WARNING!: THIS IS ONLY A TWO PART ONE-SHOT.
Okay, so I know I've been a bit absent lately as a fanfiction writer, but I swear I do have my reasons. This may have been one of them. Anyway, if any of you are my loyal readers from my other fanfics, then you'll know I haven't really posted in a while. So, I'm going to explain why that is really quick.
Anyway, I've been going through a lot lately. Some of it being, losing a best friend over a silly fight, her getting married soon and her new hubby being a conniving little asshole, plus also being dumped by my own boo hasn't helped. Then there's been the recovery from said break-up, aside from the fact that a close family member of mine decided to go AWOL and completely disappear on us in the middle of the night cause he wanted to 'live his own life,' and then of course dealing with the financial repercussions of his departure. Pretty much, I've been in a deep dark depression, while working my ass off to make ends meet. Plus a major wall known to very many as severe writers block, and probably brought about due to all of this.
So, yeah, no matter how hard I've tried, no matter how many times I opened my laptop and tried to force something out, nothing would seem to stick. It wasn't until I got myself to write this little one-shot that things started getting better. I think a part of me only did it, because I really needed to vent. It may have also helped me release a few pent up frustrations, and sort out some of my own mental issues. Oh, and it may have been the original idea I had for my other story, A FAMILIAR HOWL.
Either way, this is what my dream originally started off as for my Teen Wolf story, but obviously I veered it in another direction. One, because even I can tell this character seems like a major Mary-Sue in the making, and two, it would not have ended with happily ever after. That being said, just know this is only a one-shot. I may eventually come back to work on it for fun later, but this character I wrote literally gave me chills. The only reason I'm posting it, is just for fun, and to inform my loyal readers what's going on….yet, hopefully, with an entertaining twist if you want to give it a try. Either way, just know that I'm trying really hard to get back my mojo, and I have been working on my other story EMPATHY at the moment. It's a work in progress….serious progress….but I have been trying. After that, I planned to bang out a new chapter for A FAMILIAR HOWL, before hopefully rounding it off with one for BE BRAVE. As for GUARDIAN ANGEL…well, maybe in time. Right now, I've kind of lost interest, but I'm trying to get there. Just know, that I haven't forgotten anyone out there, and all the reviews I've been receiving on my other stories have been a big help in my recovery. Just please, have patience with me, and I promise I'll get there. Anyway, love you all lots and lots. I hope you enjoy this two part one-shot, and yes, it will have a lemon in it. Blame it on the pent of sexual frustration I'm having as well lol. Either way, don't worry too much about it in this chapter. This one is pretty clean….for now HAHAHAHAHA!
Either way, enjoy, and once again, I'M AM SO SORRY FOR ALL OF THIS!
+Lost in the Echo+
I remember reading a quote once on the internet years ago that I hadn't really understood until just recently. I mean, I thought I did at the time, but now… now there was no doubt in my mind that it had settled in the darkest depth of all my thoughts. It was almost like it had been put on repeat no matter how many times that I tried to pull the switch to shut it off. Over and over, I would hear it read back to me, as if it were trying to mock my mere existence; slowly driving me crazier and crazier, as it brought me much closer to an actual mental break down day by day.
That quote is what fed the flames of fear inside me for quite some time; ever since that moment I awoke in a body and world that was not exactly like my own. It kept me from jumping into the fray to help, and it kept me from preventing what I knew would eventually come. All because I thought that it was wrong, and that this is what they had to go through to get to that miraculous heartwarming ending I had once cooed at upon my T.V. screen.
I knew I didn't belong in this world. I knew it the moment I woke up in a body that wasn't quite like my old one. I mean… it kind of was…in a sense. At least… the much younger version of me that I had once been; the one who had first begun watching that spectacular and beloved T.V. show. The version that hadn't had a care in the world at the time, and the one who'd thought that nothing bad could ever happen to her.
Yeah… that one.
The stupid, little, innocent, and naive version that ever teenager starts out as.
Though, I'm sure you're wondering by now how I went from being a normal twenty-four-year-old grown woman, to being that meek little sixteen-year-old girl all over again.
Honestly, till this day, I'm not even really sure myself.
All I remember from that time was coming home from a long day at work, shedding my clothes, eating dinner while watching reruns of my favorite T.V. show (Teen Wolf, by the way), and then finally heading to bed. After that, the only thing that I could remember was closing my eyes, feeling a tad warmer than usual, smelling some kind of awkward odor in the air, and silently wishing that the routine would end; that it all would end. You see, back then, my life wasn't so great either.
I had only graduated as a mediocre student, so of course the money for college was nearly nonexistent. This of course forced me to take a minimum wage retail job that seemed to quite literally suck the life out of me, and every day I found that I lost a little more of myself the more I stayed. You'd think though that I would have gotten some money saved by now, right? Wrong.
That job took more than half my paycheck every time, but only so that I could even still continue to work there; a little money here for some more work clothes, a bit here for some gas to get to and from work, and oh, let's not forget the larger medical bills that kept piling up from the therapist and the medicine that I had to take just to keep on working there. Plus, what probably really bit into my checks wasn't so much work, as it was more than likely my own stupidity at the time. The one where I was using it to go and visit my friends who'd obviously had it much better than me after graduation; the ones who had parents that were smarter, and had saved their kid's college funds instead of stealing it like my own biological father had done. Either way, it wasn't much longer after that before I started picking up a bottle every night, and began drowning myself in my sorrows; all so that I could still bear through the next day with a fake smile on my face all over again.
Before long, I had already lost most of my friends because of it, and even most of my family too. By the end, I'd completely found myself in a wreck, and so far in the hole that I swore I'd never be able to fully crawl out again. So yeah, when I went to bed that night, I prayed for the first time in my life since I was a little girl in Sunday school hoping that her mother wouldn't spank her for not believing in the Christian faith. However, that night, I hoped she was right, and so, against my better judgment, I prayed. I prayed that God would end all the pain and suffering. I prayed for him to make my life better. I even bartered with everything that I had left to my name…including my soul, mind you….and by the time I closed my eyes from crying myself into exhaustion….well, I felt better.
Well, at least until I woke up in my old childhood bed, and found out I was sixteen again. Oh, and yeah, everything was the same as it had been before. I mean, I honestly thought I'd really been given a second chance that day to do things right this time around.
I was wrong though.
Very wrong.
Even though everything was the same, it didn't mean that it wouldn't change eventually.
Shortly after waking up, my mother and her boyfriend had announced that we'd be moving to California, so that he could be closer to his job's home base, and although I remember this once being a discussion from before my time here, I knew that in my previous life this had not been the case.
Every day until that moment that we drove off into the unknown, every goodbye hug, and every silent cry in between, I asked myself what I had done wrong to cause this. What one flutter of my wings had created this one enormous typhoon of a change?
Though, I guess it wasn't really all that long until those questions were finally answered in a unique sort of way. It was only when my mother had proudly turned around in the car to declare to my sister and I that we had arrived at our new home that I'd finally managed to pull my head out of my ass long enough to read the terrifying road sign up ahead.
Welcome to Beacon Hills
Yes, the Beacon Hills that hadn't even existed in my world; the one that had been made up for my favorite T.V. show from what seemed like so long ago. Not to mention the fact, that I'd been so wrapped up in myself here lately that I'd even forgotten about its own existence.
Either way, I think that's when my anxiety attacks truly began, and yeah, I didn't used to have them as much as I do now.
Though, I'm sure most of you probably think that this wouldn't be as much of a problem as I had believed then, and that I was probably just overreacting. I mean, I know you probably think that something like this actually occurring around you would have more than likely been a dream come true, but in all honesty, you don't truly realize what it means until it actually does happen; to have all that powerful knowledge inside of you, and yet knowing that you can't use any of it to prevent any of those future events from taking place.
Because why?
Butterfly Effect.
Every day, and every morning, I would wake up, stare outside my window, and see Stile's Stilinski getting ready for school just like me, as he'd give me a huge grin and a hopeful little wave each and every time. I would see Allison Argent smiling at me from across the hall while she silently wondered why I had actually shied away from her on our first day at Beacon Hill's High. Not to mention, I would pass Scott McCall every day when I was at work, because my mom's fiancé had somehow convinced Dr. Deaton to take me on as another member of his crew for the Animal Clinic.
Every day, I would see all of their kind faces and hopeful little grins, and every day I would turn away and not say a word to them in fear that I would somehow upset the balance.
Don't get me wrong. I would be nice to them, and I would smile and converse with them when necessary, but I never really tried to connect with them.
Any of them, for that matter.
Even when Isaac Lahey tried to make it his mission to talk to that mousy little teenage girl that he'd somehow gotten stuck with as a Chemistry partner; which, by the way, was not the best combination as we soon found out. We both nearly failed that class time and time again. Thankfully though, Mr. Harris had some kind of surprising and unique pity on us about half-way through, and had finally separated us almost right before Isaac had joined the Teen Wolf cast.
I was more than happy about that. Especially, when I found out that there were an odd amount of students within the class, and I was left without any actual partner afterwards. Only on days when one of the students was out sick, would I find myself stuck with someone, but it was never long enough to cause too much of an issue. Eventually, they'd get the hint, and leave me to my lonely little peace.
At least…until Stiles.
That day that I found him as my partner, was the same day that my fate was ultimately sealed.
True, I had always found him to be a truly unique and quite lovable character on the show. I mean, I was right there with every other fan girl who swooned over his twitchy behavior, and charming smile. Although, seeing it on T.V. was one thing…being up close to it, well… that was an entirely whole other case.
For the first time since I'd arrived here, I found myself actually talking to someone…laughing with them. I felt my cheeks heat with a blush that I hadn't actually felt in a long time, and I felt the nervous butterflies turn into something much more. Yet, even with this new development, I tried with all my might to keep my distance from him, which was a feat within itself.
That one day seemed to spark a fire inside of him that I hadn't quite seen before, and if I thought that Isaac was hard to shake….well, let's just say that Stiles isn't just some lost puppy. No, he's practically half/snake, and half/leech. The moment that he'd see me in the halls, he'd strike with a serious vengeance, and then latch on like his entire life depended upon it.
No matter how hard I tried, and no matter how hard I tried to convince him otherwise, I just couldn't shake the kid.
