Hey this is Hermes 96 this is going to be a one shot fan fic about the repercussions of breack up and how Blaine's be-trail of Kurt's trust drove him in to a dark path from which there is no return. Warning may triger.

disclamer any names of locations in this story that also apear in the tv show glee are not mine i have just used there names to tell this story. please do not copy any of this with out asking my permission through PM or a review.


Kurt sat in the corner of his room in total darkness. Kurt let a tear fall as he stared blankly a picture of him and Blaine, wearing matching onzies. He remembered all the times that they had been alone together images flashed through his mind. Him and Blaine in glee club. Blaine and him taking it in turns to dye each others hair. Looking deep into Blaine's eyes as he ran his hands through Blaine's wet hair whilst Blaine's hands ran over something else. Blaine Sneaking up behind him before his exams and wrapping his hands around his waist whispering that every thing would be okay. then lastly Blaine telling Kurt about the guy he had been with back in lima whist Kurt had been in New York.

Kurt remembered how with every word that came out of Blaine's mouth went through him like a dagger being repeatedly plunged deep into his very soul breaking him in every way.

He remembered how after Blaine had left he had looked him self in his room and picked up his phone turning it over in his hand.

After a few minutes he removed the back off the phone and picked up the small silver blade that had lay there unused for months. He remembered how he had taken it out of one of Finn's sharpeners after a fight with his dad. and unscrewed the blade. After using it he had hidden it in the back of his phone forgetting about the small blade. that was in till now.

Kurt turned the small blade over and over in his hand. He pulled up the sleeve of the hoodie he was wearing and put the cold blade against his skin. The first cut was the most painful but as he continued with the furtherer 12 cuts down his arm he forgot the pain and was surrounded but memory that once had brought him such joy but now only brought indescribable pain. He looked down at the mess that was now his arm. The blood had trickled down and joined other pools creating a river that had now coated his hand.

As the blood rose to the surface of his pale skin he remembered His First kiss with Blaine he remembered the First and every time Blaine had said those three words that every one wants and needs to hear. He remembered how Finn and His dad had gone crazy when he had come home with that small streak of purple in his hair and how he had snapped and dyed his hole head that colour to show them that he could do crazy things too. He remembered the last lingering kiss he had shared with Blaine before leaving for new york how Blaine had been messing around hiding behind a teddy and how he had pulled the teddy down a few inches and kissing Blaine good bye for what might now be the final time.

He stared looking down at his bloody arm and walked into his adjoining bathroom where he picked up a wash cloth and gently bathed his arm. He walked back over to his work bag and took out the dressing and bandaged he always kept in his small first aid kit and went about wrapping up his arm using his teeth to tie the knot after the bandage and dressing were secure. He got up and found one of his old fleeces and pulled it on knowing the bagginess would hide the bandages that lay underneath.

He spent the next day hiding from Rachel, Blaine and Santana . After thinking he had managed to through them off his tale he slipped into a near by bath room removing the bandages from his arm. He had intended to soak of the dressing but a noise out side startled him. He stood by the door as he heard Blaine explain to Rachel and Santana what had happened. Before he knew what he had done Kurt looked down at his hand where he held the dressing having torn it off his arm causing the bleeding to resume. Kurt cursed under his breath as he bundled up the bandages and pulled down his sleeve fixing his arm in place to stem the flow of blood so it wouldn't be obvious to the others waiting to ambush him out side.

Kurt sucked in a deep breath and charged through the door shoving the bandages into a near by bin. He clasped his left hand over his jumper to stem the flow of blood as he hurtled down the stairs to the cafeteria down stairs. Kurt stopped clutching his arm digging his nails in to the sensitive skin he was about to run again when he was stopped by Blaine , Rachel and Santana.

"Look i'm sorry..." The rest of what Blaine had said was blocked out by the tidal wave of emotions that had hit Kurt like a tyre iron to the gut. Kurt's inner daemons rampaged some yelling at him to accept Blaine's apology and the others yelling to run a way now. Kurt pushed all though thoughts down. As much as he knew he should hate Blaine for what he had done there was still a large part of him that loved Blaine unconditionally so Kurt bottled his anger and his love deep within himself and brought out a passive demener which he kept for the rest of the day as Blaine explained what he done and why. The rode the bus back to central Manhattan before going there separate ways after Kurt telling Blaine that he would need a bit of time before they could become any where close to friends again.

So Kurt sat back in the lush comfy chair by the window in his room in his apartment working out what was going to happen next. Kurt looked down at his scars knowing how much pain he had been through but then he saw the picture of him and Blaine that sat across from him on his desk and sighed. He picked up his laptop and replayed to the apology that had popped up over an hour ago and he began to type.


Okay this will be left as a cliff hanger for you to decide what Kurt does please review as iv'e never written a an fic like this before and i would be greatly interested to read what you think about it. thank you for reading

H96