It had been two hours since they had went to the Steve's room. Two and a half hours since the power went out. Bucky had been certain it was due to the snow storm, but Steve was convinced Bucky forgot to pay their bills this time. He had danced around the subject when they were pulling out candles to light their apartment. Steve always did this. When in most times he'd be right, in the morning he'd be proven wrong.
If anything, heat was the main concern for Bucky right now. It was in the middle of winter and their apartment was cold and shitty. Steve's room was smaller and could heat up faster. If it wasn't for the huge comforter that was covering the matress, Bucky was sure Steve would freeze. He was small and thin. The cold devasted him easily and Bucky wished he could just hold Steve close to keep him warm and safe forever, but Steve was too stubborn and prideful.
No matter what the reason was, Steve would have rejected him. Steve depended on no one, he wanted to make the most of himself by himself. Bucky knew he wasn't a child who needed his hand held every step of the way, but sometimes he did act like a child. A helping hand was never a bad idea or a sign of defeat, it let you realize that you're not alone and that you're only human.
But Steve wanted to be Superman and solve everything himself, like the world only existed to keep him down, when it was only his own negativity that was keeping him firmly planted to the ground. And when he wasn't complaining he spent his spare time hating himself. Bucky was suprised he wasn't suicidal, but he sure sounded like it at times. And sometimes Bucky worried about that thought.
He pushed it out of his head. He wanted to be back in the cold apartment with Steve alive and well, not in the dark damp place his mind had taken him to. Besidnes,this felt more real. Him and Steve sitting across from eachother in the flickering candlelight. Not talking about anything in particular, but not exactly ready to go to bed.
Steve picked at loose thread on his blanket and twirled it around his index finger. Bucky stared blankly into space trying to figure out a topic to discuss in the dark glow of Steve's room. All Bucky could think about was how exquisite Steve look in this lighting, any lighting really. There were shadows underneath his pronounced cheekbone that dared to dance over his lips.
Those lips that felt so familiar, but fleeting at the same time. Bucky had kissed Steve before, had told him how he felt. Steve didn't look at him any different, in fact, he was the one who kissed Bucky. Steve leant in to Bucky's space, into Bucky's touch, his lips. Steve put his tongue into Bucky's mouth and swirled it around curiously as if to test to himself and Bucky. Both of their faces heating up and flushing. The tingle that went through Bucky's spine as he cupped Steve's face. Two grown men kissing. Two friends kissing.
But not only kissing. Bucky laying Steve down on his back and running his hands over bony hips and ribs. Hands sneaking under thin fabric to caress warm skin that was so willing to surrender to the slightest whisper of the touch. Steve whimpering into Bucky's mouth. Steve pulling back to catch his breath. Steve opening up so easily and letting go of his pride.
Bucky's face was hot and beet red. He was somewhat happy Steve couldn't see his face. A lump in his throat made his breath catch and he tried to swallow past it.
"Do you wanna do something tomorrow?" Bucky said absently.
Steve look at his wrist watch. It read 12:36 am.
"Today is tomorrow," Steve said plainly.
Bucky rolled his eyes incredulously."You know what I mean," Bucky bit out grudgingly.
Steve's jaw was clenching rhythmically as if he was discreetly chewing gum in class. He seemed to be in deep thought, considering the option. Weighing pros and cons, and knowing Steve as well as he did, the cons weighed heavy in Steve's favor. Always making an excuse not to go out. Steve bit his bottom lip and Bucky couldn't help but stare.
His teeth should be there. Biting and sucking gently. Drawing out little gasps and moans that made Steve lips curl into a prominent "o" shape. Dragging his tongue over smooth warm skin. Having Steve squirm beneath him as he held him down firmly by the wrists. To make Steve give in and give up willingly to Bucky. To let Steve get lost and finally let Bucky show him he is loved. show him that he's safe with Bucky. Being so careful just for Steve. Just for his friend.
"I don't know..." came the all too familiar reply. Steve's eyebrows were tightly stitched together as he fidgeted with his watch.
"It doesn't matter," Bucky sighed."We don't have any money for fun anyway."
Bucky sounded truly disappointed. He loved going places with Steve and seeing him have a good time. But it seems those days were gone without a trace.
Steve looked down and exhaled lightly,"It wouldn't matter if I was there anyway."
