My name is Mondo Oowada. I'm 17 years old, and tomorrow I'll be going to Hopes Peak Acadamy. Before I go, I want to write as many things about my late brother that I can remember, before I forget it all. I need to remember somehow. For a future reference, in case I have kids or something, or when I feel like thinking about my Aniki. Anyway, here goes.
It's been a year since my brother, Daiya Oowada has passed away. He was killed in a motorcycle crash, because I was driving recklessly on the night that he retired from the head of our biker gang. He was 25 years old, around 6'2, had brown eyes, and black hair that he always styled in a pompadour. He was the best brother anyone could ever have.
He used to baby me a lot, and I didn't learn to walk until I was 3 because he would always carry me around. I have very little memories of my father. I barely remember his face. Although, I do remember how he died. He was an alcoholic, and he would come home late and beat up my mother. Daiya would always try to get me out of the room, and distract me so I wouldn't have to listen to my mother being beat up. He'd sing this one song to me, but it was in English, so I couldn't understand what he was saying. I remember some of the words, though. It went something like, "There were bells on a hill, but I never heard them ringing, no, I never heard them at all, till there was you." And that's all the lyrics I can remember. Daiya didn't have the best singing voice, but it was nice, it was really soothing at the time. I'm not sure if this is true or not, but I've heard my relatives talking about Daiya KILLING my dad, but it can't be true. Daiya would never hurt anyone. Today, I kinda think about it, and now that i put some thought into that theory, it might have been true.
When I started junior high, my mother was sent to rehab. We stayed with an uncle during that time, who was no good, either. We lived in his shabby apartment in the ouskirts of Tokyo. I think Daiya was around 16 years old, but he dropped out of school to get a job. He worked part time as a mechanic, and then a second job at a gas station. At that time, I didn't see him that much. I wanted to drop out, too, but he wouldn't let me. It didn't really make that much sense, either. I was failing all my classes, I didn't have any friends, the teachers hated me because sometimes I would skip and smoke cigarettes behind the school. One day, Daiya got me a puppy. It was some kind of terrier, and I named him Chuck. I felt really bad because, well, I felt like a really big burden. Daiya was always working, and my no-good uncle was always at a bar with his no-good friends. I always came home alone, no one was home. It was kind of lonely, but Chuck was always home, so he kept me company. We both waited for Daiya to come home. Sometimes, my uncle didn't even to bother to come home. I didn't mind. I didn't wanna see his lousy face anyway. The last time I saw my uncle, though, was the night that me and Daiya left. My uncle came home one night when Daiya was working an extra shift, and he was mad. I didn't know what he was mad about, but he started to beat me up. I tried not to cry, because it's very unmanly to cry. But then, Daiya came home and started beating my uncle up. He punched him in the gut and the face, and was kicking him over and over again. I've never seen my brother that mad before, he was FURIOUS. He knocked him out in a few blows, and after he was unconscious, he gathered all our things. As we walked out, Daiya spat on him. We stole my uncle's car, and we drove to Asakusa. The first night, we slept in the car, and the next day, Daiya rented us a room in a motel. They wouldn't let dogs in, so we had to sneak Chuck in. Daiya was still really mad. He called our uncle a "Stupid son of a bitch." I didn't know what that meant at the time.
A few years later, around the time I started high school, we got our own place. It was a small house, but we were really happy. I made some friends in the new school I moved to, and Daiya quit both jobs and got a better one that pays more. One thing I remember is that he liked to dance when we would clean. He was into classic rock music, so there would always be Beatles or David Bowie playing in the house. He didn't really know what the songs were saying, but he sang and danced along with them anyway. His personality was coming out, and those were some really happy days.
I started thinking for myself those days, as any teenager would. I hated that we had to live this way. We were basically orphans. I couldn't be greedy, I had to be grateful with the things we had. We're our only family, we only had each other. It was so hard not to be frustrated. I'm living a shit life, with my brother who decided to butt in on my uncle beating me up. If he had never butted in, we would have never been struggling to live on our own. I didn't realize it, but I was blaming the one who saved my life. Daiya made my life a living hell, but then again, if it wasn't for him, I wouldn't have been where I am today. I was annoyed with everything he did. The way he liked to dance to "Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band" while he was cleaning, the way he styled his stupid pompadour, the way he called me 'Baby', I hated it. I couldn't really explain why, but he was the source of my problems. I started to rebel against him. One day, I didn't come home from school. I hung out in the downtown area where we lived, and I smoked and drank in the alleyways. I cursed at the other delinquents passing by, I cursed at everyone. I was pissed off at the world, I was pissed off at my life. I started to think about my mom, and my dad, and my piece of shit uncle. What did I do to deserve this shitty life? I remember that I started to cry. I cried like a baby. Right there in that alleyway. A few guys thought it would be funny to call me a 'pussy faggot'. I didn't bother to fight back. They kept pushing my buttons, but I kept telling them to fuck off. One of them got mad, and started kicking me. He knocked me to the ground, and all of them joined in. I didn't say anything. I just cried. I guess I blacked out or something, because I woke up back in the house. I've been meaning to ask Daiya what happened. He didn't talk to me for days. It didn't seem like he was upset with me, he was just really silent. I told him "I love you", and he said "I love you, too" back. That was all the confirming I need. Our bond was stronger from then on.
