A/N:First ever fanfic, up in here! Alright, so, I wrote this while I was vacationing in Mexico - so, firstly, they might be freakishly cheesy for a while. Secondly, the chapters are really short, so I'm gonna be combining a lot of them - I'm not sure how long it will turn out once it's done. Thirdly, I wrote them in a notebook, so, depending on my lethargy, I will either upload them really fast until I need to start writing again, or take forever (probably) for me to upload. At first, each separaty-thingy (0---0)will represent a different chapter. Yes. Some of them are paragraphs long. Also, it gets better, so hold out - or skip a few chapters, you'll probably not miss much xD. Ok. Enough ramblings. Without further ado, enjoy!
PS. No, I don't own VaLVE, Portal, or anything else. Except the crappy characters in here – you'll know them when you see them.
After being released from the Aperture Science Enrichment Centre, Chell grabbed the Companion Cube and ran. She ran, trying to keep her terrible memories out of her head. The corn scratched and whipped at her bare arms and legs. The only parts of her which weren't screaming in pain were her feet, covered by the impossibly comfortable Long Fall Boots. You had to hand it to Aperture - they knew how to make a boot.
Ignoring her pain, her exhaustion, and even the time of day, Chell kept running ever forward. She was running north, she realised, as the sun set on her left. Not that it mattered, at all. Life before the facility was a mystery that could not be solved by her amnesia-riddled, brain-damaged mind. She had no idea what awaited her once she finally left this seemingly-endless field. She just had to leave - to leave her memories behind her and simply solve the problem behind her.
Aperture really was her mindset now.
As the night's sky cracked in half with the first rays of sunlight, Chell's legs collapsed under her
Her eyes drifted shut and she
could no longer feel the corn pricking uncomfortably through
her orange jumpsuit…
0-0
Daley stolled along the edges of Dutton Farm. The Duttons really had had their fortunes handed to them on a golden platter. Their ancestors from long ago had been farmers and had discovered this gorgeous, seemingly endless field of wheat. Luckily, the Duttons were neither greedy nor selfish, and shared their good fortunes with the entire village. It was 'Public Property' and anyone could wonder in and out whenever they pleased. Even Daley, big walker that he was, had never reached the other side of it. Nobody minded - they would leave it to its peace.
Why bother disturbing the natural flow of things, right?
Daley checked his watch. 7am. Everyday, he took a walk through the field and got back for noon. Then, he would go and eat lunch with his friends - and whoever else wanted to join them.
Why bother disturbing the natural flow of things, right?
He walked on, an ever loyal admirer of natural scenery. Eyeing the cornfield, stretching on into infinity, he wondered if it didn't just keep on going forever.
Shrugging, Daley kept strolling, never straying from his usual path so as not to disturb more crops than he needed to. His mind was lost in a daydream until he reached the end of his path. Frowning, he shielded his eyes from the bright, September sun and checked his watch. Sure enough, it was 9:30am. That was strange. He didn't feel like he had half finished his walk. In fact, he felt like he had barely begun. Hesitantly, he thought something that he had never thought before.
Why NOT bother disturbing the natural flow of things, right?
After all, you only live once. If you keep the same routine, day in, day out, it's going to get boring.
So…
Mix it up?
Taking a cautious step forward, he had to crack a grin. He couldn't believe that he had never rebelled against his day to day routine before. And it felt great.
Daley stormed forward through the corn, his beam a permanent fixture on his browned, bearded face.
0-0
Wheatley sighed a deep sigh, irritated and bored. He tried - as he had about a thousand times already - unsuccessfully, to tune out the annoying observations of the so-called 'Space Core'. Yes, they were in space. Yes, the core's first name was Space. No, he doubted that he could even imagine the intense happiness that the Space Core felt.
And apparently, the little orange-opticked core had met up with his folks, and all.
Which was nice.
Wheatley supposed.
Probably.
He tried to distract his mind and found himself in a metaphorical face-to-face with his worst memories.
"You never caught me! I told you I could die, falling off that rail, but no! You never even tried! All you wanted was some poor, gullible sap to get you a portal gun, and get the hell out of here!"
Her face was full of determination, shooting portals here and there to grab those little soul-suckers and hit him with the bombs. He glowered at her. How dare she ignore him? How dare she weave past the bombs and try to hurt him? It was all she ever did.
Eyeing her face, Wheatley realized something.