It took Bucky a moment to process what Steve had said and he suddenly felt anger bubbling up in him. Steve had brought himself down before, but to say he didn't matter was just plain... Stupid!
Did nothing Bucky say last week, when they had kissed, mean anything? Did it not sink in?
"Hey! You shut up about that, okay Steve?"
So Bucky sounded a little harsher than he wanted to, maybe a stronger tone would leave a better imprint this time.
"You do matter. And if you think otherwise, you're a fool,"Bucky said a little tightly.
Steve lowered his shoulders and looked away from Bucky's glare. The candles flickered wildly around them and shadow danced across Steve's face. Outside the window snow still fell in collected on the ground.
"Then I guess I'm a fool," came the meek reply.
Bucky's face heated up and he wanted to slap Steve in the mouth. Bucky felt that maybe he should just leave so Steve can wallow in self pity, but he'd be damned if he left Steve with pessimistic thoughts.
"You've said some stupid things before Steve, but," he paused," that has to be the most idiotic and asinine thing you've ever said."
Bucky was through with sugar coating it for Steve. He was acting like a child, said he was going to be scolded like one.
"I'm sick and tired of you bringing yourself down. Acting like the whole world has it in for you, when it's just you!"
Steve's eyes were glued to Bucky the whole time. His face was heated and he felt like hiding. Bucky has never yelled at him befor. Bucky stood up from where he sat on the bed to stand beside Steve with his back turned him.
"You always sell yourself short," he bit out. his hands were on his hips and he looked out the window absently.
Steve uncrossed his legs, to dangle them off the side. He swallowed thickly and said,"But I am. I'm short. I'm skinny. I'm a faggot.
The last word came out as a confession, rather than a mock, but it made Bucky's skin crawl all the same. Steve may have been referring to himself, but that didn't make it okay and if Steve was a faggot, so was Bucky. Bucky was the one to admit it first, bur Steve was the one who actually asserted the kiss. He may be short and skinny, but didn't make him incapable. Bucky loved him for who he is, not for what he could or couldn't do.
Bucky turned around to glower at Steve and found his attitude too distasteful. What bucky did next was beyond his control. Bucky's arms flew out to slap Steve across the face. His palm landed against Steve's cheek was harsh sound and Steve was taken aback for a moment. Steve was bent over to one side with a hand held to his reddening cheek. He turned his face up to where Bucky was standing. Light flashing across a softer expression.
"I'm sorry, but you need to learn when to shut your mouth," Bucky gritted.
Steve's eyes were wide and he felt even smaller with Bucky's dominating presence looming over him. Steve was shocked that Bucky had it in himself to actually hit him. Bucky went to kneel in front of Steve.
"You know you're more than that," Bucky said ardently,"so much more."
Steve's hands trembled in Bucky's and he thought he'd cry. Bucky ran his hands affectionately over the back of the smaller man's hands and stared soulfully into his eyes. Steve couldn't help but lean into Bucky's hand when it was raised to the cheek that was smacked. It was warm against his face despite the cold atmosphere.
Steve had felt like an idiot. He always heard what Bucky said, but never took it to heart. This time Steve knew Bucky was serious. He knew Bucky meant what he said and he knew he wasn't playing. Steve needed to get hit and it needed to be from Bucky. It was what Steve needed to see what he was worth. Bucky's other hand cupped the side he didn't hit and rose up to meet Steve a few inches away from his face. A frown stained Bucky's face and his jaw was clenched. Steve never saw Bucky this distraught and he was being a selfish bastard. Not everything was about Steve.
"I love you, Buck," Steve choked out. He stumbled with the words and his voice cracked. Steve was on the verge of tears from all the pent up emotions and delicate touches.
"God dammit Steve, I love you too," Bucky beamed.
Bucky gave him a soft smile and leant forward to peck Steve on the lips. Steve's entire body lit up with warmth and responded back with a kiss of his own. Wet lips pressed against wet lips. Back and forth they exchanged tiny pecks, each stamped with silent declarations of love. Bucky pushed Steve on his back as the kisses deepend. Bucky climbed on top of Steve's lithe form and kept himself propped up on one elbow.
The dancing shadows around the small room disguised the couple, because the walls had eyes and they weren't welcomed.
