The Nightmare Scenario

Pairing: Sweden/Finland

Genre: Horror with a side of humor

Rating: T

Summary: If Sweden wants to be Finland's husband so bad, he must first go through what all men fear most…


It all started long before it actually started really. There were multiple small moments and incidences that occurred daily that would all lead up to that point. And most of them were his fault. Maybe- Berwald thought- if he hadn't been so excessively protective, so overly-doting even… maybe it would have never happened.

The day, like many days on which life changing even occurred, started out rather normal. He had woken up, as one does to begin the day. He had taken a shower and brushed is teeth, like all other human beings. He reawakened a snoozing Finland to tell him he could now use the shower, as any husband might do for his wife- if their wife was a nation and tended to release an uncontrolled amount of alarm-clock-crushing force down on the snooze button. He got dressed, maybe a bit nicer than the average man but his job was a bit higher up. He was then about to head down and begin to make breakfast in an opportunistic attempt to stay in his wife's good books, as any husband knows best be done to avoid the couch…

That's when it all started going wrong…

He was heading from the closet to the door when he glanced over to Finland whom had just exited the shower and was now looking for something to wear. Only he wasn't at that particular second and Sweden never made a bigger mistake in his life than to stop and ask-

"w's wrong?"

Finland was staring himself down in the mirror, a button-up slightly hidden under the towel 'round his neck. He was also holding two other shirts in his right hand while his left was held up like it was about to be used for something but forgot what... also, unfortunately for Berwald, he was already wearing boxers but that wasn't the point. Finland didn't look up at him, preferring to continue his staring contest with himself.

The room was silent for a while. Sweden assumed finland wasn't going to speak and was about to leave when-

"Berwald?"

Sweden turned towards the other Nordic, whose left hand now rested on the front of his button-up.

And then it happened…

"Does this shirt make me look fat?"

'… Fan…'

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO The End OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

Don't worry Finland, it's a cute kinda fat (what? he IS a little chubby…) I enjoy cheap humor and stereotypes so you are free to clonk me over the head for this fail. I just wanted to write something for Sweden's birthday- although I guess a free ticket to a month of sleeping on the couch is hardly a gift to get excited over… Although I never bothered to take into account that Sweden IS gay and can probably tell him if it really does and what makes him look thin… ahaha, more, crappy stereotype humour…

Fan means… well… fuck… or shit… it's basically just a strong curse word. It was that or 'skit'… Swedish swear words sounds like English objects and activities. I came THIS close to using a Finnish curse word… lord knows wiki has an entire page devoted to them…

I dunno why but I suddenly want souvlaki and rice… and maybe some pita… Stupid taste buds, I'm writing about Sweden, not Greece… that's a nice thought though… yeah, I'mma write a Giripan story next… My stomachs already decided for me…