A/N this is my first Ncis fic so please bare with me!! let me know what you think and can be changed or corrected... critics welcome but please be nice

Tony For Tim!!

Every Time We Touch

Chapter 1 – What Hurts The Most

Just another day in the office. Just another day of heartache and pretence. Flashing a smile which had grown to be my façade over the years. I walked into the over sized office that was shared by several NCIS teams – all hard at work searching for today's bad boy. Just another day in the office.

"You're late Tony." I stared at the owner of the voice that owned my heart – who of course had no idea, and they called the boy smart.

"No McGeek you are just here early as always, would it kill you to have a lie in once in a while?" I hated being mean to him, not that this was exactly bullying in the office, but I could be nicer but the sudden change in attitude would lead to suspicion on my part, and that would be just what I need. McGee of all people finding out my dirty little secret.

"I do have lie ins, just not on work days." I rolled my eyes to his answer as I sat behind my desk which was practically like my second home, having probably spent more times camped out on the floor under my desk then in my own bed.

"Well not every one can have such an enthusiastic work ethic like yours can we probie?" Spinning around on the black leather swivel chair, I took a closer look at my colleague. "You look different."

"What no I don't." He said and turned quickly pretending there was something fascinating in the cupboard behind him.

"McGee are you wearing concealer?" I asked, a small smile spread across my lips. I couldn't help winding him up, he looked so damn cute when he was flustered and annoyed.

"Look its not my fault, I got into a fight last night and couldn't come into work with a black eye now could I?" My heart ached at the thought of him in pain, but I couldn't let him know that so instead of being a comforting friend I laughed.

"Who did you get into a fight with? Didn't know you could get bruised in cyber space Elf Lord." Now that was just mean, I saw the hurt reflected in his eyes making me feel like a fucking jerk.

"Why are you so mean to me Tony? Is it beyond your capability to be nice to people?" He said, almost raising his voice. I knew I had hurt him, he never raised his voice at any one. Especially me.

"I'm sorry, I was just kidding." It hit me that that was probably the first time the words I'm sorry had ever slipped out of my mouth, even though I fully meant them it felt weird.

"Well some times what's funny to you hurts other people Tony." Tim mumbled, making me feel even worse.

"I know I'm sorry," I said again, getting closer to him. "Who gave you the cover up?" I asked trying to change the subject a little.

"My sister, is it that obvious?" Only because I stare at his perfect face day after day, if I didn't know every inch of his freckled face I doubt I would have noticed.

"Only because I'm the master of covering bruises from punch ups, you didn't rub it in properly." I smiled and walked over to Ziva's desk, pulling out a compact mirror and handing it to him. "The key is to rub it on the whole of your face, so you don't look like you have a patch on your eye."

"Thanks Tony." He smiled at me briefly before rubbing in the concealer.

"No worries probie," I flashed a cocky smile in his direction before retreating back to my own desk.

Sitting down, I pulled out some reports that needed to be completed, it was easier to do it when Gibbs wasn't around breathing down my neck, and when Tim was around I tried solely to concentrate on the work at hand, instead of letting my mind wonder to what I'd prefer to be doing with him. I knew I couldn't keep my thoughts trapped inside forever, some way or another I had to tell Tim, not because there was any sort of chance that he might like me back – because as far as I knew he was straight, despite how many jokes I made. I needed to tell him if not for anything but so I could try to move on. Though the amount my heart bled for the boy, moving on was sure to be the hardest task I'd ever have to face.

All I needed was some sort of sign. And then maybe, I would tell him. Maybe.

"Where's Gibbs?" The voice of Jenny Shepard knocked me out of my thoughts, and I was forced to meet the eyes of our red headed director.

"Not here yet." Tim answered respectfully.

"We've got a case." It was odd that she had said 'we've' as she wasn't exactly a member of the team, she was the boss the one in charge but not one of the team.

"What is it?" Tim asked quickly.

"Dead Navy command officer found dead in the toilets of a bar in Norfolk." She replied, and handed me a sheet of paper with all the information on, including the name of the officer – Michael Parkman, and the bar name – The Kiwi Bar. "You two go check it out, Ducky is already on his way to collect the body."

"What about Gibbs and Ziva?" I asked not wanting to disobey direct orders from the director but then again not wanting to do something with out Gibbs he was after all the senior agent.

"When they arrive I shall tell them to join you on the case," She answered. "Any questions?"

"No Ma'am." Me and Tim said in unison, we both looked at each other and I couldn't help but smile as our eyes met.

"Lets go probie, I'm driving."

00

"So how did you get the black eye?" I asked as we pulled into a parking spot just outside of the Kiwi Bar. He looked awkward and shrugged of the question by looking at the sheet of paper.

"Says here that the commander was found dead in the toilet cubicle." We already knew this piece of information, as we were discussing the possibilities in the car. We walked into the bar in a comforting silence, though just being next to him was awkward.

"You must be the cavalry." A tall man, with jet black hair wearing the standard cop uniform said.

"Yeah, agent Timothy McGee, and Tony DiNozzo." Tom said, I loved it when he took charge.

