Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.

Note: I'll get the next chapter of The Pact up tomorrow, I promise! For now, just a fun little story to tide you over. Please review this if you like it! Also, italics for the most part are Rory's thoughts; anything in quotes that's not a conversation is the boys' thoughts. Okay? Okay.

Warning: M just…just for safety, okay?

Rory Flanagan had a secret that no one else knew:

He could read minds.

Not all minds. And not just any old mind. No, he could only read the minds of teenage boys. Never teenage girls, oh no. God wouldn't be so nice as to allow that power. Nope, it was only the minds of teenage boys that Rory could easily read.

And horny teenage boys, at that…

Kurt

"Oh my God, Blaine's pants are so tight. I can't wait for this weekend, when his parents are out of town. I can't wait to fuck him hard on Friday night."

Rory gulped; was he supposed to be listening to Kurt's innermost thoughts like this? I mean, it was one thing to listen to a boy fantasize about a girl, but it was another thing altogether to listen to a boy fantasize about another boy. But hard as he tried to tune out of Kurt's mind, he couldn't tear himself away.

"Oh, sweet Jesus, I love Blaine. His cock is so good to me. Not that I'm always on the bottom, of course. Oh, no. I've fucked his brains out, and he's fucked my brains out. But I think I like being on top better."

Rory turned bright red. Of all minds to read right at that very moment, it had to be Kurt Hummel. It just had to be Kurt when Kurt was going on about…gay sex.

"But oh, God, that Irish kid is so hot, too."

Rory nearly fell off his chair. His head snapped in Kurt's direction. What?

"He's such a nice little virgin," Kurt smirked. "I'd love to be the one to fuck him first. Of course, I still love Blaine, but I have to admit, I'm a sucker for baby-blue eyes."

Rory looked around the room frantically, praying no one would see that he was getting a little hard at listening to Kurt's train of thoughts.

"He'd never get into my bed, though," Kurt thought sadly. "Ah, well. Maybe someday…or I could convince him to have a threesome with me and Blaine. I don't mind sharing my sweetie, especially with that hot piece of Irish ass."

"OH MY GOD," Rory said aloud, and everyone turned to stare at him.

"Something wrong, Rory?" Mr. Schue asked.

"N…n…no," he stammered. "I thought I saw a spider, that's all." He sucked in a breath, praying for his mild erection to go down. Could it get any more humiliating?

Blaine

"I love Irish accents," Blaine thought dreamily. "They're so…sexy."

Here we go again…Rory sighed heavily. First Kurt, now Blaine? What, was he only tuned into gay boys' thoughts that week? He titled his neck to the side and listened.

"I'll admit, Rory is pretty cute," Blaine smiled at the boy, "but not as cute as Kurt, of course. Kurt is mine, and he'll always be mine. Oh, but what I wouldn't give to have an Irishman on my arm!"

Okay, this isn't so bad. Rory relaxed in his seat. He closed his eyes and let things happen.

"But if I didn't have Kurt," Blaine adjusted his bowtie, "I'd totally go after Rory. There's no way that boy is totally straight. Blaine Anderson's gaydar never lies. Besides, I totally saw him checking out Sam's ass the other day in the hall."

Rory's felt a deep blush creep up the back of his neck and crawl across his face. So he did check out Sam's ass in the hall. So what? He didn't know Blaine had seen!

"I wonder if he'd be down for a threesome," Blaine wondered.

"JESUS CHRIST," Rory blurted out. The class turned to look at him. "Um…it's…we're learning about religion," he explained lamely. What is UP with these American boys?

Puck

"You know what makes you a true stud?" Puck flexed his biceps.

I'm sure you'll tell us all, Rory rolled his eyes. But go ahead.

"When the dudes want you, too," Puck went on. "And let me tell you, that Rory kid? Yeah, he so wants me."

Rory nearly choked on the water he was sipping at the time. THE HECK?

"And who wouldn't want the Puckster?" Puck nodded. "I mean, look at me. I'm a total stud. Cougars want me, girls want me, and now the dudes want me. I so banged Matt Rutherford and Mike back in sophomore year. And I'll admit, it was damn awesome."

Rory didn't know who the hell Matt was, but he found himself getting a little turned on by this revelation of Puck's. Despite the voice in the back of his head telling him to leave the room, he simply cocked his head in Puck's direction.

"I'd totally fuck that sweet Irish ass," Puck sighed. "He'd be so nice. And you know how the Puckster loves virgins. And Rory? So a virgin. Wish he'd let me fuck him, or at least make out with him. Or maybe he'd let me suck him off. I'm sure he'd love that. I bet I could make him scream and moan and cum hard, the little virgin slut."

"HOLY CRAP," Rory nearly jumped out of his skin. Puck looked at him curiously.

"You okay, dude?" He asked.

"I just remembered I have a five-page paper due tomorrow," Rory stood up quickly, skirting out of the locker room so Puck couldn't see the tent he was pitching.

"Like I said," Puck smirked and nodded. "Even the dudes want me."

Artie

"Rory's so cute," Artie sighed.

Does everyone in this damn Glee club want me? Rory's eyes widened.

"So what if I'm bisexual," Artie leaned his elbow on the arm of his wheelchair. "No one knows it. Well, except Kurt, that is, because we had that thing back in junior high."

Now, Rory was curious. He shot casual glances over at Artie as he nibbled his lunch. Kurt and Artie? He never would've guessed, but it sounded pretty nice.

