Part of Rita's Four Seasons fic for the lovely anon that requested it! Written with totti10 (flashingbluelight), RidiculouslyOverObsessed, and read-a-holic17 (casualtyfan)
We all hope you guys enjoy reading this as much as we loved writing it. Would love to hear your thoughts!
A, G, T, & M XxX
Here is Spring, this takes place a couple of years after Winter...
Chapter 1
The soft glow of the sunlight beamed through the thin white curtains as it landed on the small woman who lay in the crisp, white bed peacefully. Outside, the songs of birds played as they flew through the morning air. A gentle breeze swam into the room and caused Rita to pull her legs up under the warm blanket.
She carefully opened her eyes, her sight still foggy from her slumber. She blinked a few times before lifting herself so that she was now sat up in the bed. Running her hands through her short, blonde hair she pulled back the covers and walked over to the window. She smiled to herself as she watched two rabbits playing in the daffodils on the other side of the street.
She felt a sigh of relief escaping her as she remembered that she was safe and Mark could no longer hurt her. She had finally pulled away from his grasp, she was finally free. Rita had moved to Holby a couple of months ago, she wanted to get away from her old life, her old friends who she knew would be disappointed in her for not coming out about it sooner. It only occurred to her in that moment that she hadn't actually told anyone about what had happened. She was too ashamed and she was in such a rush to leave that town, with all those ghosts haunting her, she never got round to it. She hadn't even told her parents the full extent of what had happened, just that they had split up. Rita couldn't deal with the 'I told you so' if she ever exposed that Mark abused her and all the other stuff that happened. Instead, she lied and told them that he was having an affair, at least that part was true.
Pushing herself off the window sill, she leaned across her bed and picked up her dressing gown. She wrapped it tightly around herself and started to make her way downstairs. The sickly, sweet smell of coffee danced under her nose waking her up just that little bit more. She chuckled to herself as she could hear the faint sound of the crackling radio and a low voice singing along to it. She walked through into the kitchen and watched the dark haired man dancing around on the tiles; she couldn't supress the grin that was growing on her face.
Rita must've stood in the doorway for a good five minutes before he realised that he was being observed. His whole face blushing a bright red as he tried to hide it by turning to the pan to finish cooking off their breakfast.
"I didn't know you were the sort of person to dance and sing to the radio," Rita winked, pulling back a chair so that she could sit down.
"Well, I'm full of surprises me. You never know what's around that corner," he replied as he arranged their meal delicately on their plate and setting it down in front of Rita.
"Aw this is lovely Iain, thank you," she paused for a moment. "But, I thought it was my turn to make the breakfast? You cooked yesterday as well."
"You were asleep and I didn't want to wake you, so I thought I might as well make us both breakfast and coffee, it's no problem honestly. I like cooking for you," Iain explained, placing his own plate opposite hers and sitting down on his chair.
"You could've just woke me up," Rita slurped at her coffee. "I wouldn't have minded."
"We all know that isn't true," Iain laughed, resulting in a light kick from Rita under the table.
They continued to eat their breakfast in a comfortable silence. Rita really enjoyed their mornings together before they would have to rush off to work. She had only known Iain for a couple of months and only lived with him for even less than that but she felt safe with him. They hit it off almost straight away, it had been Rita's first day as a nurse in Holy City Hospital and Iain had been a paramedic there for a couple of years now. He was the first person she had met, given the fact that one of her neighbours had been involved in accident and she couldn't leave her. Rita had stayed in the back of the ambulance with her neighbour and Iain who had kept taking any opportunity to flirt with her but his partner, Dixie, kept telling him off so he soon stopped. She just smiled to herself for the rest of the journey; she wasn't used to having someone flirt with her. Only someone who told her what she could and couldn't do. Her and Mark had been together since they were teenagers and stayed together until it ended, so she had never really been in this situation before and she had never been with another man who wasn't Mark before.
