightened a bit. "Oh, hey, can you get that? It's got to be the pizza I ordered."

"Pizza?" Carlos looked confused and pointed toward the huge array of food spread all across the dining room table. "But we already have a ton of food."

"What can I say?" Logan shrugged. "I felt like pizza." He tossed some money at Carlos and sat on the edge of the pool table while his friend went to go answer the door.

"It better be pepperoni," Carlos muttered as he flung the door open.

"I don't have any pepperoni, but I was hoping you'd be happy to see me anyway."

Carlos sobered up as he stood and took in the unexpected sight in front of him. There James stood, cheeks red from the cold, dark hair windblown. He wore a leather jacket, a plaid scarf wrapped around his neck. He smiled almost apologetically. "Happy New Year?"

"James." Carlos said in surprise, taking a step back and tugging him inside. "What are you doing here?"

"Hopefully ringing in the New Year with my boyfriend, if you'll let me." James' boots tracked in snow as he came inside and closed the door behind him. "And celebrating our one-year anniversary."

Carlos stood there, dumbstruck. He finally turned his head to look at Logan, who had quite the smirk on his face. He hopped down from the pool table, reaching for his jacket. "I'm just gonna go and let you two do your thing."

"But – Logan. Where are you going to go at this time of night?" Carlos sputtered, still trying to take in all that was going on.

"You think we didn't plan this?" Logan grinned. "I have my own cabin. Kendall and Dustin are there, we'll have our own party." He gave them both a quick one-armed hug as he struggled into his jacket. "Happy New Year, you two." He waggled his eyebrows at them and hurried out.

Carlos and James were left there, looking at one another in silence. "So you didn't forget." Carlos said slowly.

James smiled, shaking his head. "I thought maybe you did when you didn't mention it. Until the other day when Logan said you were kind of bummed out about it. I'm sorry I made you think I forgot."

"I'm just glad you're here now." Carlos took off his party hat and reached up on his tiptoes to place it on James' head. James wore it proudly, beaming down at his boyfriend. "Oh, hey…look at the time."

Carlos' eyes darted to the clock and saw that it was just a few seconds until midnight. He hurriedly turned the music off and turned the volume up on the TV. James pulled him in close by the waist, "5…4…3…2…1." He shouted along with the TV. Carlos' eyes were lit up in excitement, in anticipation for the ball to drop and signify the beginning of a brand new year. "HAPPY NEW YEAR!" they shouted in unison as the brightly-lit ball dropped and onlookers in Times Square celebrated.

James pulled Carlos in even tighter, if that were possible, pressing a kiss to his lips. It lingered even longer than the happy shouts and cheers on the television screen, and when it broke the two just stared into each others eyes, awe and wonderment on their faces.

"I love you, Carlos." James whispered, and he said with such feeling that Carlos' eyes may have teared up, but just a little bit. "I love you too James," he whispered back. "And not like a bro."