Warning: Mentions of m/m smut

A/N: This is based on an adventure I had last night, though sadly my injury wasn't due to anything nearly as fun.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.


"So how did this happen exactly?" Owen asked probing the wound again. "I think you're going to need stitches."

"I hit my head on a doorknob." Ianto told him again, hissing in pain.

"Yes, but what were you doing when you hit your head?"

"Falling." Ianto said sarcastically.

"What made you fall? Were you drinking? Did you forget to eat today? Did you take any drugs?" Owen questioned.

"I haven't had any alcohol today, I did remember to eat, and I haven't taken any drugs." Ianto said sharply.

"Well what were you doing before you fell?"

"I was standing up."

"Okay, I get you were standing up and that you fell, but what were you doing while you were standing?" Owen asked, slightly annoyed. "Were you just standing doing nothing and you blacked out? Were you working on something? Exercising? What exactly were you doing before you fell?"

"You mean right before I fell?" Ianto asked.

"Yes. What made you fall?"

"I was experiencing one of the most amazing orgasms of my life." Ianto said. "Jack was kneeling in front of me, sucking my cock in the most amazing way while one hand stroked my balls and the other thrust fingers into my arse in the most delicious way."

Owen stared open-mouthed at Ianto and how honest and descriptive the young man was being.

"As I orgasmed into Jack's luscious mouth I got a little dizzy and lost my footing, which made me fall backwards. The doorknob just happened to be in the perfect position to hit my head and create the cut you now see."

Ianto closed his eyes as a wave of dizziness hit him and Jack was by his side instantly, an arm around his shoulders to support him. Ianto leaned into Jack's comforting touch, nuzzling against the captains chest as much as the pain in his head would allow.

"You okay?" Jack murmured, stroking Ianto's stomach with his free hand.

"Yeah. Just dizzy and my head is throbbing." Ianto mumbled.

"Well Tea-boy, if you could lie down on your stomach I'll get that cut taken care of and then you can go to bed." Owen said, getting his suturing kit ready. "And by go to bed I mean sleep. No strenuous activity."

"I'll take care of him." Jack promised, helping Ianto move into position.

"Okay Ianto, I'm going to freeze the wound." Owen said, as he gently cleaned the cut. "You'll feel a little prick and then a burning sensation as I inject the liquid. Then it will be nice and numb and I will stitch it up. Okay?"

Ianto made a little grunting noise and he reached a hand out for Jack. Jack grabbed his hand and held on as Owen started to inject the freezing. Ianto whimpered and gripped Jack's hand tightly and Jack automatically started rubbing Ianto's back soothingly.

Owen worked quickly and Ianto was soon all stitched up and good as new.

"Now if you don't mind, I have a bed at home I would like to be in." Owen said grabbing his coat from the chair he had thrown it on.

"Thanks Owen!" Jack called as Owen left.

Jack helped Ianto sit up and supported him when he went to stand.

"How are you feeling?"

"Tired." Ianto mumbled, letting Jack lead him to his bunker.

They curled up together on Jack's bed and were just drifting off to sleep when Ianto sat up suddenly.

"Please tell me I didn't describe part of our sex life to Owen." Ianto moaned.

"We'll blame it on the doorknob hitting you in the head. Head wounds often cause odd quirks. Don't worry about it just go to sleep." Jack soothed, pulling Ianto back down.

"Jack, can you promise me one thing?" Ianto murmured almost asleep.

"What?"

"No more doorknobs during sex. They aren't any fun. They just hurt."

"That is one promise I will happily make."