why did it have to be like this? why dose she continue to plauge my thoughts? these are the questions i am continuously asking myself these days.
"she was only 26 why kami did you have to be so cruel?" i yell to the heavens while picetures of a beautiful, happy, carefree girl run through my head.
we had only just begun a new life together and she had been taken from me too soon a cruel twist of fate the.
kami's are laughing at me i think as i close my eyes leaning against the old well that had brought her to me.
i sit here every day just hoping and praying that she might pop out of it like she used to,
but that seems like so many years ago now time had taken her from me and i would never get her back.
as i sit i remember that horrible day with such clarity it almost scares me.
'flashback'
"promise me one thing, make sure miri knows i love her" she says as she starts to cough again her lifes blood pouring out of her mouth.
"no you will tell her yourself you will pull through this" i say tears forming in my eyes but i wont let them fall i have to be strong for her for our baby girl.
"no we both know i wont and lord sesshomaru has already brought me back once it wont work again" she says as she cries letting the tears that i cant shed fall.
"please dont leave me i need you miri needs you" i beg "we just got rid of that damn naraku we where going to start a new life with our family"
"please dont be sad its my time and you need to be strong" she says looking around with pleading eyes at our friends and our allies i see everyone is crying except sesshomaru "please cant you do something" i ask.
"no i cannot the miko was correct the sword only works once" he says turning and leaving then but i swore i saw a tear of regrette in his eye.
"its my time my love" she says bringing my attention back to her.
"no not yet please" i say "shhhh all will be well i promise" she says putting a hand on my cheek and starting to sing.
When she got the news The phone hit the floor She fell to her knees and cried his name He had just kissed her lips And both of the kids Their lives will never be the same At the end of her hardest day The only words she could say were
Chorus:
I want you to live, I want you to love I wanna go back to the way it was To hear you say my name again I wanna see your smile again I want you to live
Takes all of her strength to go through his things It feels like she s holdin him again The letters he wrote the books that he d read and some of the shirts still have his scent The picture in Florida she holds to her heart and cries out loud
Chorus:
I want you to live, I want you to love I wanna go back to the way it was To hear you say my name again I wanna see your smile again
Bridge Lying awake in the middle of the night Trying not to let the kids hear her cry She prays for answer or some little sign She closes her eyes and swears she hears him say
I want you to live, I want you to love I want you to go on and not give up I want you to live, I want you to try I want you to know that I m alright I want you to fall in love again I wanna see you smile again and again I want you to live
as she finishes she gose limp in my arms and i shed the tears i have been holding back as i start to rock back and forth screaming her name and cursing the kami's.
even after she has long gone cold in my arms i wont let her go.
it isnt until i feel a hand on my shoulder do i stop "come on its time to go home miri needs you now" inuyasha says tears still streaming down his face.
and it ocures to me in that second that he still loves her.
"yes its time to go home" i say standing up with her still in my arms "do you want me to carry her?" he askes
"no i will do it" i say still not ready to let her go just yet.
as we start home i look back only once to what remains of the cursed hanyou "burn in hell naraku" i wisper on the wind befor turning to head to a place that i call home but it just dosnt feel right without her.
the ceremony was short with so few speaking of her the wounds still to fresh the hell we where living in very real for the first time.
as her ashes are place in the shrine we all start to cry once more for the loss of our dear friend.
miri suprises everyone when she stops crying wipes her tears away, steps forward and says
"i love you so much mommy but i know you dont hurt in heaven so please just watch over us" and its hard to believe that she is only 4 years old when she knows so much.
i start to cry again as she come back and clings to me as i hold her tight.
'present day'
as i come back from reliving that day i look out on the fields and watch our little girl play and its hard to believe that she was all grown up with kids of her own.
"im so tierd" i wisper "dad are you ok?" she asks as she appears at my side as if she knows its my time.
"im ok dear just tierd" i say "its ok dad i know" as she pulls me into a tight hug she says "i remember when mom tought me this song all that time ago"
"Wind blowing on my face Sidewalk flying beneath my bike A five year old's first taste Of what freedom's really like He was running right beside me His hand holding on the seat I took a deep breath and hollered As I headed for the street
You can let go now, daddy, you can let go Oh, I think, I'm ready to do this on my own It's still a little bit scary but I want you to know I'll be okay now, daddy, you can let go
I was standing at the altar Between the two loves of my life To one, I've been a daughter To one, I soon would be a wife When the preacher asked "Who gives this woman?" Daddy's eyes filled up with tears He kept holding tightly to my arm 'Til I whispered in his ear
You can let go now, daddy, you can let go Oh, I think, I'm ready to do this on my own It's still feels a little bit scary but I want you to know I'll be okay now, daddy, you can let go
It was killing me to see the strongest man I ever knew Wasting away to nothing in that hospital room You know he's only hanging on for you That's what the night nurse said My voice and heart were breaking As I crawled up in his bed and said
You can let go now, daddy, you can let go Your little girl is ready to do this on my own It's gonna be a little bit scary but I want you to know I'll be okay now, daddy, you can let go, you can let go"
"go be with mom and say hi for me will you?" she says as the tears are streaming down her face as she holds me.
"i love you miri" i say "i love you too daddy" she says its the last thing i hear as the world gose black.
"miroku i have been waiting for you my love" she says her arms wide open.
"kagome" i gasp rushing to her and swinging her around her laughter like a bells and heaven to my ears.
"you havent changed one bit" i say after breaking our kiss.
"neither have you" she says laughing as i grope her beind "miri says hi" i say
"our little girl is all grown up" she says taking my hand and leading me towards the gate of heaven"she looks so much like you you know" i say.
"i know" she says "and we can always watch over her now"
the end
