My very first fan fiction XD I know my English is bad but review please~~
Oh, I also have deviantart account, here's the username~~, .com
I have 2 Junjou Romantica fan arts if anyone want to see them :D Okay back to the story
Egoist pairing
"Where am I?"
That thought came instantly to Hiroki's brain as he saw the endless black, the place where he stood now. He could not feel anything, nor he could see anything, as he just walked and walked in this darkness abyss.
"Just where the heck am I?!" he mumbled annoyingly as the wrinkles came as well to his face. Somehow he felt lonely now. He was hoping at least he is not alone. Usually, in normal condition he would want to talk and chat with Akihiko, even he missed that damn Miyagi. But of course, our Hiroki just only remember one thing in his head at time like this, doesn't he?? Only one person, one word.
"Nowaki…"
Then, just like a magic, there stood Nowaki in front of Hiroki, make the older man yelped a "WHOA!!" because of his own surprise, as he stumbled his own foot and fall. Nowaki caught him on time.
"Are you alright, Hiro-san?"
Nowaki leaned, to see if anything happened to his beloved one, while that beloved could not stop himself from blushed furiously.
"Ba… baka, I'm okay!! You didn't need to help me!!"
Hiroki pushed Nowaki instantly. We all know Hiroki was actually very happy that Nowaki care about him, but of course, his annoying high pride made him did not want to look weak. And again, he is older than Nowaki about 4 years. He definitely did not want to look like happy or girly (for Hiroki, if he felt happy, he felt like girl ^^;), but that action, made Nowaki kinda sad. Seeing that damn disappointed face, Hiroki felt guilty right after that.
Urrgh… why did he have to put that face!!! It makes me look like the bad one here!!
"Well, uh… umm…" he tried to speak. Nowaki listened confusedly.
"Uh… but, thank you…"
Nowaki could not help it but chuckled when he heard that. He knew that was meant to be an apology. That 's just like his Hiro-san. And that's what make Hiroki is so cute and adorable for him, while he could see Hiroki's cheeks became more and more beautiful with that red colors of blushing.
"Hiro-san is so cute." He smiled warmly.
"Baka!! Don't say something like that"
"But you are," Nowaki stepped forward, made Hiroki took a step back, but a warm big hand caught his face and force Hiroki's eyes to look at Nowaki's. "So, cute."
Hiroki could have sworn he just heard a big TA-DUMPH from his heart and felt his face is so hot because of the embarassement. He looked at Nowaki's seductive face.
Da… damn…
"Ba… baka… I'm older than you… 4 years… how can be a 28th years old annoying guy like me is cute??"
If we look from Nowaki's perspective, Hiroki's embarrassed face looked very cute and somehow aroused him. He smiled gently.
This is so weird… Hiroki thought. Despite what was coming out from his mouth, his heart felt the contradicty. Every time Nowaki say those sweet words, his heart felt like jumping, embarrassed, and strangely happy.
Because of his pride, he would never, ever said something like that though.
Then again, Hiroki remembered where he was, and came back to his first question.
"Where am I?" now become "Where are us??"
Nowaki was about to opened his mouth when Hiroki realized he heard something cracking. The blackness where Nowaki stood was cracking and opened, and Nowaki fell.
Oh God, Nowaki fell.
"Nowaki, NO!!" Fortunately Hiroki caught Nowaki's hand on time on time just before he fall to even deepest slumber. Shocked Nowaki was hanging unto Hiroki's hand while Hiroki took a peek to see what the world behind the darkness, just only to see something like a blazing fire that ready to burn anything.
He gulped. And Nowaki was about to fall to this hell?!
"No… Nowaki, just hang on!!"
Please. Everything happened to me is okay, but not for Nowaki. Please!!
He keep thinking like that while still holding Nowaki's hand. Nowaki was hanging between life and death. Slowly Nowaki recovered from his shock from what was happened to him. Instead he surprised to see his beloved Hiro-san's face.