Before I knew it, the part of my heart that I had reserved for him as character, suddenly became much bigger, and despite how many times I tried to remind myself that it was all wrong, my heart would only beat back at me and whisper, "Yeah, but you do love it, though."
But still, I kept my distance.
Even when Peter finally showed up, or when Jackson became the Kanima, and especially when the Alpha pack arrived. Every day, I would watch it all play out, listen to Stiles as he would complain about everything to me, while I did my best to keep my mouth shut so as not to illuminate him to the fact that I already knew what he was trying to hint at without meaning to.
I would watch him as he suffered through it all, and I would watch and listen as the chip on his shoulder grew much greater. Part of me knew it was wrong, but another part of me…another part of me was completely tired of going it alone.
A war began to rage inside of me every day after that.
I would find the words on the tip of my tongue every time his honey brown eyes would meet mine. Words, which I knew, could probably help him….but they'd never make it past my lips. Instead they would slither right back down my tongue, slide across the back of my throat, and wait until I was feeling vulnerable once again to rear their ugly head once more.
Before long, Miss. Morrell took notice of my inner turmoil, and try as she might, not even she could get me to talk. However, she did finally convince me to start writing down my feelings and thoughts.
One day, in the hall, she just suddenly walked right on up to me out of the blue with a bright smile plastered on her darkly painted lips, and shoved a small purple book into my hands. Without so much as even an apology, she'd declared, "I bought this diary for you to use. I thought that it might help with whatever you're going through, and don't worry, I did make sure to get one that even has a lock on it by the way. I figured that it might help make you feel slightly safer in writing your feelings down, if that's alright?"
I'd only given her a nod in return, and with that, she quickly went on her way; choosing to not hound me about it any further thankfully.
Though, I am sad to say, that even then her efforts seemed to have be in vain, because not but a few minutes later, I'd found myself tossing that little book into the darkest depths of my locker without another hesitant thought to it. At the time, I'd figured the whole idea had been utterly ridiculous, and that she'd merely wasted her money on something fruitless, however, it wasn't until Stiles's dad was taken by the Darach did I finally reconsider her idea.
I remember how heartbroken he'd looked, and how my heart had clenched like a vice at seeing that overwhelming sadness in his eyes. I knew I could have helped him…but, I didn't...and I silently began to wonder if it was because I was not afraid, but instead, selfish. The thoughts kept running through my mind, and no matter how much I tried to push them back, they wouldn't relent like they had before.
So, what did I do to keep from opening my mouth?
I high-tailed it back to my locker like the true wimp that I was, flung it open, yanked out that book, and let my pen meet its crisp pages in a frenzied attempt to quell my aching guilt. Before I even realized what was happening, I had spilled everything into that little diary. All my thoughts and fears, and all my hopes and dreams, but mostly, all of it I had sadly found to my dismay, revolved around the one boy who smelled deliciously like curly fries and mint mojito.
Yet, no matter how hard I tried to stop, I couldn't. I just kept writing in that book day in and day out, and before I knew it, the pages were nearly completely filled to the brim.
Miss. Morrell had been right.
The diary did help.
Just… not enough.
At least, not with finally speaking up, and telling everyone the truth.
So, I guess here we are now.
With me staring down at that blasted little purple binding that held all of my thoughts and feelings together, and no matter how hard I glared at it, I couldn't get those words to fall past my lips, as Stiles seemed to have once again found himself attached to my side for the day; slowly rambling on about the incident from this morning's class.
The same incident that had left Stiles venting about how exhausted he was today, after being up all night planning and executing his little prank for Mischief Night. However, I knew that wasn't the only reason why he wore those dark circles under his eyes, or why it seemed like even the tiniest breeze could quite literally blow him over at any second.
He thought that I assumed it was only PTSD, because of what had happened to his dad, but…I knew why he wasn't sleeping. I knew why he was having waking dreams, and I knew what evil was lurking in the back of his mind right now…just waiting to be unleashed.
And I think… that's what scared me the most.
It was one thing to watch that sexy Void Stiles on television, though it was an entirely different thing to know you were getting ready to live it… to probably even see it actually. I guess you could say that that thought was a real eye opener, but it most definitely was not a good one.
I was scared, but not only for him.
…well, maybe a lot for him actually, but that's not the point.
No, I was selfishly scared for myself too, and what it would mean for everything to come. All the times I'd watched everything play out before almost seemed different compared to this one. Why? Because this season…this time… I had a bad feeling that my thoughts and feelings for Stiles might just bring an end to my silence for good.
I was afraid that this time…. I wouldn't just be able to write it all down.
I was afraid that those words that had been on the tip of my tongue for so long, would finally find themselves out in the air for the first time since I'd stepped foot into this world.
I was scared, and possibly visible shaken too, because in the next second I'd quickly found Stiles large clammy hand resting over top of my own for the first time ever since we'd began this awkward little friendship of ours.
"Hey, are you alright," I heard him whisper softly next to my ear. Looking up into his honey-colored eyes in near shock at quite literally being caught showing some kind of weakness, I felt my own bright orbs began to glisten just slightly in surrender to his question. However, just like always, I quickly closed them, and turned away.
"I'm fine, Stiles, really. Though, honestly, you'd think by now you'd stop asking," I replied with a forced chuckle, and a silly little grin thrown his way.
"Maybe, but eventually I am going to get you to tell me what's been going on inside that intricate little brain of yours. Maybe I'll even get you to finally open up about everything too. At least, instead of you practically hiding in your room every night, and writing in that tiny damn book of yours. I swear, if I wake up in the middle of the night one more time to see your light on, I'm going to come stomping over there, and yank that tiny little ass of yours out of your house, and force you to watch all of the Star Wars movies with me until you finally fall sleep," Stile's replied with one of his own little forced grins, as he practically glared daggers at the purple book currently being held closely against my chest. I guess he'd made it more than obvious for quite awhile now that he'd hated the blasted thing about as much as me. Though, I think it was mostly because of the mystery of it all, and more than likely his want for me to actually open up to him for once. Sadly though, he'd have to keep on waiting, because there was no way in hell I was going to let him see what was inside my journal. Mostly because of the Teen Wolf bit, but another part of me knew that it was more than likely due to the explicit things I'd written about him as well. Like I said, Stiles definitely hadn't made things any easier on me since coming into my life.
With a sigh, I simply gave him a wry smile in return.
"In your dreams, Stilinski. Besides, I could almost say the same about you. You're not looking so great either, and as hilarious as that prank was on Coach Finstock…you honestly should have taken that time to sleep instead," I mumbled with a disapproving shake of my head in his direction, as we walked into our shared second period together. Glancing at the bags underneath his eyes, I felt my own soften in concern. He really did look awful, and definitely not himself. It nearly scared me half to death to know what was lurking inside of him, and slowly feeding off all the pain he was nearly putting himself through.
"Eh, I'll be fine. I'm a big boy. Besides, I've been through worse, but you… I swear. One more time, Butterfly. One more freakin' time," he chuckled as he waved his arms at me exuberantly, all while trying to ease my own worries with his ever so pleasant humor. Though, I guess I couldn't deny the fact that it may have helped his case slightly by hearing his little nickname for me; the same one he'd given me the first time we'd started talking. Honestly, the name was a cute little sentiment in his defense, but I'd only gained it because of those times in the beginning when I use to nearly fly down the halls just to try and avoid him.
I think he said he'd almost compared it to seeing a butterfly floating away from him; something unique and way beyond interesting to watch, but harder than hell to catch if you weren't doing it right.
Since then, that's all he's ever called me. Even when I'd insisted he'd call me by my actually name, but no, it would always be Butterfly to him.
I guess it was kind of ironic in a way, if you truly thought about it.
Though still, the rational part of me really hoped that he'd stop that soon, because it wasn't really helping how I felt at all. The more he called me that, the more I began to question my decision to stay away from him, and that's something I really didn't need to be doing. Especially because of the strawberry blonde that was currently sitting within this room; the same one that he would eventually end up with in the end. The last thing that I needed was a broken heart on top of everything else.
Sighing, I turned to give him one of my obviously annoyed looks.
"You know, I really wish that you'd stop that," I mumbled uneasily, as I settled into my desk chair behind him.
"Stop what," he replied with one of his cocky little grins that I'd quite honestly come to love, however, instead of swooning like I should have, I simple gave him another glare in return.
Rolling his eyes at the look, he grumbled, "Still on about that nickname, I see."
"Yes," I nearly groaned in defeat as I already knew where this one was about to go, but like always I went on to insist once more, "I have an actually name you know? You should use it instead. Besides, would you rather I found out what your real name is and start calling you by that?"
His eyes nearly bugged out of his head, as he practically broke his neck trying to whip around in his seat to face me, "NO!"
"Really? I bet that it's not even that bad, honestly" I sung with a grin, as he merely glared at me in return.
"Trust me. It is. It's very very bad," he insisted while nearly grinding away his teeth in the process. Shaking my head at him, I merely rolled my eyes, and gave him another girlish and silly little grin.
In truth, I didn't even know if I could even say his first name anymore, or even spell it for that matter, but I did know what it was. It was actually one of the many things that I had held particular close to my heart since ending up here in Beacon Hills. Although, I'm sure I'd never tell him that of course. One, because he'd probably lord it over me for quite a while afterwards, and two…well, you know the reason.
Forcing another smile his way, I noticed out of the corner of my eyes our teacher slowly beginning his lesson for the day, and with a gentle sigh, I knew that my time with him was up once again.
"Whatever you say, Stiles. Anyway, how about instead focusing on this, you actually focus on what the teacher is writing on the board instead. Remember, I could still use that help with my math, you know," I giggled, as I leaned forward for the first time since I met him, and placed my hand on his cheek. His surprised expression was nothing compared to the utter feeling of shock I'm sure he had within that moment, as I gripped his chin, and practically forced him to face forward.
Although, I think what I was surprised by the most in that moment was the slight red tinge I saw slowly forming up the back of his neck, and more than likely all over his face as well. However, it's not like I didn't mirror him in that feature I'm sure, since I was practically biting my lip in surprise at what I'd just done.
In all the time that I'd known him, we'd always avoided contact with one another. Sure, we'd joke around, and discuss things on occasion, but not once had we ever put our hands on one another. Mostly because in the beginning I had shied away from his touches, fearing that it would only remind me of just how real this all was. Though, another part of me argued that it may actually be for a different reason though.
