"Brrrr~!" Maru said shaking her head, spraying water droplets in every direction. " Tobi is a wet boy!" Tobi giggled waving his arms. Maru took of her cloak and as if on cue Tobi left the room. "Good boy" She said. "Yay!" Tobi cheered from the hallway. Maru took off her shirt and shorts and was just about to take her bra off when she heard "THUD!" From behind her. She whirled around to see a boy lying on the ground. " Kyaaaaa!!!! Hentai!" She screeched. " Huh, what?" the boy muttered rising from his deep slumber. He sat up. "CRACK!" he hit his head on the dresser. " Ow! Fuck that hurt!" He said rubbing his head. He felt a murderous intent above him. He looked up and saw Maru covering her chest with red eyes. "Guwah!" he cried and grabbed something off the dresser and stumbled out of the room. Maru slammed the door and locked it shut. " What… the hell?" She thought out loud. She proceeded to put on a dry shirt and shorts. She then flung the door open, surprising Tobi in the process and then stormed down the hallway. She passed Tobi. "Did you see a boy run this way?" She asked. "No, Tobi went to the kitchen just now." Tobi replied. "Oh, Ok… Wait, what?!" Maru yelled and started running in the opposite direction. The Tobi had left. "Crap! He used henge!" Maru hissed. She ran down to Zetsu's room. "Where's Tobi!" She demanded. "Huh, oh he just ran this way a second ago" Zetsu's white half said. Maru slammed his door shut and turned a corner. She saw Tobi about 20 feet ahead of her. "Stop right there!" Maru yelled at him. "Like hell I will!" he hollered back. She forced some of her chakra into her feet to make her run faster. "I've got you!" She growled as she lunged for his cloak. "Uwah!" Tobi said crashing to the floor. "Etetet" Maru opened her eyes. She had caught him. "Change back now!" she commanded. " All right, all right, I give" Tobi sighed as a poof of white smoke engulfed him. The smoke cleared away and in Tobi's place was the boy. His hair was split down the middle and his left half was white and the right side was black but it covered his eye. In the back his hair was in long spikes that stook straight out. His visible eye was milky white and had no pupil. His skin was pasty white with make up and eyeliner and no blemishes or imperfections were to be seen. His lip had two rings through it. One that was connected to one of the five earrings that hung from his left ear. In his right ear looked to be a kunai. Around his neck was a black dog collar with small white spikes sticking out of it. His hoodie was neon green with a blue skull with an eye patch on it. His nails were black and Maru could tell it wasn't nail polish. He wore a pair of super tight black skinnies with a neon pink belt. His shoes though, were like nothing Maru had ever seen. They were platform shoes with bright orange heels, but the shoe itself had a zebra pattern. One shoe had black laces and the other had white laces. He was amazingly cute. Maru blushed and tried to restrain her self from squeezing the life out of him. "W-Who are you?!" She said regaining her composure. "Ugh, fine" He whined resting his head on his hand. " The name's Kori. Kori Sisiyama, I'm 16 years old, my favourite food is Nabe and my 3 sizes are-" Maru cut him off. "What were you doing in my room!?" Kori sighed again. "I'll tell you if you get off me." He said slyly. Maru hadn't noticed that she was sitting on his stomach in a very awkward position. She quickly scrambled off him. He sat upright and cracked his neck so that it was almost upside down. He did it with the other side too. Maru cringed; it was a little too extreme even for her. "Well it was raining, and I can't be out in the rain, I saw this house so I decided to see if anybody was home but the door was unlocked so I went in and got sleepy so I went to bed" he explained. "Why can't you be out in the rain?" Maru asked. Kori stood up and walked over to a window. He was almost 7 feet tall. With one hand he unlocked