[Inspired by two things: The newest episode, Frost & Fire; and the kickass illustrator Illeity and his own epilogue. Check his deviantart out, and his art, srsly. Just type his name on google, FF won't let me post links here.]


Why?

Why why why why why why why? WHY!? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?

THE NERVE! HOW DARE HE!? HOW COULD HE DO THIS!? Right now I'm not outwardly raging, but THAT'S JUST FREAKING IT! WHAT AM I TO HE, SOME PUPPET OR T-TOY HE MANIPULATES TO GET WHAT HE WANTS? IS THAT IT? AM I OF NO VALUE TO HIM!? LIKE I'M ONLY THERE TO GIVE WHAT HE WANTS, IS THAT IT!? DOES HE EVEN THINK OF WHAT HE DOES AND OF WHAT I THINK? DOES HE?

UGHHHHHHHH. I WANT TO DESTROY ALL THE FORESTS. EVERYTHING. UNTIL EVERYTHING IS BURNED TO THE GROUND. EVERYTHING DEAD. DEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD! I WANT TO SEE THE GRASSLANDS TURN INTO NOTHING BUT AN INFERNAL RUIN UNTIL EVERYTHING HE FINDS VALUABLE BURNS TO THE GROUND UNTIL IT IS NOTHING BUT ASH AND SOOT!

IS THIS MY THANKS? We opened ourselves to each other. Just like when there where times when I did not understand, I WAS THERE FOR YOU! And the first time we met, I summoned up my mercy and realized what I was doing! Why would you do this to me now? Do the opposite of what I had done? I realized I was hurting people, and I was hurting you, the kindest, most purest person I met! You were a hero! MY HERO!

How could you do this? I loved you. I LOVED YOU! I LOVED YOU WITH ALL MY HEART AND SOUL, JUST LIKE HOW YOU WERE WILLING TO ENDURE THE SCORCHING PAIN FOR MY LOVE! YOU FREED ME FROM THAT LAMP, AND YOU WERE WILLING TO FORGIVE MY INSANITY, MY IMPULSIVENESS TO OVERREACT AND NEARLY DESTROY AN ENTIRE KINGDOM! I WAS A SCARED AND CURIOUS GIRL AND YOU WERE THE ONE OUT OF ALL THE PEOPLE WHO ENDURED AND SACRIFICE JUST SO WE COULD BE TOGETHER, YOU WHO SAVED THE WORLD TIME AND TIME AGAIN, BECAUSE YOU WERE GOOD!

*sob*. You were a good person. The goodest goodest GOODEST person ever. Even though I myself am made of fire, you were what kept my heart burning, you were my light in this strange world! It would only have been you that made it possible for me to grow up, to mature, to realize what I was doing, to not be evil, to care and to love the people you are closest to. The greatest thing I have ever learned was just to love and be loved in return!

You were perfect! You risked everything for me so that I would not DIE! Even if the kiss was what nearly killed me, it was you who jumped deep into the earth, you who chose to endure the flames for my love, i-if only- if only to save the girl you would have loved until death! How could I ever dream of anyone else like you? *snf* I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I...

I...

*snf* I c-c-can't get you off my m-mind...you helped me build shelter when I felt alone and lost. You taught me how to control myself and be rational in the dungeons. You were a keeper! YOU WERE THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE OF ME! I WAS A RAGING WRECK AND YOU CALMED ME. I MIGHT HAVE HAD TURNED EVIL BUT YOU LED ME SO THAT I WOULD BE ON THE SIDE OF GOOD! YOU WERE LIKE A BLESSING FROM GLOB HERE TO SHOW ME THE WORLD AND BECOME A BETTER PERSON! AND YOU SUCCEEDED! I MAY BE SCREAMING INWARDLY, BUT YET CAN'T EVEN LEAD MYSELF TO BURN A SINGLE STALK OF GRASS WHEREVER I TREAD!