Steve's hands came up to rest on Bucky's chest and tried to keep up with Bucky's enthusiastic lips. Steve slid his tongue in to slow Bucky down and give him something new to explore. Bucky lightly brushed his hand over Steve's stomach and flicked his tongue over the small moan that left those kiss swollen lips. The hands on Bucky's pecs rubbed and gripped lightly. They ran to Bucky's biceps and tight stomach. Steve marveled at Bucky's physique, appreciating each defined muscle.
The man above him chuckles softly and his mouth and pulled away to say,"I see you have a fixation." Bucky sucked on Steve's bottom lip and Steve huffed out a gasp. He bent down to lick at the vein on Steve's thin neck. Steve's breath hitched and Bucky smiled. "I must tell you," he paused to plant a kiss to Steve's neck,"I think your body's pretty sexy Steve."
Bucky bit down on the spot he licked and Steve practically yelped in surprise. Steve's legs fell open and Bucky moved between then and pressed his hips up against Steve's. Steve could feel Bucky hard against his butt and shuddered. The thin fabric of Bucky's pajama pants didn't do anything to disguise how turned on he was. Bucky bit and sucked on the skin of Steve's neck and rocked his hips against him. Steve was moaning and wincing each time the biting or sucking got a little harder. And Steve could feel himself getting stiff.
Bucky gripped Steve's hands and put them over his head to hold them down by the wrists. He reeled back to admire the red spot on Steve's neck. Teeth marks embedded into soft skin.
"You're mine now, Stevie," Bucky murmured.
The sight of Steve was beautiful. Cheeks flushed to a rosey red, panting. He was completely undone. A wreck. A truly exquisite mess. Bucky bent down to kiss Steve on the lips to seal the deal. A stray hand left one of Steve's wrists to make a B-line straight to his cock.
Steve gasped at the touch and the hand squeezed, testing the border of pain and pleasure. Bucky kissed Steve mindlessly as he rubbed at the bulge in Steve's pants. It was different than his own hand and better. Steve had never been touched like this before and considering it was Bucky who was touching him, it was beyond belief good. Bucky's touch was precise and he knew how to move his hand just right. Their tongues slid along eachother with only a smdgen of precision.
"Still think you don't matter?" Bucky sounded out of breath and gave Steve's cock a firm squeeze.
"Ah! No!"
Steve was over worked and Bucky was pushing too many buttons all at once. Steve was squirmming, his hands struggled against Bucky's clutch and he whined.
"So many things I want to do to you," Bucky chuckled. "Do you wanna cum, Steve?"
Steve moaned in reply. It was all too much too fast and he felt his body go into fits.
"Not like this, Buck. I want you inside me when I cum," Steve moaned. "Tomorrow?"
Bucky's hand stopped its exploring and brought it up to stroke Steve's face. Bucky rolled off to one side to bring the smaller man close in an embrace. He kissed the side of Steve's head and put a hand on his chest. Steve's cock thribbed painfully and he'd hate himself later for not letting Bucky finish him off, but he wanted the first time with Bucky to be special. Not a quick and shameless handjob in the dark. Surely Bucky felt the same.
Steve turned into Bucky's warm arms and his eyes were focused on Bucky's cheeky little grin. Bucky seemed on the verge of cracking up and Steve was lost.
"What?"
Bucky shook his head and snickered lightly to himself with his eyes close.
After he was through giggling like a girl, he pecked Steve once more on the lips and replied,"Why Steven Rogers... Today is tomorrow.
Steve scoffed and rolled his eyes at Bucky's mocking tone. Served him right, afterall he was the one who used the same smartass remark first.
Knowing the tables had turned on him (and Bucky would tease him later) he bitterly said,"You know what I mean."
Bucky woke up the next morning with Steve's lithe form curled into his side. He reached out a hand and smoothed the hair out of Steve's face. Bucky smiled, moving slightly to adjust his body in a more comfortable position, holding the other man in his arms. He laid like that for half an hour, just admiring his small friend. His BEST friend.
Steve stirred a little, his mind still somewhat foggy of last night and who was holding him. Bucky watched Steve as he blinked a few times and his eyes dialated to the light coming in through the window. Steve felt warm despite the temperature of the room; wrapped up in blanket and Bucky. It was like he was taking a warm bath and when he noticed Bucky awake and smiling, he cuddled closer. Clinging, humming in delight.