I remember when Daiya first brought his first motorcycle home. It was strange, because out of all people, I'd never expect my own brother to get a motorcycle. He didn't even know how to ride it. His first attempts at it were hilarious. He would sit on it, starting the engine to quickly, and fall off, landing on his ass. He kept trying. No matter how hard I would laugh my ass off. After a good 3 months, he told me something crazy. I thought he was insane. He really lost his mind. This dumbass wanted to start a Biker Gang. I had no choice but to go along with it. It wasn't a complete bad idea.
He called up all his buddies from all over the country. In a matter of days, all kinds of tough dudes were showing up on our doorstep. Small, tall, burly, kinda skinny, but COVERED WITH TATTOOS. It felt like walking into one of those saloons in the movies. They looked tough, but they were all really cool. They all ADORED Chuck, it's like they lost 80% of their manliness when Chuck walks into the room. Possibly one of the coolest group of people I've met. Not that I've met that many people, but you get the idea. Later on, Daiya got me my first bike. One of the most beautiful bikes I have ever seen in my life. I remember I couldn't stop thanking him for a week.
We first drove to Shibuya. The first I've ever been to the city. I never knew how I would feel at peace driving on a mobile transportation device that could kill me while driving along with 30 other men. After we basically went sight-seeing, we drove back at around three in the morning. Daiya still sent me to school afterward.
Our gang was a successful gang, we gained over one hundred members. By then, we were a huge horde of men driving around in our Harley-Davidson's. I started to admire Daiya more. He wasn't just my brother anymore. He was the head of The Crazy Diamonds. (me and Daiya came up with the name by combining our names. Pretty clever, right?) I admired everything about him. He was brave, strong, good looking, basically the perfect older brother. I was the luckiest guy in the world. For some reason, however, he never had a girlfriend. He would hit on girls all the time, and invite them over often, but he never stayed comitted. I asked him one time about that, and he said, "You're the only lady in my life right now.". Good Ol' Daiya.
Time passed, and Daiya was turning twenty-five. He was growing up, and he knew it. That day, he told the whole gang he was going to retire. I thought that was complete bullshit, he was still pretty young, but I guess that was his decision. He was handing down his leader title to me, his second in comand. I was honored, but this was a big decision. I was sixteen, I didn't deserve all that responsibility. He said I was ready. I didn't know what that meant, I was still unexperienced, and still a kid. He insisted, and I couldn't decline. I guess it was kind of an honor. That night of his retirement, everyone treated me like a king, giving me the uttermost respect. I digged that. I guess I was being too cocky, because I challenged Daiya to a race. He really had no choice but to say yes, we Oowada men couldn't say no to a challenge. And so we raced. I was a better biker than I thought I was, I was going faster than I could ever imagine. Of course, I was right behind Daiya. I was being reckless, and I started to drive side to side, trying to find an opportinity to pass my brother. What I didn't realize was that I was driving to the other lane, and there was a huge truck coming my way. I couldn't move. I tried to move to the other lane, but I couldn't. I was frozen. I can still remember the loud horn coming from the truck, warning me to get out of the way. The truck was coming closer and closer, and I couldn't move. I thought I was going to die. I closed my eyes, awaiting death. Instead of feeling the large hit in front of me, I felt a hit from the side. I fell off the road, but I still heard something hit the truck. A loud shatter. I didn't want to believe what I was thinking. I didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to believe it. I looked to the road, and all I saw was blood. It hurt. It hurt everywhere, and I couldn't cry. I cried anyway. I crawled over to the road again, the truck stopped, and the head lights were shining on what was left of my brother. My brother. He didn't look like he was breathing. He just laid there, not moving. God, there was blood every where, I wanted to puke. It just makes me wanna puke by thinking about it. He was crying, too. I called his name to see if he was still there, I hoped he was still there. I couldn't live without my brother. He grunted, and said my name. I started to breathe again, and I went over to him. I held his red body, he was losing a lot of blood, and I knew he wasn't gonna make it. He knew that, too. He told me to keep the gang together, and that it was a promise as men, and that it wasn't my fault. He told me he loved me. He was silent for a long time. He was gone. Daiya was gone. I'd never see him again. It was all my fault. This was all my fault. I killed my brother. I killed my best friend in the whole world. I started to scream. I couldn't believe it. I fucked up. He could never forgive me. I'm the worst person in the world, I should've been hit by that truck, I was asking for death. He's done so much for me, and I threw that all away. I'm ashamed. I'm the scum of the Earth. I should have died.