"Hiro-san…"
Nowaki could see those wrinkles on Hiroki's face. That worried face. A look you will never see at Hiroki's face, except something that was important for him is in danger. Nowaki could not believe his eyes to seeing Hiroki looked so desperate and worried.
Unfortunately for Hiroki, even thought he is older than Nowaki, but Nowaki's height and weight is too much handle for him. His hand started to sweat, and he could not pull Nowaki, afraid when he did, Nowaki's hand would slipped because of his wet hand and fell instead. He became more and more afraid now. Maybe he did not know that he looked nearly cried right now.
Please… please…. God, save Nowaki…
Nowaki's expression changed instantly. With a gentle, lovingly, yet saddened face, he faced his Hiroki.
"Hiro-san…"
"Don't talk now!! I'm trying to help you!!" Hiroki shouted desperately.
"I love you."
Nowaki would got a punch if he was not in this situation, he knew that when he saw Hiroki's angry and annoyed face.
"IDIOT!! Now's not the time!!"
"It's okay…"
"IT WON'T BE OKAY IF YOU FALL, NOW SHUT UP BRAT" Hiroki yelled angrily at him.
"It will be okay… Hiro-san I love you."
"NOWAKI, brat, could you shut up already!?!?"
"You won't be able to pull me, just release me already."
Hiroki could not believe his ears.
"DON'T BE STUPID ASSHOLE, DO YOU THINK I—"
Do you think I would do something like that…
"But if you keep my hand, at this state, you will fall too…"
"IT DOESN'T MATTER FOR ME!!" Hiroki yelled angrily and desperately.
"DON'T SAY SUCH BAD THINGS"
"Well it does a matter for me…" Nowaki smiled. "I don't want you to fall too."
"WHY THE HELL YOU SAID SOMETHING LIKE THIS, AT TIME LIKE THIS!?!?"
"Because I love you. I love you. I love you so much."
"IDIOT!! Shut up, SHUT UP!!"
I would be nothing without you. Please… please…
"Please release my hand Hiro-san."
"AS IF I WOULD DO!!"
Nowaki felt something wet on his cheek. While hanging and holding unto Hiroki's hand, he faced his love, to only see Hiroki's crying face once again. You could say Nowaki was shocked.
Hiroki was crying.
This damn bastard frickin moron idiot brat…
How many times he need to shatter all my prides into dust??
Surprised, Nowaki could only mumbled, "Hiro-san…"
"You, big, idiot brat…" Hiroki could not stop his tears.
"Don't you dare leave me alone…"
"I…"
I love you too!! I'm so freaking in love with you!! Couldn't you see that?? So much… So much…
Nowaki's expression was softened once again. No matter what happened, he will fall. It's only matter on time. Hiroki already knew it. He knew it, yet he tried to lying to himself with frustration.
"I'm sorry Hiro-san, in the end, I can't make you smile… even though I promised I would never make you cry…"
"DON"T SAY END!!" Hiroki was crying more than he had thought he would be. He tried to stop, he did not want to look like a crybaby weak person, especially in front of Nowaki, the one who supposed to be cry in this situation. He sobbed again, could not believe how weak actually he was. "Bastard… then keep your promise!!"
As warm tears fell to Nowaki's saddened worried face, the grip was tightening as well. But still Nowaki's hand keep slipped slowly.
It's only matter on time…
Hiroki refused to believe that. He absolutely, certainly refuse to believe that.
Are there any limits to the emotion called "love"? Hiroki suddenly recalled his thought when he was crying too in Nowaki's arms, at the library.
Hurting others… and even get hurt yourself…
"Nowa… Nowakii…" He sobbed.
Rather than succumbing to hatred, it's better yet to… leave a scar much like a burn mark.
"Hiro-san…" Nowaki couldn't take it anymore. To see someone who is so precious for him, crying desperately because of himself. Then Nowaki decided it.
That way, you'll never be able to forget me. Go live merciless of the strength to tear yourself away from me.
Nowaki, did something that was not expected by Hiroki. Because, the next time he faced Nowaki, he would see Nowaki's last smile. A farewell smile.
Loving someone so much… just so much…
"Hiro-san, I love you. I'm sorry."