Bucky craned his head down and pecked Steve on the lips, his hand trailing down a sharp hipbone and squeezing only slightly. Steve sighed contently and kissed Bucky back, this time more lingering.
Pulling back Bucky said,"I'm sorry I hit you last night."
Steve huffed a laugh and closed his eyes for a moment. He knew Bucky was sorry, but he also knew he deserved it. Besides, it's not like Bucky really hurt him, so he shouldn't be sorry.
"I've had worse happen to me," Steve murmured.
Bucky laughed softly against Steve's lips and, in a way that already felt routine, grabbed Steve by the hip to bring them chest to chest. He started trailing kisses along Steve's jaw, dipping down sometimes to nip at his throat. Steve licked his lips and tried to contain little excited sounds that dared to tumble out.
"I thought you wanted to do something today," Steve gasped when Bucky licked a line up to his ear.
"Change of plan. I found something else I wanna do today," Bucky whispered hotly into Steve's ear. He nibbled the lobe and paused. "Pun totally intended," he smiled.
He sucked lightly on the Steve's ear and tongued the shell, earning him surprised gasps. He laid Steve on his back and crawled between his open legs. Steve brought his hands up to Bucky's shoulders and gripped tightly as Bucky's teeth nipped at the spot just below his ear. Bucky went down to Steve's throat to suck bruising teeth marks into the skin, eying the one he made the night before.
Steve raised up off the bed by reflex and rubbed his crotch against Bucky's. Done in by a hickey, he was already turned on and when Bucky pressed into the contact, they both moaned. This time they weren't going to stop.
Bucky sat up on his knees to look down at Steve. He pulled his shirt up over his head and tossed it aside. Steve rose up to do the same. When Steve laid back down, the man above him grabbed the hem of his pajama bottoms, along with his underwear, and pulled them down and off his legs. Fully exposed to Bucky.
He bent down over Steve to tongue at the slit. It sent a jolt through his body when Bucky lick up the underside and then proceeded to wrap his lips around the head of his cock. Bucky's mouth was hot, slippery, and too wet for it's own good. His pouty lips were a darker pink than usually and seeing how every inch of his cock disappeared into that hot confined cavity, only seemed to turn him on more. Bucky's saliva dripped down the shaft and his lips curled and plumped up obscenely when he managed to get Steve's cock lodged in the back of his throat. Bucky stilled with a sound of satisfaction, his gag reflex practically non existent by now, and connected gaze with Steve.
Steve almost came from that alone. It was safe to say Bucky has done this before. But with who? Steve couldn't possibly care, because right now the only that mattered was that Bucky was HIS. Bucky slowly rose off of Steve's cock; lips looking even fuller. Steve shuddered when Bucky when back down, all the way, and repeated. Bucky went slow, sucking gently, making sure this was all about passion and not just sex. There was a difference.
Bucky had Steve moaning underneath him and Bucky gripped the base of Steve's cock to stroke and twist. Steve's hips were moving, on their own accord, up into the gentle suction. When things got to be too much for him, he'd put a hand in Bucky's hair and pull lightly in warning. After Bucky had teased and neared Steve to orgasm, he felt it was time.
His pants and underwear were pulled off to bare himself to Steve. Steve got a good look at Bucky's endowments and his heart leapt. He was big, to say the least, and Steve knew he could trust Bucky to be gentle. But if Steve was sure, Bucky was about to prepare him and even though Bucky would be thorough, it was still going to hurt. Bucky sensed the worry in Steve's eyes.
"I won't break you Stevie," Bucky whispered and kissed a path down Steve's skinny body. "Trust me."
Bucky was down below Steve now, pressing the flat of his tongue against the most secret and intimate part of Steve. He never felt something like that before. He was still a virgin in many ways and Bucky knew this. It felt strange, but Bucky seemed to know what to do. The tongue probed and teased along the ring of muscle, it loosened him up a little and soon two fingers were pushing inside. Bucky must've sucked on them beforehand.
There was slight discomfort when they initially entered, then faded when the fingers curled into the right place. Steve gasped and hardly noticed when Bucky inserted another finger.