THIS IS WHY I SUPPORTED AND LOVED YOU! I PUT YOUR BET WITH YOUR BROTHER OVER MY EMBARRASSMENT IN FRONT OF FAMILY! AND LIKE HOW YOU ENDURED EACH BURNING TOUCH OF MINE, I ENDURED EACH AND EVERY DRIP OF WATER THAT RELIEVED YOU OF THE BURNING PAIN AT THE EXPENSE OF MY PAIN! I DID MY BEST TO LEARN FROM YOU NOT ONLY IN THE DUNGEONS BUT WHENEVER I COULD, AND IMPRESS YOU WITH WHAT I COULD DO! YOU SAW MY SKY WRITING WHILE I BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF ICE KING, AND THIS IS WHAT I GET IN RETURN?

NOW YOU USE OUR DEEPEST MEMORIES JUST TO MANIPULATE ME INTO FIGHTING ICE KING FOR YOUR SICK DESIRE? MY HAIR IS BAD, MY FEET AND MY CANDLES STINK, HUH? AND YOU USED THAT KISS, THAT EXPLOSION, ONE OF THE MOST CRUCIAL MOMENTS OF MY LIFE, WHERE I COULD HAVE DIED IF NOT FOR YOU, JUST TO MANIPULATE ME INTO GETTING INTO A RAGE AGAINST ICE KING? AND BERATE ME FOR NOT BEING ABLE TO KISS YOU WITHOUT THAT HAPPENING AGAIN? DO YOU NOT VALUE WHAT WE'VE BEEN THROUGH? WHAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH? DO YOU!? W-W-HAT AM I T-TO YOU!? WHAAAAAAAAAT!?

Oh glob. *sob*. I-i-i-if o-only you were here. Look at m-me. L-look at what y-yo-you've reduced me to. A wreck. You've completely destroyed the best year of my life. I had everything! A home, freedom, and my beloved! My beloved who was the greatest example of purity and goodwill that I had ever seen in my entire life!

Now you completely erase that image of yours in my mind. YOU'RE A HYPOCRITE! A MANCHILD WHO ONLY THINKS IN BLACK AND WHITE, WHO CARES ONLY FOR HIMSELF AND HIS DESIRES, WHO THINKS SORRY IS THE WAY TO EVERYTHING! A DOUCHEBAG WHO DOESN'T VALUE WHAT WE'VE BEEN THROUGH! A...A...

No. No! no no no no no no no no no no no NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! It's IMPOSSIBLE! This can't be you! This is the complete opposite of everything I know of you! I KNOW you're a good person! Not this...UGH! A douchebag, a prick, a manipulative piece of crud, a...a...AAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHH! How could you do this! You've BETRAYED me! You've betrayed my trust, you've betrayed my love, and you've betrayed YOURSELF! YOU! THE "HERO" OF OOO! THE "HERO" WHO DEVALUES HIS GIRLFRIEND'S EXPERIENCES AND FEELINGS! THE "HERO" THAT ONLY WANTS HIS DESIRES SATISFIED! HOW CAN I TRUST YOU WITH MY HEART IF YOU'RE WILLING TO USE THE MEMORY OF MY FIRST KISS WITH YOU TO MANIPULATE ME? Y-you...y-y-you...call this GOOD? YOU WERE THE ONLY PERSON I TRUSTED! THE ONLY PERSON I TRUSTED WITH MY HEART AND SOUL!

N-now I'm just alone. Alone in this world, no one to love me, no one I could love, no one to...

*snf*

Finn said we were the good guys. Me included.

But if this is what good guys do then...

I don't want to be good.


I blew it.

I frickin' blew it.

I...

What have I d-done?

No. No. No no no no no no no no no! Oh glob! No! I'm sorry! I beg you! Please! Listen to me! I'm begging you! *snf* No! Please! I said I was sorry! I'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm...

AGGGGHHHH! I BLEW IT! I FRICKIN' BLEW IT! PLEASE DON'T DO THIS TO ME! DON'T LEAVE ME!