No, it wasn't.
He saw her expression. Determined, he had already established - not determined to kill him.
Determined to survive. Through the pain. The exhaustion. The… fear?
And suddenly, for a tiniest inkling of a second, he felt evil.
That feeling was quickly destroyed by another wave of that euphoric corruption which swept over him, and he upped the bomb count being hurled at her annoying, stupid, annoying, traitorous form.
It wasn't fair to expect her to catch him, was it? He sprung it on her at the last minute… didn't he?
She had tried to catch him. Searching his memory files, he saw this - right before he smashed to the ground. Ouch. Why did pain always come up in memories?
Another memory.
Worse.
This time, he hurt her - and not just mentally.
"Don't press that button!" he screamed. The bombs! She would die! Why was she ignoring him?
It. Was. All. She. Ever. Did.
He finally saw a look of hesitation as she swung her gaze up to meet his. Her look said, How could you do this? What happened to you?
'Press that button!' came a tinny shriek. Of course, she would listen to her best friend.
It.
Was.
All.
She.
Ever.
DID.
It was just like before…
But the sides had switched.
Chell turned from Wheatley, shooting first a portal above the Stalemate Button, then below her feet. As she slammed her palm down onto the button, bombs exploded next to her, causing her to land in a crumpled heap underneath a hole in the roof.
"PART FIVE! BOOBY-TRAP THE STALE-MATE BUTTON!" He laughed dementedly. Her portal gun skitted across the floor, just in her reach. Wheatley stared at her, expecting her to get up for an hour-long microsecond.
She was dead. What had he done?
A wave of corruption, like a tsunami, wiping out a city of sanity.
She was dead!
Chell's eyes flickered open. She struggled to her feet, now more blood and bruises than pale pink flesh.
"WHAT? ARE YOU STILL ALIVE? HOW... IS ... THAT... POSSIBLE?"
Grabbing her portal gun resolutely, the cogs of her mind turning in perfectly clear time, she knew that there was a solution.
Why?
There was always a solution, no matter how impossible the puzzle seemed.
"SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR PRECIOUS, HUMAN MOON! BECAUSE THIS IS THE LAST TIME YOU'RE EVER GOING TO SEE IT!"
Turning her head towards the sky, she saw it.
The solution.
The moon.
Moon rocks.
Moon gel.
The moon.
Swinging her portal gun upwards, Chell shot a violet blue portal in an arc squarely to the sky.
For three seconds, she was sure that it didn't work - that she would die.
She saw a violet flash on the surface of the moon.
She felt the cold vacuum of space pulling her closer and closer to the amber portal on the floor by Wheatley.
s1d2g"Let me GO! I'mtgt234d0 connected, I can d1f2g3h45ahs
"I already fixed it!"gsdhfjclkxsq10293485tg "And you are NOT coming back!" ae34r5udhas3oewfjo9"wait no hang on to mewertyg2135 grip
/System Crash Repaired/
Wheatley blinked his optical receptor. His mental circuits were wracked with guilt. What if she had died? What would he have done then?
Reveled?
Or been left in abject horror at the sheer realization of what he had done?
He hoped the latter.
He feared the former.
What would She have done to him?
One thing was certain.
He was relieved that he was out here, rather than in here.
0-0
GLaDOS was fuming slightly.
GLaDOS was plotting something.
That was all you could pick up in the huge, underground facility. Lower life-forms (and weren't they all, compared to Her?) scuttled nervously, ever trying to avoid the focus of Her wrathful glare. Woe betide you if you went against anything that She believed - in fact, woe betide you if you did anything at all that would spark her attention.
Spark being the operative word.
Right on cue, a bird exploded in midair, sparks flying out and incinerating any signs of its previous life.
Atlas and P-Body eyed one another nervously as their elevator slowly trundled upwards towards what they hoped was their next test chamber. Though, if they did die, their deaths would be nothing more than temporary blips along Aperture's timeline, they were still extremely painful. The intercom crackled to life suddenly, making P-Body jump and squawk crossly.
'Death is too good for him, isn't it, Blue?'
Atlas nodded and chirruped exaggeratedly, though he had absolutely no idea what She was talking about. However, he knew better than to contradict him. P-Body got a slightly more cryptic question.
'Orange. What do you think - does he deserve to float around space for the rest of eternity?' P-Body did the same as Atlas, nodding intently and chirruping with a slightly annoying encouragement.
