A/N: Will and Alicia.I couldn't stand watching the tension between Will and Alicia and not writing about it. I'm writing from 4x14, Red Team Blue Team. What happened in the show so far happened in this story. Please review!
If you want to see new dialogue and new scenes I created, start at the end of chapter 3 :) That's where I take matters in my own hand.
Summary: Reliving Red Team Blue team and after that. Starting with the scenes we know, but new scenes will pop up quickly! This chapter is Will's point of view.
To Keep The Good Alive
Chapter 1 – Be Careful What You Wish For
"You just might get it."
This is ridiculous. Unacceptable. "Excuse me!" I burst out. "This is nothing like a real court experience!"
"That is because you're not addressing me as the plaintiff!" Alicia snaps at me.
"The only reason you know what his daughter's name is because he's our client," I continue to argue. We look straight in each other eyes. I hate this. But she's crossing a line here. Way over.
"That would happen in court Mr. Gardner, He would be-"
"Quiet! Please! …I have to go the bathroom," Lyman cuts us off, stands up and leaves the room.
I sigh and quickly look at Diane, shaking her head. "They're crossing a line here," she mumbles at me. I nod. "I know." I watch Alicia and Cary bursting out the room, agitatedly talking to each other.
Diane sighs and leans back in her chair. "This is wrong. We made a mistake. I understand she's upset but this is highly unprofessional."
"You talk to Lund," I reply. "I need a few files from my office."
There are no files left but I just need to get back to my office and think this through. In the past couple of days, I completely lost track of what I am to Alicia and what she is to me. It's incredibly intertwined, wrong and confusing. I want to treat her like anyone else but I can't. She knows it wasn't up to me to delay partnership and still I am the one she's blaming. Or at least she's taking it out on me in court. She hasn't addressed Diane like that. She got emotional and she lost track. She thinks I'm playing her but in the end, she's playing us. Me. And not just in court. Meeting with our top clients, it's outrageous.
When the elevator doors slide open I want to head to my office, but as I walk I hear a door and realize Alicia is on the floor as well. I'm trying to keep my cool but realize that I can't and I turn around, heading to her. I see her standing over her desk, sorting out files. I need to get this out of my system.
I burst into her office. The glass door shuts behind me. "You got a problem, you bring it to me. You don't take it to court."
"What? I'm a lawyer. You asked us!" She's on fire.
"We asked you to take this seriously." I reply.
"I am taking this seriously!" She snaps at me.
"You're losing us a client."
"That's not my fault!" She steps away from her desk, closer towards me.
"IT DAMN WELL IS YOUR FAULT!" I yell in her face, taking a step closer. I'm raging with anger. Suddenly I'm losing control.
"Well, then TAKE US OFF OF IT, FIRE US! GET RID OF US!"
"O that's what you want huh, these meetings with clients, is that what this is about?" I'm practically spitting the words in her face.
"O my God! Listen to yourself Will! You are not the injured party here!" She yells back, looking straight in my eyes.
"O what, and you ARE?!"
"I AM!" "YES!" She shouts back at me.
This just became way more personal.
I'm trembling. I don't know what to say. I just realized how close we are to each other. There's a reason why we don't get together this close anymore. It arouses me. It arouses me so much that it makes me lose control. My heart is throbbing in my chest. Her eyes are locked into mine and I look at her lips, her mouth half open.
Then I lean in. I kiss her, softly at first, pulling her closer towards me. She instantly responds, with confidence. She presses her body against mine. She moans softly, encouraging me. Our kiss intensifies. She's insistent and strong and it feels so good I forget what was going on before. My hands wander off to her hips. I want to touch her all over.
Then something snaps me back to reality.
I drop my hands and step back. Immediately regret what I did. What we did.
"Dammit," Alicia mutters, shaking her head. O no. What just happened. "No no no no," I stutter. Before I can do anything to stop her, she's already halfway down the hall. I want to say something. Stop her from leaving but I don't know what to do. She looks upset as she walks out. I didn't mean to do that. I shouldn't have. I step out of the office but stop myself from going after her. I can't make it better. I then hear the sound of the elevator and the doors close. She's gone.
I let out a deep sigh and sink down in her office chair. I hold my face in my hands, rubbing my eyes. This is why we shouldn't be this close. I lose control. We both do. It seems unavoidable. I shouldn't have walked into her office like that. I ambushed her. I startled her and that's not what I want.
