"Its him.." she shouts.
"Thank the Maker"
It was only then that she realised how much she had meant it. Cassandra realised she was thankful not because the Herald was still alive and able to continue their fight against the darkness, but that he was being returned to her. Never had she begged and pleaded so much to the Maker than she had that night. Andraste must have delivered him from danger on two occasions now. Thank The Maker.
"Please don't let him be dead"
Cassandra cries out as they trample through the deep snow towards the figure of the Herald. The storm whips around them making it difficult to see but they can see that he is laying face down with a thick layer of fresh white covering him. Cassandra reaches him first dropping to her knees next to him rolling him over onto his back. She looks down into his face seeing no sign of life. The Seeker tugs at the clasps of her coat tearing it from her body wrapping it across The Heralds chest and shoulders trying to give him any shelter that she can.
"Herald" Cassandra says just loud enough for him to hear, if he could hear her. Her voice wavers as she reaches out to him desperate to feel the solid flesh and bone of the man and know that she wasn't dreaming seeing him again. Her hand finds his face, feeling the cold skin beneath her palm from his exposure to the elements. She trails her fingers to press them against the space under his jaw feeling for the solid beat of his heart. When she doesn't feel it she panics and moves her hand to his mouth and nose to feel for his breath. When she feels a small breath against her palm she lets out a sob.
"I've got you" She says to her Herald.
"He's alive! Help him!" She shouts to Cullen and two of Cullen's men. They lift him up from out of the snow, supporting his weight with their arms trying to keep him off of the cold floor. Cassandra brushes the snow from his cheek watching his head roll back.
"We need to move, Seeker" Cassandra pulls her hand away hearing the soft tone of their Commander, a small blush rising in her already wind burnt cheeks. She feels Cullen's eyes on her, waiting for her to say something. Cassandra didn't care if he'd noticed her moment of weakness; she knew everyone was already whispering about them and their spending so much time together. All that mattered at that moment was him.
"Cassandra.. We need to get him somewhere warm.. We need to get him to Solas"
She manages to direct her attention to the blonde man for a moment before slipping back to looking at the Herald, her Herald. She bites her bottom lip gently nodding, trying to compose herself. Her heart was beating so loud she was sure that the Commander could hear it. She was just being silly, she decided. She barely knew this man and it was far too soon to be feeling so.. Attached. She had been denying her feelings for him from the start, protecting her heart at all costs. Cullen and his men quickly fashion a way to carry the Herald using one of their cloaks and carrying a corner each. Cullen shakes his head when Cassandra reaches out to take the fourth corner and she notes that he carries the majority of the weight himself. Cullen is a good man, she decides, and a good friend to the Herald. The short walk back to the camp through the snow and howling wind seemed to take forever. The Herald must have seen the glow of their camp and the promise of warmth and safety just before he had passed out. When they were nearing camp Cullen sent one of his men ahead to warn Solas and the Healers that they had found the Herald and he would need some attention. When they entered the camp a quick bark of orders from Cullen and they were heading towards the tents.
"They've found him!" The shout is almost drowned out by the roar of the storm but suddenly the camp is alive with activity and movement. Crowds of people rush to them, some trying to help carry him through the makeshift settlement, some trying to set eyes on him to see what state he has returned in. Cassandra squeezes her way through the gathering crowd trying to keep up with Cullen and his soldiers and not lose sight of the Herald.
"Please, let us through" Cassandra shouts as the noise gets louder and more people appear following the shouting. She links her fingers through the Heralds squeezing his hand tightly desperate to not have him too far away from her.
"Move!" The sound comes out as nothing more than a squeak as she is jostled further away from him. The Seeker reaches out grasping for any part of him to hold onto, desperate to not be dragged away in the wrong direction by the crowds of on lookers. "Cullen, Wait!" The people are every side of her and everyone is starting to try and get closer to see what's happening. She ducks around a group of former merchants and spots Cullen looking back to find her in the crowd.
The Herald is carried through the flap of a tent and out of sight leaving the group of residents to form a barrier around the entrance. Cassandra is finally shouldered out of the way by a large blacksmith and feels herself falling.
"THE LADY SAID, MOVE!" Cassandra is caught by two strong hands under her arms and steadied back on her feet. The Iron Bull is suddenly there, parting the crowd for Cassandra with his sheer size and gently pushing her out of the chaos.