the window and then stuck it outside. Maru peered over the windowsill. "Szzzt" his hand started smoking. He brought his hand inside again. It was sizzling. "Rain water burns my skin," He said taking Maru's hand. She flinched. He continued to place her hand against his. " Ow! Hot!" She muttered as she quickly withdrew her hand. Maru pondered this for a minute then decided. "Right, I'm going to take you to meet Pein-sama" She said dragging I'm by the ear. "Owowow" he winced. Maru burst through the door with out knocking. Pein was at his computer as usual. He quickly shut the screen off. " How many times have I told you to knock before entering!" He shouted at her. Maru giggled, and then said " I lost count after 67." Kori and Pein both sweat dropped. She plopped Kori on the ground in front of her. "Oh god, not another one." Pein muttered. "I found this guy in my room." Maru announced. "And…?" Pein said looking at his nails, apparently uninterested. "He cant go out in the rain so he's gonna be staying here until the rain stops." Sure whatever… Wait, how'd he get in?" Pein realized. " Door was unlocked" Kori shrugged. "GROUP MEETING!" Pein boomed. Within 5 minuets all of the Akatsuki members assembled. " Someone forgot to lock the door when we went out today." Pein said eyeing all the members. He glared at Tobi who pointed at Zetsu who pointed at Kisame who pointed at Itachi who pointed at Sasori Who pointed at Deidra who pointed at Hidan who pointed at Kazuku who pointed at Maru who pointed at Konan who pointed at Pein. "Oh…" Said Pein. "It was me" He pointed at himself. Everybody fell over. "Fine, you can stay until the rain stops" Concluded Pein and dismissed everyone with a wave of his hand. Everybody left the room and resumed whatever they were doing. A door opened and out stepped Karla in Teddy bear Pyjama's rubbing her eyes and yawning. " Did I miss something?" She said drowsily. Kori noticed her first and gasped. "Omigawd! You're so cute! No… You're more than cute, you're Kawaii!" He squealed and grasped her in a bear hug. Karla looked up at him and had a nosebleed. "Bi-Bishojo" She muttered, her eye's spinning. He let her go and then said "Hmm… something's missing." He placed his hands against her chest. "You're lacking aren't you" He mumbled. "What the hell do you think you're doing?!!?!" Maru yelled angrily kicking him in the groin as hard as she could. "Ahhhhhh…" Kori whispered, his face turning blue as he sank to the floor. He curled up in a ball and something jingled. Nanako heard the jingle from her place in the corner and went over to see what it was. She sniffed Kori to get used to his smell. Kori noticed her and came back to life. He put his finger out as she sniffed. It was a perfect Kodak moment. "Nom" Nanoko bit it. "…AHHHH!!!" Kori's face turned even paler than it already was. "GET IT OFF MEE!!!" Kori shouted shaking the cat around. "Nyaaa~a" The cat flew off his finger. "Owiie" Kori said blowing on his finger. Tears filled his eyes as his finger started to swell up. Maru couldn't take it " You're just too cute!" She squealed grasping him into her chest. " Can… Slightly… Breath…" Kori managed to get out. Maru grabbed Karla and dragged her into the abyss. "GROUP HUG!" Tobi yelled bursting through a wall. "Oi! How much do you think those things cost!?" Shouted the pissed off Kazuku. "Oomph!" Maru groaned as Tobi glomped her, making her release the iron hold being put on Kori and Karla. They both flopped down on the floor trying to get their breaths back. "Ah!" Said Tobi pointing to Kori's pants. "It's a huge candy cane!". "Don!" Kori pounded Tobi on the head with his fist. He pushed the bulge in his pants down with his hand until he heard a "CRACK!". "Did Tobi hear a crack?" Tobi piped up. Maru pointed at Kori. Tobi grabbed Kori's arms from behind and with one foot held Kori's feet. "N-No , don't!" Kori pleaded. Tobi took his foot and pressed as hard as he could on Kori's back. "AAAAAAAAAH!!!!! STOP!!!!" Kori