One of which, apparently, Allison, Isaac, and Scott already seemed to know of, as I caught them glancing slyly between the two of us from the next row over. Shaking my head at the three's obvious looks, I quickly cleared my throat, forced myself to hold my head up high, and instead tried to focus in on the current lesson we were going over.
There was no reason to continue to dwell on any of it right now.
Besides, I could always write about it in my diary later, right?
Wrong.
Definitely wrong.
After getting home from work later that night, I soon found that that little purple book was in fact missing, and as I scoured through my belongings, I silently prayed that I hadn't left it at the school. I mean, the last thing that I needed was for it to end up in the hands of the psychotic William Barrow. God only knows how horrible that one would be. Then again, seeing how desperate I was to find that book, I'm sure that would be the least of my problems if I decided to actually go through with that horrible little thought that just ran through my mind. The one where I stupidly decided it was more important than my own life right now.
Which, it kind of was, but still… even I'm not that dumb enough to go waltzing back in there at this time of the night with an escaped convict on the loose. I mean, I could already hear the report I'd have to give to the cops now for being there after hours if they found me…and that's IF they found me alive.
Either way, after hours of searching high and low for the book, and digging through almost all of my bags nearly twenty times, I quickly realized that it was useless, and that I had more than likely left it back at the school. Although, I really couldn't remember where I'd left it….or if I'd even remembered to lock it for that matter!
God, just the thought of someone coming across that journal had my skin practically crawling and my eyes nearly bugging out at the images, and try as I might, I just couldn't seem to retrace my last steps the more the nagging little demons took a hold of me. No matter how hard I tried, my mind kept running back to the last time I remembered having it in my own two hands.
Which, was when I'd been walking with Stiles.
Shit! STILES!
Shit, shit, SHIT!
I really couldn't help praying within that moment, against my better judgment, as I slowly began to remember what I had stupidly done right after class had ended that period. I'd been in such a hurry to leave math, and get away from Stiles, that I'd completely forgotten to take my normal precautions within that moment. All I'd done was just grab whatever I could reach within that second, shoved it into my bag, and then practically sprinted out of the room before he'd even risen from his own seat to question me about it.
I know, it was obviously a chicken-like move, but it was the only one I'd been able to come up with at the time; especially since I'd noticed him practically twitching in front of me the whole class period, as he and Scott shared knowing looks between one another. Glances, that I'm fairly certain, were meant for me since I'd obviously noticed Allison shooting me her own empathetic ones throughout the period.
I'm not sure why though?
Then again, maybe it was because they could finally tell that I liked him, and that he was still practically head over heels for Lydia?
Even they knew it was a lost hope, and they felt bad for me, and now Stile's probably realizes it too, and is just trying to be nice, and figure out a way to let me down easily…not that he has to though. I mean, I'd already decided a long while ago that it'd never happen…that I wouldn't let anything like that happen; which was a good idea.
Right?
Right.
God! I'm such an idiot!
Shaking my head, I went back to trying to retrace my steps just to be sure, and every time I kept coming back to that one classroom. I knew that I'd had it with me there, and if I did then that would mean that it should be in my back-pack right now, because I'm pretty sure I practically shoved everything inside of it at the time. Though, it's not like I hadn't looked at it the rest of the day after that.
I guess there was always that small possibility….
Maybe…
NO!
No, it has to be in there, because if it isn't then that means it's still in the classroom….or WORSE!
One of the others might have it this very second, thinking that they'd only been doing me a good deed by holding on to it. Though, part of me knew that if it had been Allison, Scott, or Stiles, then they would have just handed it back to me later in the day, or maybe left it in my locker, right?
That's it!
My locker!
It has to be there!
I never went back to it after that one class, because I assumed that Stiles might try to corner me like he always did. So, that means, maybe it's there!
Either way, I could only pray for now, and hope that I'd remembered to lock it.
Besides, I still have the key hanging from the chain around my neck, so it's not like it was that bad…right?
Wrong….Wrong AGAIN!
I still hadn't found it, and yes, it hadn't been in my locker when I'd gone to check. Plus, I'd practically scoured my math classroom, and nearly insulted the teacher in my haste to find it. Though, I'd immediately come up empty handed in my desperate attempt to locate it once the school hours had actually begun. Before I'd even had time to explain to Coach Finstock as to why I wasn't immediately heading to class, he loudly announced with a microphone practically shoved up next to my ear, "JUST BECAUSE THE POWER IS OUT, THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU GET TO SKIP CLASS MISS. PIERCE! MOVE IT!" Of course that retort was quickly followed up with another insult to Greenburg who was also lollygagging behind me as well with his own group of friends.
Either way, with a huff, I'd merely followed his orders and made my way to first period to find Stiles already there waiting for me, and obsessing over the key that he'd found inside his locker earlier this morning. This of course only made me groan in contempt and jealousy, as I quickly remembered that I hadn't been so lucky in finding something else as important in my own locker; not to mention, none of the others said a word about my journal as well when I'd questioned them about it.
Either way, the day wasn't going as well as I hoped it would.
Letting out a heavy sigh, I shoved my things into the gym locker as I got ready for my daily dose of physical education. I definitely wasn't looking forward to it right now, and if you thought that I was inept at doing math, it was nothing compared to the scrawny attempts I made at trying to be physically active. Not to over exaggerate, but I'm pretty sure I'd put Bella Swan to shame with how bad my own clumsiness was compared to hers.
Hell! Even Coach had commented on it more than a couple times, as he'd compared me once to a newborn pony while I'd been trying to run track. Yeah, that had not been one of my best moments. Especially when out of pure embarrassment from his remark, I'd found that my mind suddenly grew too clouded to notice the upcoming bar in front of me. So, of course, I'd ended up with a giant bump on the head from my fall, and almost more than a sprained ankle had it not been for Isaac quickly swooping in to save the day at that time.
I'd found that within seconds he'd been at my side with Scott and Stiles not far behind, and they'd practically hauled me up together, and rushed me to the school nurse against the Coach's 'better' wishes for me to, "Walk it off."
Idiot.
Either way, I was definitely not looking forward to another day of physical endurance. One of which, Lydia apparently seemed to notice for once.
"Are you alright," the red-head asked out of more curiosity than concern.
"Um, yeah, just…having an off day, I guess."
"Isn't that like every day for you in this class," she giggled, obviously remembering the incident. Grimacing at her words, I tried not to take it to heart, as Allison shot a warning look both of our ways. I knew she was just trying to be nice, but…Lydia definitely could get under one's skin; even after her sudden dramatic change from last year.
So, with another sigh, I gave her a forced smile and a gentle nod. Thankfully, it seemed to warm her up to me a bit, as she decided within that moment to spew some kind of crap that she thought might help me with my situation. I mostly tuned her out, as the three of us exited the girl's locker rooms.
However, on the way out though, I noticed Scott and Stiles lingering nearby, and as they saw the two girls in front of me I curiously noted the fact that they were giving them a wondering glance. What was even more unusual was that it was mostly Stiles, as I watched Lydia give a slight nod in his direction.
Raising my brows in curiosity, I was getting ready to ask what that was about when suddenly I found myself bombarded by another one from their group.
Isaac.
"Hey! Do have a minute? I needed to ask you something," Isaac practically vomited out, as I stared wide-eyed at the strange little wolf in front of me. Glancing between him and the two girls slowly moving away, I knew within that moment that there was no point in avoiding him. My only escape route had already disappeared into the crowd, and I knew no one else around me to use as an excuse.
I guess condemning yourself to a life of being antisocial did that kind of thing, but right now, I couldn't help cursing that previous decision.
However, I guess there was no use dwelling on it now. So, with more than a labored sigh, I quickly resigned myself to my fate.
"Um, yeah, sure. What's up," I questioned, turning to give him my full attention.
Though, without a single bit of warning, he gave me a big bright devil-like grin, and then practically yanked me away from the rest of the onlookers as he lured me into a deserted hallway. Within seconds, I found my heart pounding nearly a mile a minute, as my eyes practically widen to the size of saucers. However, that didn't seem to concern him at all, as he quickly turned to face me once more when he finally felt satisfied enough that we were actually alone.
"Ummm mind explaining what that was about," I questioned shakily, as I looked between him and my only exit within that moment.
"Sorry about that. I just didn't want the others to hear," he replied with a gentle smile, but something about his eyes seemed almost off. Maybe it was the slight twitch I noticed, or maybe it was his defensive stance, but something told me he wasn't really telling the truth. Either way, I decided to remain on guard, as I gave him a questionable nod.
"Uh-huh, well, get on with it. As much as I don't want to participate in P.E. today, I'm pretty sure I'd rather not have detention for not showing up at all," I grumbled in distaste for the subject, as he gave a quick, and almost, jerky nod while forcing a smile onto his lips at the mention of my most dreaded class.
"Right, well, I was just wondering…if….if…"
"If what, Isaac," I huffed in warning while noticing his eyes shifting to and fro, as he rubbed the back of his head in distress. Obviously, something was up, and there was no denying it now, and just the memory of my lost journal had me a bit on edge with him at that moment.
Had he found it?
However, after glancing back down the hallway, it seemed Isaac's mind was soon made up for him, and in a sudden burst of confidence, he blurted out, "Do you like Stiles?"
HUH?
"Wait! What?"
"Sorry, I'm not meaning to pry or anything….or that….you know, I'm jealous, cause I like somebody else as I'm sure you've noticed, but I uh, I was just asking for…."
"Stiles," I mumbled, as suddenly everything seemed to come together.
"Yeah, yeah. I mean, do you?"
"Like him," I questioned with a grimace, as my heart sped up in retaliation to his inquiries.
"Yeah. I mean, it's okay if you don't. It's just, we always kind of wondered, you know? I mean, we all tried reaching out to you when you first got here, because you just seemed so….sad, but then you'd always try to avoid us….except for him, of course."
Suddenly my eyes widened at his words, and no, not just because of what he'd been insinuating before. No, this time it was because of the one thing he was trying not to say. The one thing I had ultimately caused myself, but couldn't help but feel angry about within that moment.
Sad?
I looked sad?
"You mean pathetic," I bit out harshly, as his eyes widened in horror at my words.