"I need to see him" Cassandra says firmly trying to see a way through the people. "I need him to know I'm here" she continues rubbing her shoulder where she had been shoved. "What are they doing?" she asks angrily.
"Morbid fascination Seeker" The Iron Bull replies "Or unconditionally adoration for that crazy bastard" he adds trying to get Cassandra to understand she isn't the only one that is glad to see The Herald. He guides her through the crowd and towards the parting in the front of the tent. Cassandra looks up at him about to offer a thanks "He needs you, Seeker"
Cassandra pushes her way into the tent letting the flap fall back into place. She can hear the low rumble of Iron Bull's voice telling people to keep back and let them 'do their work'. She was suddenly glad for the Qunari's presence and knew there would be no more disturbances with him stationed outside. With a quick glance around she sees that Solas is already there and has already begun work on the Inquisitor. Cullen stands nearby, a look of concern making his brow crease.
"Cassandra, are you alright?" Cullen asks looking up from his bedside vigil. Cassandra just nods to him moving past to stand behind Solas. The Seeker looks down at the Rouge who remains still on the makeshift bed.
"Just avoiding the wolves at the door" Cassandra mumbles. Solace gives her a quizzical look hearing this comparison when he notices that she has joined them in the tent.
"Lady Cassandra, he is alive" Solas begins; light blue flares sprout from his fingertips and working their way over the Herald. "He will live. The Herald has been exposed to the elements," he continues as a bright blue flash fills the otherwise darkened tent.
"I thought he was dead" She replies quietly. Haven was gone; the Herald had done everything he could to save everyone from the destruction. They'd fought off the Red Templars and given everyone some time to escape but it hadn't been enough. Cassandra squeezes her eyes closed tightly trying to stop the tears. The last thing she remembered was seeing him face the Dragon and an explosion. The Herald had pushed her out of harms way telling her to run and had stayed behind to defend them all. Cassandra remembered trying to run to his aid only for The Herald to tell Dorian to get her away from there, and then nothing. When they had searched the rubble of Haven and not found his body she had assumed the worst. Cassandra would never forget the pain of having to leave there without him and the shame of everyone seeing her cry.
"His mark has changed. Something happened when he faced the Elder One. It appears he has been given the ability to create Fade Rifts" Solas examines the Herald's hand closer, turning it over and touching it with his long pale finger.
"I don't care about the mark" Cassandra spits, annoyed that the Elf would be so insensitive and only care about the magic that was involved, not the man laying in front of him. "All that mark has done is bring him pain, that mark and magic almost lost him his life"
"Magic, Lady Cassandra, and that mark may be all that kept him alive" Solas replies in a nonchalant tone. "I have done all I can it appears" Solas replies coolly climbing to his feet. "He needs rest. I will check on him again" Solas moves past Cassandra to leave. Realizing how rude she had been Cassandra grabs hold of his arm.
"Solas..I.." Cassandra begins, knowing her words mean nothing to the Elf. "I'm sorry, thank you for what you have done" Solas bows his head in acceptance of her apology and leaves muttering 'vhenan'ara' under his breath shaking his head.
Cassandra waits until she is sure the elf has gone before dropping to her knees next to the Herald. She lets her eyes wonder across his face noting how peaceful he looks now some of the colour has returned to his face. She sniffs slightly trying to keep herself under control. The world had almost lost its only hope of survival against this enemy and found him again before anyone had even thought of the consequences of his death. Cassandra felt numb, she hadn't had chance to consider the idea of the Herald not being in her life but she had mourned him as she imagines a lover would mourn the loss of a love. But they weren't lovers; they were just The Seeker and The Herald. Two people forced together to solve everyone else's problems. Cassandra takes his hand again in both of hers bringing them up to rest against her chin. She drops her head quietly reciting a prayer to the Maker.
"My Maker, know my heart " she prays, "Take from me a life of sorrow. Lift me from a world of pain" she sobs pressing her head against her closed hands.
"Judge me worthy of your endless pride" Cullen finishes for her "I'm sure he knows you are here Cassandra"
She suddenly remembers that the Commander is still there with them and that he has just witnessed her actions. Her training as a Seeker had taught her to always be strong, be vigilant to not let her emotions get the better of her. The latter one she always seemed to struggle with. Her trainer once told her that she was too emotional and would rush into things without considering the outcome of her actions. That is why she had tried hard to guard her emotions and not let people through the defenses that she had built to protect herself. Cassandra knew that people thought she was cold hearted and a hard woman, but in reality she didn't know how much more pain her heart could handle.
