A/N: I am so sorry! I know I promised you a new story weeks ago but I've been very busy with my scouts and Elva and what not. But here I am! And ready to write!

Disclaimer: If I owned Murtagh, emm, I mean Eragon, would I be here writing fan fiction? Actually, I probably would, just not for Eragon. So no I do not own Eragon….yet… Eeep don't kill me Evil flying Monkeys!

Last story:

CRASH!!! A huge bang was heard from the kitchen.

The group ran in to find the table flung across the room and Roran cornering Spidey into the corner of the room.

"Damn you Spidey! You steal my girlfriend, my dignity and then beat me at chess! I won't have it!" Roran yelled as he brought the newspaper down.

SPLAT!

SheepSheepSheepSheepSheep

Chapter 1: Splat!

--The Kitchen--

"Owww! That hurt!" screamed Roran as an Apple Pie collided with the side of his head.

"Katrina? How could you?!" he screeched.

"I couldn't let you harm my Spidey! What kind of monster could kill a defenceless little spider?!" Katrina yelled back.

Roran turned around to face Spidey who was looking up at him with his innocent little eyes. All 8 of them.

"I hate you" Roran muttered to him.

Katrina picked up Spidey and headed towards the door.

Spidey turned around in her arms and smirked at Roran.

"This is not over you bloody spider! I will have my revenge!" Roran shouted as Katrina left.

"Well. Didn't see that coming." Kendra said.

"Lucky you" replied Murtagh.

"Did you?" Kendra asked.

"Yeah. I saw Katrina get the pie and I knew there'd be trouble." He replied.

"Shit" Nasuada cut in.

"What?" asked Arya.

"We left Eragon alone with Lauren." Nasuada answered.

"Meh. Maybe they'll kill each other." said Murtagh.

"No need to sound so hopeful Murtagh." said Kendra.

"A man can dream can't he?" He replied as he walked out.

SheepSheepSheepSheepSheep

--The Lounge--

"You were callin' me a pikey! You were disrespectin' my family! You were callin' my mum poor!" Lauren screamed at Eragon.

"That was well out of order that." said Liese.

"Where did you come from?" asked Murtagh as he walked in.

"Well right. I was over at Ryan's. But Lauren wasn't there cuz she was 'ere. And Ryan was there all "Why isn't Lauren here? Where's Lauren? When will she be here?" and I got so annoyed like I walked out and I'm glad I did, right, cuz it was mushup" Liese replied.

"Alright. Forget I asked." Murtagh said.

"Murtagh. Would you do the honours of giving Lauren the tour?" Nasuada asked.

"Emm. Do I have a choice?" Murtagh asked.

"No." she replied.

"Fine." he said "Come on Lauren."

SheepSheepSheepSheepSheep

--The Tour--

--The Prison--

"Is he an evil man? Is he an evil man? Is he an evil man? Is he an evil man?" Lauren asked.

"They're all evil men, Lauren." Murtagh replied.

"Is she an evil man?" Lauren asked.

"That's Durza, Lauren." Murtagh answered, stifling a laugh.

"So, Is she an evil man?" she asked again.

"Yes Lauren. Yes she, I mean he is." Murtagh replied getting extremely pissed off at this stage.

"Are they all Lex Luther?" she asked?

Murtagh stopped walking and banged his head of the wall.

"Some one kill me now." he muttered.

--The Lounge--

"I wonder how Murtagh is doing." said Nasuada.

"Well, he's been stuck with Lauren for the last hour. 10 bucks says he's wishing someone would just kill him."

Spidey scuttled past and under the study door.

"Get back here you damn spider!" Roran yelled as he ran.

He went to go into the study but he forgot to open the door.

Smack!

"Ouf!" Roran said as he hit the ground, unconscious.

"Hey peoples. We're back. And what the fuck happened here?!" Murtagh asked as he and Lauren entered the room.

"Well Spidey.." Kendra began.

"Actually. I don't want to know." Murtagh cut her off.

"Understandable." Kendra replied.

"Where's Eragon?" Murtagh asked.

"Emm I don't know actually."

