Title the dark night
I walked sexily down the hallway, my iron ass swaying ever so slightly in my diesel jeans. My glorious eyes happened upon a group of beautiful students, One in particular was glorious and majestic. His sparkly, poop-coloured eyes delved directly into my soul. My large, black, excellent muscles vibrated with glee. He smiled sensually at me, and I couldn't help but get the impression that he was a vampire. Suddenly and all of a sudden a bitchy, brunette, crippled, smelly girl appeared. I robustly punched her in her illiterate face and she fell generously to the floor. She cried and ran all the way back to her hometown, Oh yeah, by the way, she said her name was Bella and that Edward was hers! Edward smiled at me and winked stimulatingly. I knew his name because he was really popular.
My name is Krakin Aaass, I'm from Russia, Germany and Africa. My gently absurd buttocks attracts females but I like men. I am beastly and scrumptious. My skin is black and haunted. Also my ass is so toned it could crack nuts.
The bell rang and Edward pranced jauntily towards me. His bewhiskered face glowed and I had to look away because it hurt my illusive eyes. My heart bounced off my ribs and jumped into my throat. I vomited a little with excitement.
"Oh my, what a dapper jumper you've got on today." Edward said lustrously. I instantly pictured him wearing nothing but my sweater. He was hairy and charming and had clever ears. His man-place was all sparkly.
Oh dear! Keep your mind out of the gutter, you supremely beautiful prince of darkness." Edward said playfully. I blushed because he just totally read my mind. Now I was sure he was a vampire. It all added up.
Later on in my daunting chemistry class, I was sitting all alone. Several hot girls with large boobs ooed and awed over my princely handsome face. I scoffed at them. I like men, you fools.
At that very moment of that very second, Edward's memorable face returned to my line of vision. My mind went blank as he harshly walked over to where I was sitting. He was wearing an ensemble of a forest green Burberry v-neck cardigan, a black leather, fleece shirt by Le Chateau and turquoise, black leather and wool jeans by G-star raw. They dangled on his feminine body I felt overwhelmed by his praise-worthy, sublime body. I batted my extended eyelashes as he took his seat forcefully.
He whipped a note at me playfully. It smelled like innocence and masculinity. I inhaled it deeply and my lungs were on fire with passion. I opened the note and it read:
"Oh, gracious prince. Your hand is mine. It's so large and veiny. I dream of grasping it with my hand seductively. I tremple at the sight of your hands. Meet me in the forest at noon tomorrow, when the sun is highest in the skies. I await you."
Love Edward
Under the brilliant note there was a breathtaking talented artist rendition of our hands together. I looked up at Edward, but he was gone!
I couldn't wait for tomorrow
