Jack is lonely and miserable this Christmas while Carter is on Atlantis until he gets a surprise visitor. Guess who it is?

This story is dedicated to Alimoo who has been kind enough to bandy about a number of ideas on various of my stories and is a delightful friend.

Disclaimer: I don't own, or profit from, these characters or franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Now this just sucked! Here it was Christmas morning and Major General Jack O'Neill was miserable. Not only miserable, but alone. Now how fucked up is that on the holidays? Daniel and the rest of SG-1 were on a planet in the Pegasus Galaxy working on a find that may allow the development of their own ZPM's, and Carter was on Atlantis in command of the whole city and expedition. That one really sucked. They'd been a couple from the moment that the war with the Ori was over, and if truth be told they'd been a couple from the first days he'd been in DC taking over Homeworld Security from George. They'd had a talk and committed to each other, but up to now no sex had taken place. As if the first eight years hadn't been bad enough, now here it was two and a half years into said relationship and he still hadn't gotten into Carters pants. Now how pathetic was that??? Even that freaking pissant Shanahan had gotten some pretty soon in the relationship that still wanted to make Jack lose his lunch just thinking about. Was he doing something wrong? Did he have bad breath? Did the little extra padding in his gut from pushing paper turn her off somehow? He made a mental note to get back to the 500 crunches a day he used to do when he was in the field. A little pain and suffering was worth it if Carter was the prize, after all.

That about summed up the situation for Jack O'Neill as he paraded around in his favorite Homer Simpson boxer shorts and Santa hat. His special order Christmas edition Homer Simpson fan club t-shirt was also on his frame. He didn't know why he'd even gotten out of bed this morning. He was just going through the motions. He'd tried to watch his favorite parade, but found that pretty lame, and then he'd popped in a Simpson's DVD that had several of their Christmas episodes and even that failed to capture his attention. Looking out the window at the falling snow, he saw the snowman he'd built the other day. It had remained cold enough that it hadn't melted yet, and it represented the only fun he'd had this entire Christmas season.

"I'm sorry, Jack, but we need you here over the holidays this year," the President had said a week before when Jack had been planning on taking two weeks off and surprising Carter on Atlantis.

That, of course, had been received with an audible thud as Jack had dropped the paperweight he'd been fiddling with in the Oval Office when he'd been told the news. Since then, naturally since the Gods definitely hated one Jack O'Neill, nothing at all requiring his attention had crossed his desk. Instead he'd been working on requisition statements for two years hence for lack of anything to do.

Just as Jack had reached the end of his sanity while thinking of all these things, and ran out of beer in the process, a brilliant white light lit up the living room he was sitting in on the couch. When it cleared, he looked over and dropped the half empty beer bottle on the floor, beer spilling everywhere. There before him stood Carter! And not only that, but she had on a Santa hat, and draped around her a floor length cape/cowl made of what looked like red velvet with white fur trim around the edges. As he looked, she smiled and let the cape drop, revealing what she had on underneath. Jack almost had a stroke right there.

"Carter?!?!?!" he managed to squeak, at the same time his cock became instantly erect.

Carter was standing there in what had to be the sexiest, and skimpiest Mrs. Clause outfit he'd ever seen. In reality it was a red velvet, with white fur trim, bustier. She also had on a red garter belt and sheer red stockings. She placed one foot on the edge of the coffee table and displayed the red panties she was wearing. His jaw clanged to the floor when he saw that her panties were crotchless! Topping it all off she was wearing red fuck me stilettos heels.

"So has Jack O'Neill be a good little boy this year?" Colonel Samantha Carter asked in a very sexy drawl. Her lips quirked into a smirk. "Or has he been a naughty little Major General this year?"

Jack blinked twice and pinched himself to see if he was dreaming. He was still here and faced with the HOTTEST woman in any universe standing right in front of him in the most awesome Christmas outfit he'd ever fantasized about.

"I've been good, I swear, Carter!" he managed to blurt out. "No looking, no touching, and a letter a week just like you said. Ask anyone. Now can I please get my present and be a naughty little boy for Christmas?" he pleaded. Pathetic, he knew, but he was horny as hell right now and the woman he'd fantasized over for the last eleven years was now here in his hot little hands, or she soon would be. He'd deny anything if that would help him get Carter as his Christmas present.

