"All the time you need."

"Actually it'll only take a minute."

Sherlock nods and takes out his mobile, glancing up when he realizes the two men are staring at him.

"I need you to leave," the taller man, Ned, says hands deep in his pockets and looking rather embarrassed.

"What for?"

"I don't like to have people in the room, it messes with my train of my thought."

Emerson rolls his eyes, wondering how long it'll take Ned to come up with a better excuse than that, but is surprised when the consulting detective tucks his phone away, a curiously understanding smile on his face when he replies with an "of course" and steps outside.

Sixty-five seconds later they emerge from the room with not only the name of the killer but where he could be found and the revisions to his will which he'd saved in code as a memo on his phone.

"You got all that in a minute from a naked corpse?"

Ned rubs the back of his neck, pointedly ignoring Emerson, "The dead have a way of, uh, speaking if you know how to pay attention."

"Oh," John looks at his phone, "Exclamation points, better get back."

Chuck is already standing though, having just put away her own phone. There's a grin on her face that's positively gleeful as they leave the cafeteria and John listens in amazement as she goes on about how she glad she is that interesting murders are universal. She reminds him of Sherlock actually, except in bright colors and only slightly more giggling.

"And then it turned out to be the monkey trainer not the monkey itself, but still any reason to gate crash a circus right?"

"Oh, absolutely," he agrees fervently.

"I bet your boyfriend loves cases like those."

John laughs, "No, no."

"Really? When Ned was explaining the Taffeta case he seemed to-"

"No, I meant the boyfriend part. Very close friend that happens to be male and whom I share a life with, but definitely not my boyfriend."

"Oh," once again he's reminded of Sherlock as she flashes a grin that seems to convey that there's a joke only the two of them are in on as she lowers her voice, "I have a very close friend that also happens to be male and whom I share a life with too."

"Haha, yeah, I don't really think we're talking about the same kind of relationship."

"You guys run around solving mysteries together."

"Yes, if you want to be obvious."

"He's awkward around everyone else, but when you're alone together he does little things that make you wonder if he's the iceman he wishes he was but obviously isn't."

"I wouldn't say 'iceman'."

"Affectionate in small ways, but anything physical is totally out of the question."

"Which he thinks I need just because I happen to have a reputation. It's not all about that."

"It's knowing how happy you could make him, but there's always one thing-"

"-after the bloody other and god forbid he take my advice."

"Never mind how many times I've saved him when he's too stubborn to ask for help-"

"No he's Sherlock Holmes-"

"Ned the piemaker, a special little snowflake-"

"-with his one of a kind gift-"

"-and it's not like I don't appreciate it when he tries to protect me, I do, but-"

"I fought in a war, I don't need to be coddled."

"I took sharp shooting lessons for thirteen years, but no 'take the next cab and go home, Chuck, I have to think'."

John snorts, "Which means go off on his own and end up getting himself into some sort of bind."

"And after all that, what do I get to wake up to?"

"Molded fruit in the fridge."

"A dead body on the floor."

"God forbid he take it back when he's done with it."

"I know!"

They stop, looking at each other with newfound camaraderie as well as realizing they've made it out to the parking lot where their counterparts are waiting for them. The two taller men smile at their approach.

"Glad you could join us at last John."

"Chuck, there you are."

"Sod off," the chorus, brushing past the confused pair arm in arm and agreeing that a drink sounds amazing.

Sherlock frowns, "Fancy a pint, Ned?"

"Suddenly yes, thank you."