An Idiot in the Akatsuki

Once upon a rip in the space-time continuum, a naïve and sanity-in-question (should fit right in…) dude in his early 20's was teleported into the Naru-verse with 2 pistols with infinite ammo. Yeah, it'd be best just to picture dual Desert Eagles from Left 4 Dead. And, unfortunately for the good guys in the Naru-verse, our guy is teleported into a village in the middle of an Akatsuki raid type of thing for supplies. So the guy- let's just call him Dylan Cole, or DC for short, the first name that popped into my head, is flat on the ground, feeling like Lindsay Lohan on a Sunday morning, when suddenly a random thug, who realizes he should loot what he can before escaping the madness, tries to mug DC. BANG! And what have we learned if nothin' else children? Homie don't play that! So Deidara, the blonde metrosexual pyromaniac, saw this and he instantly adored the idea of miniature hand cannons, goes over to recruit DC. And luckily for both of them, this is the English dubbed version, though not the Disney XD version *shudders*.

"Well hellooo new friend!" said Deidara, "Me and a few of my *ahem* associates could use a man of your….talents" ;)

"Whoa! Listen buddy, I don't know if I'm givin' off signals or somethin', but I don't swing that way!"

Puzzled, Deidara explained, "No no! I meant you should join our organization of rogue ninjas."

"Oh. Well why didn't you just say that! I love ninjas! Except the ones that try to kill me, but that doesn't happen too often when I'm sober. What does your organization do? Take on various jobs for fitting prices, such as being a bodyguard, assassinations, stealing or forging important documents, or spying?"

"Oh my no, we kidnap people with powerful demons inside them one by one so we can take over the world." Said Deidara, who was now seeming more sinister, growing a fake evil mustache and twirling it around his finger accordingly.

"Well…I don't know….what kinds of benefits are there?"

"You mean besides ruling the world?

"Yeah."

"Well….erm...what would you think we have?"

"OH! A hot tub with bikini chicks, a root beer dispenser in every room, a company monster truck, free wi-fi, a soundproof room for guitar/drums/excessive cussing, and Mr. Miyagi as my personal karate instructor!" :3 he finished breathlessly

"Oh that's all? Of course we have all that!" ^_^ Deidara falsely assured our….um…protagonist?

"Then when do I start?" DC said eagerly.

"How about next week? You can stay in my apartment with Tobi while I'm busy setting up some completely unrelated renovations to our hideout- er I mean headquarters."

To be continued….