No matter how great those few seconds felt, I wish I had never felt that again. I can still taste her lipstick on my lips, her scent on my cheeks, her hand in my neck. Now I'm longing for that even more. And I won't get it. This triggered something and it wasn't supposed to be triggered ever again. I'm never that emotional around anyone. I don't get that angry and I don't get that aroused. And now that I tasted her once more, I won't be able to get her off my mind.
/
Later that night, I fell asleep on the couch, watching some baseball and drinking beer. I tried to forget what happened and I wanted to start fresh today. Now that I'm sitting in front of her again I realize that's not going to happen. My thoughts keep wandering off to her body and her lips. The physical attraction is so strong that I wish I could pull her out of this room right now. I've been staring at her all morning. Every time she looks back I look away, pretending to be paying attention to the papers in front of me.
"Excuse me your honor. Objection!" Diane looks at me. Shit, that was my cue. I can't get myself to do anything. I just want to stare. And go home.
"May we approach the bench?" Diane asks.
I don't even bother to get up. From the corner of my eye I can see Alicia is slow in getting up as well. We both don't want to stand next to each other. It seems unavoidable. What happens next is incredibly awkward. Reluctantly, we walk up to the bench. I feel terrible as I see how uncomfortable Alicia is next to me. And so am I. It's this unbearable combination of being uncomfortable and arousal. Even when we're not touching, I can actually feel her and it doesn't feel right. I try to lean towards Diane as much as I can. I don't even hear what Lyman is saying.
"Step back," is all I register and that's my cue for getting back to my chair as soon as possible. This is going to be a long day.
/
Hours later the end is in sight. "Ok. Then make a deal. Twelve million. Enough with these morowns," Lund decided as he stands up and leaves the room.
I'm so glad this day is over. I couldn't care less about this deal right now. I'm not myself. We're standing next to each other once more.
"Will. Can we talk for a minute?" Alicia asks me. Although a part of me wishes she wouldn't approach me, I'm glad she did. We should talk.
I quietly follow her back to the room where we practiced court. She looks down, seems to think of what to say and looks up back at me.
"I was offered the sole equity partnership." She starts.
"I know, I heard," Is all I reply.
"This didn't have anything to do with—"
"No. No." I interrupt her. Of course not.
"Are you sure? Because I—"
"Alicia." I interrupt again. "Pat yourself on the back. You're good. This is because you're good."
She smiles. "OK."
I feel bad for her, even thinking that this had to do with last night. I look at her, she looks incredibly insecure. I hate to see her like this. I feel awful and I never want her to think that again. While looking at her, I think of what to say. I quickly decide that I need to tell her that it won't happen again, but she's ahead of me.
"What are we gonna do?"
I just shake my head. "I don't know…" I swallow. "It was a weak moment."
She nods. "I know."
I feel that I'm getting emotional. She's giving me a look, clearly asking me to answer her question. We need to address it and we need to address it now. While I'm thinking of what to say my feelings for her are growing again. The tension is crawling back in my body.
But I cut it off on time.
"We should avoid being alone together," I manage to get out of my mouth. I already regret the words while I'm pronouncing them, but it's the wise thing to say. I don't want to. But we should. I said the right thing. When I finish the sentence I feel a cold sensation running over me. I feel bad already.
Alicia nods."Yeah." It sounds unconvincing. For a moment I think I see disappointment in her eyes. That it's not the answer she hoped. But she corrects herself quickly.
"OK." I just say, ending the conversation. Now I just to want to get out of here. I barely look at her, turn around and want to get out of the room.
"I'm sorry Will," she suddenly says.
"About what?" I ask, turning back around.
"Oh I don't know. What am I not sorry about?" She laughs.
It makes me smile. I like it when she laughs. "It's life." I answer. "We're in constant danger of running off the road." And with that I leave.
Walking back to my office, I can't help but think that I wish we could run off the road. It's a selfish thought. We tried it and it didn't work. There's no way it ever will. Realizing that makes me sick sometimes, lose my appetite. It makes me bitter. It gets worse after a kiss like that. I was almost over her, at least as much as I'll ever be. But that kiss recharged me. My whole body yearns for her. I can still feel her hand in my neck; my skin still tingles there. I still feel her lips on mine. It's driving me crazy. But I need to come to terms with the fact that this is what it's gonna be. It's not going to be any different.
To be continued...
Reviews much appreciated, thank you so much :)
