The second story in the "A Baby Changes Everything" series. Em and Dave have been seeing each other for a while, but she wants more. When Dave changes their holiday schedule behind her back, more than the Christmas spirit is thrown out the window. Can they find their way back in time or will they be alone for the holidays?

I don't own Criminal Minds.

Song prompt: "This Gift" by 98 Degrees.

This Gift

The fire crackled in Dave's living room fireplace while the snow fell outside. Inside, Emily Prentiss paced the living room. Her mood was definitely not good and the man sitting on the chair was the number one reason why. She tried to reign in her temper but the more she thought about it, the more the wanted to chuck the lead based lamp at his head.

"Em?" Dave spoke up. "Could you stop pacing and say something?"

Emily glared at him. If it had been possible, the fire in eyes would have set him ablaze. "No."

"No to the pacing, or no to the say something?"

"Both," she bit out.

"Well, would you mind putting another log on the fire because your attitude is making it very chilly in here?"

Emily stopped. "You don't want me near anything that could be used as a weapon right now."

Dave smiled. "I got a sentence out of you. That's a start."

"You want me to say something? Okay, here goes: you're a self-centered, egotistical, anal-retentive, narcissistic…." Em searched her temper-riddled brain for more words.

"Pompous?" Dave supplied.

"Thank you. You're a self-centered, egotistical, anal-retentive, narcissistic, pompous bastard."

The air snapped with electricity. "Are you done?" Dave asked evenly. Em crossed her arms over her chest and glared.

"You did it on purpose."

"No, I didn't," Dave contradicted.

"Yes, you did. You didn't want to go to my mother's Christmas party. You said it on more than one occasion."

"I didn't mean it the way it came out."

Emily's eyebrows rose. "Really? Didn't you specifically say that you would rather walk thru the infernos of hell than to attend a Christmas party at the embassy?"

"I meant any embassy. I wasn't specifying your mother's party. Exactly."

"Exactly? What does that mean?"

"That I don't care for parties. I would rather spend the holidays with you. I figure since we are going to be on a stand down, we could spend that time together."

"Going on a book tour? Especially a book tour you weren't going to tell me about." Em's tone held anger and sadness.

"I was going to tell you. Tonight. You just happened to find out before I could say anything."

Em released her breath to keep from exploding. "All you had to do was pull me aside and say 'Em, I got a call from my editor today and ten cities have been added to my book tour'."

"And you would have been okay with that?" Dave watched her cautiously. He had to be prepared for any sudden movement on her part.

"No. But it would have lowered the urge I have to toss that vase at your head."

"You haven't even spoken to your mother before you got the invitation."

"She's been overseas and we have been working multiple cases. I really haven't had a chance to talk to anyone," Em corrected. Dave just looked at her. "What?"

"You don't want to hear it."

"No, I do. Tell me what's on your mind."

Dave got up from the chair. He figured if anything came his way he would have a better chance at escape. "I think you are going to your mother's party out of guilt."

Emily's eyes widened and then narrowed. Her hand automatically grabbed the vase.

"Don't you dare throw that!" Dave ordered.

"Why?"

"Because you gave me that, that's why. Just put it down and let's talk about this rationally."

Emily didn't put the vase down, but she loosened her grip. "I am not attending my mother's party out of guilt. I thought you and I could do something together that didn't involve going to your cabin or coming to your place or mine. I'm tired of hiding our relationship. I want people to know that we are together."

Dave let out an exasperated sigh. "And we will, but not right now. I'm not quite ready to let people know."

Emily rolled her eyes. "Oh I forgot; this is all about you. If it doesn't suit David Rossi then it doesn't suit anyone. Why don't you come out and say what you really mean?"

"Which is?" Dave asked in a clipped tone.

"You're ashamed of us."

"That isn't true." Dave shook his head.

"The hell it isn't!" Emily thundered. Her grip tightened around the vase. She wanted to scream, cry, to throw something…anything to relieve the pain in her heart. "You used me!"

"No I didn't. I never lied to you. I have been straight up the whole time. You have always known where I was coming from." Dave watched her face. She was so easy to read. "This is about me not saying those three words."

"Which three words?" she asked suspiciously.

Dave became uncomfortable. "You know which ones."

"You mean 'I love you'?" Emily huffed. "Those three words? Don't flatter yourself. I know you'll never say them. And why should you; you never said them to your ex wives, why should your secret lover be any different?"

Dave tried to control his temper. "That is uncalled for, Prentiss. If you want to discuss the reason I am backing out of the embassy ball, fine, I will talk about that. But don't you dare bring my ex-wives into this because you feel the need to wound me."

"This is about your ex-wives Dave and how you feel the need to shut down whenever you think you've been handed an ultimatum. Wanting to hear 'I love you' is not an unreasonable request. In fact, it's pretty normal."