To Hiroki's surprise, Nowaki pinched Hiroki's hand that holding his right hand with his left hand, made the older man yelped and release his grip accidentally, release his love instantly.
"Good bye."
Never again will I ever experience this kind of love.
Hiroki felt his heart stop beating while anger, desperate, and frustration came to his head. He desperately tried to reach Nowaki's hand once again, but everything was too late.
Nowaki fell down to the hell he never seen before.
Hiro-san, I miss you, I miss you, I miss you. I love you, I miss you. Kusama Nowaki.
Hiroki could have sworn he saw Nowaki was smiling to him, even thought he was falling down. Unreachable smile…
Hiroki could not believe this. He could only watch Nowaki while he could only crying more and more louder.
I love you. I love you. I love you so much.
Then he screamed like he was not be able to live anymore.
"NOWAKIIIII!!!!!!!"
THUD.
Then he hit the floor hard.
"OUCH!! DAMN!! It hurts!!" Hiroki shouted.
"Hiro-san??"
That was a warm, lovingly voice. He looked up. And there's Nowaki beside him.
"Nowaki!!!" Hiroki hugged Nowaki instantly make the younger man surprised and confused.
"You moron!!!"
"Hi-Hiro-san?? What's wrong? What happened??" Nowaki asked confusedly.
"Huh?" Hiroki blinked and released his grip. He saw where he was and analyzed it carefully. He was in his bedroom. There was the window. There was the gift from Nowaki when he came back from America. There was he sitting in floor stupidly beside his bed, and there was Nowaki stare at him with a worried and surprised face.
Wait a second. Floor??
Then realization hit him hard. Everything was just a stupid dream. That stupid nightmare made him fell from his bed to floor because of his overreaction while he was still sleeping. Then Hiroki cursed himself for being so stupid and embarrassing. He had his pride shattered… by his own nightmare?! His own stupid dream?! What the hell??
Damn it!! Why did not I think about it?! There's no way there's a place that nothing can see and only have black within. Oh well, anything can happening in his dream.
"Hiro-san??" Nowaki asked again, still confused with Hiroki's reaction.
Another realization hit Hiroki again when he heard Nowaki's voice. This time along with embarrassment. He slowly remembered what just he had done after fell from floor.
He cursed Nowaki, but that's not the point.
He hugged him.
He hugged him.
He hugged Nowaki.
BLUSH
I HUGGED NOWAKI. Oh God!! And it was over a nightmare. That was so embarrassing!!
"Hiro-san are you okay?" Nowaki leaned still with a worried face, to his surprise only to see Hiroki's flushed red face.
Damn!! This is so embarrassing!! I could die anytime!!!
"I… I'm FINE!! Ahahaha… it's just a stupid nightmare I had… hahaha!! Le-let's go back to bed…!!" Hiroki cursed himself, for his voice heard so shaking and embarrassingly. Oh God, damn it…
Nowaki still looked worried at him, made the older is the one who confused now. "Wh… what?"
"But you're crying."
They remained silent for five seconds. Stupidly Hiroki asked, "Come again?"
"You're crying." Then Nowaki wiped his tears, then showed Hiroki his wet hand. Hiroki still stared at it confusedly. I'm crying?? Those are my tears? I'm crying this much?
"You're crying so much, and I could have sworn I heard you screamed my name just before you fell to the floor." Nowaki looked at Hiroki's face without hesitation.
Hiroki let everything came to his head, until a click popped in his head and he got everything alright. After another big, embarrassing realization hit his head once again…
OH. MY. GOD.
Hiroki's face is no longer red. It's black, if there's any color to describe how much embarrassed was he at that time. And it's all because of that stupid nightmare!!
"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHH!!!!!!!!"
Hiroki then started to screamed crazily and throw all pillows and everything near him to all directions, make Nowaki more confused and worried.
"Hi-Hiro-san, calm down!!!"
"HOW COULD I!! THIS IS SO EMBARASSING!!"
"But, Hiro-"
"SHUT UP!! DON'T LOOK AT ME!!! YOU MORON!!"