Carter just shook her head. "I don't know, O'Neill," she said with a sad tone to her voice. "I've got some rather disturbing reports on you lately."

"WHAT!?" Jack said in shock, and no small amount of outrage. He was in no mood for this bullshit, and because of that he had not caught the amused gleam in her eyes that would have tipped him off that she was shining him on. "Who the hell's been spouting lies about yours truly? I'll beat the shit out of them!"

"But General," Carter said in a sultry voice. "Don't you know that the naughty little boys get the prize, while good little boys spend the day playing in the snow?" she asked. As she said "prize" she trailed her hand down to her center, swiping a finger through her folds that were peaking through the slit in the crotchless panties she wore. She shuddered as her finger tapped her engorged clit.

Jack's eleven years near total sexual drought caused him to take very careful notice of that. It also made any semblance of masculine pride go right out the window. "I've been a very, very, very bad little boy all year," he said in a pleading voice. He could just hear Daniel laughing his ass off while commenting on how pussy whipped Jack was. At this time, though, Jack couldn't agree more, especially considering that the pussy in question was Carter's. Oh happy day!

"Then I guess you deserve your reward," Sam purred as she turned to head down the hallway to the master bedroom. "Coming, Jack?" came the question from the bedroom.

"I will be any second now at this rate," Jack muttered as he raced down the hall and entered the bedroom.

"WOW!" Jack exclaimed as he looked at the naughty vision in front of him. His hard on just got harder and he groaned in desperate need. "You're killing me, Carter," he said with a plea in his voice.

Carter was laid back on the bed, back propped up by the fluffy pillows that adorned the bed. One hand was squeezing her left breast, teasing the covered nipple as she stimulated herself, while her other hand was down between her legs playing with her pussy, the swollen lips of which were now readily apparent through the crotchless panties.

"I waited as long as I could, Jack, but I'm just so damn turned on right now, I had to take matters into my own hands," she informed him with a wicked grin. "The question is, are you going to make use of your obvious 'attributes' or are you going to make me do all the work here?"

Jack stripped off his boxers, shirt, socks, and Santa hat in record time and rushed to the bed. "I think I can be of some help, Carter," he said in a low voice. "It's time for the Master to take over here."

Carter sat up and pulled him down on the bed, kissing him full on, letting her tongue duel with his. "Master, huh?" she teased. "I think I need to reconnoiter the terrain here and see what the Master really has to work with," she said in a sexy purr.

"Be my guest," Jack sat back and put his arms behind his head. "Just don't hurt me too bad. I don't handle pain well."

Carter laughed. "I know just how to handle guys like you," she told him as she grabbed his cock and stroked him a few times. Lowering her head, she did something she'd been dreaming of for as long as she'd known him. She took him in her mouth and began to bob her head, letting her tongue swirl around his hard shaft. Suddenly, though, without any warning, Jack came. She swallowed rapidly, trying not to choke. Once she had finished she looked up with a questioning look on her face. She saw Jack there with a horrified and embarrassed look on his face. "Hair trigger, Jack?" she asked as she chuckled. "Anything you need to let your lab partner in on?"

Jack was mortified. Not even fifteen seconds into what was guaranteed to be an incredible blowjob from Carter, if the first few seconds were any indication, and he'd let loose. Now that was just so wrong on so many levels. Now he could see Spacemonkey having trouble with premature ejaculation, but he'd never had that trouble before! Not even as a horndog teenager who was always ready for action.

"Can I blame it on your overwhelming hotness and you forget this little incident?" he pleaded for mercy. This shit was just downright embarrassing. Carter deserved to come at least twice before old Jacky Boy did. I mean come on! He knew how to please a woman! This just wouldn't fly. Not with Carter. He finally had her, and here he was making a pretty strong case that she should dump his tired old ass and find some guy who could deliver the goods.

"I don't know, Jack," she said in a fake serious voice. "While I find it a bit flattering, you did leave me hanging here," she teased.

"Flattering?" he ground out in astonishment.

Carter stretched out next to him and gave him a lingering kiss, not caring if he found his own taste a bit off putting, which surprisingly it didn't. "Do you know how hot it is for a man to lose control so quickly all because of me?" she drawled huskily into his ear as she took a nibble of his lobe. "But that doesn't excuse poor manners, though. Are you going to remedy the inequity?"

Jack grinned. "And just how do you propose I do that?" he asked, a wicked gleam in his eyes as he took her Santa hat and put it on his head. It was his turn to deliver some "gifts" after all.