"No! No, that's not what I'm…"
"It's alright Isaac. I get it. I was pathetic, and ya'll took pity on me because of it," I practically hissed out, as the anger I'd been feeling for myself decided to finally rear its ugly head. One, which he quickly noticed as his eyes grew large in embarrassment. However, by that point, the damage was already done, and the flood gates had already fully opened. Not to mention, I'd gone for hours without a healthier way to vent, and that had definitely not helped my case one single bit.
So, of course, before I could control what came spewing out of my mouth next, I'd found it already slipping past my tongue, as I practically whip-lashed him with my next few words, "It's fine, really Isaac. I've known for quite some time now that you all think I'm some kind of pathetic little teenager who can't make any friends on her own. I've probably just been some kind of pet project to all of you too if I'm right, but here's the thing. Newsflash, I didn't want any of you bothering with me to begin with, and I'm not sad about it. I'm perfectly fine with it. Better than ever, actually. I would have been fine with or without any of ya'll, so if that's all any of you can see me as then don't even bother pretending alright. It's the last thing that I want."
I knew I was wrong. I knew I was being a bitch, and Isaac was the last person who deserved this kind of treatment, but the anger from everything I'd been going through finally seemed to boil over inside of me. It was like that last bit of weight that finally seemed to break the camel's back, and I was…I was tired of it all. I was tired of feeling like this. I was tired of tiptoeing around everything…and sadly… Isaac was about to get the brunt of it.
"Wait, what? No, that's not what I was saying at all. You got it all wrong. I'm sorry if you thought…"
"I don't have to think it, Isaac! I know it. You think I don't know the pitying looks you all give me when my back is turned, or the little whispered conversations you all have about me when you think that I can't hear you. You know, I'm sick of it. I didn't ask to come here. I didn't ask for you all to pity me. I didn't ask to know about everything. All I asked for was a little bit of peace in my own screwed up little life, and you know what, in a sad twist of fate, I got the exact opposite. So yeah, fuck you! Fuck all of you! I'm tired of it, and I don't need your help, and I don't want it. So just leave me alone," I practically screamed, as I realized within that exact second just how close I'd gotten to the boy, as the look of fear and hurt grew within his eyes. It was in that moment that I truly realized just what I'd done, as I remembered what exactly he had gone through in the past himself.
I shouldn't have done it.
I'd lost control for the first time since I'd ended up here, and of course I had to take it out on the last person who really didn't deserve it.
Closing my eyes, as tears of regret began to slip past my restraints, I slowly began to back away. However, it seemed that even then, Isaac still wanted to prove just how much of a saint he'd truly become as of late, as he tried to reach out and stop me from leaving. Though, I couldn't even look at him, let alone listen to whatever he had to say about my little rant mere moments ago.
So, shaking my head in surrender, I brought my arms up to encircling myself, praying that that one movement might help me control it; help me control the bleed that definitely shouldn't be showing itself to him.
Taking a deep breath, I opened my eyes to find him looking back at me with his own in concern once again. Letting out a watery chuckle, I decided to do what I should have done in the beginning since this all began.
I remained strong in my decision, looked him right in the eyes, and tried to forget everything.
"Just… leave me alone. That's all I want," I sniffled, before turning my back to him, however, as an afterthought, I knew there was one last bridge I was going to have to burn; one which I knew would probably be the hardest, and I think a part of me even secretly knew that he wouldn't believe… especially with his stupid wolf hearing. However, I had to try.
At least, that's what I kept chanting inside of my head as I went on to say the words that I knew that I would never be able to mean.
"And no, I don't like Stiles. You can tell him yourself."
With that, I slowly began to walk away, but before I could get out of ear shot, I heard him call back to me with more than utter regret, "I know you're lying."
Stopping in my tracks, as his words washed over me, I tried once again to hold it all in. To pray that I was strong enough to walk away from him, and prove that I was right….even if I knew I wasn't; to hope against all hope that my tears wouldn't betray me within that second. Though, even I knew it was a long shot as I went to counter his witty little retort with one of my own.
"So what if I am. None of it matters anyway, right," I mumbled, before finally sprinting the rest of the way to the girl's bathroom to avoid him any further; or anyone else for that matter. Sadly though, I managed to bump into one of them on my way. However, thankfully it was just innocent little Kira, and I was lucky enough to get away with a quick apology before hurriedly sliding past her. Though, I'm not going to lie. I'm pretty sure I left her feuding with her own self, as she tossed the idea back and forth of whether or not to follow after me, but it seemed she'd decided not to though, and that was probably only because she was dealing with her own demons at the time from the looks of it.
Guess I got lucky with that one.
Either way, after all of that, there was no way I was going to face any of the others again; especially with the tears practically flowing off of my cheeks right now.
Instead, I decided to hide out in the girl's bathroom the rest of the period, and I only returned when I was absolutely sure that the others had already dressed and left. Though, it figures that the moment I would walk back into that gym, I would of course find to my displeasure Coach Finstock waiting for me, as he gave me a stern look and an evil little glare. In fact, I'm pretty he had a detention slip balled up inside his fist waiting for me, but the second his eyes met mine, I saw all of that red hot rage drain out of him.
I guess I would never really know if that paper had been a detention slip or not, because the moment he saw my red tinted cheeks, puffy eyes, and disheveled look, it was almost like the soft side of him reappeared within that moment; one, that I quite honestly, didn't know he was capable of possessing.
With a sad little grimace, he quickly muttered out that it was okay, but that I shouldn't do it again. With that, he'd practically dashed away with the hopes that he wouldn't have to awkwardly comfort a weepy little teenage girl. I was glad he was smart enough to do that though, because the last thing that I needed to hear was a lecture from Bobby Finstock.
Either way, I hurriedly left the gym and quickly headed back to the girl's room to grab my things from my locker. Though, upon arriving, and as I reached forward to key in my combination, I immediately realized that it was already slightly ajar. Raising a curious brow, I pulled it open and peered inside to see if anything had been taken. However, finding everything of mine still inside, especially the key to my diary, I instantly relaxed. Though, I could have sworn I'd hidden the chain underneath my clothes and not between them however.
Either way, with a tired little shrug, I quickly got dressed, grabbed the rest of my things, and headed towards the main office. Maybe with some more luck I might be able to get the school nurse to take pity on me too, and convince her to let me leave for the day. Besides, it's not like I hadn't missed even a single day since I'd arrived here. Not even when I'd gotten the flu. Though, that might not have been one of my brightest ideas considering a couple of students had caught it right after me.
Anyways though, by the time I reached the school's nurse a little while later, she was so preoccupied with another student (Jared, I think) that she'd merely waved me on, and said it'd be fine if I left for the day. Plus, it probably helped that I still looked like hell from earlier on. So, I guess that might have been the best incentive in getting her approval overall.
Either way, without a second to lose, I practically sprinted from the school and towards my car. However, not without a few strange looks thrown my way in the process, as I quickly noted the one worried look from Mr. Yukimura as I practically bumped into him in my haste to leave. Thankfully though, I managed to get away without so much as a lecture from him as well, and within moments, I found myself safely inside my car, and on my way home.
Pulling into the driveway a few minutes later, I nearly sighed in relief upon noticing that both of my parents' cars were still gone for the day. At least that meant that I wouldn't have to explain to them why I was home so early for once, because I'm almost certain that they wouldn't believe me if I told them I was just sick. They were just those kind of parents who could sniff out a lie a mile away…well, at least when it came to me that is; my sister was probably a different story, though.
Shit!
I knew I'd forgotten something!
With a groan, I quickly realized that I'd forgotten one important detail in my haste to leave the school earlier, and what was that you may ask?
I'd been the one to stupidly drive my sister to school today since her car had recently been placed in the shop, which means...I was dead. I was so very dead if she heard wind of my escape. I'm almost certain that no amount of supernatural strength would be able to hold her back from tearing me limb from limb if she learned that I'd left her without a ride home, and god only knows how my parents would react if they found out about it too.
Grumbling beneath my breath, I yanked my phone out of my jacket pocket, and proceeded to seal my fate with a quick text hurriedly sent to her number. Even though I really didn't want to admit my lack of ignorance towards her presence, I figured that it might be in my best interests to at least warn her that she wouldn't have to wait for me after school that day. Besides, maybe just this simple text would keep not only her, but our parents as well, from practically signing my death certificate later on. Either way, with a heavy sigh, I quickly informed her that I'd left school early today due to the fact that I hadn't been feeling all that well, and that maybe she should try getting a ride home from one of her friends; possibly Danny since he was never one to turn away someone in need. At least…I hoped he wasn't.
Thankfully, right after sending the text, it wasn't but a few seconds later that I heard my phone ding with her reply. Glancing at the screen, I saw with slight relief that she hadn't taken my abrupt departure too much to heart, and that she had already planned on doing so because of the Black Out Party later that night anyway. However, she did make sure to add that she was sorry that I was feeling sick though, and that she'd make sure to let our parents know to avoid me for the next twenty-four hours while I recovered; something that I knew they'd listen to if it came from her.
I guess having a sister sometimes can be a bit of a godsend; especially one who had this strange sort of power over my mom and her dad, and could practically convince them of anything by this point. Sometimes it even paid off to have her on my side once in awhile too, though, I knew it wasn't always like that in the beginning. It took quite a bit of work over the years to gain her respect, and only by keeping most of her dirty little secrets from our parents had I somehow managed to acquire it. Though, I still couldn't help thinking that it seemed almost morally wrong to do so.
Either way, however, with that one thing finally said and done, I quickly shut off the car and made my way on inside the house. However, the moment I closed the door behind me, and placed my keys on the hook beside it, I felt everything that had happened to me in the last few hours come washing right back over me, and before I even realized what was happening, the tears had already come back with a vengeance.
Practically sprinting to my room, I quickly found myself taking solace underneath my covers as I tried to hideaway from the world around me once more. I know it was selfish, and I know it was far beneath me to act like the little brat that I was being within that moment, but honestly…all I wanted was to forget. All I wanted was to be left alone, and try to pull myself back together once again. Besides, it's not like I had alcohol this time around to numb the pain, and that was probably for the best if I was being honest. I mean, look at the mess I'd put myself through in my previous life.
It honestly hadn't done me any good then, and neither had feeling sorry for myself. Though, that still didn't stop the self-hate from flooding in all over again, as I practically tried to force my body to conform to the comforter around me. Grinding my teeth, as I tried to push the horrible thoughts away, I decided to continue to let the tears flow….though, I did promise myself that this would be the last time that I did so.
