Vala Thinks Too Much
Childofspacegypsy1
Synopsis: Missing Scene, Ark of Truth. Vala's thoughts shortly after AOT. WARNING: -Minor spoilers
"I don't know exactly where my place is, but I hope it's here."
That's what she had told Tomin. And it was true. While she had no troubles about whether or not she was part of the SGC or SG1, a girl needs more in her life. She thought back on this last adventure. What had changed? Well nothing really. It had just felt different, to her. Like how when Tomin had called her his wife, she was the only person who seemed disturbed by that. And yet when Daniel had walked into the cell as she sat leaning into Tomin why had she felt "caught'? And what was that grin about?
It's hard to explain exactly what this relationship with Daniel is. He's my friend, best friend. He knows me like no one else does, because as much as I drive him nuts, and do things he hates, he puts forth the effort to know me. He cares about me and wants me to do well. That's always made me a bit nervous, and probably accounts for a lot of why he's my main target. That and he makes it SO easy. And I really cared about him. He's a good and kind man.
But what is this new feeling? I mean, really, I've always been honestly attracted to the man, but I find a lot of men attractive (though he definitely has the lead by a far stretch!). I've never really even tried to think of him in a 'romantic' way. I mean, I tease him about it, but only because it's safe to. Because when Daniel decides to feel again - and I really hope he does, because he deserves to - that it would be a loving, kind and fantastic girl. I've never even thought about it in terms of 'not me'. Honestly I never thought about that girl being me. Ok, well, I've often wondered what it would be like to have someone like Daniel love me, but I could never trust myself with someone that wonderful. Especially since he deserves to never feel hurt in that department again
But now she felt different when she saw him, like she was seeing him through new eyes. Instead of an annoying and annoy-able step-brother, he was a best friend you had a crush on. Like you've known him all your life and he knew all your secrets and then one day you look up and see something else… something you want. But was he experiencing the same changes? He was not really acting differently, just less guarded. Like he could finally let himself take her jokes for what they were. Jokes. But was it really him opening up for her? Was he seeing her differently? Or was he just finally deciding she was going to stick around and be a productive part of this team and she was reading something else into it?
Crap. Since when do I over think my feelings? What happened to acting without thinking? HHmmm.
