The Bearheart Chronicles – Gillaen's Dilemma
I held her close to me. For once neither of us were wearing our armour, I wore a loose shirt and simple cloth trousers, she wore an elegant silk gown she'd acquired from somewhere, so I could feel every beat of her heart, every breath. She looked up at me, her icy blue eyes meeting mine as she smiled.
My hand was behind her neck, my fingers tangled in her soft red hair. My breath caught in my throat as I whispered her name, "Nerissina."
Before she could speak I bowed my head and pressed my lips against hers in a passionate kiss.
For so many years I'd wanted this, both in life and undeath I'd wanted her, needed her.
In life I'd watched her choose my brother and had concealed my broken heart behind my banter. When she'd become worgen I'd believed her lost to us both and had still kept my silence. Then she and I had died and my memories had been lost in my service to the Scourge. But even then we'd been close, fighting side by side in obedience to our dread master, sharing our lust for killing, for cruelty and torment.
And when we'd been freed from that servitude we'd stayed together. More than once in battle we'd had need to raise each other from a second death. There was never any question that we wouldn't do it. We were bound together in life and undeath by the love we shared for Arrentai and the need to survive for his sake. He was the glue that kept us together, the reason for wanting to survive.
But now…
Arrentai had his own life with Lizabetha, his own family. He didn't need us in the way that we needed him, needed each other.
Even then we'd held back from that final commitment. I was afraid, more afraid than I'd been facing the worst of demons or monsters. I hadn't slept with a woman since my brief, ill-fated affair with Kaeti back in Lordaeron. Now… I didn't know if I could. Was there enough life left in my undead body that it would answer to my desires. I wanted to know, but at the same time I was so afraid to find out the truth, afraid that my failings would drive Nerissina away. The only thing to give me hope was the memory of the faint stirrings of desire I felt as I held her in the dark silence of the night. But was it enough?
Nerissina reached up a hand and gently stroked it down the side of my face, her touch light and teasing.
"You'll never know if you don't try," she whispered.
Oh Light! Could she see all my deepest fears?
I trembled as she ran her fingers down my chest, stopping at the waistband of my trousers. I couldn't speak or move. Utterly submissive I let her take my hand and lead me to our bedroom.