When Iain found out that Rita was going to be working in the hospital he asked her out for a drink in the pub after work almost instantly. At first, Rita said no, the thought of going to a pub after all her past issues with alcohol scared her. She knew that she was no longer being controlled by Mark and that she was allowed to have a drink with her mates but she also knew that if she drank too much she'd end up regretting it. She knew that drink made her do stupid things. But, after a little persuasion from the rest of the staff on the shift she finally came round to the idea, although, she decided she would keep to orange juice, just to be on the safe side.
Rita stuck by Iain for the majority of the night, there was something about him that made her relax and she felt quite comfortable in his presence. But, she held back from his advances, she came to Holby to get away and start fresh, she needed to be completely clear from Mark before even thinking about someone else. She appreciated that when she said no, he respected her. She was very attracted to him of course and she was sure that he was attracted to her as well but Rita knew that it was too soon. As the night continued there was not one moment when Rita and Iain's conversation lulled, she had learned a lot about him. He used to be in the army but then he became a paramedic after an accident out in Afghanistan. However, Iain didn't really learn much about Rita, every question he had asked she wormed her way out of answering it and would change the subject. But, he did learn that she had been living with her mother and father for the past few months and he had a room spare so decided to offer it to her.
Now here she was, sat at a kitchen table, eating toast egg and bacon with her best friend; the best friend who she falls in love with even more every day.
Rita sighed as she closed the front door behind her. Normally she waits for Iain after work if they were on the same shift but for some reason had to be kept behind for an hour and he didn't seem too pleased about it. She decided that is was probably best going home to start the tea as knowing Iain that hour would end up being two hours and Rita didn't fancy waiting in the rain for him.
She walked through into the living room where she slumped into the sofa, letting her body relax after her tense day. Her eyes wandered over to the window where the rain was splashing hard against the glass. She couldn't believe it, it was spring and the clouds were a deep dark grey. Rita thought the weather would have been much better than this considering how beautiful the sky looked this morning. She could feel her eyes getting heavier as she started to follow the droplets as they trickled down the window. Before she knew it she had drifted off to sleep.
An hour later Rita sprang from the sofa as she heard the front door slam harshly. She could hear Iain's voice, it was filled with anger but she couldn't work out what he was saying. Bracing herself, she followed Iain into the kitchen where he had begun to open and close the cupboards with so much force she thought that they would fall off their hinges.
"Iain? Is everything all right?" Rita spoke softly, not wanting to startle him.
"Why isn't there any food in this house?" He shouted, shooting a look in Rita's direction who had now frozen still on the spot.
Rita couldn't move; there were tears forming in her eyes as she stared out into the distance. Her chest was tightening and she could feel his hands grabbing at her skin; Marks hands. Images flashed through her mind. She was there again. Back in that house. She was being pushed up against the cupboards, each piece of her clothing being ripped off her. She could hear his voice, his deep retched voice that made skin crawl. She felt sick. She thought she was free. That she had got away from him. But he was still haunting her.
She snapped out of her living nightmare as she felt Iain's hands on her, she instantly pulled away from him and she could feel her breath being snatched away from her; the tears that had sat in the wells of her eyes, finally falling down her cheeks. She turned away from him; she didn't want him to see her like this. She felt embarrassed, she felt naked and exposed. Her arms were now hugging her body as though she was trying to hide every inch of it from Iain. She wanted to run but she couldn't move; her feet were the stuck to the floor.
"Rita?" Iain whispered. "I'm sorry I shouted; I shouldn't have taken my anger out on you. I'm sorry. Please, Reets, just say something." He stepped closer to her and held his hands out to her but she moved away from him again.
"Don't touch me," she spat. "Don't touch me," she repeated, each time getting quieter until she began to weep.
"I'll make us a cup of tea, yeah?" Iain offered, backing away from her and turning to the kettle. He watched her from the corner of his eye, she still hadn't moved but after a couple of minutes she began to relax slightly and she had calmed herself down.
