Demon Angel
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! YOU FELL FOR THE SUMMARY!!!!! I WUZ JUS' KIDDIN'!!!! THIS ISN'T A STORY BOUT ICHIGO AND RUKIA AND THE SOUL REAPERS FROM THE MANGA "BLEACH." SORRY. IF YA WANNA READ ANOTHER STORY BOUT SOMEONE OR SOMETHING ELSE, READ ON AND REVIEW AT THE END. IF NOT, PLEASE EXIT THE THEATER AND WATCH ANOTHER ROMANTIC COMEDY BOUT MAXIE AND FANGY-POO FROM MAXIMUM RIDE OR BOUT BELLSIES AND EDDIE FROM TWILIGHT.
Tito POV
Hello, there. I am a dog. I am also a talking dog. Like in the movie, "Up." But they make a nuisance of dogs. Dogs are not like that. Especially me. I am a fierceness poodle with no fluffiness. (EW!!!!!!!!) My name is Tito. But on my collar, it reads, 'Tit' because the 'o' faded away. My stupid owner by the name of Brennan forgot to make me another collar. Or at least put the 'o' in. Every time I meet some cute chick, they see my name tag, give me a dirty look, and walk away. Poor me.
My owner Brennan is a fat, fugly, fucking conceited and racist boy. He is also very perverted. And stupid. Why is he my owner? NONE OF YA BEESWAX YA BEYOTCH-AYS!!!!!!!!! LAY OFF OF ME!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now that we have that little section covered, I would like to tell you a story. It is about a dog. Me. And his goddamn cursed owner. Brennan. A.k.a BIZ-NITCH.
Okay, here's how the story of the poor lonely dog and the BIZ-NITCH goes.
A Jar Of Hummus And A Hose And A Flying Evil Squirrel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Third Person
"C'mon, Tit!!!! Ya gots some moes wok t' do!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hurry up!!!!!!!!!!!! I wanna watch Hugh Heffer-doodle shave his legs!!!!!!!!!!!!! Whoo he's a fine piece o' hotness right there packed in that tight ass and bell-lay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" BIZ-NITCH yelled at his poor doggy.
Tit, excuse me, Tito, coughTitcough, wanted to whine and say, "Ya BIZ-NITCH!!!!!!!!!!!! Nobody cares what ya wanna watch!!!!!!!!!!! Wait, Hugh Heffer-doodle!?! Wait for me ya conceited asshole!!!!!!!!!!!"
But poor Titty-Tit-Titness was left outside. (Titty-Tit-Titness is my awesomeness nickname for him) So Tit decided to sneak in. He did not know how though. Finally he decided to jump through the window. When he finally achieved that goal, he went through Brennan's excessive jewelry and sunglasses collection and put on a gold chain necklace with a big dollar sign and black sunglasses.
He ran to the living room where BIZ-NITCH and his cronies sat: FUGLY-ASSHOLE, I-HAVE-HERPES-IN-MY-MOUTH, AND DICK-WAD. They were all watching Hugh Heffer-doodle shave his legs. Tit went forward to watch, but BIZ-NITCH blocked his way.
"Are ya wearin' me stuff doggy poggy?" he asked. Then Tit did an incredible thing. He stood up on his hind legs and crossed his front 'arms' together. He moved his head to the right while his body stayed in one place.
"Yo, BIZ-NITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why don't you, FUGLY-ASSHOLE, I-HAVE-HERPES-IN-MY-MOUTH and DICK-WAD go sum where else and chillax? This is my dump!!!!!!!!!!! Ya don't go messin' round wit my brotha's and sista's houses!!!!!!!! I'll thrash you!!!!!!!"
Tit leaped forward and pointed his muzzle for BIZ-NITCH. As he started descending, he thought he could make it. It was a cool thing to watch: Tit was all spread out like a flying eagle.
DICK-WAD whispered to FUGLY-ASSHOLE, "Maybe, like in dat movie, "Up," we can say, 'flying squirrel' instead of 'squirrel' and Tit will drop to da flo." FUGLY-ASSHOLE agreed.
One, two, three………
"FLYING SQUIRREL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" DICK-WAD and FUGLY-ASSHOLE shouted. After they finished, I-HAVE-HERPES-IN-MY-MOUTH finally caught on.
"FLYING SQUIRREL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" he yelled ten seconds later after his two friends finished. Tit wasn't deterred. Until he saw a real squirrel outside the window jumping oddly. He suddenly dropped from the air and looked around. When he finally spotted a jar of hummus, he dove for it. He picked up his hose, still on two feet, and ran outside.
He reached the squirrel and injected the hose with hummus immediately. He gave a warlike cry and started spraying the hummus at the squirrel.
"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" he looked down at the jar and it was empty. Tit's cry never stopped as his eyes widened. No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! His bravado soon turned into a scream as he stared at the squirrel that was still jumping oddly. Tit started hyperventilating until he finally fainted from stress and lack of air. The squirrel stopped jumping. BIZ-NITCH said from inside, "Thank goodness that squirrel came on time."
DICK-WAD smiled a toothy smile and brought his thick, hairy, muscular arm out from a hole under the wall. He laughed stupidly. "Ya like my puppet too? It's cute ain't it?" he asked as he cooed to his puppet and stroked the fake fur on the fake squirrel's chin.
THE END!
I MEAN NO OFFENSE TO ACCENTS OR "BROTHA'S AND SISTA'S" EITHER. SUFFICE IT TO SAY, I MEAN NO OFFESE IN ANYTHING I WROTE. K? REVIEW AND I WRITE MORE AND MORE STUPID STUFF THAT HAPPENS WITH MY DOG, TWITCHY! WELL, THAT'S NOT HIS NAME BUT WE CALL HIM THAT CUZ HE'S TINY AND HE TWITCHES IN HIS SLEEP. HIS REAL NAME IS…………. TITO. JUST KIDDIN'! I AIN'T TELLIN' YOU!!!!!!!!!!! BUT…………. REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! _ =P