screamed. "CRAYACK!". Kori fell to the ground with a thud. Maru and Karla cringed. "Tobi is a good chiropractor!" Tobi beamed. Kori slowly got up on his knees and suddenly stood up and announced, " My back feels better!" With his hands on his hips. Maru and Karla sweat dropped. "Who's fixing the wall this time?" said the still relatively pissed off Kazuku. Kori noticed the wall and said "Oh, leave that to me." He pounded his fists backwards twice and with his index fingers made a square around the wall. The pieces of the wall that were lying on the floor, somehow got up and went to there original places in the wall. " Yay! Now Tobi can run through all the walls he wants!" Tobi cheered running through the wall again. Kori sweat dropped and then said "Dobe…". "SASUKE!!!" Itachi roared coming out of nowhere forming the hand sign for fire. Everything went in slow motion as a fireball whizzed by Kori who just dodged it by millimetres. In that split second he had managed to brush away the hair over his right eye to reveal a completely black eye. No pupil, no eyeball, just an empty black space. Itachi didn't even have to look at his eye. He was in a graveyard. Tombstones flowered the lot. On each one was written "Uchiha". Dozens of hands burst through the soil that held them captive. They grabbed at his ankles dragging him down to meet his doom. "He'll wake up in a few hours." Kori said as Itachi dropped to his knees and then to the floor. He brushed the hair back over his eye to hide it again. Maru was curious. "Hey, let me see your eye again." Maru asked. "Fine, but not for too long." Kori sighed. He flipped his head this time and revealed his eye. Maru examined it and kept switching to different angles. Kori was getting annoyed and finally said, "Just touch it." Maru couldn't resist. She took her pinkie and stuck it in the socket. Slowly a gooey like substance creeped out of his eye. Maru stared at it as it oozed down his cheek. It started coming out more rapidly and thicker. Little by little it started going upwards into the air like crystals and would harden. Maru gazed at it longingly. "WOOOOOSH!" It gushed out of his eye like a canon. Maru was all sticky and so was everything else. "BWAHAHAHA~!" Kori bawled holding his stomach. Hidan poked his head around the corner and smiled "Nothing like fan service" then popped back just in time to miss a glob of goo being thrown at his head by Maru. " I swear I'm gonna kill him" muttered the voice in Maru's head. "Hmm? Did you say something?" Kori asked trying not to laugh. "Wait… You heard that?" Maru said quite shocked. "Oh! So you're a splitto to!" Kori shouted. "A what?" Maru asked a little confuzzled. " Like a split personality" Kori explained pointing at himself. "I'm one too." "Erm…" Karla stuttered nervously. Kori squatted down to her level. "Hmm? What is it?" He asked smiling. "Could you please hide your eye again? It's creeping me out." Karla said turning her head away. Kori was on his hands and knees with his back to them and a spotlight on him. "Sh-she thinks im creepy" Kori sobbed. "Ah! No! I didn't say you were creepy! I meant your eye was" Said Karla waving her hands vigorously. Kori was huddled in Nanoko's corner poking at the cat with purple lines above his head and little spirit clouds. "Nya… Nya…" He kept on repeating as the cat looked at him curiously. "Ah… I want to go to a hot spring" Maru said shaking off some goop on her shirt. Kazuku popped his head around the corner and said "We have an indoor one here" Maru sweat dropped. "Where does everyone keep coming from?" Hidan popped his head around the corner and shouted, "THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!" Only to receive a face full of goo. "Ah! I forgot about that!" Karla exclaimed pounding her fist into the palm of her hand. "Come on, it's this way" Karla said dragging Maru by the hand giggling. "Kukukukuku" Kori cackled from his corner as an evil gleam appeared in his eye.