"I hope you are right Commander"
"I was thanking the Maker when we found him too" Cullen comments as he places his hand on her shoulder giving her a reassuring squeeze. Cassandra knew that Cullen believed in the Maker and that his upbringing taught him the importance of Religion and the Chantry, but she had not thought about his feelings of losing the Herald at such a crucial time.
"Thank you Cullen"
"I.. didn't mean to pry" He says as he walks to leave the tent. Cassandra sees how awkward he must be feeling not knowing what to say to her. He ducks out of the tent without another word leaving her alone with the Herald. Cassandra sighs looking to his face again wishing it was a pair of big brown eyes looking back at her, not this shell of the man she knows. She tugs at the animal skins that are laid out over the end of his camp bed and pulls them up over him, hoping to give him some more comfort and ensure he stays warm when the wards Solas cast have worn off. She sits on the edge of the bed resting her hand on his chest, now able to feel the beating there getting stronger.
"I thought I'd lost you Herald" Cassandra says quietly to sleeping figure. "I so wish you would wake up and explain to me what I am supposed to believe now" she sobs. "Why would the Maker let us believe you were sent by Andraste?" Cassandra looks away whipping her eyes on the back of her hand. "I thought you were sent to save us. My faith has never wavered and yet I was punished when Haven fell" she sniffs again before hiding her face in both of her hands sobbing. "I am punished and tested and still I thank the Maker for giving you back to me and showing me where you lay"
"It was you that found me.. Not the Maker" The Herald croaks, his throat and mouth still dry from his ordeal and lack of use. Cassandra turns lifting her head, shocked to hear him speak. With tears brimming around her eyes she reaches for a water pouch helping him sit up to drink.
"I don't like to see you cry" He says when he has finished drinking. He brings his hand up to her face wiping a tear away with his thumb. She turns her face into his hand enjoying the feeling of being close to him.
"I thought you'd left me" Cassandra says suddenly finding it hard to tell him how she had been feeling. He rubs his thumb against her cheek again making her remember how soft she had always thought his skin was when she had the chance to touch him.
His brown eyes meet hers "I would never leave you" he begins Cassandra smiles weakly knowing there was a lot that was going to be left unsaid between them.
"I should get Solas. He would want know you are awake," Cassandra says making a move to stand up. Lord Trevelyan catches her hand in his stopping her in her tracks.
"Stay with me" the Herald whispers "Please.." Cassandra looks over to the entrance to the tent and then back at the Herald. She was certain that there would still be a crowd of people outside and the others would want to know he was awake but she couldn't bring herself to leave him. As much as she had suffered, the Herald had gone through a physically and mentally brutal few days since the destruction of Haven. She had no doubt that he was blaming himself for what happened and not wanting to be on his own.
"You know they will talk" she says with a snort settling herself back beside him.
"Let them talk. We both know the whole of Haven liked to gossip about my intentions towards you. I assure you Lady Pentaghast, right now my intentions are entirely innocent. I am exhausted and request only the comfort of your company until I can sleep again" This makes Cassandra laugh quietly covering it with the back of her hand. He leans back again propping himself up on the bundle of furs, patting the space next time.
"Maker help me" Cassandra whispers quietly as she climbs into the space next to him. He wraps his arm around her drawing her closer to his side. Being in his company was definitely a comfort to her too and it was nice to not have to think about what was going on outside of the tent for a short time. Cassandra rests her head against his shoulder as they sit in comfortable silence for a while. The Seeker knows she is in a dangerous place with The Herald allowing this familiarity with him but like a lyruim addict craving their next hit, Cassandra craved his attention and he hers.
"I missed you" The Herald mumbles resting his head against the top of hers. "I thought I would never find you again" he says sleepily "I was scared you hadn't escaped Haven, I thought I was going to die never getting to see you again" he finishes reaching for her hand, she links her fingers through his as he begins to slowly drift back into a healing slumber. "I believe it is you that was sent to save me Cassandra"
Cassandra tries to stifle a yawn herself, the events of the last few days catching up on her. She would close her eyes just for a moment and enjoy the warmth of the man next to her. It was healing for them to be back together and she would be denying herself the first peace she could achieve and have for days. Cassandra turns her body to him making herself comfortable, but only for a few moments.
-
"And what happens if he doesn't wake up Commander?"