Why?
Because I couldn't let this control me anymore.
I refused to be that kind of person that constantly breaks down every time something like this happens. I was stronger than that…I know I was. Especially because I knew the kind of people who'd raised me to be that way; who'd made sure to remind me of that every single day. Hell! From what I've heard, they'd even gone through much worse than I had.
So, why should I be allowed to wallow when I'm sure they hadn't? Why did I get the privilege to act like a baby when everyone had it worse off than me?
Yep, I didn't have that right, and as that thought finally managed to enter my racing thoughts, I felt my body slowly began to calm in its hysterics, as the sobs carefully began to cease. Before long, even my breathing evened out, and not much longer after that….I'd easily found myself drifting off into a dreamless sleep.
At some point though, during my comatose-like state, I briefly remembered my mother checking in on me with my step-dad. However, after quickly feeling for a temperature, and making sure that I was as snug as a bug in rug, they quickly agreed that school probably wouldn't be in my best interest for tomorrow; though, this of course, I was completely fine with. Although, I'm sure I'd probably have to thank my step-sister for this one however, because from the sounds of it, she'd been the one to influence their decision this time around.
Like I said before, thank God for step-sisters when you absolutely needed them.
Either way, by the time morning came around, and I'd finally heard Stiles's jeep leave for school, I quickly deduced that my parents were keeping to their words from the night before. Though, at some point during my hibernation, I did hear my mom come into my room to leave me something to eat. However, it seemed food was the last thing on my mind right now, and that soon became apparent to her as well when she returned to check in on me much later only to find that the plate had practically been untouched. With a sad shake of her head, she'd merely taken a hold of it, and left the room to go back to her own sanctuary for the rest of the day.
Thankfully, that was the last I saw of her until later that evening when I'd awoken with a start to find her gently lifting the covers back over top of me. Carefully raising my heavy head, I groggily replied, " 'ey Mom."
"Oh, I'm sorry sweetie. I didn't mean to wake you up. I was just making sure you were still warm," she whispered back in a soothing tone, as she ran her soft hand through my hair to fix the mess that had only grown worse throughout my little coma today.
"It's alright," I mumbled, as I plopped back onto my pillow away from her prying hands. Don't get me wrong, I loved my mother, but I really couldn't stand when she would 'mom,' me like that. Besides, I'd always been a bit tender-headed when it came to having someone run their hands through my hair, and part of me wonders if that was because of her and her frenzy to brush my long locks as a child. I'd never been one to sit still when I was younger; even now, it seemed, as I noticed her scrutinizing little gaze.
"Well, anyway, I just wanted to check in on you to see if you were feeling any better, hun" my mother declared with a final roll of her eyes at the reaction I'd had towards her motherly gesture, however she didn't hold resentment for long, as I weakly announced, "I'm fine, honestly. I just felt a little ill yesterday, that's it, but um…thanks for letting me stay home today, Mom. I really appreciated it."
"No problem, sweetie, but tomorrow you've got to go back. You know I don't like it when you miss school. It's not good for your math education, and trust me, that's something you're going to need later on in life. Even if you don't want to believe me," she replied with a purse to her lips, as if she were debating whether or not to continue berating me about it, or just leave it to lie for now. Thankfully, after my obedient little nod in confirmation, she chose the less exhausting path, as she gave a quiet sigh, and went on to reply, "Well, I guess I'm off to work then for the night. It's another late shift for me again this week, but there's still some food leftover in the fridge, and your sister's staying over with a friend tonight, so you'll have the house to yourself for once."
"Wait, what about Floyd," I asked wondering where my step dad was, and worrying if he'd be around at all tonight either. I mean, not that I didn't enjoy his presence, but to be completely honest… he worried a lot more than my mother, and had a way of picking up on any strange vibes coming off of me, or even his own daughter at times. The last thing that I wanted right now was for him stressing over me like my mom was.
"Don't worry. He won't be around tonight either. He had to leave earlier today when he got called in. They needed him to drive another shipment across country, and then he's got another huge load after that to take up North. I swear, sometimes I wonder why I even married a truck driver," she giggled, as I rolled my eyes upon seeing that sparkle lighting up within her eyes. The same one she'd worn since the day she'd met him. There was no denying how she really felt about that man at all.
"Umm do you think it might be because you actually love him more than you want to admit," I teased, while forcing a smile for her sake. However, noting that familiar little look of doubt within her eyes, I quickly went on to add, "But, just so you know Mom, I am glad you found him. He seems good for you, and it's much better than seeing you without him."
Upon seeing her gracious smile, I couldn't help feeling that vice-like grip tighten around my heart once more, as I remembered what her fate had truly been before all of this. Back when things went a little differently. Before I'd awoken as a teenager again, she'd already left Floyd, and he'd already remarried someone else. Her excuse then was that it just wasn't working out, but part of me knew that it was because of the strain of his job, and probably even my 'sister,' getting pregnant as a teen at the time as well; but honestly, it was probably mostly due to her own darker thoughts of doubt. She suffered from them probably worse than I did, but thankfully, she'd managed to hide hers much better over the years. Though, that was probably due to her age more than skill.
Either way, it probably helped that Floyd was closer to his job now too, and to top it off, we'd thankfully managed to get out of there before my sister had gotten the chance to meet the future father of her child as well. Though, I still couldn't help feeling slightly guilty about that last one. I mean, that was a life that had technically been taken away because of all of this…because of me. That guilt would never fully go away; especially when I'd hear my sister talk about how she wanted a slew of children when she was older.
This change to our lives…it wasn't all that good.
I mean, don't get me wrong. I loved Alicia and all of her wild heathen-like tendencies, but it seemed like she'd ended up with the short end stick in all of this worse than I had. Even though we had gained a better respect for one another, I still wish she could have found that saving grace she'd once had. The one where she'd been slapped in the face with reality, and had been forced to grow up for her child. However, the person she was now….well, let's just say I hardly ever saw her unless it was due to some kind of special circumstance. Most of the time, she was out spending the night with one of her 'friends,' and I'd only see her the next day at school long enough to inform her about what was going on at home. How she managed to get away with it all….well, it was still a mystery to me; especially since I found myself being treated like a porcelain doll half the time.
But, I guess I hadn't really helped prove that I wasn't; especially from the example I'd shown everyone yesterday.
Shaking my head to rid myself of the disastrous thoughts once more, I turned my attention back to my mother once again as she slowly rose from my bed to leave for the night.
"Anyway, I guess I'm going to head on out then. I just wanted to make sure before I left that you'd be fine with being home alone tonight…cause, you know…you can always invite someone over if you'd like. Maybe even study with that Isaac kid again. He seemed like a nice one," she insisted, as I wrinkled my nose at her suggestion. If anything, Isaac was the last person I wanted around right now; especially after what happened yesterday. Though, it's not like I could tell her that. So instead, I went with the safer route.
"Honestly, Mom. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. Besides, I'm a big girl, and I don't need some big strong man hanging around to protect me, or would you rather me believe in some silly little girly notion such as that. I mean, 'cause I can completely toss out those feminism books you've been hiding from Floyd, you know. I'm sure he'd be happy to hear that you'd rather be barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen," I teased, as she merely rolled her eyes at my natural sarcastic nature that she'd come to love over the years. Batting my arm in retaliation, she muttered, "Touch my books, or think like that again, and I'll send you off to boarding school where you won't see me again until you graduate."
"Promise," I quipped good-naturedly, but that only earned me a few more slaps to the head, as she stuck out her tongue childishly. With one last smile towards one another, she leaned down and placed a motherly kiss upon my forehead, before whispering, "Love you sweetie, goodnight."
"Love you too, and good night, Mom. See you in the morning," I replied, giving her one last hug, before she quickly made her way out of my room. It wasn't but a few seconds later that I heard the front door closing downstairs, and her car leaving the drive. Only then did I finally sit up and reach into my jacket pocket for my phone.
Plugging the device into the charger lying on top of my covers, I gave it a few minutes to reboot before finally trying to turn it on. Sadly though, that was my first mistake.
Almost instantly I was met with a barrage of ear-piercing little dings, as my phone practically disappeared into thin air from the sheer force of the vibrations it was emitting. Dropping it like a hot potato, I decided to give it a couple of seconds to come to its senses, before carefully reaching for it again after it had finally seemed to calm itself once more. Though, that was probably my next mistake, as I soon found more than a hundred missed calls and texts from various individuals…oh, and by the way, that wasn't including the ones from social media.
Shakily, I slowly began to sift through them all.
A few were obviously some that I recognized, and then there were of course the ones that I had no clue about. Although, something told me from their concerned words that they might actually just be from some of Stiles's friends…and yes…I do mean the supernatural ones. How do I know it was from them though, because only Stiles and Isaac had been able to fish my phone number out of me. Stiles because….well, let's not really go there. Isaac, however, was simply because he had been my lab partner once upon a time. It'd just made things simpler when it came to getting assignments done back then.
Either way, I decided to quickly answer the missed messages from my friends back home, while trying my best to not look at the ones from Stiles and his friends in the process. I knew that if I did, it would only cause more problems, and merely end up swaying the decision that I had made previously. Besides, another part of me was profoundly angry that Stiles had handed out my phone number to everyone else against my original wishes not to, so part of it was slightly out of revenge too, I guess. However, after a few minutes of glaring at the screen, and the unwanted phone numbers I hadn't yet to answer, I quickly found myself losing that little internal battle inside of me.
Not much longer after that, I soon found my finger swiping across the screen to open one message box in particular; one, which I knew, was more than a bad idea to look at.
