CHAPTER ONE

"Mawat?" I whispered opening the door to my mother's chamber. She was in her bed, her breaths coming slowly but silently.

"Mawat?" I repeated. She opened her eyes and focused her gaze on me. She smiled wearily.

"Come in Meritamen," She croaked in pain. I shut the door behind me and approached her bed with caution. Sitting at her side I took her hand in mine and flinched at how cold it was. The physicians said she was sick but it looked much worse then what they described.

"Everyone is wondering how you are doing mawat," I told her. "Father asked me to check on you." I said trying to smile, but she frowned and sighed in disappointment. After a few minutes of silence I became nervous.

"Mawat please say something, please!" I begged. She sighed and stared up at the ceiling not meeting my gaze.

"I think I am dying beloved."

"W-h-a-t?" I gasped, holding my breath. "No, no, no! That's not – you can't- why would the gods doing this?" I sobbed. "You're queen!"

She sighed. "Yes but that doesn't always protect you from Anubis. Sometimes it just draws him closer."

I tried holding back my tears grasping her hand harder. "But you can't, you can't leave us!"

"But I am. Go and find your father and your siblings, they must know." She told me, but I didn't want to leave her. "Go" she spoke firmly.

I let her hand go and stood up tears rolling down my cheeks.

I RAN as fast as I could through the halls of Pi-Ramesses, my breaths came heavily and beads of sweat ran down from my forehead. I was blinded be my tears and all I could think was why?

Why would the gods turn their backs on my mother? She had done so many amazing things as queen! She had banned the heretics from Egypt, and had gone to so many wars with my father. The first was a little after she had given birth to my eldest brothers.

Warrior queen was what they call her now and that would be the last she would hear of their cheers.

"Father!" I shouted as I ran into the Audience Chamber. Everyone turned their heads to face me, and I could tell that I had just interrupted a meeting.

Meryre and Prehir sat in their seats with Nebettawy seated at the end.

Pharaoh Amunher sat next to my father on the dais in one of the ebony thrones, the empty one was my mothers and I held my breath.

Amunher was seventeen like his twin brother Prehir. Meryre was fifteen and Nebettawy was only twelve, Meryatum was five, and I was thirteen. Thirteen years of memories was all I would have of my mother, and I felt jealous of my eldest siblings.

My father looked down on my from the dais, a stern look on his face.

"Meritamen this better be important. There is a crisis that needs to be dealt with and I…"

"Mother is dying!" I shouted over his complaint. Everyone froze and my fathers face turned pale.

"Nefertari," He gasped, and he was down the dais and out of the chamber before anyone could react.

Amuher rushed to my side and grabbed my hand pulling me along with Prehir and Meryre behind, holding Nebettawy's hands.

We rushed to our mother's chamber and made it in time to watch her draw her last breath, my father at her side.

He squeezed her hand and stood up, tears rolling down his cheeks. I ran to her side grasping her hand and begging the gods to make it warm.

"Let her go Meritamen," my father whispered quietly, making his way out the door. I grasped her harder refusing his order. Why did they take her away? Who was going to hold me when I was sad? Who was going to sing the hymns of Amun? I couldn't bear to let go but it didn't matter he had already vanished out the door.

I sat like that for who knows how long and continued to sob. Then I felt Amunher try to pry me from or mother's dead body but I refused until Prehir came and helped him.

"Let go of me!" I shrieked as they wrestled me into the hallway.

"Calm down Meritamen. Please," Amunher begged pushing me up against the wall to hold me still.

"Calm down! Calm down!" I screamed, "How can you say that when our mother has just died!" He flinched, looking hurt but it was Prehir who spoke firmly and gently.

"Please Meritamen. Mother never liked it when you were upset, and she wouldn't like it that you were sad because of her."

I tried to stop crying but I couldn't. They both pulled me close until my violent sobs ended and my tears subsided.

When I looked up I saw Meryre, and Nebettawy join us, both their faces stained red from crying. We were all so young and now motherless. It will be all I will remember for the rest of my life, I thought.

Amunher helped me up and supported me as we entered the Audience Chamber.

Everyone watched us come in and held their tongues as we passed. Some gave their condemns and told us what an amazing person she was and of all the brilliant things she had done.

But they didn't need to tell me I already knew.

LATER I sat in the gardens to get away from the overwhelming truth. It was a silent place to be when I was sad and needed to think.

I have heard that my grandmother enjoyed sitting out in the garden.