Carter smiled as she rolled onto her back, the pillows propping her upper body again, with her legs spread and knees raised. She moved her hand down to her center and dragged a finger through the damp folds. "How about doing a bit of reconnoitering of your own?" she suggested in as sultry a voice as Jack had ever heard.

"SWEET!" Jack said as he inwardly breathed a sigh of relief that Carter wasn't kicking his ass over his little screw up from before.

Jack scooted down on the bed and took in the sight of Carter in crotchless panties, legs spread, giving him a view he thought he'd only ever dream of. Reaching up, he removed the panties, as he didn't want anything getting in the way of his "reconnoitering" as Carter had so aptly put it. She helped by raising her hips up and he slid the lacy material off of her and tossed them aside. He made a note to let Carter know that he would definitely like to see her in such undies again at some point. His hand a bit shaky, he used his thumb and forefinger to spread open the lips that would reveal the promised land, at least Jack's promised land after all the longing and fantasizing he'd done about this very specific body part on Carter. The soft pink interior glistened and he inhaled her slightly musky feminine scent. Her clit was engorged and stood out from its hood.

Carter was beyond frustrated at this point. She knew that Jack was going to take his time, and she wanted to fully enjoy it, but the truth of the matter was that she was extremely turned on at that point and wanted nothing more than for him to plant his mouth on her pussy and show her what kind of Master he really was at the art of cunnilingus. All the other men she'd ever been with had dove right in, even the ones who hadn't enjoyed performing oral sex on a woman since it made the other enjoyable sex acts come that much sooner.

"Learning the terrain?" she teased, deciding that after all that had happened the last eleven years, knowing that many of the serious let downs and disappointments were her own damn fault, Jack was simply reveling in the moment.

"Committing it to memory, Carter," Jack said as he leaned his head in and ran his tongue from the bottom of her slit right up through until he swirled it around her clit, sucking hard on it for a moment before releasing it, blowing cool air on her exposed, moist tissues.

"You better stop teasing me, Jack O'Neill or I'll kick your ass when we finish with this," Carter said through clenched teeth. She failed to mention that that simple swipe of his tongue and quick suck on her clit had almost caused her to explode in a powerful orgasm of her own. That surprised her since she usually took a while to build up to that point. Obviously no sex since her breaking off the engagement to Pete nearly three years before had her more on edge than she had imagined.

Just as Jack was going to really dive in and go to town, the bedside phone rang. The blue one which connected his home to the SGC.

"FUCK!" Jack yelled loudly at the ceiling.

Jack grabbed the phone and angrily shouted "WHAT???"

"General O'Neill?" came the unmistakable voice of one Dr. Rodney McKay.

"What in the name of all that's Holy are you doing calling me, McKay?" he ground out as he let Sam's succulent folds go and paid slight attention to the nimrod on the phone.

"I just wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas, General, since I heard that you didn't get the leave you'd requested," McKay replied, slightly nervous since the General was obviously irate about something.

Carter couldn't believe it. Here she was seconds away from Jack going down on her and eating her to orgasm after orgasm and what happens? Rodney calls! He had to have bribed someone to open the Gate and shoot signal through to Earth and utilize the SGC's communications grid. She could also see Jack's impressive hard on taking a nose dive with some major shrinkage when he twisted to see who was on the phone. She grabbed the phone from Jack's shocked ears before her more rational mind could stop her.

"You've got two seconds to get the fuck off the line, Rodney!" Carter yelled in her best CO's voice that Jack had taught her. "I can't believe you. I was about a second away from Jack O'Neill showing me what a Master at cunnilingus he is and you interrupt! When I get back we will be having a discussion about unauthorized phone calls!" She paused a moment and looked down at Jack who was looking at her incredulously. "You have work to do, Airman," she said, the phone still in her hand. "My pussy needs some serious attention."

"Yes, Ma'am!" Jack said with his most eager voice. He placed his hands back on the prize and started to really make up for some lost time, all the while enjoying the delighted moans Carter was making.

Carter at that moment realized what she had said to Rodney, and also ordered the General to do, all the while on the phone. A crash on the other end of the line also revealed something. "McKay! I'm on the control room loudspeaker?!?!?!" she shrieked. "Sheppard! Get this twit off the damn line and make damn sure this does not go any further!"

