Sora: I am planning this on being a short chapter drabble series. I sincerely have no idea how this is going to go. So read and enjoy!
Hell is boring as, well hell.
I know I made the right decisions; okay, not all the time. But, I feel like I really tried my best, did my best. Under the circumstances that is.
The plain truth remains however, I died thinking my love had betrayed me, and bitter because my life had been taken up by the vile and impure Shikon Jewel. Yay.
And then I got to come back to life. Yay?
I got to see my love again. Yay!
But, I could tell, he was in love with my reincarnation. Yay…
So, then later after much pain and suffering on my part, I got to die again. Double yay.
I know what you are thinking, wellllllll, she deserved it. But, did I? Did I really?
Now, I'll tell you something else I know. You think, well, she can't be in too much pain, because she sounds pretty dang chipper. This may come as a surprise to you, but I am a good actress. And now, since I get to sit in the cozy furnace of Hell forever, without true love or any of those fantastic things that are supposed to happen to you in life, I find that instead of breaking down and crying my eyes out all the time, it is better to pretend my life is a comedy. This is rather ironic, because before it came to be known as funny, a comedy just meant that it had a happy ending.
That's something I'm willing to pretend that I had.
I won't lie to you either; I wish that I was in Kagome's place. This in fact is not an unusual feeling for people, it is usually labeled: "jealousy", "envy", or "the green-eyed monster". Use which ever strikes your fancy.
I don't hate her though, my reincarnation that is. I can't find it in my heart, and yes, I do have a heart. But, perhaps it was just made a few sizes to small. Oh wait, I think I am mixing that up with another green-colored monster.
I am glad that Inuyasha had found someone to truly love him, unconditionally, irrevocably, and someone who doesn't hold back on putting him in his place. I sigh, I guess I could never have loved him enough, as a hanyou—
Wait a second! Yes I could have, I could have loved him just as well damnit! All I needed was some time, I had been taught to see the world one way for so long that I hadn't been given the proper time to adjust!
But, he wanted her…And I want him to have whatever he wants. I just wish he would've wanted me the most. I am sure that the exact same thoughts ran through Kagome's mind whenever he would run off to come see me. So I guess we are more alike than different, she is my reincarnation.
How overjoyed and guilty I felt during those visits. He had kissed me, held me in his arms once again, and even promised to come down here with me! Hey, at least it isn't cold here. Like taking a depressing vacation.
But, I felt like the devious mistress, hiding behind closed doors, trying to avoid the loving and devoted wife that he kept at home. I shouldn't have had to feel that way, I was first! …first the worst, second the best. Oh woe is me.
Maybe I don't have a heart. Maybe when it cracked so thoroughly in two the first time little spider web cracks had weaved its way through it. So, when my heart broke again, it just spontaneously combusted…this actually happens, I kid you not. All that is left of you is about ten pounds of ashes and an occasional bone, or if you're lucky an arm or a leg.
Ooh, too morbid? Sorry. Hell does that to a person.
Well, maybe I have a "leg" of my heart left. I guess that will be enough to keep me afloat for now.
But, forever is a long time to spend in hell.
Does it have to be forever? Well, my sources say yes, but the leg of my heart says no.
Let Inuyasha be happy, I want that. But, I want to be happy too.
Sora: If you hadn't figured it out, this is about Kikyo. I actually have always liked her :) Anyway, I usually write more depressing things if I write anything with heart break. So please tell me if you like the humor angle or if it is too OC and I can rewrite this chapter in a more serious manner. Although! I plan on having some serious parts too!
Please, please, please review!