When he had finished making the tea he set the cups down on the table and sat on one of the chairs. He placed the other cup by the other chair and signalled to Rita to sit down.
Rita looked up from where she was stood, her arms were still wrapped around her tightly but when she seen that Iain was sitting down, she decided to join him. She slowly approached the chair and perched herself on the edge of the seat so that if she needed to run it would be easier for her to get out.
They sat in silence for a couple of minutes, Iain occasionally taking gulps of tea, Rita's was still full to the brim and was now stone cold. Iain began to fiddle with his fingers; he didn't want to leave Rita on her own, not after what just happened, however much it baffled him.
"Rita," he began, breaking the dead air. "You can talk to me, you know? About anything, I'm not going to judge you."
Rita continued to look down at the light brown wooden table, she couldn't face Iain. She couldn't look him in the eye and tell him everything was fine. There was no way of getting out of this question; she had done so well over the past few months; making sure that she was on her own before letting the warm tears fall from her eyes, or avoiding any question about her past by changing the subject or offering to make someone a drink. But, now she had messed up, she had exposed herself and now she couldn't lie. She would have to tell Iain everything. She was going to have to face up to what she did. Everyone told her to stay away from Mark but she didn't listen, she was too blind to see the truth. She was ashamed of herself for ever believing in him, for trusting him, for sleeping with him. She couldn't believe that she had wasted the past twenty years of her life loving someone who treated her like dirt.
"Okay," Iain sighed. "Another time, you tell me when you're ready." He stood from his chair and took away the two mugs. He took them over to the sink, pouring Rita's down the drain and then leaving them to rest.
"Iain," Rita let out so quietly Iain thought he had imagined it. "There's something I need to tell you."
"Right," Iain joined her at the table once again.
"You can't tell anyone, do you promise?" Rita finally looked up at Iain who had nodded at her. "Before I moved to Holby, I had a husband. I had friends. But, I messed up, I. I shouldn't be here. I should've listened to my family; they told me that he was going to hurt me; that he was going to ruin my life. I didn't listen to them, I was young and naïve and I was in love. I never thought that any of this would happen. That I would end up covered in bruises every night, that he'd use my body for his own pleasure. I should've seen it sooner. I should've got away sooner and then I wouldn't be in this mess. I could've had a family, a man who loved me and adored me. I could've had a child who would run around my house and they'd cry and whine all the time but I wouldn't care because I'd love it with all my heart. But, now I can't have that because I decided to stay with him because I loved him." Rita broke down, her hands clutching at her head out of frustration.
Iain didn't know what to say, he wanted to hug her, but he didn't know how she'd react, he didn't want to scare her again.
"Can I?" he paused. "Can I hug you?"
Rita nodded; Iain walked round to the other side of the table and took hold of Rita in his arms; holding her close to him as she sobbed into his chest. He traced circles on her back trying to calm her down. He couldn't believe that she had been carrying this secret around with her for so long, if there was something; and there certainly was a lot of things, he liked about Rita was how strong she was. He definitely admired her for that.
A couple of minutes had passed, Rita was still clinging onto Iain's shirt but she had calmed herself down and now she was silent, listening to the repetitive beat in his chest which soothed her along with the comforting smell of Iain's aftershave.
"Have you told anyone else about this?" Iain asked.
Rita pulled away from his chest so that she could look up to him, she shook her head, "No, just you. I don't think I could face the embarrassment if anyone else knew. Or my family telling me that they were right and I should've listened to them. I already feel stupid enough without them emphasising it."
"Okay," Iain nodded. "How about, I run you a bath and then whilst you're in the bath, I can make us dinner and afterwards I'll stick on a film, your choice."
Rita smiled softly to herself, "Sounds like a plan."