"And Rory? Yeah, he's real cute," Artie was thinking. "And I've only been with one person; Brittany. I've never actually been with a guy. But if I could pick one guy out of this whole school to sleep with, it would so be Rory."

Rory nearly dropped his apple. WHY DOES EVERYONE WANT TO SLEEP WITH ME?

"Look at the sexy way he bites that apple," Artie's eyes clouded over with lust. "If only I could see him eat a banana. Then I'd know for sure how good he'd be at eating my banana, if you know what I mean."

"BLOODY HELL," Rory dropped his apple on the floor.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Rachel asked. "You've been acting strange lately."

"I just realized that Regionals is in two weeks," he fake-explained.

"That's right," her eyes widened. "Thanks for reminding me!"

"You're welcome," he said weakly, as he avoided Artie's lustful stare. Shit!

Finn

"It's kind of cool, Rory having a man-crush on me," Finn swelled with pride. "At least it's not like that creepy stalker-ish crush Kurt had on me in sophomore year."

Whoa, blackmail! Jackpot! Rory wiggled excitedly.

"He actually kind of looks like Kurt," Finn shuddered. "What if he's Kurt's son from like, the future or something? What if he's like, my nephew? Well then, that dream I had the other night about him is really scary in that case…"

Rory subconsciously leaned in curiously. What dream?

"That certainly was a nice dream," Finn remembered fondly. "Yeah, sure, when I slept with Santana, she was on top. And when I slept with Rachel, I was on top. But I think I kind of like being on top. And Rory squirming under me, begging me to fuck him? Yeah, that was pretty hot. No wonder I woke up with the sheets wet."

"FINN SLEPT WITH SANTANA?" Rory clapped his hand over his mouth in horror.

"Where did you hear that?" Finn narrowed his eyes.

"Um. N…no…from…BRITTANY!" Rory fled from the room terror. Keep your mouth shut next time, Flanagan!

"What's up with him lately?" Rachel wondered aloud.

Sam

"Alright, I'll admit it, I'm gay," Sam came right out and…well, thought it.

SCORE! Rory bounced in his chair a bit. I HAVE A CHANCE!

"And yeah, Puck and I have fooled around a bit in the locker room or whatever. But I'm still a virgin. I'm saving it for someone special. Someone like…Rory."

Rory nearly fell off his chair, not believing his luck. SAM LIKES ME!

"He'd be nice and tight," Sam smiled. "And if he's anything like Puck, he'll moan like hell at my blowjobs. Sometimes, there are advantages to having a big mouth."

Oh, sweet Jesus, Rory closed his eyes, instantly becoming hard. Go on…

"I'd love to kiss him, all over," Sam grinned even wider. "Hot, burning kisses, all over his pale body. He'd moan and pant like crazy when I finally got around to fucking his sweet ass, which I'd do slowly, to drive him mad with lust and want. I'd make him scream my name when he finally hit his climax. Then, and only then, I'd finally shoot my cum into his tightness."

Jesus Christ, Rory's eyes were widened to their fullest, his cock very hard right now. His reading of Sam's thoughts were suddenly interrupted by Kurt's.

"Oh, look," Kurt smirked. "Sweet little innocent Rory is pitching a nice tent right now. Bet he's nice and big. Not as big as me or Puck, but big enough."

Oh God, Rory began to sweat. He was aware of everyone's thoughts at that moment.

"Hahaha, Rory's so turned on right now," Puck grinned widely. "Oh man, this is great. So damn hot, baby. Do I turn you on? Yeah, you know I do."

Fuck, I gotta get out of here! Rory looked, panic-stricken, for the nearest exit."

"Going to jerk off?" Blaine leaned against Kurt. "Can I help you? I'd love to just pump your shaft and make you cum into my hand."

Got to leave, got to leave, got to leave, Rory was very, very red.

"Going so soon?" Artie pouted. "No, don't go just yet. Or if you do, can I come along? Heh, heh. Come. Sex jokes are so great."

"WHY DOES EVERYONE WANT TO BLOODY SLEEP WITH ME?"

All of the guys in the room turned to stare at Rory in wonder and amusement.

Shit. SHIT. I just said that aloud, didn't I? OH DAMN IT! Run, Rory! Run!

"What are you talking about?" Kurt laughed lightly.

"You!" Rory pointed at him. "And you!" He pointed at Blaine. "All of you!" You all want to sleep with me! You keep having all these…incredibly dirty…thoughts about me, and I for one can't stand it anymore!"

"Rory, do you have a fever or something?" Blaine shook his head. "You know I'm with Kurt. I don't want to sleep with you. Just relax."

"Yeah, and I'm straight," Puck said.

"I'm in love with Mercedes," Sam covered. "Sorry, dude."

"And I'm not into anyone right now," Artie lied. "You sure you're okay?"

"No," Rory willed his raging erection to go down. "I heard you! All of you! You all want to fuck me in one way or another!"

"We didn't say that," Artie shook his head. "Or think that."

"I think you should get some sleep, Rory," Kurt smiled kindly.

"Yeah," Rory pressed a hand to his forehead. "Yeah…um…bye," he said awkwardly, scooting out of the room as fast as he could.

"My house tonight?" Sam thought hopefully.

"No, he should have a threesome with me and Kurt/Blaine," Kurt and Blaine thought at the same time.

"Wish he'd just let me fuck him in the locker room showers," Puck sighed.

"He'll never want to sleep with me," Artie hung his head. "But I'm determined!"

Jesus Christ, Rory sighed as soon as he was a safe enough distance away. This is going to be a bloody long semester, isn't it?