AN: This is not a story. It was something that I needed to write, to ease myself, even if it still hurts. To give somepeace to the soul. I do not expect any reviews of any kind, since it is crap, but I really had to write it.
The smell of summer in our skin
Did she not deserve to be loved?
Does she not have feelings?
He is not going to be there tomorrow, when she most needed him to.
The silent tears fall down, her hands shaking, her lips letting out an agonized sob.
Where is he when she breaks down?
Where is he when she feels lost,vulnerable,confused?
She, that would do anything for his love, she that would give him anything he wanted just to see his smile?
But she will not stop him.
He is going away tomorrow, and there's nothing she can do about it.
He is completely oblivious of her love for him, he does not know how much it hurts to say goodbye. Of how deep it goes inside.
There is nothing there for him, a little friendship, perhaps, not more than a whisper of the feelings she had for him.
Nothing left now; deep breath now, Bella, off to face the world. Check your face in the mirror, they did not need to see your tears.
What has she got now, when everything she ever longed for was slipping away through her fingers?
The old memories of old conversations; the dreams, the wishes, the distant thoughts.ยก; the sound of his voice and those fleeting moments of glances when they both thought the other one wasn't looking. And her love of course
So what have they got to lose you might think?
So complicated yet beautiful, so difficult to understand, so uncontrollable, pure, unadulterated. But that's what makes it so special, the first and last time all rolled into one as you look into the eyes of the person you know. So powerful, true and destructive.
People often forget how it feels to love, to be loved; and that itself is losing the essence of being human.
But which lasts longer, love or hate?
Well.
Anything and everything at the same time.
The fire, the ice.
The desire, the coldness, the future of what could have been.
The long goodbye of something so strong, yet so vulnerable.
But to say goodbye is to die a little.
Yet, if there's nothing you can do, it it left you no options, what can you do? How can you cope with sanity? Is that even possible?
Still, the answer is simple.
You don't. She will never forget, she will never feel the same again. There will always be the smell of summer in our skin, the reminder of a time were both alive, and loving each other, a time when it felt good to do something crazy once in a while.
So farewell my lovely, it was nice dreaming of you.
This is only a one-shot, its not meant for it to be a story, it was only therapeutic. I'm sorry for any of who have read this, it is very bad and very confusing. There isn't much of Twilight here, it was only something that has been happening to me recently, and I just had to. Sorry for wasting your time-
-Angel on Air
I love you.
