Twenty two years. That's how long the three of them had been friends. It started with Phil and Doug, the poor guy was a nobody, one of the many invisibles, until one day a jock pushed him into a sandy haired blonde and the blonde, well he didn't like that at all! So rationally he decided it was a good idea to beat the crap out said jock. You see Phil was what we call an undesirable popular. He was cool, good looking, funny, but he kept to himself, out of others business. Until he saw fit that is. After that Phil invited Doug to his table at lunch, needless to say their friendship blossomed.
Stu was next, have you ever wondered why the man lets Phil treat him the way he does. Well here's why! It had been the same for Stu his whole life, the nerd, getting picked on and pushed down at every turn. But a math test changed all that; one fucking math test. Stu had been at his locker, he flinched when he saw someone walking close and stop next to him. He expected a gut punch, a push into the locker and some name calling. No, instead he got a bright smile and a question "hey man, I couldn't help but notice you got an A on the last test, want to earn some money?"
He tutored Phil for a little over a month and every day Phil watched the kid get tormented, telling himself it wasn't his business. You can guess what eventually happened. Phil got suspended for a few weeks and three jocks were cut from the team for injuries and behavior. The day Phil got back into to school he cut into the lunch line next to the nervous nerd, placed a cupcake on the boys tray and once Stu had paid for it led him over for all to see "Doug this is Stu, he's cool." He said taking a large bite out of the chocolate cupcake.
It was a year in when they met her. Gracie. Doug's parents had picked up Phil to drop at Stu's. When they got there she was all they heard, she wouldn't be quite, Mrs. Price looked close to tears, Mr. Price was about to have a breakdown but suddenly, it all paused, the adults turned and was amazed at what they saw. Three boys acting out a war scene with teddy bears over the small crib, the sapphire swirls twinkling with a small giggle as she watched them and Phil scoffed "and my mom says babies are hard work. You're not too bad, for a chick, are you princess"
Yep, that was it. That was all it took for Stu's baby sister to become the Darnation to their Musketeers.
TWENTY YEARS LATER
He's getting married. Who would have thought that loser could even get a girl, let alone one as cool as Tracy.
Yeah, times had changed but it was a good change, for the most part. I think…
Doug could not believe his luck when Sid had given him his most prized possession, his Mercedes! Alan was shocked to, even a bit jealous. Phil of course liked the car, and he knew before returning it he'd be behind the wheel.
Right now though they we're on their way to collect the youngest member of the group, Gracie, there had been some argument about her coming along. For one she's a girl, two she's Stu's baby sister, but honestly all argument was dropped when they came to the conclusion that that girl had already seen them at their worst and that it just wouldn't be the same without her.
They pull up to the campus; they spotted her instantly, the small, milky skinned girl in a wholesome floral sweater, jeans and dainty sneakers, honey kissed caramel curls blowing in the wind as she laughed and smiled to her friends. She looks the kind of girl you have wet dreams about but never peruse because you'd ruin her, not to mention she's a grade A student, just like her dorky brother.
Doug shouts with a smile "Gracie!"
She then turns to them with her sapphire gems and bids farewell to her friends, picking up her bag a skipping over. Yep Gracie really was the girl next door…
"Hey bitches! Nice pussy wagon" until she opened her mouth
Putting her bag in the trunk she smiles, climbing in much like Phil had but using a hand instead of a foot to jump in. she puts her feet on Phil's lap and says "come on fuckward move it. We have a damsel to save from a dragon!"
When they get outside of Stu's house Phil can't resist the urge to scream "Paging Dr. Faggot…. Dr. Faggot!"
Gracie smiles and kneels on the leather to shout "Stu! Awesome news, we finally found your balls! Turns out they where is mom's fuckhole all this time!"
As he opens the door his sister screams "move it fat ass before the dragon whore eats us…"
They all see Melissa through the window and about cause hell by coming outside, Stu run's into the car, almost crushing Gracie as Doug races off from the bitch fight about to happen. They all laugh apart from the one man wearing a cardigan "Why do you have to be so mean to her Grace?"
"Why does she have to keep breathing? Some questions will never have answers bro" she smiles while maneuvering herself into a more comfortable position, giving her brother a light peck on the cheek.
They all laugh and smile as Alan starts screaming and is flipped off by some kid, the brunette having finally got comfortable between Phil and Stu, sipping lightly at a beer she and Phil were sharing "Come on, just till Barstow. Everybody's passing us."
"Absolutely not. I promised Sid. I will be the only one driving this car. Besides, you're drinking." Doug states with a judgmental tone
"Oh, what are you, a cop now? You know I drive great when I'm drunk." The school teacher retorts, knowing he was right
And then back up by his back seat buddy's "True. Don't forget, Phil was always our designated drunk driver."
Handing the beer to the blond Gracie nods "yeah, and remember that party, sophomore year, Phil came to pick me up at one, we didn't get home until eight!"
Moving his arm to rest behind her Phil smile "I remember that party"
Sighing the driver asks "Yeah. You wanna explain it to them, Alan?
"Guys, my dad loves this car, more than he loves me, so, yeah." He says with a woeful tone, making Gracie feel kind of bad for the guy
But Phil, he just shakes his head in annoyance "Aw, whatever. I left my wife and kid at home so I could go with you guys. You know how difficult that was?"
Gracie just scoffs "yeah about as difficult as fucking a cheerleader"
Holding the bottle in his hand the blonde points to her "hey that's not as easy as you'd think!"
"You really did that for your friends. That's really sweet." Alan says to the man with earnest and pride, Gracie snatching the beer from his grip
"Dude, I was being sarcastic. I fucking hate my life. I may never go back. I might stay in Vegas. What do you think princess; people got sick animals in Vegas" he says with a low chuckle, Gracie was studying to be a vet, she liked animals, said their more genuine than people. As for the hit about his life, well, Phil loved his kid, Eli was ten and was pretty awesome, but he and Stefanie were a train wreck in a pile of dog shit. He knocked her up back in collage after just a few weeks of dating, but give the man his due, I stepped up to the mark and married her.
Stefanie was a nice woman really, a good mom to, she and Phil just seemed to hate each other, they say opposites attract, they fucking lied!
Gracie smiles up at his question and shrugs "fuck it, I'll strip!"
"No you will not! You will never take off your clothes in view of anyone, ever!" Stu quickly chimes in, half joking have serious
This gives the girl a pout as she says "what, you think I'm not good enough to be a stripper?"
Phil scoffs and shakes his head "he's your brother. He still thinks you're a virgin for fucks sake. Personal I think you'd make a fantastic stripper"
She smiles and leans into hug him and says mockingly "aw thanks Phil and you know you'd always be my favorite customer"
He offers her a smile, Stu shaking his head in horror as Doug asks "Am I all right over there, Alan?
"Yeah, you're good." Is the man's only reply
Suddenly they drive right into the curve of and eighteen wheeler. They swear and scream, Stu moving instinctively to cover his sister, but her head is already buried into Phil's chest, his arm that was around her back now holding her protectively "Aw, Jesus Christ!"
As the shock wears off Phil bursts out laughing along with Alan "That's funny."
"It's not funny." Says Doug in a pissed off tone
Leaning forward to punch the bearded man hard in the arm Gracie says "fucking asshole!"