'Wrong.' said the Voice coolly. P-Body exploded slowly, his arm flying out and hitting his brother in the blue-tinted optical lens. Squawking crossly, Atlas left the elevator in a huff, finding himself in a strange room, an Aperture Science Emergency Incinerator tucked into the corner of it. As P-Body was re-spawned and joined his brother, Atlas eyed the Incinerator curiously. It opened, and both jumped back, wariness and curiosity warring inside their small minds.
"You will see an Aperture Science Emergency Incinerator." explained the Announcement System. "When you hear the buzzer, drop your Aperture Science Handheld Portal Devices into the Aperture Science Emergency Incinerator. You will no longer be requiring them."
The familiar, harsh buzzer sounded. Atlas and P-Body threw in the portal guns, cringing away from the un-relinquishing heat. The incinerator slammed shut and retreated into the panels. Puzzled, the androids surveyed the chamber. It was very odd. There were no buttons, elevators, doors, or much of anything but those familiar, grey-white panels.
'Today, you will be experimenting with the force of vacuums and portals. I'm going to try to replicate the conditions of space - more specifically, the moon's orbit. This will take several tests.
"The portal will open in 3… 2… 1."
Suddenly, Atlas and P-Body found themselves floating in midair. It probably would have been fun if they hadn't been spinning around the portal at a concentrated moon orbit speed. Atlas found himself smashed into a pulp by a wall which was adamantly refusing to move out of his way. P-Body's optic-to-mental-processing-unit found itself overloaded, which caused his head to explode.
A cackle from the omnipresent genetic life-form and disc operating system - or, as she had come to be known, GLaDOS - crackled through the intercom as the two androids stumbled out of their spawn pods, followed by a summary of the progress she had made.
'I've gained some valuable information here. First off - I need to make the vacuum stronger.' The androids groaned up at one of the cameras in protest. 'Second - make the test chamber bigger.' The evil cackle returned for an encore as the two sighed in relief. 'Number three - this is going to work.
'And I don't care if it takes one test or the rest of your puny existences.
'This. Will. Work.'
0-0
The Fact Sphere was the only being on Earth (or under it) who knew why he and the Adventure Sphere had not been sucked out into space with the Space Sphere and the Intelligence Dampening Sphere. And, as he considered his companion 'a coward and a blowhard', he wasn't likely to tell anyone any time soon.
Because the two had been essential in the defeat of Wheatley, and GLaDOS's return to power, they had been promoted to 'core monitors'. This basically meant that they sat in the same room as before, with all of the other corrupted cores, but they did have a new (albeit shoddy) Management Rail to navigate the room with. This was pretty useless, as the room was a perfect cube of 2 by 2, but it did succeed in making the two cores feel important. Of course, they were sharing one rail, which got very annoying.
Rick, officially known as the Adventure Sphere, skidded down to a female core near the end of the rail.
"Hey there, little lady. How's about yous and mes go and find ourselves a little adventure?" he asked, arranging his pixellated optic into a expression of a flirtatious manner.
The Fact Sphere trundled over and smashed into Rick, causing the Adventure Sphere to almost fall off of the end of the rail and knock his lady friend to the bottom of the pile, the side that the Management Rail didn't reach.
"Hey, buddy, wanna take an adventure right off of this rail?" snarled Rick.
"Fact - you are a blowhard and a coward. Also fact - you are a moron. Fact - that was notan accident."
"Yeah? Well thisthorn is about to kick your ass!" growled the (both literally and figuratively) green-eyed sphere.
"Fact - that statement made no sense." The pink lights in the Fact Sphere's optical receptors rolled around in a circle.
"Do you wantme to knock you into space with the other two?" screeched Rick, glowering at his partner-in-bickering.
"Fact - that rhetorical question will contain incorrect information verysoon."
"Yeah? Well… wait, what?"
For once, the Fact Sphere was silent. Rick shrugged - as much as one can shrugged when one is a metal ball - and swung uncertainly on the rail.
"Fact." The Fact Sphere started up again. "You are such a moron that you are going to cause both of us to fall off this rail."
"Oh, that is IT!" snarled Rick, smashing into the other core as fast and as hard as he possibly could.
0-0
Introductions are over! What do you think? Should I continue? Don't worry, it does get better. These are actually the first five chapters.