--The sky--

Eragon and Saphira were flying over the Beor Mountains when Eragon decided to start singing.

"I used to think that I could not go on
And life was nothing but an awful song
But now I know the meaning of true love
I'm leaning on the everlasting arms

If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it"

"Stop singing Eragon." Said Saphira

"I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread my wings and fly away
I believe I can soar
I see me running through that open door
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly"

Eragon continued to sing.

"I believe that if you don't shut the hell up now, I'll throw you off and let you fly yourself!" Saphira said.

"But, but I'm practising for the X Factor!" Eragon replied.

"…….." Said Saphira.

--Uru'baen--

"Durza! Where is my hot chocolate and Marshmallows?" screamed Galbatorix.

"Emm. My King, Durza was captured by the Varden last week." said Jiminy, the Kings personal guard.

"But who will watch the Teletubbies with me?!" said Galbatorix.

"And who will watch the care bears with me? And play Spongebob? And get me cookies and milk? And get me Mr Snuggles when I feel sad?!" sobbed Galbatorix.

"Emm. I'm sure we can find some one else My King." Jiminy replied.

"But, but I want Durza!!!" He screamed.

"We were gonna play hairdressers!!"

"Emm. I could play hairdressers with you if it pleased you My King." Jiminy offered.

"It's not the same. I want Mr Snuggles screamed Galbatorix.

"My King, it seems that the Varden has taken Mr Snuggles too." said Jiminy.

"Mr Snuggles? NNNOOO! What about Mr snowman?!! And Stoney (The Green Egg)(Pictures of Mr Snuggles and Mr Snowman on my profile)?" Screamed Galbatorix throwing a tantrum.

"Stoney and Mr Snowman are gone too My King." Jiminy replied, scared now.

"NNNNOOOO!!!! This means War!" Galbatorix yelled.

--The Varden--

"Whoa." Murtagh said.

"What?" asked Kendra

"Why did I just get the feeling that Galbatorix just declared war on us?" He asked.

"Probably because we captured his Teddy Bear, Toy Snowman, the Green Dragon Egg and Durza and he probably only found out now." Kendra answered.

"Ahh. Makes sense. Well makes as much sense as anything around here." Murtagh said.

"Yeah. I'm hungry. Let's go eat." Kendra said as she got up off the wall.

"Okay." said Murtagh as the walked towards the Kitchens.

--Nasuada's study--

"Murtagh, Kendra. Good we're all here. I called you all to tell you that Galbatorix has assembled an army and is planning a full scale attack on the Varden." Nasuada said.

"Hmm. So I was right." said Murtagh.

"Yes and that's not the worst of it." Nasuada replied.

"What there's something worse than Murtagh being right?" asked Arya.

"Yeah. Eragon being right." Murtagh said.

"Hey!" Eragon said.

" He has got a point." said Kendra.

"Children! What I'm trying to tell you is….. Galbatorix… has an army of Cheese Monkeys." said Nasuada.

"Ha! I told you! I told you all! I was right! Galbatorix does have Cheese Monkeys! I win!" Eragon screamed.

"Eragon is right and Galbatorix has Cheese Monkeys. Yep. It's official. We're screwed." Murtagh said.

BANG!

"What the fuck?" yelled Kendra as everyone ducked.

A huge hole was blasted in the wall.

"Hahahahahahahahahahaha!" I'll teach you to take my Mr Snuggles, Mr Snowman and Stoney!!! Oh, and Durza."

Galbatorix exclaimed as he stepped through the hole.

"Shit." Murtagh said.

"Crap." Kendra agreed.

"We're dead." Arya said.

"Is he an Evil Man?!" asked Lauren.

SheepSheepSheepSheepSheep

I want at least 5 reviews before I update!

A/n: Not one of my better chapters but oh well. I'll try and do better on the next chapter. Yes I know I left ye with a cliffhanger. My bad. I'll make it up to you.. I promise. Although last time I promised to give you this story in 2 days and that was at least 3 weeks ago. Now press the Purpley button on the left and Review!

Dragon Rider Murtagh