*sob*

This...this isn't me! I'm GOOD! I'M GOOOOOOOOD! This isn't me, I would have never done this! I can't have done that! I didn't just destroy my relationship with her! She was the girl I loved, the girl I would have died for if only to save her, the girl I sacrificed pain for, just to love her! She was what filled my heart, what kept me happy, knowing there was someone who I loved, and who loved me, and who I would never betray!

But I've done just that! These weird dreams and feelings, these emotions, these impulses and desires, her...PLEASURING me...even if it was a dream, it messes me up. Aaaaaaaaaaagh. What have I done? This is evil! I'm turning evil! This is the Cosmic Owl's fault! This is Jake's fault! This- this...

No. I can't blame others for what I've done. This is purely my fault. It's the evil in me coming out. No...how could I do this? I broke her trust, I used something close to her, I manipulated her into doing my own dirty deed! I'm corrupt! I've let my most disgusting traits come out! I lusted for her, I wanted her, I wanted to see her, if only to satisfy myself! Those danged dreams! How can I be good if I break the goodwill of other people? To use them, and to cut deep into their heart? All these for my disgusting desires! I ignored her feelings and only let mine be important to me! Now I nearly got Ice King killed as his kingdom melts, and just ruined what was between me and her! All because it felt good! I'M SICK! I'M DISGUSTING! I'M...UGH!

What does she think of me now? I thought I was there to help her, to help her in this world, far away from her imprisonment in the Fire Kingdom. To turn her good. To love her. To care for her. And now I turn out to be the complete freaking opposite! An immature boy who runs on impulses! Unknowing of what others would feel! I'm 15! I don't wanna be a child anymore! I shouldn't be like this! I should know what's right and wrong!

But noooo, I decided to pursue my lust instead! I didn't give her love, I only wanted her for the dream, I wanted her making me feel good, I wanted her flames, her body on me! I can't look myself at the mirror knowing I wanted that and did what I could to achieve that, without even thinking of what would happen! I got off on seeing her do those things!

To her I'm a villain now, someone you must hate and stay away from. I'm a villain! I've surrendered my goodness and purity! I've disrespected her, the person I loved the most, now look at me! I F#%!^% BLEW IT! I'M GUILTY! I BETRAYED HER. I'M NOT A HERO! I'M NOT GOOD!

*sob*

Why did I do this? Why did it destroy so many things? It broke everything! It broke all my beliefs, it destroyed the Ice Kingdom, and it broke her heart! Now what do I say to her!? The only thing that's coming out of my mind right now is sorry! She won't listen to my explanation! What else can I do!? Flame Princess! I won't do it again, I promise! I promise with all my heart! I won't let that evil come back into me again! I promise I won't betray your feelings and your trust ever again! It was because of my stupidity! Please, please let me make it up to you! I can never forgive myself for this! Please don't leave me! Please!

Please...

I can't trust myself if I break the trust of others, can I? What's the use of my sorries? She'll never forgive me for this. I'll never forgive myself for this. If I can do this, who knows what else I could do? I might go on to betray the trust between me and my brother! Or PB! Or Marceline! I can't...I can't let myself fall deeper into this. I shouldn't. That would be the death of any more goodness in my heart! This is like the horizon of a black hole, and I can't and I mustn't let myself fall in!

Sigh.

*krrg*

Oh hey Pbubs...you need me for what?

Yeah, I don't have anything planned.

I'm free.


He blew it. He just blew it. Yep. Blewpity blewpity blew. Kaboom. Whapow zap booooooooooom. That's the end of it. Nothing left but a couple of broken hearts and my kingdom melting. Hey! There's grass underneath the ice! So I'm actually in the grasslands! Hah! That just gives me an idea! I should freeze the rest of the grasslands and turn his treehouse into part of my kingdom! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Wait, where was I?

Um...