"We our terribly sorry about your mother Meritamen." Said a voice from behind. I turned to see Ramessu and his younger brother Khaemwaset who was my age. Both their faces were grave and I could tell that he meant it.

"Your mother was like a mother to us." Khaemwaset said softly. "And we miss her too."

I nodded my thanks and turned back to admiring the blossom petals that lay on the water of the gardens pond. Ramessu began to walk away, but Khaemwaset stayed by me.

"Aren't you coming?" Ramessu ask his brother. I looked up to see Khaemwaset shake his head.

"I think I will stay here," he told him.

Ramessu smiled as if he was on some private joke and left. Leaving the two of us alone in the gardens.

Khaemwaset sat down next to me and was silent, staring out at nothing.

It was weird sitting next to my mother's rival's son. He was a boy but I was a girl which I thought would have been a disappointment to my mother but she had always told me.

"The day the gods gave you to me was the greatest blessing in the world"

And I still believe her because when ever she said it there was a bright twinkle of light in her eyes that couldn't have been described in words.

I shivered at the thought of her cold body placed in a sarcophagus and her green cat eyes buried from me forever.

Out of all the children I had been the one to inherit my mother's eyes and she told me that I looked better with them then she did. I had to then tell her that she was just as beautiful as I was and then she would smile and we would walk in the halls and tell our secrets that the day had brought us.

But that was over and there would be no more of that. Maybe I could do it with father but it was unlikely that he would have the time my mother had.

Tears trickled down my cheek, but were quickly brushed away by my hand before Khaemwaset noticed.

"I feel like I've lost my mother," Khaemwaset sighed letting loose his thoughts.

"But your mothers alive and healthy," I pointed out.

"That's true, but still…" he said deep in thought.

It was true; his mother Iset was perfectly fine. She was alive and healthy, unlike my mother.

My mother and Iset had competed to be queen but it was my mother who prevailed.

She told me how hard it was to get the peoples approval. But soon was given her new title "Warrior queen."

She had gained the peoples respect by going to war with my father against pirates and the Hitties. Both of them were heroic deeds.

My favorite was the war against the Hitties. My mother rode in front with my father on the chariots and camped outside of Kadash.

She saved my father and so many men from dying in a trap by sending in reinforcements.

Now they would call her warrior queen into eternity.

"I didn't even get to say goodbye," I croaked tears pouring down my cheeks.

"I'm so sorry Meri," he said putting his arm over my shoulder. I thought I would have flinched at his touch but I didn't. He was trying to comfort me.

"Thank you," I said beaming up at him, and he smiled down at me.

"Khaemwaset." Came a sharp voice. Khaemwaset froze next to me and had a distressed look on his face. He quickly removed his arm.

Oh gods no! I thought.

Bintanath, Iset's oldest daughter walked into the garden scowling at me then turning a disapproving look on her brother.

"What are you doing?" She demanded of him. Khaemwaset looked down at his feet, and shifted uncomfortably. I could tell that he didn't like to disappoint his sister. I spoke up to get her attention away from him.

"We were just talking about my mother," I told her.

"Yes, may Anubis curse her soul," she said smiling cruelly.

I saw Khaemwaset's fists clench and he spoke darkly.

"I don't think that Meritamen would speak of our mother that way!"

"You don't know that though," she snapped at him. I stood there, too scared to say anything. I didn't want to know what was going to happen and I didn't want to say something that I would regret.

"Yes I do, because she is a better princess then you'll ever be," he muttered. Her eyes widened and her nostrils flared.

"How dare you!" She hissed. "Take it back!"

But Khaemwaset stood his ground and looked her in the eye.

"No," he said

"Excuse me?" Bintanath said baffled. I couldn't believe it either.

"I said no, no I won't take it back."

She scowled at him then at me.

"Well if I am not as good as you," she hissed. "Then I guess I can do this."

She pushed her hands against my shoulders so hard that I stumbled and fell into the pond.

I sat up soaking wet, and my knees and hands bleeding from the impact of the rocks below.

Khaemwaset stood there in shock. He stepped forward and held out a hand to help me up but Bintanath swatted it away.

"Let the princess take care of herself, she is not of our concern." She sneered. Khaemwaset looked at her as if she was joking.

"But she's hurt." He said studying my cuts with concern.