Cassandra awakes hearing raised voices. She looks around her unable to pinpoint her location and not recognizing her surroundings. She blinks a couple of times noticing that there is light coming from outside the tent showing that the lanterns have been lit in the camp. It must be full dark out there by now she decides. It is only when she tries to sit up does she realize that the warm weight that is holding her down belongs to another person, and that person is the Herald. The few moments that she had decided to allow herself to sleep had obviously turned into a few hours and the pair had found themselves moving into comfortable sleeping positions wrapped around one another. Cassandra gently lifts his arm from around her waist.
"He will wake up, Leliana"
"His mark is the only thing that can close the rifts"
Josephine, Leliana and Cullen were obviously close by and it sounded like hey had been arguing for some time. The Seeker looks to his face to check the Herald hasn't been disturbed with her movement. When she knows she is safe to move again she sits up, swings her legs out over the side of the bed and stands up. She glances back to him once more seeing that the peaceful expression that he had earlier while sleeping has returned.
"Oh.. Cassandra"
Cullen squints into the darkness when he sees the Seeker standing in the Herald's tent trying to see if it really is here. Josephine and Leliana suddenly appear at the door too, looks of surprise on their faces too. Cassandra lifts her finger to her lips indicating for the other advisors to be quiet. They nod and back away letting her out of the tent.
"I was just checking on him" Cassandra starts, ignoring the accusing look from Josephine and the knowing look from Leliana. Cassandra knows Josephine has a thing for the Herald, but has already convinced herself she is more interested in his family status than anything else. Cassandra spots Mother Giselle sat by the fire reading from a scripture. "Mother Giselle?" She looks up from her reading, "Would you sit with Lord Trevelyan?"
"Of course Lady Seeker" she smiles getting to her feet. She pulls back the flaps of the tent pinning them back to let some fresh air into the Herald's tent. "I will watch over him for you. I am sure you all have much to discuss" she smiles again leaving Cassandra to walk away with the advisors.
"He was awake" Cassandra says turning to Cullen, Lelina and Josephine.
"When did this happen?" Leliana asks pointedly
"We need to talk to him" Josephine starts to move back towards the tent. Cassandra steps in her way blocking her. "Cassandra, we need to know what happened. What did he see? What has happened to the mark? What did this Corypheus say?" she says with a huff.
"He needs rest, can't we do this in the morning? He's sleeping. He doesn't need all of these questions." Cassandra snaps back at her. The idea of more people disturbing the Herald bothered her, even if it was her fellow advisors. "If you had any idea what he's been through.." Cassandra says her voice filled with emotion. "Do not ask this of him now"
"Our forces need answers Seeker" Leliana says softly trying to keep the situation between the four calm. Cassandra could understood that but she still didn't want more commotion like she witnessed when they first found him.
"They will get them, when he is ready" She says finally stomping away from the Heralds tent to the centre of the camp. As she guessed the three follow her, all demanding some answers of their own. At least they would be out of earshot now and less likely to disturb him.
"What would you have me tell them? This isn't what we asked them to do" Cullen says raising his voice slightly. Cassandra understood that his men would want to know what was going to happen now that they really knew what they were up against. Corypheus was a complete unknown and they had already seen what he was capable of. "If we can't face him.."
"We cannot simply ignore this. We must find a way" Cassandra replies. She had no idea what they were going to do now but she knew The Herald would know. They couldn't run away from this, he would find them.
"And who put you in charge?" Cullen snaps back at her, the strain clearly plastered all over his face "We need a consensus or we have nothing" of course he was right, the four of them had always butted heads over most decisions. "If we can't agree then maybe we should disband. We can all go our own ways and try to keep out of this"
"Please we must use reason. Without the infrastructure of the Inquisition, we're hobbled" Josephine pipes in trying to calm the situation.
"We need a unified Inquisition with a unified leader. We need a figurehead but.." He starts "It can't come from nowhere" Cullen shouts. He was a military man and needed order, not spies, secrets and political support.
"She didn't say it could" Leliana adds.
"Enough!" Cassandra shouts, finally hearing enough of the arguing. She hoped the survivors of Haven weren't paying attention to their leaders squabbling. "This is getting us nowhere" Cassandra sighs looking back towards the Herald.
"Well we are agreed on that much" Cullen says finally as the four move away from each other frustrated that they are unable to agree. Maybe Cullen was right, while they were together they were a target for Corypheus. As soon as he found that the Herald was alive he would be coming for their blood.