"I know."

"Then why? I mean for a guy who had no problem sleeping with the entire female population at the FBI, you are doing everything in your power to keep me your best kept secret."

"No, I'm not," Dave growled.

Emily's tone softened. "Yes, you are Dave. We don't go out unless it's somewhere no one will recognize us. Hell, I know more people in that tiny town near your cabin than I do here at Quantico. I admire your professionalism at work, but I think you're carrying it over into our personal life."

Dave stepped forward and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Emily, I'm not ashamed of you; what I feel for you is different than anything I've ever experienced with any woman."

"Do you love me?" Emily's eyes searched his for the truth.

Dave thought long and hard. No matter what he said, it wasn't going to be right and it wasn't going to be enough. Moreover, there was still a chance the vase could come at his head.

"What I feel is different…" he repeated.

"You already said that; it's a simple yes or no."

"I love being with you, and I love spending time with you."

"But…" Emily prompted.

"It may not be wise to push me. I'm being honest with you Em. This is the best I can offer right now."

Emily swallowed and bit her lip. "Will you reschedule your book signing date and go to the embassy ball with me?"

"I can't."

"You won't." Em's tone rose along with her temper.

"Don't start this over; we were so close."

Emily took a deep breath and stared hard into his eyes. "You're right; I'm not going to start over. I'm done. I'm through. I'm finished with this relationship, and all the lying, sneaking around under the cover of darkness, holding my breath wondering if we are going to be found out."

"Emily…"

"Don't 'Emily' me!" she spat. "You know what you're problem is, Dave? You think you can do it all and you don't need any one. Well, you're wrong. We all need someone. Even if it's just to be told that you're doing something right." Stepping back from his touch, she watched his body language. "Maybe you can handle being lonely for the rest of your life, but I can't."

"You're angry because I won't marry you."

Emily gave a short laugh full of sarcasm. "No Dave, that's not it. And if you don't understand, then nothing I say is going to make you understand. Someday you're going to miss me. Someday…" she stopped and pulled in a shuddered breath. "Someday, you're going to need me and I won't be there. And I feel sorry for you." Emily closed her eyes. A single tear slipped down her cheek, but she refused to wipe it away. She wouldn't give him that satisfaction.

Dave watched her. He was torn. A part of him wanted to reach out and tell her what she needed to hear, but the other part of him knew that it was just empty words. In time, they would be right back here having this conversation all over again.

"What do you want me to say? Don't leave me? We can work this out?" He paused. "Those three words?"

Emily shook her head. "No. I don't want to see you beg because your ego's been wounded and you want to make me feel better so you can feel better. There are a lot of words to describe you but please don't make me add 'pathetic' to the list. "

"Emily…" He reached out to touch her. She jerked back suddenly which caused the vase to slip from her hands. The sound of the porcelain shattering filled the air. Neither person spoke.

Choking back tears, Emily rushed for the front door. She had to get out of there and fast.

"If you leave, don't come back," Dave spoke up.

Emily's hand paused on the door handle. "Don't hold your breath." She opened the door and slammed it behind her.

Dave stood in the empty room for a long time. Looking down at the broken vase, he stepped back and walked over the wet bar. Opening the bottle of scotch, he poured himself a generous portion. Picking up the glass, he brought it to his lips, and that was when he noticed his hands were shaking.

In the haunting silence, it dawned on him that he and Emily were supposed to go get their first Christmas tree together tomorrow.

"Merry fucking Christmas," he muttered and threw the drink back. Grabbing the bottle, he took it over to the couch and proceeded to get drunk.
****

Lying in her bed, Emily rolled over and hugged her pillow. She had been home for nearly four hours, but she was no closer to understanding what had transpired earlier.

She had been upset that Dave took on additional book signing dates that cut into her plans for them to attend the annual embassy Christmas Ball. It wasn't so much that he didn't want to go- to be honest neither did she- but it was how he went about not telling her.

Pulling the covers higher, she sighed and closed her eyes against the tears threatening to break free. "Come on Em, you know that isn't what is bugging you. He can't say those three little words. You wouldn't mind being David Rossi's secret if he would just tell you how he really feels."

Her chest hurt painfully from holding back the tears. "But he won't. He doesn't love you. The only person he loves is himself and honestly, how can you compete with that?"

A tear slipped out from under her lashes. "Maybe it was best you never told anyone that you were having an affair with the FBI Lothario. Less questions to answer that way. And less attention. You're better off without him."

As she agreed with her mind's rational, it dawned on her that she and Dave were supposed to get their first Christmas tree together tomorrow.

Burying her face in the feather pillow, Em sobbed her heart out.