15 minuets later

"Ah! This feels great!" Maru said stretching her arms. " Mmmbh glurp brume" Karla agreed blowing bubbles. The door slid open and in stepped a girl with half black and half white hair in pigtails. Her boobs were twice the size of Maru's. Maru looked down at hers and squeezed them. "Hello" The girl greeted as she eased her way down into the water. She started bleeding from the nose and for some reason; there was a crown in there that crowed "Ahoo! Ahoo!" There was an awkward silence. "Um… Kori?" Maru said. "Shit…" girl Kori muttered. "This is mixed bathing" Maru said pointing at the sign. "POOF!" Kori stopped using henge and went back to normal. "It was worth a try" he grunted as he started blowing bubbles. "Wait… cant you not be in water?" Maru asked. "Rain water" Kori corrected her. Karla floated by , her face red and her eyes spinning. "AHHHHHH!!!! KARLA'S DEAD!!!" Maru shrieked jumping out of the bath. Kori had a massive nosebleed and held his nose. "Oh no, I couldn't possibly eat anymore" Karla mumbled. "Ah…! She's alive!" Kori said blankly. "Ahoo!" The crow cawed again. "Teeheehee" Kori giggled as an evil thought stewed in his mind. He went reeeeally close up to Karla and behind her ear, blew. "Nyaaa~a" Karla squealed. Kori grinned evilly and motioned for Maru who was cowering behind a rock. She came over and joined him. As he had another nosebleed, he mimed for Maru to blow in Karla's ear. "Do it!" The voice inside Maru's head yelled. Maru bent down and blew on Karla's ear. "Nyaaaa~nchu!" Karla squealed again. Maru smirked at Kori, Kori smirked back. Simantaiously they blew on both ears. Karla's eye's popped open as she shouted "ITS FUCKING HOT IN HERE!!!" and ran out of the bath butt naked. Maru and Kori both had nosebleeds. Kori turned to Maru "That wasn't cute at all." He said waving his hand as if he were waving away some bad smell. Kori stood up and Maru jumped back. "So that's what kept on jingling!" Maru exclaimed. Kori grinned. "I have 17" he said tying a small towel around his waist. Maru counted. He had five in his left ear, the kunai-like one in his right ear. 2 lip rings. 1 eyebrow ring in his left. His nipples pierced. A nose ring. A belly button ring surrounded by a tattoo with four likes going horizontal and four straight lines going sideways. It looked like a sealing symbol. Then he had the prince harry. "Where are the other three?" Maru asked. Kori bent down to her level. He slowly stuck out his tongue. At the tip of it was a tongue stud. In the middle was a spacer about the size of a yen coin. But at the very back was a bright red spike that was about 2 inches long and a centimetre thick. Kori retracted his foot long tongue and said proudly "There, 17" and with that, walked away. "Seishuku!" The crow cawed. Maru was getting a little hot herself, so she decided to get out too. Maru kept on thinking about that red spike. Didn't it hurt him? She slipped on a fresh tank top and a pair of short shorts. The house was quiet, which was unusual. "Hello?" She called. No one answered. She checked all the upstairs rooms. Nobody. She checked the basement. Nobody. She went into the living room and found everyone except Itachi, who was still passed out. Konan and Kori were going head to head on DDR. Kori had his hands behind his head, smoking a cigarette and easily keeping up on the extreme mode. Konan was breathing heavily and trying to keep up with his pace. "DAN!" the last note passed. The tally score came up on the screen. Everyone watched intently as the score rose and rose and rose. Kori's went into an E. Konan's and AAA for Konan. "Yes!" Pein cheered. The scores went back one. AAA for Kori and AA for Konan. "No…" Pein muttered. "Haha!" Kori grinned and made the peace sign. "Tch, fine, you're in" Pein groaned tossing him a cloak. Kori caught it with the back of his hand and then twirled it around, making it land on his shoulder. "You'll be Zetsu's Kouhai." Pein said jerking his head at the cannibalistic flytrap. Kori looked over at him. His eyes widened. "Ah! You're a splitto to!" He exclaimed jabbing a finger at Zetsu. Zetsu nodded. Something hit Kori in the back of the head. "Ow! He said rubbing his head. "You'll need that," Pein said pointing to a ring lying on the floor. It was gold with Hayasa written in Kanji. "Eh?!! How come he gets a ring and I don't?!" Maru whined. "Because he's more smexy than you" Pein shrugged. "Im not smexy…?" Maru slumped to the floor in a ball and started saying "Meatball" Over and over again. Kori pulled the cloak over his head. It hung off him and was too short. "Do you have something larger and tighter?" he asked pulling on the thigh of the cloak. "First we need a bigger cloak, now we need a smaller cloak." Pein moaned. Maru rolled by saying "Banana, banana, banana,". "Candy cane!" Tobi giggled to himself. "Cheer up." Kori said sympathetically. Chibi Maru sat up and looked at him with tears in her huge eyes. Kori sweat dropped and looked away, scratching his cheek and muttered "Don't look at me like that." There was an awkward silence as the crow flew by cawing "Seishuku!". "…Anyway, lets celebrate!" Kori suggested. Everyone cheered up even Maru who had come out of her funk at the word celebrate. "Who's got the beer!?" Hidan shouted. Kori reached into his backpack. "Ah!" Maru realized "So that's what you took off the table!" Kori nodded and took out a 50 pack of beer.