I'm so sorry- StilesStilinski
Please, would you call me- StilesStilinski
Can you PLEASE call me back! Pretty PLEASE!- StilesStilinski
DAMN IT WOMAN! IF YOU DON'T CALL ME BACK SOON I'M GOING OVER TO YOUR HOUSE AND YANKING YOU OUT OF IT!- StilesStilinski
You are SO lucky your dad didn't know who I was, and that he wouldn't let me past the front door. By the way, was your dad ever a cop? Pretty intimidating guy, by the way. Reminds me a bit of Samuel L. Jackson, but anyway just… CALL ME BACK- StilesStilinski
I can see you from my window, and don't think I didn't notice you tossing and turning. You obviously hear me calling you. If you don't answer in the next few minutes I don't care what my dad thinks, I'm going to go find a ladder, and climb in through your window. ANSWER. NOW- StilesStilinski
You're way beyond lucky that we don't own a ladder apparently. That and I also have to go meet Scott and Kira soon. Anyway, if you decide to actually pull your head out of your ass long enough, there's a party tonight, and I was hoping that you'd come with me. I know it's not your thing, but…here's me hoping- StilesStilinski
Guess that's a negative on the party then- StilesStilinski
Just left the party. I think I figured something out about that key that I found. I hope you don't end up showing up after I already left- StilesStilinski
Butterfly, I need you to answer me right now. I think something's wrong. I think I'm losing my mind. I need someone to talk to. Please!- StilesStilinski
For God's sake, please stop wallowing. It's already been 24 hours. It's going to be okay, the dumbass forgives you, and I'm sorry about what happened. We should have never done that, and Isaac's an idiot. I'm not sure what he said…but he's an idiot. Please, just call me, Butterfly- StilesStilinski
I need you to call me right now. I need to talk to you about something. I…just call me- StilesStilinski
I don't know if you'll get this message, but I'm heading to the hospital. Something's not right. Just…please, if you get this message, call me. I need to know you're at least alright, please. Can you at least do that?- StilesStilinski
Staring at my phone in disbelief at that last message, I nearly bit through my lip as I quickly began running the Teen Wolf timeline through my mind once again. I mean, I knew they were pretty far along in the third season now, and I knew what was happening, but…could it really be that soon? Could he…
But I already knew the answer.
I knew it the moment I'd heard about the Blackout Party.
I knew it the moment the cops showed up at our school looking for William Barrow.
It was already here, and obviously Stiles was already dealing with the repercussions from it. However, what was most disturbing about all of this was what I had done….which was absolutely nothing…like always. I had only ignored his pleas for help once again, and now he was at the hospital…and it was all my fault. I could have prevented this. I could have stopped this from happening, but I didn't. Why though?
Because of that stupid Butterfly Effect.
The one that could potential screw up every last living detail of their fate, and end up getting them all killed if I wasn't careful enough. However, a part of me honestly didn't care about that anymore, because that part now only cared about Stiles and what he was going through. That part selfishly didn't want to have to see him put through anymore of that pain….but it also knew that it was already too late, and that he was already being put through it. The creature inside of him was already taking over, and there was nothing I could do about it right now…well, nothing to extraordinary at least.
With a heavy sigh, I closed my exhausted eyes to try and block out the brightly illuminated screen before me. Giving my temples a little rub in agitation, and maybe also in a weak attempt to quell the oncoming headache that I felt raging at the back of my brain, I finally came to the conclusion that even if I didn't want to involve myself in this, it seemed that somehow I already had. The least I could do now was go and talk to Stiles…let him know… let him know…
What did I need to let him know?
It's not like he'd care anyway about how I felt. There's still Lydia and even Malia eventually. Not to mention that I'll never live it down. I'll always have his look of pity, but that won't stop him from trying to be friends with me. He'd clearly shown that he at least cared about me as a friend over the time in which he's annoyed me to no ends. The others…well, maybe not them, but him… with him it was different. However, I needed to make a clean break soon. Especially before the Nogitsune took notice of me. That was definitely the last thing that I needed lurking around, but then again, how could I just do that to him when I knew what he was getting ready to go through.
As much as I wanted to deny it…I really did care for Stiles… a lot actually. He'd become…something… in my actual life, and I couldn't just abandon him; especially not now.
With another loud groan of annoyance, I quickly made up my mind that I couldn't just sit here any longer. I was going to go see him, whether the universe liked it or not. So, practically crawling out from underneath the covers, I got up and made my way over to my bathroom to clean myself off. Once inside, I made sure to throw up my hair after a nice run through with the brush, wash myself down with a clean wet rag, and then throw on a new fresh pair undies and clothes afterwards as well, because god knows I may be a slob, but I sure as hell wasn't going to smell like one. Either way though, with that said and done, I quickly grabbed my purse, and hurried down the stairs to the kitchen to try and eat something before I left.
Plus, it'd probably be good for me, and help keep me focused on the drive there. I mean, because I hadn't really been eating that great here lately, and my anxiety had been way off the charts as of late if you hadn't been able to tell by now. So, yeah, with those two combined, I'd nearly ran myself ragged, and it was clearly starting to show. In a way, I felt, and almost looked, like the walking dead; maybe not as bad as Stiles here lately, but still.
So, grabbing the leftovers out of the fridge, I removed the tin foil from around the plate, and stuck it in the microwave to reheat for a few minutes. Though, I did make sure that as I was waiting for the food to finish, to be sure and text Stiles to see if he was still even at the hospital, because wasted gas was something my mother definitely frowned upon. Plus, I think a part of me actually wanted to know if he still even wanted me to come and see him after practically ignoring him for an entire day. I think that part even thought he wasn't going to answer because of it, but to my surprise, within seconds I heard that little ding on my phone announcing me to a new message once again, and as I looked down at the screen, I quickly found his reply.
Yeah, and soon please. I'd really like to talk- StilesStilinski
I was just getting ready to reply back to his message, and ask about what, when suddenly I felt an odd sort of chill run up the base of my spine. The kind of chill you get when you know you're being watched, or when someone's lurking not too far behind you.
Suddenly, my fingers froze mid-type, and I felt my body go numb in fear. Glancing up at the window in front of me, I found nothing could be seen from the outside…however, it wasn't outside though where I found it. No, it was because it was in the reflection of the glass, and that meant that it was actually lurking right behind me with its beady little yellow eyes practically boring holes into my very own soul.
I more so heard it, than felt it, as my phone dropped from my sweaty and shaky hands, however, I think what surprised me the most wasn't so much the loud clatter it made as it hit the linoleum floor, but more so the strange amount of courage I seemed to suddenly possess at that particular second in time. Why did I find this strange? Well, probably because it was the reason why I decided to so bravely (and stupidly, mind you) turn around to face the giant soulless, black creature curiously watching from behind me.
Either way, my actions merely seemed to go unnoticed by it, as the Oni continued to observe me with what some would assume was a fascinating sense of curiosity. However, all I could focus on within that moment was the mere horror I felt at having its presence residing here within my home.
I mean, why was it here?
Why did it keep looking at me like that?
However, my question was soon answered as he suddenly reached forward, and wrapped his hand around the back of my neck. Peering into my brightly colored hazel eyes with his own little fear inducing ones, I had no choice but to stare the creature down as a sense of cold and paralyzing dread all but washed over me. It almost felt like I was going to crumble into a million pieces before him at any second, as my limbs slowly grew even icier the longer he transfixed his eyes upon my own. Though, I don't think that was nearly as unnerving as was the sound I heard in the back of my mind; one that I'm sure I'll never be able to shake for the rest of my life now.
Why? Well, maybe because it almost sounded like a young girl was screaming at the top of her lungs. It was the kind of agonizing scream you'd hear if someone was slowly being burned alive in front of you, and just that sound had me practically losing grip on reality, as my legs finally crumbled underneath me.
Without so much as another thought to me, the creature quickly pulled his hand away in a flash, leaving a strange sort of burning sensation to take over the back of my ear; a sensation that I knew could only mean one thing.
I'd just been branded… like all of the rest of the Teen Wolf cast.
Peering up at the creature from my crumpled position upon the linoleum, I saw him give me one last curious look, before suddenly vanishing into a cloud of smoke without a single trace. At that moment, is when I truly realized, just how far I'd gotten myself into all of this, and if I thought there was no turning back before…there definitely wasn't an option to now.
Shakily, at least when I was finally able to come to, I reached up to the back of my neck where the Oni's hand had once been, and felt around the area. I'll admit, nothing felt off at first, but still there was a certain frantic twitch to my actions, as I finally fumbled to grab my phone, and use it to take a picture of my neck. Within seconds, I had it held out in front of me, and was staring at nearly the same symbol as I had once seen the others wear. However, something seemed slightly off about this one.
Taking a deep breath to calm my quaking form, I slowly began to try and pull myself up off of the cold hard floor. After a few seconds of failing in that attempt though, I nearly gave up all hope, but as the anger continued to boil in the pit of my stomach at what had just happened, I suddenly felt a renewed sense of strength fill me once more after a couple of minutes. With one last attempt, I was finally able to haul myself up onto the kitchen barstool with little to no trouble.
Breathing in and out, both from the exhaustion and possibly from the rage that I was still feeling, I turned my eyes back to my phone. Without a second thought, I quickly sent the picture on over to one of my multilingual translator apps that I'd downloaded awhile ago for Spanish Class, and patiently waited for it to recognize the symbol within the photo.
Though, it didn't seem like it took all that long for it to figure it out, as it quickly popped up the translation in mere seconds.
Self?
Not just 'self,' but 'self?,'… as in a question. Almost as if even the Oni wasn't quite sure of what it had seen within me….and that….that scared me even more than the actual screaming that I'd heard.
Why?
Because now, this thing, was branded on my neck, and no matter how hard I tried to remember, I couldn't come up with an answer as to whether or not it would permanently remain there. Stupidly, I'd forgotten that little tidbit. However, as I glanced back at the picture once more, a part of me just knew that it would be from the way that it stood out so prominently against my skin. In all honesty, it looked like an actual burn mark, and last time I checked, I wasn't a werewolf that could heal from something like that.
"Shit," I groaned, as I desperately tried to rub it off like the idiot that I was, but all that succeeded in doing was irritating it even further, as the redness grew even more prominent against my already pale skin.
"God! Why me," I groaned in annoyance, before finally slamming down my phone in agitation, "This is all so stupid! Why was it even fucking here? Why would it think…"
Suddenly, my eyes grew large at the mere thought of my diary, and how it had suddenly seemed to vanish here as of late.
Could it be… no…that was impossible, right?
Then again, I'd quickly learned that in this world nothing was quite impossible, but still, why had the Oni targeted me of all people?
Was it just because I was friends with Stiles, or was it because I had done something…said something… that had evoked their curiosity. Either way, it didn't spell out anything good for me now.
DING! Ding!
At the same time as the microwave finally finished, my phone once again received a text from Stiles. Glancing at the brightly lit screen, I saw his hastily typed reply of, 'R U still coming?-StilesStilinski.'
