"Good Ruck" by Tracey L Pacelli
Cheesy title, right? Couldn't seem to help myself.
So, neither Rachel or Puck belong to me, but I'm hoping to prove they belong to each other. Hope you enjoy all the gooey stuff that rolls off my fingers. If you like the opener, I'll keep it going as long as I can, so feel free to sound off.
Rachel was in a funk she couldn't seem to get out of, this time. Not even singing helped. She had dragged both her dads into the living-room, set up her makeshift stage and had just performed a lilting Streisand number—The Way We Were-to great, thundering applause. Really, could she have received anything other than undying praise from her adoring dads?
Despite the glowing kudos, and assurances that she was the most gifted songbird on earth, she still felt the weight of sadness squeezing her dry. Losing Finn to any cheerleader was bad enough, but this particular one had and always would be her sworn enemy from cradle to casket.
That red-headed witch, Kara, had Finn wrapped around her bony fingers and was positively squeezing the life out of him. How could he be so fooled by her amateurish, evil plots? Okay, this was Finn we were talking about, not some nuclear physicist, splitting the atom, but still…Rachel would swear on a stack of Mercedes' church bibles that Finn had actually become smarter since she'd met him—thanks to her brainy influence, no doubt. And, a better dancer too, even. Well, definitely somewhat smarter, anyway.
"What's the matter, Sweat Pea?" her dad who had a special fondness for plaid leisure wear asked. "You seem off kilter."
Dad number two, the perpetual perky one, who had no tolerance for unhappiness suggested his baby pick another tune, one more upbeat. "How about come on get happy?' he suggested.
Rachel had to admit, an encore was tempting, but with a firm stamp of her bunny clad foot, she answered, "It's no use. I can't ever be happy again. Not until I can find a way to get Finn Back."
Perky dad gasped at the thought that his little Streisand could be so miserable and racked his brain for a suitable solution to her troubles, while his plaid partner tapped on his bald head and waited for the universe to tap back an answer.
Rachel stared expectantly at them both through the awkward silence that hung in the air like a wet blanket. She started to exit stage left, and make a run for her room, feeling more depressed than ever, when her dads suddenly shouted in unison, stopping her in her fluffy animal tracks. "Find someone to make him jealous," they squealed.
She loved them both ridiculously much, but really, was that the best they could come up with? Still the idea was strangely compelling, somehow. While she twirled the possibilities around in her head, searching for viable candidates, she started making mental lists of all the traits her fake boyfriend needed to possess. He'd have to be hot, popular, smart, funny, he'd have to attend her school, and be crazy about her, someone who would be willing to wipe wet slushie off her face on a weekly, no daily basis, or pick eggshells from her hair, on the rare occasion. Of course, he'd have to be in absolute awe of her talent—why wouldn't he be?—and he'd have to despise that red-headed witch too and be willing to plot against Kara, for the good of all. In her mind, there was no one better for Finn than herself, and she felt utterly lost and alone without him, in a really dramatically, theatrical way.
But if she could find a guy with all those above-mentioned qualities, why would she even need Finn at all, she realized. No one like that existed in the world, let alone in her school. Someday, when she shined her light on Broadway, there'd be legions of hotties she could choose from, but for now…
"You've got someone in mind, don't you, Sweet Pea?" plaid dad said, seeing the determined twinkle he knew so well.
"Yes, I do, Dad…only…"
"What is it?" perky dad asked.
"Do you have a hundred dollars I can borrow?" she asked sheepishly.
The look of shock and outrage, respectively, on her dads' faces told her she'd have to work hard to sell this particular scheme. They simply couldn't accept the fact that not everyone got how special she was, and that her only option was to buy herself a hot boyfriend to make Finn jealous. There was really only one person who qualified. And she knew Puck's asking price would be at least one hundred dollars, if not more. But she simply had to have him.