20 minuets later

"And sho" Kori slurred taking another sip of sake, "Dat's why I unly has 1 eye". They all nodded. "Allriyut, mii tuyurn" Said Zetsu starting to tip over. "My muver was a-" Kori belched a huge burp. "And my Dayud was -" Kori belched again. "Ah~n, I'm sho drunk!" Itachi, who had regained consuicness, sighed falling onto the table. Konan pressed her chest against Kori's back. Kori grinned and without turning around said "I'll sayuve yuuu fer latur." Konan giggled and pressed her breasts harder into his back. Suddenly Kori slammed his hand on the table. It startled all the drunken Akatsuki members. "Yosha! Let's pley strip go fursh!" Kori yelled standing up, or at least trying to without falling over. "I've got the condoms!" Karla blurted out. Everyone sweat dropped. Deidra was the dealer because he wasn't drunk, his hands however were red. Deidra handed out a series of 7 cards to everyone except himself since he wasn't playing. Half an hour later, the akatsuki's were all stripped down to their undergarments. Karla, who had lost miserably and had nothing on, was covering her chest with her arms. "BWAHAHA!" Kori guffawed. "Itty bittie tittie committee!" He fell over and then picked himself up. "Red ace of spades" Hidan said to Kori. "Oh fiyun." Kori said throwing the card across the table. "Take da dog colla orf!" Hidan commanded. "Ah~n Mendokusai..." Kori whined as he started to undo the strap. The room got cold as he plunked it on the table in front of him. "Jack of hearts" Kori said to Kazuku as his hair started to rise into two points like ears. "Go fursh" Kazuku said smugly. "Haha! Fursh…" Kisame laughed. Kori speared the card deck with his fingernail that was turning into a claw. "Umm… Maru said pointing at Kori's fingernail. Kori noticed it and grinned to show razor sharp fangs as he shook the card off his hand. "I think you are leaking" Maru said pointing at his hand. "Ewwwwww, you're grosh," Kori laughed as a liquidy substance engulfed his arm. It was like black and white bubbles that were sort of hanging onto him. Something like a tail appeared from behind his back and tapped him on the shoulder. "Ah!" He said, "I am leaking!" He grabbed the dog collar and put it around his neck. The substance returned back inside of him. He took the kunai earring out and placed that on the table instead. "What's that thing for?" asked Sasori nodding at the weapon-like accessory. "Hmmmmm…" Kori thought with his hand cupping his chin. "Ah!" He exclaimed snapping his fingers. "I remembur wut movie I shaw yu in!". "W-what?" Sasori stuttered looking nervously around. "!" Kori shouted. "PPFFFFTTTT!!!!" Maru spat out the sake she was drinking. "BWAHAHAHA!!" She howled holding her stomach rolling around on the floor. There was an awkward silence. A light bulb appeared over Sasori's head as his face turned into a perverted grin. "Kukuku" He giggled. Nobody else got the joke. "I gotta have more cowbell!" Pein blurted out in his drunkenness… "I'll show yu wut mi earin' duz" Kori said picking it up with his two fingers. He placed it in his hands like he was making the seal of the tiger and shouted "SEN NEN NO SHI!!!!". He disappeared with a puff of smoke and popped up behind the drunken Pein and rammed it up his arse. Peins eye's bulged as he flew across the room and crashed through a wall. "Wee go thru tooo meny wallz in dis house" Kazuku hummed. "Haha, his arse is going to look like a candy cane" Zetsu chuckled. "CANDY CANE!" Tobi yelled. "Nngh" Maru grabbed her head. "Oi, yu ok?" Kori asked looking at the hole in the wall. "Yea, just a little writers block, look im gonna go to bed early aight?". "Kays" Kori sing-songed. "Nighty-night"

Next morning.

"Mmbleh" Maru mumbled turning over in her bed. She opened her eye to see Kori grinning at her. " I can't go out in sunlight" He said his teeth reaching for her neck.