With one last longing glance at the microwave and what it held within it, I quickly typed back my own reply as I carefully rose from my seat. Making sure that my balance was once again steady, and that I could properly walk again without the fear of falling to my knees, I hurried to grab my purse off of the counter as I made my way over to the front door. Yanking my keys off of the hook beside it, I quickly threw it open and made sure to lock it behind me as I left. Within seconds, I'd found myself practically hauling ass down the road to reach the hospital; all the while silently praying that Stiles was actually himself right now.
Arriving at the hospital a few minutes later, I found to my utter dismay a large amount of chaos ensuing around me as nurses and paramedics alike hurried to remove someone from an ambulance by the front door. Glancing at the stretcher in slight curiosity to try and see who it could possibly be, I found my eyes widening once again to the size of saucers as the shock and fear took hold of me once more. Why? Well, maybe because lying on that thin little board was in fact Scott's dad, who honestly looked like he'd seen much better days. Blood coated nearly his entire upper half, and his skin seemed almost as pale as a ghost. However, it seemed that he was at least alive from the way that I could see his eyelids fluttering back and forth in pain.
Although, I knew that this meant that the others would be here soon, but that also meant…that also meant that the Oni were here too, and Stiles… Stiles probably wasn't Stiles right now. Looking back at the screen on my phone, I debated with myself whether or not to actually believe that this message had really come from him, and if I should really even be here at all right now. However, even as I found myself questioning all of those facts, I think I already knew what my choice was going to be; simply because I knew that my heart had already won out.
With that thought in mind, I was just getting ready to make my way into the hospital when I felt a strong hand come down upon my shoulder from behind. Jerking away from the person out of pure instinct, I turned around to face my assailant only to find… he wasn't exactly an assailant.
He was Scott McCall.
The same Scott McCall who wore an almost familiar, and concerned sort of expression within his eyes upon seeing me here, but honestly, it almost seemed like there was something much deeper about that look in his dark brown orbs; something that I couldn't quite grasp at the time with all the chaos that was going on around us, but still, I knew that deep look. I just couldn't place it at the moment.
"What are you doing here? Are you alright," he asked with a frenzied, but almost gentle tone as I glanced over at the stretcher slowly being wheeled away from our vision. Nodding almost mechanically, I turned my eyes back around to face his…only to see that the concern he'd been wearing once before was slowly morphing into something that looked a lot more like fear. Why? I wasn't entirely sure at that moment, but either way, he quickly hid it when he noticed my questioning look.
"I'm fine, Scott, really. Honestly, it's more you that I'm worried about being here. What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost," I wondered aloud, as I gave him one more piercing look for his own unnerving one from earlier. Though, I knew I'd never be able to drag whatever had caused it out of him without at least putting in some effort for it, but then again, a part of me really didn't think that I wanted to know right now.
"Oh um…it's my father… he kind of got hurt. I just came to make sure…"
"It's alright, Scott. You don't really have to explain it to me. You should probably go on in, and make sure that everything's alright though. If that was him on that stretcher, then to be perfectly honest, he looks like hell. I'd be a little worried too," I mumbled while giving him a gentle gaze in return.
"Yeah, he's not good, at least that's for sure. Either way, how about you tell me why you're actually here? Are you okay? I heard from Isaac about what happened. You kind of had us all worried about you, you know. I really felt bad about the whole thing. I mean, it kind of was my fault, and I should have known that Isaac might say something to rile you up. I'll admit, he's never been that particularly good in the comforting department," Scott answered kindly, as he reached out to place his hand on top of my shoulder in a caring little gesture, one of which, I didn't particularly shy away from for once.
After the encounter with the Oni, I was still pretty shaken, and right now…well, I could use a little comfort, even if it was from him.
Letting out a defeated sigh, as the events from the entire night finally seemed to wash over me, I couldn't even stop the watery little chuckle from making its way past my lips. As I reached up to wipe away the stray tear that had stupidly escaped, I already found Scott reaching out to do so. Giving him a thankful smile for the kind gesture, I replied, "Physically, I'm fine Scott. I'm just…dealing with some stuff right now that I don't feel like particularly discussing. You understand, right?"
Nodding, Scott quickly retorted, "Well, just so you know, all of us are here for you when you do decide to. Trust me, none of us are going anywhere no matter what you've got to say. You honestly can't surprise us at this point either, but just so that we are clear about it, Stile's isn't you're only friend. I am too. All of us are. Even if you don't think so, or even want it, we'll always be here for you…"
"I don't need your pity Scott…"
"It's not pity. It never was. I just wish you'd finally see that, because honestly I think you put yourself down a lot more than you should. You're not a bad person, and trust me; I've met quite a few of them. You may act like you don't care, but we all can tell that you secretly do. You've always been there to listen to one of us rant even when you didn't have to…even when we forgot you probably needed to as well. Hell! You practically saved my life the other day at work when I nearly grabbed the wrong thermos out of the fridge. God! Just thinking about drinking Miss. Noodles pee makes me want to vomit," Scott joked with a laugh, which quickly earned him one of my own.
However, it seemed that wasn't all of his speech, as he went on to say, "But either way, if that doesn't prove that you're not a bad person then maybe this might. When Allison and I were having problems last year, and Stiles thought he was going to lose his mind running back and forth between us, you bought her a burner phone just because you thought that it might make things easier for us; not to mention the fact that you'd been saving that money for a new one yourself. Oh, and don't think I'm going to forget that one about Jackson either. Even when none of us, but Lydia, could tolerate him and his constant bullying, you still tried to help him out in chemistry by not only giving him your notes, but forcing him to sit down with you as you went over them with him. I don't think I've ever seen him so shocked in his life that someone wasn't actually afraid of him, or intimidated by his insults. Yet you still tried, because you told him that if he didn't man up, I'd be the least of his worries about staying on the Lacrosse field. Though, honestly, I think the most amazing feat out of all that is probably just you becoming friends with Stiles, and being able to keep up with his crazy little sarcasm day in and day out. Don't get me wrong, I love Stiles like a brother, but I think you're the only one who actually enjoys all of his jokes…and he's had some pretty bad ones just so you know."
With glistening eyes, I couldn't help but laugh at that last part, because one, Scott was right. Stiles might be a master at sarcasm, but sadly, when he did actually try to be funny it never really turned out that great in his favor. However, I think what probably shocked me the most about that, was just knowing how much I really did like him. I was willing to endure all of those horrible numbers just to see him smile even once. Yet, what probably actually floored me the most, was the sudden realization I had from the rest of his words. The ones where I realized just how much I cared for all of them in general; not just because they were some characters on a T.V. show.
From the sounds of it (unintentionally, mind you), I was actually willing to go to these sort of extreme lengths just to make sure that none of them had to struggle any more than they already do.
Tossing those thoughts back and forth inside my head, I felt the inner turmoil take over once more, but Scott was quick to quiet it once again with his next words as he reached out to place a gentle comforting hand upon my shoulder, "But honestly, I just wish that you'd see that none of us here are pitying you. You're strong, and you don't need pitying, because out of everyone here in Beacon Hills, you're the last person I usually have to worry about getting hurt, and not just because you stay at home all the time, but because everyone can't help but like you because you do everything you can to make sure that they are straight first…even when we know you're struggling yourself. So yeah, if anything, we don't pity you…in fact, I think a lot more of us could benefit by following your example sometimes, so please…stop putting yourself down alright. I don't like when my friends do that."
His words practically rendered me speechless, and as my eyes gleamed in shock and awe at all the things he'd said…I couldn't help but feel like the Grinch… and no, not the one who hated Christmas. No, I felt like the one whose heart that grew several sizes that one special morning. Scott had practically attacked almost every single fear of mine within a matter of seconds, and he'd tried with all of his might to fight away the doubt lingering inside of me…just like a real friend would, and not like someone who just pitied your existence.
I had been so stupid to think otherwise, and I had been nothing but stupid to let myself get this close to them, but right now…I didn't really care, and why you may ask? Well, maybe because for the first time since I woke up, I didn't feel so alone anymore. He'd made me feel like everyone was in my corner fighting for me, and that…that is what broke me.
Before I even realized what was happening, I'd already found myself pressed against him in a bone crushing hug, as I finally let all of my troubles slip away around me. I didn't even realize how many tears I'd actually shed until he finally pulled away, and went to wipe them off with the end of his jacket. Giving him a watery chuckle, as I finished pushing away the rest for him, I finally mumbled back, "Thanks for that. I think I really needed to hear it after everything that's been bouncing back and forth in my brain here lately."
"No problem. I figured that you might, but um…you can mostly thank Stiles, though. A lot of that actually probably came from him, and all of the incessant babbling he's been doing ever since that incident yesterday. You really had him worried you know," Scott replied nervously, as he turned to glance back at the hospital in front of us. I think a small part of him still thought that I might try to bolt any second from the mere mention of the twitchy little teen, however, I decided to surprise him with my next words instead, "Yeah, I know I did, and I actually regret it a lot. In fact, I just got all of his texts a little while ago. It's kind of why I'm here right now. He said he wasn't feeling well, so he thought he might check himself in. I really just wanted to make sure that he was okay. I don't like how he's been feeling here lately himself."
"You really do care for him, don't you," Scott practically blurted out in surprise, as his eyes flitted back and forth between my own; almost as if he were searching for a truth that not even I was sure of yet. However, even though every part of me fought to try and deny it, I finally found myself giving him a small grimace in return, as I eventually nodded in agreement to his curious little question. Sadly though, that only seemed to spark something inside of him, as his eyes nearly widened to the size of saucers. Then, with a silly little grin, he practically stumbled over his next few words, as he replied, "You know, he really cares about you too….like… a lot. I think he has for awhile in fact. Soooo, I don't know, maybe you two should… tell…each other… that."
Smiling at Scott's adorable little puppy-like behavior, I couldn't help appreciating his want to help me in that department. However, even if it was cute, or helpful, even I knew it still wouldn't work. None of it would actually. Mostly because I knew that Stiles already liked someone else a lot more than me, and I knew I couldn't come between him and fate. Besides, he deserved someone like her…not someone who was like me. Though, it's not like I was going to tell Scott that, so instead, I just tried to agree with him for now.