"Yes, Colonel," Sheppard said almost glumly from his spot in the Atlantis Control Room.

Jack paused his oral appreciation of Carter's nether regions and took the phone from Carter. "Sheppard? McKay?" he growled. "You're FIRED!" he shouted like he'd done when he had said that to Sheppard when he and Woolsey were trapped on Atlantis with the Replicators. Jack slammed down the phone and looked down at all the soft, moist, pink flesh opened up before him. "Now where was I" he deadpanned, licking his lips.

A deep, feminine growl erupted from a highly embarrassed Sam as she took as much of his hair as she could in both of her hands and pulled his head down to her wet center. "Right here," she ordered and undulated her hips to make him pick up the pace, spreading her moisture all over his mouth and chin.

While she was enjoying Jack's devoted attention to detail, she couldn't help but be extremely embarrassed about what she had done on the phone. When she got back to Atlantis she was sure to receive some interesting looks, and Rodney was definitely going to be begging her not to let Jack fire him. Not an exhibitionist by nature, she was going to have a difficult time keeping a straight face and the constant blushing under control. "My pussy needs some serious attention?" She couldn't believe that she had said that out loud while still holding onto the phone and everyone heard her. And letting everyone in earshot know that Jack was about to go down on her?

Before she could continue thinking about that, the tight coil of arousal and impending orgasm was building in her stomach and she gripped his head even tighter as she continued to guide his mouth where she wanted it the most. He seemed to have a really great grasp of the female anatomy when it came to using his tongue, and what he was doing with his fingers? Oh my God! Suddenly he hit her g-spot with his index finger and pressed against it while rhythmically rubbing the small rough spot inside of her. Immediately the orgasm she'd been expecting exploded and she screamed his name as loudly as she could, all the while writhing about in spasms while he held onto her, gently using his tongue to bring her down slowly, while still keeping the arousal level elevated.

"Have I redeemed myself?" Jack asked with a shit eating grin on his face as he lifted his head from between her legs and looked up at her.

"Definitely," Sam said breathlessly. Her body felt completely boneless at that point. She felt him slide up beside her and she looked over at him, his face damp with her juices. "Did you enjoy that as much as I did?" she teased. She reached over and pulled him down for a kiss, tasting herself on his lips and tongue as she slid hers into his mouth to explore some more.

"You can count on it, Carter," Jack told her as the kiss broke before they suffocated each other.

"I don't think I've ever come that quickly before," she told him in wonder. She was enjoying the soft caresses he was making of her breasts with his free hand. His other arm was under her head as she leaned into him a bit.

"Well I am the Master, Carter," he said with a silly grin.

"You're not done yet, Master wannabe," she said with a smile of her own.

"Wannabe?" he asked indignantly.

"Of course," she said as she slid out from beside him and got on all fours, her ass pointed right at him. She looked over her shoulder as she watched him sit up and take in the view. "You still haven't fucked me yet, Major General Jack O'Neill," she said with a wink and a leering grin. His hard on was back in all its glory.

"I've spent years dreaming of this sight, Carter," he told her in awe. "And here I thought you had an awesome six in BDU's."

"Much better in the flesh, huh?" Carter said seductively. "Are you up for the challenge, Jack?" she goaded. For their first time, she knew that they were too on edge for anything slow and sensual, despite each of their earlier orgasms. She wanted to be fucked, and she was damn sure that Jack O'Neill was more than capable, and willing, to give her that.

Jack got up on his knees behind her, grasping his erection and sliding the tip through her folds, gathering a bit of lubrication, though he was sure as wet as she was, it would be no problem. Just as he pushed the tip inside her, the phone rang again. This time the all important red phone.

"God dammit!" Jack yelled. "I spend the whole fucking week alone and not a call, and now, when I have the love of my life here and we're getting down to some serious business, now people decide to call?!"

"What the hell do you want?" he yelled into the phone as Carter pulled away from him and slumped face forward onto the bed, still giving him a perfect view of her charms from behind.

"I was thinking that since I made you stay here over the holidays the least I could do is wish you a Merry Christmas, Jack," President Henry Hayes said with a small chuckle. "Something going on that I should know about?"

"Merry Christmas. I'm staring down at a very naked Carter in my bed right at this moment. Good bye, Mr. President," Jack said and hung up.

