Disclaimer: I do not own super Mario video games, merchandise, or television show that is as old as the hills.

Prologue:

An awkward cloud of silence was enveloping the entire High School after the mysterious disappearance of Daisy two months ago. The last time I saw her there was something metallic clipped on her yellow mini skirt, it had a blinking red light. I remember ignoring it… Until the next night it happened. Okay, maybe I don't exactly know what happened. BUT, I do know that she hasn't been in school or out of the castle that is covered with quarantine signs. Luigi was heartbroken when Daisy vanished and I kind of felt sorry for him. You are probably wondering who I am. Well, I'm not going to tell you what my name is! Okay I will, BUT only if you promise not to go all " Ahhh! It's Bowser!" What do you mean I just did? Whatever!

Anyway, Mario and I have been best friend ever since he took me from the pound. I went everywhere with him even at school and he even trusted me with all his secrets, including his huge crush he has on Princess Peach. I have to admit he was a dork and no where near as cool as his brother was. You see, Luigi was the most popular kid at school and sits at the lunch table with all the preppy girls. Mario on the other hand sits at a table with me, him, and some guy named Yoshi. But the only reason why I'm humoring him with this little "Pet" thing is so I don't have to go back to the pound, and because I'm the only friend he really had. But that was all about to change.

One day we were eating lunch like any regular day, Mario, put his tray on the table and opened his carton of milk. " I forgota' the straw! Bowser can youa' watch mya' tray?" Mario said in his Italian accent. He left leaving his tray on the table. I heard a loud farting noise that I knew could only be caused by none other than Wario. Waluigi his brother quickly ran out of his seat. I glanced at his table watching him cackle. He was holding some kind of remote control. I don't really trust Wario ever since Daisy called him a blimp in eighth grade he just hasn't been the same. Meanwhile, Yoshi stuck his long tongue out and slurped his entire plate of spaghetti. Mario came back and his face frowned in disappointment when he found his tray empty. " Ia' toldya' to watch mya' tray!" Mario shouted.

But before he got to say anything else Peach walked by and he lost his ability to speak. " Uh, Mario? Mario!" I shouted pinching his arm. " Mama Mia'." Mario whispered. " Mario you're drooling all over the table." I said. He finally snapped out of it. " Were you about to say something?" I teased knowing he forgot what he was lecturing about. " I remember I wasa' mad abouta' something. But when I went to say the rest she took mya' breath away." Mario exclaimed. I rolled my eyes. I had my elbow on the table and my chin on the palm of my hand, also known as the "I don't care, why the heck are you telling me this?" pose. " Should Ia' weara' my cap ona' backward ora' forward when Ia' see her?" Mario asked. I shrugged, an easier question would have been " Doa' youa' wanta' barf in a'Yoshi's luncha' baga' ora' do you a'wanta' a'barf in the garbage can?" I didn't find Peach at all attractive and I seriously don't know what in the Mushroom Kingdom he sees in her, she's so annoying with that voice, UGH! She makes it all high to sound all "Cute" but it really knocks everyone off their butt like a koopa shell!

When school was over Mario and I were walking down the street. I heard this really high pitched scream coming from the sky. Mario and I looked at each other.

" Peach!" We both said simultaneously, only Mario's voice sounded worried and mine sounded unenthusiastic. All the student's eyes were practically glued to the sky. Wario was kidnapping Princess Peach in a yellow helicopter. Donkey Kong was sitting in the back of the plane with a big barrel. " Now!" Wario shouted. Donkey Kong tipped over the barrel and banana peels fell from the sky. The brainiacs in the school weren't smart enough to walk around the banana peels so just about everyone was slipping all over. Mario and I weaved through the banana peels.

Just when we were about to give up running Donkey Kong grabbed Wario's yellow cap mistaking it for a banana. Just for the record, bananas don't have the letter W written on it… Anyway, Wario tried to grab his hat dropping Peach out of the sky. She quickly grabbed a tree branch. Mario jumped up in the air trying to get up the tree. I told him I'd give him a boost and he climbed on my shoulders and he leaped grabbing her leg and she safely hit the ground. All the students cheered for Mario and carried him around as if he were an Olympic champ. Peach kissed his lips and his face turned a really bright shade of red. But then I looked over his shoulder noticing a metallic thing on her dress. I tried to knock it off with my claws and accidentally tore her skirt off. Peach started screaming and dropped Mario. By the way, Peach is a lot taller than Mario, you see, he hasn't really had his growth spurt and I don't think he ever will on a count of he's sixteen and he's about a foot tall. " What's'a gotten into youa'?!" Mario shouted.

" Peach was in trouble… and…" I tried to say. " Thanks to you!" Peach said.

The next few days were rough for me. Mario and Peach were dating all the time and he was spending less and less time with me. Not only that, the girls kicked Luigi out of the lunch table so Mario can sit with him, and all they talk about is how dreamy his Italian accent is, he's never even been to Italy he lives in Mushroom Kingdom! So Luigi is now sitting with Wario, Waluigi, and Donkey Kong, he calls himself DK, probably because he can hardly spell Boo let alone his own name. That's pretty much Donkey Kong in a koopa shell. So now our table, that doesn't fit in any of the social groups is one person short. Me and Yoshi don't hang out very much because I can never understand a thing he said. But I was lonely so I decided I could try to talk to him. " So, uh how are you?" I asked. " Weeep?" Yoshi chirped. " What?" I asked. " Weep!" He chirped again. " I don't understand what you're saying!" I said. Yoshi stuck it's tongue out and snatched my apple. " Yoshi!" Yoshi said. So pretty much I threw in the towel about being friends with Yoshi.

About a week later I doubted that Mario knew that I even existed, until he asked if Peach wanted to go over our house to watch a movie. That night they sat watched a movie as I made popcorn. When I handed out the popcorn and sat on the couch. " Oh, why are you letting that beast on the couch?" Peach asked. I glared at him daringly. I can tell Mario wanted to get rid of me so they can smooch on the couch. He tossed my Frisbee. " Goa' get it." He said pretending to play fetch. But I was in no playing mood. " No, you go get it!" I said. " What?" Mario asked. " Noa' youa' goa' get it!" I shouted. He did as I said.

After Peach left he said I was an embarrassment and he was tired of having me around. So he pretty much disowned me. And me and Mario were enemies ever since… But I always knew he was good, he just, I don't know. I guess he just is so gaga over Peach he forgot everything that really matters in life.