"Hiro-sa-"
"YEAH!! I'm completely an idiot!!! This is not an adult is supposed to be!! So embarrassing!!! So stupid!! How could I cried over you because of my own dream?! This is so embarrassing!! I'm so PATHETIC!!"
"Cried over me?" Nowaki now get a click in his head. Hiroki then realized what just he said.
This is the worst…
"Were you," Nowaki gave Hiroki a warm, gently, lovingly, yet so seductive smile. "Dreaming of me, Hiro-san?"
Nowaki really can't help but to think his Hiro-san is so cute and adorable, to see him getting eager and embarrassed and flustered even cried… and everything was because of a dream of Kusama Nowaki? Nowaki looked at Hiroki's oh very very cute embarrassed face. Hiroki couldn't run anywhere anymore. Nowaki had known everything.
Damn, seeing Hiroki like this, made his composure slipped and want him right there.
"You are so cute, Hiro-san."
"SHUT UP!!! Don't make fun of me—Mmmph!!" Hiroki could not finished his sentence as a hungry mouth crushed against his with passion.
"Mmmh… mmphh… Nowaa—ahh… ahn…"
Nowaki gave Hiroki's lip one last lick before he smirked to Hiroki. "I'm so happy." Then he began to unbutton Hiroki's shirt.
"I… idiot!! What are you doing!!" Hiroki shouted, panicked, and flustered furiously. "A… anyway… anyone who saw that dumb nightmare would have felt the same wa--- aahh!! Ahh…" His unfinished sentence is replaced by a soft moan, as Nowaki kissed his collarbone and started licking Hiroki's nipple.
"It won't feel the same way…" Nowaki replied him while he sucked on his nipple and his other hand was teasing the other, Nowaki rewarded beautiful moans by Hiroki.
"Nnn… yaa… yaah… stop it--hnn!!" Hiroki could not talk coherently and he hated it.
"To see how much important I am for my beloved… I really so, so happy that I could die right now…" Nowaki kissed him again softly, and then smiled warmly, looked at Hiroki's adorable aroused face.
"Mmmh… nnn… i-idiot… hah…"
Nowaki chuckled, then kissed Hiroki's hand.
"I love you."
This person…
Then Nowaki continued to Hiroki's pants, slowly opened it, and rubbed it.
"Aah…Aahhh!! Yaah… nnnowa… ahh!!" Hiroki jerked, made the younger turned on even more.
No matter what happened, my pride will never stand strong in front of his sight.
"Nowa… Nowakiii… I can't…" Hiroki pleaded. "B-bed…"
Nowaki grinned, then lifted Hiroki easily from the floor to the bed. Then slowly he opened his own shirt too, then caged Hiroki in bed with his two hands. He smiled lovingly at Hiroki's pleading face, then kissed him gently yet so passionetly. Before he continued his exploration on Hiroki's body, he said those words again.
"I love you."
And the weirdest thing is, I don't care, as long as I have him. As long I can be with him…
"Nowaki… i-idiot…I…"
If it's you, I don't care… Just love me more! Destroy all my pride to shambles, and allow me to savor the taste of that pleasure.
Nowaki just smiled, and Hiroki embarrassingly tried to give up to his pride again…
"I…"
I love you. I love you. I love you so much.
"I love you too…"
Hiroki turned his face, too embarrassed to even look at his love's face, while Nowaki, too surprised to hear such a beautiful confession from his beloved.
What if… what if you were to be the most important one to the person you love… just… how happy would you be?
"Hiro-san…!"
Then Nowaki instantly hugged Hiroki hard because of the happiness.
"Whoa!! Nowaki, baka!!"
I would be nothing without you. It really can't be helped.
End.
Fiuuuh!! That was hard!! This is my very first fan fic, so tell me where the wrongs… My English is bad too, sorry… T,T.
So, was it good or bad?? I accept critics, so if please review!! Also, I'm gonna make or not gonna make any fan fics it's all depend of how many reviews I get, so please everyone?? Thank you!!
~Junjou-is-pureheart