"JACK!" Sam shrieked in horror. What she'd done was bad enough on the phone, but he'd just told the President that he was in bed with her naked and having sex! That didn't keep her, though, from moving with him when he grasped her by her hips, pulling her back up on all fours.

"He may be a shrub, Carter, but he's a man and because of that he has his priorities straight," Jack explained as he pressed into her slowly, letting her stretch and adjust to his size, and the fact that she hadn't had sex in nearly three years. "Oh God, Carter, you're so fucking tight," he managed to get out as he sucked in a surprised breath.

As soon as she had adjusted to his being inside her, she rotated her hips, giving him a clear signal that she was ready for him to get to work. As he began to fuck her slowly, she got impatient, as she knew she would. Coming her like she did, and teasing him in such a blatant way, had made her incredibly horny and she wanted him to really give it to her. She slammed her ass back at him to make the point, and she was thrilled to note that he took her wordless cue and started a brisk stroke within her, his dick brushing her g-spot in just the right way to rapidly spiral her towards another orgasm.

"Just like that, Jack," she moaned. "Fuck me, dammit. Harder!" she ordered as she kept getting closer and closer. She used her inner muscles to squeeze him on every back stroke, delighting in the harsh moans coming from him. His hands on her ass as he fucked her were really digging in, and the small pain from it was invigorating. She enjoyed a bit of rough sex, and she knew that Jack would be a willing participant. The role playing fantasies she had been dreaming of for almost as long as she'd known him had become more and more prominent in her mind the last few months on Atlantis, including some mild BDSM. The thrill of her imagination sent a shudder through her, which she knew that Jack would be feeling as her inner walls rippled from it. She felt him lengthen a bit and swell as his strokes became a bit more erratic. "Come for me, Jack," she said sexily as she looked over her shoulder at him with a lust filled look. That was all it took.

Jack slammed into her one last time and shouted her name as he felt her come along with him, and he filled her with his seed. "Oh, fuck, Carter!" he said as they both fell forward, he still buried inside her as he lay on top of her. He quickly rolled to the side, taking her with him as he spooned behind her, still staying embedded in her spasming pussy.

Carter was having a difficult time catching her breath. She was still twitching from the powerful orgasm that had rocked her, and the feel of Jack softening inside of her.

"God I needed that," she said as she finally settled down. She moaned softly as Jack's hand went back to her breasts and lightly massaged them, taking care to play with her nippled while he was at it.

"You and me, both, Carter," Jack said in almost as breathless a tone. "This is so much better than the Christmas that I woke up to."

When he finally slipped out of her, she rolled to face him, loving the feel of his hand beginning to work on stroking her back. "Surprised?" she asked with a grin.

"Very," he smiled at her.

"I've got three days and nights here until I have to Gate back to Atlantis," she let him know. "I tried to get more time, but that's all I could arrange."

"Then it's my Masterly opinion that we should spend as much time as is humanly possible right here in bed giving this brand new mattress of mine a real workout," he said with as much seriousness as he could muster. Then he thought of something. "So what's my Masterly status now?" he teased.

"Mmm," Carter purred as his hand worked its way down to her ass, his fingers dipping into the cleft, teasing her sphincter lightly. She leaned forward and kissed him deeply. "Ask me again in three days," she told him. "We've got some serious years of frustration to work on relieving before I can reach any sort of conclusion. You still seem a bit quick on the finish, though." She paused a bit. "But to give you a little clue. I'm leaning towards confirming that Master rating."

"SWEET!" Jack enthused. He'd deal with the whole premature ejaculation issue in due course.

"Merry Christmas, Jack," she told him with a serious look in her eyes. "I love you."

"I love you, too, Sam," he replied, telling her what she had wanted to hear for a lot of years. He'd said it often, but since they hadn't ever been sexually intimate, it hadn't had quite the depth that it did now.

Sam got a wicked smile on her face, and began to move her head down his chest in the direction of his cock which was beginning to show some renewed energy. "Ready for Round Two, you naughty boy?" she asked fiendishly.

"I'm ready for anything you can dish out, Carter," Jack said with a wide grin. And then the phone rang.

Outside of the well built and beautiful townhouse one word could be heard shouted loudly and angrily.

"DANIEL!!!"

A/N: I hope you all enjoyed this Christmas romp and the humor I tried to interject. It was great fun writing this one. I look forward to any comments and thoughts. Best wishes on the new year! Gregg.