"I don't care!" Bintanath said throwing her arms up. "But I wonder how mother will feel when she finds out that you were hanging out with that." Bintanath said pointing to me with a look of disgust. "That"? Was that how I was seen now? As not a royal princess but an unimportant orphan. Khaemwaset's face paled and he looked at me with troublesome eyes.

"I'm sorry Bintanath, but please don't tell mother." He said scared of his mother's wrath.

"Then GO!" She barked. He looked at me sadly then walked out of the gardens. When he was out of sight Bintanath turned her fiery gaze upon me. I held back my tears not giving her the satisfaction.

"Did you know that my mother is to be made the new queen?" Bintanath asked in a bragging tone. I paled and she gave me a smirk.

"Isn't it just wonderful?" Bintanath continued. "Your mother dies and now my mother is taking her rightful place as queen."

"That may be so," I said firmly locking onto her gaze. "But our father will never love your mother as much as he loved mine."

She glared at me and stomped off. Probably to go tell her mother of what I had said. She was Iset's little spy, always telling Iset of the gossip traveling around the palace. It was then that I remembered my injury and the pain quickly came to my attention. I was alone. I was all alone. I began to cry but no sound escaped my lips.

I stood up, my knees aching and blood flowing down my legs. I moaned as I headed out of the garden and through the palace halls. I made it to my chamber in a heap of pain.

"My lady what happened?" Gasped my nurse as I walked in. I shook my head in denial of what had just happened to me.

"I don't want to talk about it." I half sobbed, my lip trembling. She looked to the ground where a large puddle of water had formed from my dripping sheath.

Soon we both found interest in staring at my bruised body. My knees were bleeding and had about a dozen scraps on them, as did my hands. The bleeding began to slow down and I felt the cuts start to sting.

"Ow!" I yelped holding back my tears. There was then a knock on the door and my nurse rushed to get it.

"Your highness." She said bowing as Amunher walked into the room.

"Meritamen father wants-," he began and then paused when his eyes lingered to my wounds.

"What happened?" He asked quietly taking in the blood. I didn't answer mostly because I was at a loss for words. "What happened? Meritamen tell me." He begged. I sighed and told him about my alone time in the garden and talking to Khaemwaset and then finally being pushed into the pond by Bintanath. When I finished he held a dark expression that made me shudder.

"Wait here," He commanded and he stormed out of my chamber.

"He better not make trouble." I sighed. My nurse threw me a surprised look.

"Of course he's going to my lady." She said. "She hurt you and that is no way a princess of Egypt should act."

I sighed again and she gave me a whole hearted smile.

"Come my lady, let's get you cleaned up."

I left my chamber when the sun was setting. My nurse had been cleaning me and preparing me for the rest of the afternoon. She had me rest after all the pampering. I was deeply worried of what I would face once I reached the Great Hall.

When a pair of golden doors came into view, I felt the circlet (Egyptian crown) on my forehead grow heaver.

"Princess Meritamen, daughter of Pharaoh Ramesses II." The herald announced.

I walked toward the dais and took my seat between Meryre and Nebettawy. My father gave Bintanath a look and she stood up from her seat and walked over to me.

"I am sorry for hurting you and for not acting like the princess I should be." She said bitterly, and said it as though she was reading off a piece of papyrus.

"I forgive you," I said blood rushing to my cheeks once I noticed the whole court was staring at us. When she sat back down I threw a scornful look at Amunher who avoided my gaze.

"Did you hear?" Meryre asked Nebettawy and I.

"Hear about what?" Nebettawy asked her brow puckering at Meryre's tone.

"That Iset is being made queen of Egypt!" He whispered. Nebettawy gasped and I sighed.

"It was expected," I told them unsurprised by the news.

"But Iset will make our lives terrible!" Meryre exclaimed.

"Then we will just have to live through it." I snapped at him. I never did that before.

"Meri, where is mawat?" Asked Meryatum coming to my side. I looked at my brother and sister and they both avoided my gaze. I looked back down at my baby brother and sat him in my lap.

"Mother has gone to the afterlife to see some of her family." I told him.

"But she will come back won't she Meri? Won't she?" He asked tears welling up in his eyes. I sucked in a deep breath this was so hard.

"No Meryatum, no she won't be coming back." I sighed. He looked like he was about to cry but wiped away the soft tears he began to spill and looked me straight in the eye.

"Then will you be my mawat?" He asked but his tone was approaching to a beg. I nodded and held him close.

"I love you mawat," He whispered and I choked back a sob as tears ran down my face. How did everything go so wrong mawat?