i was looking through the songs on this album last night, and i was like "hmph. these are good kevin songs. and even better gwevin songs!" so here's "Through Your Eyes", personally, one of my favorite songs.
DISCLAIMER: ALL THE SONGS USED IN THIS STORY ARE BY "SiLOam", ONE OF THE MOST AWESOME BANDS IN THE WORLD. (i met them ^.^ ) everything but the plot is not mine. i only own the idea. i give Skylark Evanson the credit for the title of this story. LUV U CHICA!
POV: Kevin. Reflecting on how it was like being a mis-mosh of aliens for a while. I dreamed yesterday that
I could build my world,
putting everything in perfect place.
Making my own world used to be the key to my success. I would make everything work the way I planned, and that everything would be perfect. I'd have all the power I'd ever wanted, and nothing would be able to stop me. Not even the Tennysons. Sure, they had Ben with his aliens and Gwen with her mana. They even had Max, but what good did he ever do anyone? He was always either hurt, gone, or of no use at all. They would only minimally set me back.
Scratching off the list of everything I had,
even from the top the view is not that great.
Big Chill let me rise up into the night sky and I looked down on Bellwood. I had expected something huge, like how the huge cities of Chicago and Las Vegas lit up at night with a huge cluster of light, and then slowly the brightness fading away around it. Bellwood was just- unimpressive compared to them. A few street-lights here and there, the Mr. Smoothie sign lit up towards the edge, and that was it. Nothing was special about this town except for my car that I couldn't fit into and that Ben was not driving it... I shot off to try to find something else – something else that would catch my attention and be worthy of my time.
And I would love to say that I'm already happy
in the place I'm living in today.
I didn't necessarily choose this life, but it's what I got, and I'm gonna have to live with it. I was a monster. That's there all there is to it. Nothing more. I was a mixture of aliens that would surely make me invincible.
And I would love to say I've got a selfless nature,
but that is simply not the case.
But you believe me anyway.
People always called me too sure of myself. I tried to make Gwen happy. I tried to let Ben be his stupid little self. I just couldn't take it. I want to say that I'm a good person. Sometimes I am.
But most of the time… I'm not.
Oh, it's time to realize it's eating me when I become my pride.
And the obnoxiousness… Gwen always scolded me for that. She would always say that I wouldn't get anywhere if I couldn't just face the facts and be who I need to be instead of some useless osmosian. But honestly, I didn't care what she said. I was proud of who I was. Just not necessarily when it went that far.
Oh, I know that only you can satisfy beyond the things I own.
Gwen… she was special. Whenever we were together, when her lips met mine, it was like bang. Spark. She was just so… incredible that whatever needed to be done just melted away when she was near. Her magic wasn't just physical. It wasn't just her mana. She had it all about her.
You love me, and I'm a mess that needs to see through your eyes.
I probably looked like a control-freak to her. Energy-hungry. A strive to survive through taking everything away from people. My appearance… whenever I caught sight of it, it was just horrible. My morphed body with multiple arms and the different things that they did. I needed to know how I really looked. Without it, I wouldn't be able to stop myself when this happened again.
I get wrapped up in the "who's that over there?
Are they looking, should I flash a smile?"
Seeing one of them – Gwen or Ben – was the worst. The look of disgust written on their faces and the fear that I would hurt them was horrible. Trying to keep up my arrogant air was even worse. Seeing them get hurt all because of me brought me down a little more each time. When I got more power, I would just gain twice as much back. Whenever I went power-hungry, I completely lost it.
Plastic accolades that breathe this false acclaim,
quickly shatter under little pressure.
I hadn't needed them. Now that I was free and out of the Null Void, ready to take on the world, I had needed no one and no one could get in my way. Seeing as though the Tennysons really needed me to help "save the world", I would be just another thing on their to-do list.
I would love to say that I'm already happy
in the place I'm living in today.
I had started to fall from the sky. I needed more energy if I wanted to keep going like this. Being out in the open was dangerous. Having all the aliens at my advantage was good, but it came at a price. Being a freak and needed every ounce of power or energy I could get my hands on.
And I would love to say I've got a selfless nature,
but that is simply not the case.
But you believe me anyway.
It's funny because they thought I cared. They all thought that I was going to pay for this in the end. That it'll kill me eventually. But it wouldn't. Just as long as my power supply keeps coming and Ben keeps choosing the worst aliens ever, I'd be okay for a while.
Oh, it's time to realize it's eating me when I become my pride.
All the power ate me up and kept me going. It kept the feel of being invincible in me. That was the best. I can keep kicking everyone's ass, and it never hurted me. Or at least it didn't hurt the next day…
Oh, I know that only you can satisfy beyond the things I own.
You love me, and I'm a mess that needs to see through your eyes.
Treating Gwen like crap, it's a thing I used to do. I know she still had feelings for me. And secretly, I still had feelings for her. They weren't as apparent as hers were all of the time, but they're there. Kinda.
I believe that you can change this heart of mine.
I knew all along that she could change me back. I knew it was only temporary. My alien self didn't know that, though. He only thought that she was a useless piece of scum that would throw pink blobs at me all of the time. And I now know that I was only a huge piece of scum that could throw it right back at her – harder.
It killed me.
I keep dealing with the path that leads to the lie.
This life that I had, always hungry, always needing, it was just torture. It hurt to always be taking things away from people. It hurt them. It only gave me more to work with when I got attacked again.
I need you to bring me back to life tonight.
But when I was hooked up to that machine in Los Soledad that Cooper made, I knew my time was near to be normal again. I didn't like it. But I knew. My dead self that needed but one thing would finally be gone, and my human – or at least as close as it can be human – skin would be worn over me again.
Oh, it's time to realize it's eating me when I become my pride.
Disorientation. That's what ate me up inside and forced me to become a freak.
Oh, I know that only you can satisfy beyond the things I own.
Mana and aliens. They were what got me back and set me up to live my life again.
You love me, and I'm a mess that needs to see through your eyes.
Gwen. She was what woke me up and set my life in gear again.
She silently told me that I was perfect in her eyes, and that as long as I didn't pull a stunt like that again, everything would be okay between us.
R&R! this is my first song-fic for Ben10, so i really need to know how i did!