"You ME is inside." The cop said pointing the way towards the bathroom of the bar. The Kiwi Bar was a well known club for Navy officers, a popular place for young officers who were looking for a night away from it all. "Considering his Navy I think its safe to say I can let you take over." The cop said, "The owner of the bar is in his office, and the witness who found him left his details and then had to go back to the Navy."

"Okay thanks." Tim said before we walked into the bathroom. "What we got Ducky?"

"No Gibbs?"

"Nope, no Ziva either. I wonder what them two could be up to." I said smirking to Tim who laughed a little before staring at the body and started to take photos.

"I doubt what ever Gibbs is doing he will be doing with Ziva, our Gibbs has a preference for redheads," Ducky said as he continued to analyse the body.

"You never know." Tim said as he continued to take snap shots of the dead officer.

"I'm going to talk to the owner." I said after realising how close I was getting to McGee, the toilet cubicle wasn't big enough for three men and one dead body.

Sighing to myself I walked to the green wooden door at the back of the bar, not bothering to knock I walked straight through, the owner was young looking, dirty blond hair cut short into a spiked design.

"I'm Agent DiNozzo, I need to ask you a few questions." I said trying to push the thoughts of being up close and personal with Tim out of my mind. "What's your name?"

"Mark Harle." He replied. "I can't believe something like this has happened, a Navy officer murdered in my bar, nothing like this has ever happened before security is usually pretty tight."

"Do you remember seeing him with any one?" I asked pen and paper at the ready.

"He came in alone, I never miss a face working in this business you get a good memory for things like that, but he was friendly, very friendly with a lot of the other officers and punters."

"What do you mean by friendly?" I asked though I reckon I didn't need to be told.

"He flirted, it wasn't the first time he had come to the bar either he's a nice bloke spoke to him a few times, always left with a different man."

"Man?" I asked, wondering whether or not this was my sign.

"Yeah, he never spoke to any women unless he was turning them down. Only went to talk with the men, usually succeeding." The manager replied, "Its not uncommon with Navy bars like these."

"Right, did you see him go into the cubicle?"

"No, I was in the back most of the last night, inventory was meant to be today but with everything happening I think I might just go home spend some time with the wife and kids, things like this really make you get a perspective you know."

"Yeah, we might need to contact you again, see if you recognise some faces, so can you leave a number. Once we've taken the body, I don't see why you can't lock up and go home."

"Thanks." He smiled after handing me a card with his house and mobile number on it. I walked back into the cubicle to see that Ducky had already taken the body, and McGee was taken a few more pictures of the cubicle and crime scene.

"Ready to go?" I asked and he nodded, I helped him pack his stuff before walking back to the car.

We arrived back a half an hour later. Gibbs and Ziva still not here. I couldn't help but suspect that something wasn't right. Just as I was about to voice my suspicions Gibbs walked in.

"Boss, where you been?" I asked as he looked for something in his cabinet taking out his gun he looked at me, I have never seen him look so exhausted before.

"Me and Ziva have a case, she's undercover and I'm trailing her, looks like you two are on your own on this one. Think you can handle it?"

"Yes boss." I said and he looked over at Tim who just nodded.

"Do you need any help?" He asked.

"No, what about you, what you got?"

"Nothing we can't handle right McGee?" I asked and he nodded with a reassuring smile. This was another sign, me and McGee working a case on our own.

"Well I've got my cell if you need anything." He said before walking of.

"What do you thinks going on?" Tim asked a little worried.

"Who knows." I sighed. "Any way, lets get to work. Sooner we find out what's going on, sooner we can go for a drink."

"Right." He smiled, before putting the information we had on the commanding officer on the big screen. "He was meant to be shipped out to Iraq tomorrow."

"Been in the navy three years, since he was eighteen." I finished.

"We should find out if he has any enemies in his unit." Tim said.

"I knew that, come on then lets go."

00

The day was long, and at just after eight I walked out of the office with Tim, after finding out nothing particularly useful I realised just how much we needed Gibbs he always knew just what to look for.

"How about that drink?" I asked, this was the night I was going to tell him just how I felt.

"Sure," He smiled and walked towards my car, knowing I wouldn't be seen dead getting in his run down motor.

We went to our usual bar, I ordered the drinks while he found us a table, he was sat in the back as this was the only empty table. It wasn't very romantic for what I had planned but it would have to do.

"So, what do you think we should do with the case tomorrow?" He asked, as usual thinking about work.

"Tim, can we talk about something other than work, my head is killing me." I sighed wondering if my head was killing me because of nerves.

"Sorry bad habit." He laughed and I smiled.

"There's something I want to say any way." I said knowing that if I didn't say it now I wouldn't say it at all.

"What is it?" He asked concerned.

"I'm gay." I said getting it out into the open. He was shocked I could see it in his face.

"What about all the girls you bragged about?" He said raising an eye brow and I wondered if he thought this was all some sort of a joke.

"That's not the point right now Tim, the truth is, I have a thing for you." He was speechless, I wondered how he would reject me. I wasn't expecting him to do what he did. Get up and walk away. Leaving me cold and rejected. Broken and alone.

After downing the beer I walked to my car, driving home so I could cry and be on my own. Knowing that tomorrow was going to be more then just a day at the office. It was going to be the worst day of my life.