Oh yeah. Finn. How stupid of him. He's just like Party God, uncaring of the people he loves! Oh, now look at what he's done. He manipulated his girlfriend just so he could...well, I don't know. He just made her fight me! And now look what's happened! Not only did he break her heart, he's melted my kingdom! MY KINGDOM! Oh come on! Sure it may have been her who melted it down, but HE's the one who goaded her!

He's not so above it after all! Hero, huh? Oooooooh, I trick my girlfriend because I'm a hero! Oooooooh, I nearly get everyone in the Ice Kingdom killed because I'm a hero! I'm good, ooooooooh! Pah! And then he says 'But I said I'm sorry'! Yeah, dream on kid. You're...ugh...I don't know how old you are, but you've really got to stop being so childish, man! No, sorry isn't the magic solution of life. No, people have feelings too, they're not just there to do what you want! You're at a worse position than me, really, you've actually made it into love and then you make it go crashing down like an asteroid until nothing is left of your relationship! I may be rejected all the time, but at least I know deep in my heart there are people I love and who love me! Like...uh...

Which people love me again? I can't...um...

Oh yeah! Marceline! She...well, I don't remember why, but I trust her, and she trusts me! And I...think I had a wife...but I can't remember her! Wait, her name's on the tip of my tongue...uhm...

Pah, I don't know what's wrong with me sometimes. Anyways, we had one thing in common! Trust! I trust them, they trust me, we trust each other...trust is important! To be trusted is a greater compliment than being loved! And what did you do? Sputter sputter sputter...crack...WHEEEEEEE...BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM. Like a plane falling from the sky. You broke that trust. You don't manipulate people you love! Suuure, I kidnap princesses, but I only want to show them my love! I don't manipulate them into doing my dirty work!

This isn't the way to treat people. That's a foul. You've crossed the line. You wrote that letter to make me angry, you think I stink and I'm unpleasant and unfunny and I'm way too old and no one will ever marry me...you don't think that hurts? I don't know why, but deep down in my heart, there's this feeling...this feeling that I used to be different. Like something. I still cry about it. I cry about something I don't even remember. We may be kinda frenemies but don't you start thinking that I'll just let you get away with just everything you say! You're gonna grow old too, you know. And kinda change, like probably losing your arm or something. And it's even worse when you're as old as Ooo, you know. It may be only the now I remember, but I remember that I've been here even before your parents' parents' parents' parents' parents' parents' parents were here or something! I'm alone! Only Gunther is with me! No loves me! Well, besides Gunther and Marceline and that wife I think I had and that island lady as a friend or...well, you know.

I pity Flame Princess. I can tell she's kinda easily enraged, she's young and inexperienced about the world, and now she has this douchebag boyfriend putting what he wants over the feelings of others. Listen girl, I know I'm just talking to myself in my mind, but I hope you'll be able to find someone who will really care for you. Someone who never betrays your trust, someone who takes others' feeling into account, someone who doesn't use you...you're a child Finn's age. I'm as old as this world we have and I've seen so much heartbreak I can't even REMEMBER THEM ALL. Don't let yourself become me and become stuck in all your problems. Either you move on from him and tell him exactly what you feel, or give him a second chance, ask him why he would do that, and try to be willing to forgive him. If you could though, that's really far-fetched.

That ain't something good. That was evil. You're becoming like me, Finn. We should join forces and conquer the world! Mwahahahahaha...wait, where was I again?

Ugh, it's this crown. Whenever it's off me I go off thinking a lot more than normal about myself. And even without it I see things all the time, and whenever I start thinking like this my head gets overloaded!

Well, at least this water feels good.

Sigh.

Huh? Who...oh. It's- ugh, I still feel kinda off. That fight really hurt.

"Hey Simon, I moved all your stuff to the bottom of this cave, alright?"

Wha-?

"I'll check up on you from time to time. I know, I know, it's not much..."

Oh, it's Marceline. Ugh that hurts...hmm, what's this?

"But it's home."