"Maybe," I finally mumbled back, as I found that heaviness slowly growing over my heart once more. However, upon seeing his agonizing look of determination to see this one thing come to some kind of fruition, I quickly decided to cut off whatever else he was getting ready to say, as I hopefully asked, "Um, if you want…I mean, while you're waiting to hear any news about your dad…you could come up with me to see him. I'm sure he'd be happy to have you there too, you know. I mean, you are like a brother to him after all… at least, from what I've gathered."
"Sure, yeah, I was actually hoping to talk to him anyway, so that works out pretty nicely too, I guess," he smiled, before finally tossing his arm around my shoulders and practically leading the way towards the double doors in front of us. Smiling, I couldn't help feeling just a little bit relieved now that I wouldn't have to face Stiles alone. Especially if…well, if it wasn't him.
Either way, after making our way into the hospital, Scott quickly made sure to locate his mother first to check on her. Once he was certain that she was alright, and that his dad was still very much alive, he hurried to explain that he was heading up to go find Stiles with me; at which point, I noticed his mother give me a questioning look. Catching this look of course, I made sure to inform her that I was one of Stiles's friends from school, and after mentioning my name in a brief introduction, I think I nearly saw her eyes light up in the same mischievous way her son's had. Thankfully though, Scott quickly caught it, and immediately decided to pull us away before she could ask about me any further. Although, I think he only did that for my sake, considering he was nearly wearing the same look as her when he'd ushered me away.
'Devious little asshole.'
Anyway, it wasn't long after that, that we soon found Stiles's room. However, upon entering, we quickly noticed his lack of presence from within. Glancing between one another in trepidation, we quickly decided to scour the halls of the hospital to try and find him.
Sadly though, after more than just a couple of minutes of looking high and low for the sleep deprived teen, we'd only come up empty handed in our search so far.
Though, just when it seemed that all hope was lost in locating him, I finally noticed that Scott had somehow managed to catch wind of his friend nearby. However, he did make sure to try to appear casual about it with me around, as he glanced into nearby rooms for the mere sake of appearances, but before long, I found him practically yanking me towards one set of double doors in particular. Upon arriving in front of it, he practically shoved his way inside, as he pulled me along with him; all the while carefully making sure that the door didn't catch on me as it closed behind us.
Looking up towards the tall teen standing in front of us now, even I could tell that something seemed almost eerily off about him. In fact, you would think that almost any sane person would with just the aura he seemed to be giving off within that moment, but then again, maybe I only assumed that because I knew what had just occurred here. I guess, I may have been a little bias if we were being honest.
Either way, nearly shaking in fear by this point, I realized that this wasn't quite the Stiles I knew anymore; at least the one who was currently standing before me right now. Why? Because even I knew that he'd never been able to remain that calm in all the times that I'd seen him before. It was almost like he'd turned into a statue, and every last bit of his twitchy little ticks had all but vanished into thin air.
This wasn't Stiles.
No….this was Void.
Yet, almost as if he seemed to sense my new and shocking little revelation behind him, I noticed him tilt his head ever so slightly in my direction.
Was it just me, or could he actually pick up on the terror that I was emitting right at that moment?
Though, I think a part of me already knew that answer, because I'm pretty sure by that point my fear was practically saturating the air around us…at least, if Scott's nose wrinkling in distaste wasn't anything to go by. Either way, with these new little whispers of change forming around the three of us, I saw Stiles carefully raise his head up in surprise; almost as if he hadn't known we were there all along.
"Stiles? You okay," Scott quickly asked in concern, as the boy in question finally turned around to give us his full attention. However, all I could see in that small bit of movement was the way his eyes gradually seemed to glance back and forth between the two of us; almost as if he were a predator eyeing his prey.
"Yeah, M'fine," he answered without missing a beat, but his dark orbs said something else entirely. These eyes…they didn't seem like the Stiles that I knew, and before I even realized what I was actually doing, I'd already found myself carefully taking a step back into Scott's side; just like any young animal would do when it felt threatened.
Sadly though, it seemed that IT had taken notice of this strange and hesitant behavior as well, because in the next second I found his eyes slowly wandering up and down my entire little frame. Though, that wasn't half as frightening as when I noticed his eyes linger just a little bit longer on the way that I clung so tightly next to his best-friend; almost as if Scott were practically my last life line. Either way, it seemed my whole entire existence merely intrigued him, but instead of pushing anymore limits, he finally decided to turn back to Scott, and ask, "What's been going on?"
Scott seemed to almost let out a relieved sort of sigh, as Stiles finally approached him in his normal friendly-like manner. However, I decided to remain on guard and wary of the teen regardless, while I still clung just as closely to the young wolf at my side.
Obviously sensing my stubbornness to relent, I noticed 'Stiles,' turn to give me a small smile that was meant to be warm and inviting, but all that did was send an icy cold chill to run up and down my spine.
Nothing about that smile seemed warm or inviting.
Plus, he knew that, and within seconds I found him raising a curious brow in my direction; one that didn't seem too happy with the reluctance that I was giving him. He wanted me to conform to his little ruse…he wanted me to believe that it was actually the man that I cared about standing before me.
He wanted to trick me.
But I wouldn't be easily tricked.
At least…not by him.
So, gathering up my wits the best that I could, I decided to play along with his game for now. Besides, I knew what his fate would be in the end, and that was enough to convince me that he wasn't quite as unbeatable as he thought he was. It even gave me enough courage that I needed within that moment to finally ask, "Are you sure you're alright, Stiles. You seemed pretty desperate to get a hold of me earlier. I was really starting to worry about you."
All Void could do was simply smile in return to my question; almost as if he were trying to analyze the very meaning behind every little syllable. However, after noticing even Scott's curious looks towards him, he went on to reply, "Yeah, I'm good. Pinky promise even. I was just… mostly worried about you if anything."
Glancing back between me and Scott once more, I saw him take in the way that Scott was gently squeezing my hand in comfort; almost as if the werewolf were trying to secretly say to me without words, "See, I told you everything would be fine."
However, relieved, was the last thing that I felt at that moment, and they both could obviously see that by the way that I'd glanced between them. So, with my heart practically in my throat by this point, I once again tried to shake the feeling of dread from slowly building up inside of me. Instead, I chose to turn to the Nogitsune, and force a tight little smile to curve across my lips, as I replied, "I'm good, Stiles. It was just a…weak moment, I guess. It's nothing to really worry about at all. Besides, Scott and I talked it all out. I'm feeling a little bit better now."
Though, I knew those last words didn't quite ring so true to his ears, as my eyes (against my better judgment, mind you) seemed to slither past him and towards the spot he'd been standing in previously; the one where a poor little firefly was slowly withering away in his wake.
His gaze only seemed to follow mine, and I knew then that I'd made the wrong move. Especially when I saw him quite literally stiffen, as he watched the bug vanish in front of us. Thankfully though, because Stiles had been standing in front of him, Scott hadn't seen this little image that I had. However, I think that was the least of my worries at the moment; at least once the Nogitsune realized this.
"You sure about that? I mean, because you seem a little…out of it," he practically mumbled through his pursed lips, before returning his gaze back to me; one which nearly caused another chill to run up and down my body once more.
This one…at least to me…almost seemed dangerous.
"Yeah, I'm sure," I nearly gritted out, before quickly going on to announce, "Well, I guess if your good, then I should probably get going. From what I've seen, it seems like Scott has a lot more to talk to you about, and I really shouldn't be out this late anyway. Mom's expecting me home soon, and I'd hate to keep her waiting up."
Yeah, Scott definitely knew that one was a lie, as he turned to give me one of his own curious little looks. However, I decided to just give him a small smile instead, as I secretly hoped that the Void hadn't picked up on that one himself. Either way, I quickly pulled away from Scott's side against my better judgment, gave his hand one last gentle squeeze in goodbye, before letting go completely as I turned around to leave.
However, before I even got so much as three steps away, I heard HIM speak out once more.
"Butterfly, wait," and before I even realized what was happening, I felt his cold clammy arms turn me around, and embrace me in a bone-crushing hug.
Part of me really wanted to believe that it was actually him, but my common sense already knew better by this point; especially when I felt his hands roam in a way that I just knew that Stile's wouldn't dare too. Practically going stiff in his arms, I simply gave him a quick pat as well, before hurrying to pull away from him as the shivers of revulsion grew even worse inside me; ones, that I'm sure, would have had me vomiting in disgust had I not put a little distance between the two us after that.
"Bye, Stiles. Hopefully I'll see you tomorrow, if you're feeling any better by then," I mumbled nearly half out of it, as he gave me a patronizing little grin.
"Right," he mumbled back, as I noticed his eyes twitch in odd sort of way.
Yes, it seemed the Nogitsune was definitely intrigued by something within me, and that alone scared me half to death. Maybe I should have tried harder to remain calm, but like I said before, it was one thing to watch it…it was an entirely different thing to see it actually play out right in front of you.
With one last sad and confused little smile thrown his way, I practically sprinted from the room, as I hurried to leave the hospital once and for all. However, if I had been smart enough to turn back around and stand my ground like I'd wanted, I would have seen the surprised looks both boys had worn when they'd gotten a full glimpse of the tattoo curved around the back of my neck.
Yet, I don't think Scott's reaction would have nearly startled me as much as the Nogitsune's would have.
Why?
Because his eyes practically sparkled with pure and utter fascination within that moment, as he slowly realized just what kind of jewel he'd managed to stumble upon. One, which he was certain, he wasn't about to let out of his sight any time soon.
Well, I hope that part was interesting for you…if not, I will totally understand. Like I said in my note above, this character literally gave me chills. However, she was the push I needed to start writing again, so I can't hate her too much right now. Either way, I've already gotten the second part written, but I still need to edit it before posting. I'm not sure when I'll be able to do that, because I am on a bit of a time crunch with my job here lately, but I'll try to get it out as soon as I can. Either way, I hope you enjoyed BUTTERFLY so far.
Besides, how can you hate sexy Void Stiles. He's just too damn sexy…even if he's evil. DAMN YOU DYLAN O'BRIEN FOR NAUGHTY THOUGHTS, BECAUSE OF YOU'RE AMAZING ACTING SKILLS! LOL
Anyway, have a nice day ya'll, and don't forget to leave a review if you can. I'd appreciate it a lot right now. LOVE YOU ALL LOTS AND LOTS!
Sincerely,
DESIREOFFANTASY