Iain gently pressed his lips onto her forehead, his hands cupping her face. He then took her hand in his and guided her up the stairs where he filled the bath with hot water and used one of her favourite bath bombs so that the water had turned a bright pink and there were little roses floating on the surface. Just as Iain had finished up Rita had entered the room, a towel wrapped around her. Iain had to stop himself from looking but he couldn't resist, she was so beautiful, even if she had mascara marks running down her face and even if her hair was all messy. He could feel his heart racing. He wanted to kiss her there and then; he wanted to tell her that he loved her and that everything was going to be alright. But he couldn't, he didn't want to take advantage of her, not now that he had learned that she had been abused. Instead he took a deep breath and went to leave the room but stopped when she called his name. He turned to look at her.
"Yeah?" he spoke.
"Why were you angry earlier?" she asked.
He shook his head, "It's fine, it was just me being stupid that's all."
"No, tell me."
"Dixie is leaving and they have found a replacement for her straight away, he'll be starting in a couple of weeks," Iain sighed. "I shouldn't have got so worked up about it I know but I've known Dix for years and I was the last person to find out that she was going to be moving to Cornwall."
"That's awful," Rita frowned, reaching out rub his arm with her thumb lightly. "I'm sorry."
"There's nothing to be sorry for, now go on, relax," Iain pointed at the bath. "You deserve to."
Once again, Iain went to leave but as he was closing the door behind him he noticed a scar that ran across the top of Rita's back. He furrowed his brow as he thought of it, maybe her husband had done it, and not wanting to question her just now he shut the door behind him and continued down the stairs.
About an hour later Rita had appeared downstairs once again and had joined Iain in the kitchen cooking away whilst she dried her short blonde locks with her towel. Iain watched her in the corner of his eye, just like he had done a couple of hours ago.
"I need to ask you about something," he spoke out, grabbing her attention.
"Okay…" she replied nervously.
"Why have you got a scar on your back?" he asked directly.
Rita's face dropped as she was being reminded of that day, "It's, it's nothing."
Iain faced her, "Come on, you can tell me, was it your husband?"
She turned her head away from Iain so that she didn't have to look at him, "There was a car accident. He was driving; I was in the passenger seat. A lorry swerved and hit his side of the car. I got out with just a scar on my back. He, he barely got out. I nearly killed my husband."
Iain's eyes wandered down to the floor but then back up to meet hers, "But how? You shouldn't feel guilty, it was accident, the lorry went into your car."
"I was arguing with him and I told him to stop the car so that I could get out," she chewed at her bottom lip. "I should've seen the lorry coming towards us, I should've told him to move the car but I didn't. So it's my fault."
"He abused you Rita, if anything he got what he deserved," Iain said sternly.
"But it made things worse he blamed me for everything. He just became so distant with me and that's when the abuse started. He made sure I suffered like he did, I don't blame him, I was only getting what I deserved," she could feel herself welling up again.
"It wasn't your fault Rita! These things happen, you know that as much as I do. You didn't deserve his abuse. But I have to ask, where is he now? How did you get away?" Iain asked softly trying not to make it seem as though he was questioning her.
Rita avoided his eye again, she didn't want to tell him but he asked and he knew most of what happened, so why lie? "He's, erm, he's in prison. Not because of what he did to me but, he had a sexual relationship with his pupil but I don't want to talk about it, if you don't mind."
"Right, well, our food's ready anyway so," Iain nodded awkwardly, turning around to dish up the food.
They spent the rest of the night with Rita snuggled into Iain's side whilst they watched films together. They had become so comfortable in each other's presence that they hadn't actually realised how close they were until they had looked at the time and realised that they should probably go to bed. After a few awkward movements and glances they both made their way upstairs and into their separate bedrooms.
Rita couldn't get to sleep at all; she just lay there, looking up at the ceiling. She kept thinking about Iain, which surprised her, for the past couple of months the reason she couldn't get to sleep was because Mark had been on her mind but now this was different. Had she fallen for Iain? She loved him dearly and was always grateful for everything that he had done for her but she always considered their friendship as platonic, until now. And with everything that happened tonight, she really was beginning to see Iain in a different light.
