Death ends a life, not a relationship.
Jack Lemmon
It was the middle of October and the colourful leaves crunched under footsteps. The neverending sky was filled with black clouds which swore to unleash a powerful storm .
Gabriel adjusted his black woolen hat. His boyfriend gave it to him for his birthday a few weeks ago. It was a little too warm outside for woolen hats and scarves and mittens, but it was a cold day and Sam did sound more bitter than usually while they were talking on the phone yesterday, so by wearing Sam's hat, he thought he would cheer his friend up. Gabriel hurried through the empty park hoping his boyfriend wasn't too angry about the fact that he was quite late. It's a good thing Sam lived near the park.
Gabriel went inside the building and gathering all his remaining strength ran up the stairs. Two steps at a time. He was out of breath when he reached the sixth floor.
*knock, knock*
Gabriel took the phone out of his pocket and evaluated himself in the reflection of the screen. He took off his hat and ran his hand through auburn hair.
*knock, knock*
Where is he? He unbuttoned his coat and casually looked around the narrow stairway. This place had seen many farewell kisses. Why didn't he open the door? Hesitating for a brief moment he took out aspare key, opened the door and went inside the apartment. Sam? Where are you? You told me to come over, remember? No answer. Are you alright? Gabriel went into the bedroom. He had been at this place at least three times now. It was a small apartment in the middle of the city. He opened the door that lead to the bedroom and the view, that revealedto his eyes, was the scariest thing he had ever saw. Sam was laying in bed, eyes barely open, a restful smile set still on his pale lips. It looked as if he was asleep. A small pill bottle was standing on the nightstand. Gabriel warily picked it up. Empty. His legs suddenly felt like paper. He clumsily sat on the ground and looked at his boyfriend. Gabriel knew this would happen sooner or later, but he never imagined it would actually happen sooner. Sam often expressed his thoughts about death and the fact that an overdose seemed the best way to meet the famous skeleton with a scythe. Of course, Gabriel tried to talk some sense into the man, but he always was the stubborn one. He never listened.
There was a small envelope with Gabriel's name on the front next to the empty bottle. Gabriel slowly opened it and started to read
My dearly beloved Gabriel,
I bet you were the one to find me. I'm sorry you had to see me like this ,but you have to understand that life was getting too unbearable for me. Before I met you my life was far worse and I know that doing this(there was a smudge on the paper. A tear probably) was very selfish of me, but last year when Dean (another tear) you know...passed away something broke in me. I understood that now absolutely all of my family has died and although I had you, now don't get all pouty, you would never be enough to fill that empty void in my soul. Besides I would probably just mess your life up. Like I always do. So goodbye, Gabe. I will always watch over you. I'll be your guardian angel. Promise.
Love, Sam
Gabriel looked at the letter unable to understand what to do with it. He sighed and put the letter in his pocket. Behind the window wind was howling like crazy and it was raining hard. Gabriel looked at Sam. So peaceful and seemingly relaxed. his fingers ached from the need to touch his skin, pull back strands of hair that have fallen in his big, brown eyes. But he couldn't do any of those things. He knew Sam had made his decision and mourning over his death would be useless right now. Besides the tears were hiding somewhere deep and didn't want to come outside.
Gabriel took his phone out and slowly dialled told the medics what had happened. They said that a brigade has been sent and he has to stay put. As if.
He stood up and walked over to Sam's bed. Gabriel kissed him on his cool forehead and left softly without looking back.
Gabriel was wandering around aimlessly for the past six hours. The day had turned into a night. Rain was beating on his face. Gabriel didn't even wince. He didn't know where to go. Nothing held him in this life anymore. What was there to do when your boyfriend had died? Gabriel crossed one of the countless streets tonight. There were no cars on this one so he didn't even bother looking up to the traffic light. He wouldn't really care if he got hit anyway.
A car appeared. It moved quickly towards a short man in a dark coat with a black hat.
The driver was honking the horn violently, yet the short man seemed to ignore the loud sound.
The ground was too slippery. No use of hitting the breaks now.