"Shhh.. You need rest" Mother Giselle says quietly seeing that The Herald has awoken.
"They've been at it for hours" The Herald says sitting up on his bed looking through the camp to his friends and advisors. He spots Cassandra and immediately feels sad for her. Her faith was being pushed to the limit and now she was facing something much worse than any of them could have ever imagined.
"They have that luxury, thanks to you" Mother Giselle says trying to sooth him "The enemy could not follow, and with time to doubt we turn to blame. Infighting threatens as much as this Corypheus" she adds with a sigh.
"If they are arguing about what we do next, I need to be there"
"Another heated voice wont help, even yours, perhaps especially yours. Our leaders struggle because of what we survivors witnessed. We saw our defender stand, and fall, and now we have seen him return." She says to him noticing that he looks longingly at Cassandra. The Herald sits up placing his feet on the floor "The more the enemy is beyond us, the more miraculous your actions appear. And the more our trials seem ordained. That is hard to accept no? What we have been called to endure. What we perhaps must come to believe"
"I believe but it didn't help.." The Herald replies shaking his head. He stands up walking to the edge of the tent leaning his arm against the wooden supports to steady himself. Cassandra leans over a makeshift war table pretending to be studying a map. She clenches her fists in frustration wishing she knew what was going to happen to them. Cassandra sees that Leliana has taken a seat on the floor and is staring into the fire, tired of the arguing. Josephine sits silently on the bench mulling over everything that has happened. Cassandra glances at Cullen who is rubbing his neck anxiously avoiding eye contact with everyone. Cassandra sighs; they were going to have to work together if they were going to survive this.
"Shadows fall and hope has fled.." Mother Giselle begins to sing, she sings in a voice so sweet it makes Cassandra blink back some tears. The Seeker looks up from the table to where Mother Giselle has come from and sees The Herald standing watching her.
"Steal your heart, the Dawn will come. The night is long and the path is dark.. Look to the sky, for one day soon. The Dawn will come.." she continues getting the attention of the others in the camp. Cullen turns to see what is happening and then at Leliana when the bard joins in.
"The Shepard's lost and his home is far.." Leliana sings. Cassandra looks at her companions when finally Cullen gives in, closes his eyes and joins their song. The sound makes Cassandra shiver hearing the raw emotion being let out through the song and sees that quite a crowd has gathered now and they are uniting their voices. The sound increases until they are completely surrounded by the reassurance that the words are bringing them. She watches The Herald move from his spot and work his way around the camp. Cassandra smiles wearily seeing that the survivors of Haven needed to heal too after what had happened and this was the start to show that they were unified and stood together with the Inquisition.
"Herald" Cassandra whispers when she feels him move to stand behind her. He places his hands on her shoulders slowly moving them down her arms making her tremble under his touch. She turns her head to look at him her eyes meeting his.
"Steal your heart" The Herald whispers placing his mouth against her ear "The Dawn will come" he sings quietly to only her. Cassandra takes his hands wrapping his arms around her waist as she leans back against his chest. "I promise everything will be okay" he continues turning her around to face him. Cassandra nods throwing her arms around him again letting him burry his head into her shoulder.
"A word?" Solas says interrupting their moment together. Cassandra lets go of The Herald and steps away from him wishing the Elf had picked a better time to appear. She crosses her arms looking disappointed.
"Of course Solas" The Herald replies. Cassandra returns the smile he gives her and closes her eyes as he cups her cheek in his hand. He gives her cheek a small brush with his thumb when she places her hand over his. He turns to follow Solas but Cassandra keeps hold of his hand firmly.
"Herald.." she begins to voice her fear of him being out of her sight and the thought of him not returning to her. He turns to look at her again, his eyes searching her face for what is worrying his Seeker. "Just, make sure you come back" she says letting go of his hand.
"Always" He replies suddenly stepping back against her, taking her face in his hands pressing his lips against hers. The Seeker melts against him smiling against his mouth; it was definitely everything she had hoped it would be and more. Solas snorts behind them, unsure if he approves of the situation unfolding. Cassandra sighs when he lets her go. "Let me just ditch the Elf" he whispers.
"I can hear you. It's the ears," Solas says dryly walking away with the Herald following after him. Cassandra smiles happily watching him get further away from her knowing that he would always come back.
"The Dawn will come.." She sighs.