Bucky watched Steve squirm in the sheets and twisted handfuls of blankets. He moved his fingers shallowly inside Steve and licked around the spot where they were joined. He scissored his fingers until Steve started to feel more relaxed and loose. Slowly withdrawing his hand, he sat up and moved into place.
"Ready?" Bucky asked.
Steve nodded and Bucky slicked himself up with saliva. It wasn't the best solution for love making, but it was their only one at the moment. Bucky gripped the base and positioned it at Steve's entrance. Steve held his breath and caught Bucky's eye. They held contact for a beat and, without looking away, Bucky pressed and pushed into Steve.
It burned at first, but Steve could handle it; he somewhat liked the pain. It felt real. Bucky bit his lip to contain a groan and cautiously entered Steve's tiny body. Steve took in a sharp breath when Bucky hit rock bottom inside him. Bucky's cock was nestled perfectly that it was rested against Steve's prostate. When he moved, Steve whimpered and clenched around his cock.
Steve was tight, untouched, and it sent a shiver up his spine knowing he was the first to have Steve. He withdrew out of Steve, then pushed back in to see how Steve was handling him so far. Bucky got more bold when Steve starting moaning and begging for more.
"It hurts, Buck," Steve sobbed.
"I can stop?" It was a question, because honestly, Bucky didn't want to stop.
"No. I want it. More? Please?"
Bucky had a hand planted on either side of Steve's shoulders and began to trust in and out of Steve. Hands came up and pawed at his chest as he set up a steady rhythm. Bucky's cock was sliding roughly into him and he grinded down each chance he got. The burning friction was doing it for him and he wanted more of it. He wrapped his legs around Bucky's slim waist and threw his arms above his head.
Steve gnawed on his bottom lip until Bucky came down to claim him with a kiss. It was all tongue and teeth. Bucky's cock and tongue were dominating him all at once.
Bucky broke away and turned Steve on his side. He took Steve's left leg and hiked it over his shoulder as the remained on the bed. Bucky bent forward, stretching Steve's leg to the limit, and kissed him again. Bucky's big hand held Steve's ankle firmly and he swore Steve was moaning more, as if he got off on discomfort.
"You like this? Being bent into a tiny little fuck toy?" Bucky growled.
Steve only moaned in response. He swore his dick got even more hard at Bucky's words. He was indirectly called a whore and it turned him on even more. Bucky was joking, of course. He didn't really think of Steve as a whore, but when he noticed Steve getting more into it he continued.
"One of these days I'll have to get you to suck me off," Bucky said lowly. "See if you'll gag on it."
He watched Steve convulse slightly and cum all over himself. Bucky smiled, satisfied, and thrusted sharply into Steve flexing hole. He was going faster and more shallow, making Steve's sensitive prostate even more so. Steve was riding it out like a trooper, gritting his teeth and practically screaming out Bucky's name. His real name, in fact.
Bucky drove in firmly because Steve was clenching around him every so often that it made it hard for movement. He could feel the end nearing and he leant down to claim Steve's lips once again, hips studdering and jerking.
"Fuck! Your body's just too small and tight," he gritted out before he finally exploded inside of Steve's shaken, lithe form.
His cock throbbed and pumped cum into Steve's channel and Bucky still thrusted regardless of being sensitive. It was, by far, his best orgasm to date and Steve's first time. He was completely emptied and comfortable, but here was Steve bent in half and most likely sore. He let Steve's leg fall from his shoulder and laid down next to him again.
"You okay?" Bucky asked worried. He looked over at Steve and Steve couldn't help but smile from ear to ear.
"The foreplay was torture, but the sex was amazing," Steve beamed.
"Amazing, huh?" Bucky asked, all too smugly.
"Even though it hurt like hell," Steve finished. "It was perfect."
"We should've done that last night."
"I didn't want to do it in the dark. I wanted to see all of you." Steve paused a moment. "We could've done it if the bill was paid."
"Are you gonna start that again? I told you it was because of the snow storm last night," Bucky huffed.
"Sure. Remember when yo-"
Bucky cut Steve off with kiss and said,"I love you, Steve. So just shut up and suck me off already."
"How charming," Steve said sarcastically.
Bucky grinned and laughed heartily. Steve got out of bed and reached for the lamp beside his bed and when it clicked on he felt his face get warm with embarrassment. Bucky peeked over and shook his head.
"Told you I paid the bill," Bucky teased.
