A/N: Hiya! This is my first fic, so, um, dont kill me. And guess what, i'm probably the ONLY fan fic writer who doesn't have romance! I know that the English isn't perfect, some of the people are out of character, and the plot is erm...weird, but please just r/r. no flames please, i sunburn easily! ^-^
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Just on time, Harry, Ron, and Hermione rushed into History of Magic class and collapsed at their desks. They had run the entire way to class after being held up by Professor McGonagall.

".....and Harry, I expected better from you! Your parents would be terribly embaressed...."

Harry laughed internally. It had been worth the scolding: While Harry and Draco were slinging taunts, Hermione had crept up behind him and muttered a charm that immediately changed his hair color from silver blonde to puke green.

"Yes, Proffesor. We won't do it again!" they chorused.

So now they were nearly late. Professor Binns held up his ghostly hand for quiet only a moment after they had arrived. The class was hesitant to be silent. They knew Professor Binns never EVER shut up.

"In the year 1692 the Muggles began to find out about us. THey commenced with hanging in the town of Sohlem-"

"Proffessor Binns?" a sharp voice cut in, "Don't you mean Salem?"

"Right, right, Sohlem, that's what I said...at any rate, one day they accused me of witchcraft. I did not confess, but they were sure to hang me anyway.."

Hermione did some quick addition. "For this story to be true," she whispered, "he'd have to be over three hundred years old!"

"Tsk, tsk Hermione. You're forgetting that only last week he told us he dueled Merlin and, of course, won!" Ron joked.

"Ron, Hermione, I can't believe you've forgotten that Professor Binns was present at the founding of Hogwarts! Why, he told us only two days ago!" Harry sized up Proffessor Binns. "For a thousand year old wizard, he certainly has aged well, the old bugger!"

"...and the man came up to me, ready to run me through with a pitchfork. Suddenly, I realized that a wand was sticking out of his pocket! He could see in my eyes that I knew his secret--" Professor Binns droned on.

"PITCHFORK! THE PITCHFORK! For the love of marmalade, the PITCHFORK!" rooted Ron.

"...And then, he threw down his pitchfork ("Dammit!") and hugged me."

"Oh, malarky, this is made up!" murmured Harry.

"...and the other Muggles saw it, and condemned him as a witch too!"

"Please......hang him....please...." whispered Ron.

"And then they hung him as well. Of course we used the Iron Neck curse, which you won't be learning until 6th year. But the silly Muggles were fooled, and they went on their merry way."

"Ron...when we get back to the common room, PARTY! they hung the old fart!" Harry struggled to contain his mirth.

"Harry, Ron, have a chocolate frog! I brought them just for boredom in class like this.." Hermione offered.

Ron was struck dumb. "Did...Hermione..just say...boring???!??!"

Harry, equally amused, took the chocolate frog and nodded.

"Ow!" the end of class had finally come, and Parvati Patil had kicked Ron in the back.

"You were being reallly rude! Professor Binns deserves better!"

"Erm...sorry, Parvati."

Hermione giggled as they left the classroom. "You should have seen your face! 'sorry, parvati'...oh, it was great!!"

"She should be arrested! Child abuse!"

"Yeah, she should Ron. Yes, she should." said Harry, smiling to Hermione over his shoulder.

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A/N: Okay, that was realllly strange. I'm sure I've just turned everyone off my writing, but, try again next time, eh?