Skin - Zola Jesus
"I have full cause of weeping, but this heart shall break into a hundred thousand flaws or ere I'll weep." - Shakespeare
Maddy's POV
It was raining. There was just dark grey clouds hanging overhead in the night sky, and not a ray of sunshine in sight, and suddenly the idea of running to school seemed like torture, especially without him.
It had been around two years, and many people had gotten over him, especially people like Jimmie, who only remember him as the outcast who ran away; just another person passing through. Even Shannon and Tom, although not completely the same, had learnt to live on. Yet not me. I was still waking up with a heavy heart and at least once a week, with tear trails on my cheeks. My Mam and Dad had tried to encourage me to move on, but they still say I'm always closed in on myself, and that I confined myself to my bed most of the time. My grades dropped, and suddenly it felt as though there was no point of me being there anymore.
So that morning wasn't much different, to be honest. I woke up in time for school and dragged myself to the bathroom. I showered, changed and went on with my everyday routine as normal, if normal is the right word. As I walked downstairs, Mam was coming up. She frowned a little at me, then her expression turned to something that made her seem upset. I ignored her, just as I did with pretty much everyone in the morning these days. Dad was downstairs cooking breakfast, but I just grabbed a slice of toast, put my shoes on and walked out the door, not even bothering to say goodbye.
I didn't run, but rather I let my clothes get soaked in the rain that battered down onto me. I got a little way down the road before a car pulled up behind me. I turned round to see Mam inside, beckoning me to come in. Even if I had ignored her this morning, I wouldn't turn this down. I opened the door and hopped into the front seat. I glanced towards Mam for a second, which was a mistake, and she smiled at me, but that now made me feel bad.
She didn't say a word before we got to school, which in all honestly was not a long drive away, but it still seemed like a lifetime before she finally said "Have a nice day at school." The classic farewell by mothers everywhere, but then she added something. "Make yourself proud." This was what I pondered over for the rest of day. I met Shannon and Tom at the entrance to the school and greeted them quietly. Then they started having a conversation, including me even though I wasn't talking, just as they had done for two years.
The day passed painfully slowly, but for once, I actually payed attention in lessons, making an effort to achieve slightly higher than my already terrible marks. It didn't matter though, because at lunchtime, I began to feel a strange burning sensation in my chest. It wasn't too overwhelming, but it still hurt. I tried to hide it, but after two failed attempts at not cringing in pain, Shannon and Tom saw there was something wrong.
"Maddy? Are you ok?" Tom asked me. I nodded, but they clearly didn't believe me.
"Maddy what's wrong?" Shannon asked, in that soothing voice she used in the first few weeks after he left to calm me down and comfort me as I cried.
"Nothing, ok? Just leave it!" I told them. But they persisted and when it neared the end of lunch, they forced me to leave.
"Maddy, just go home, ok?" Tom pointed out.
"Yeah, there's clearly something wrong and your Mam is the person to go to!"
"We'll cover for you and all, just text us when you get home."
Finally, I gave up and went home. The rain was still coming down, but not as heavy as before, but enough to still put me off running, and this time I really did make the whole journey on foot, letting the rain soak my damp clothes, but Mam and Dad were there when I got home, waiting. Dad was even standing outside in the rain. They must have caught my scent nearby.
Dad's mouth formed a straight line when he caught sight of me, and then he walked a couple of paces to catch me before I reached the front door. He put his hand in my back and guided me inside. Mam was already there with a box of tissues and a towel. She took me upstairs and told me to take a shower, which I gratefully responded to. When I got out, I got changed into my pyjamas, even though it was only sometime between two thirty and three in the afternoon, and crawled under the covers on my bed, my hair still soaking wet and unbrushed. I quickly texted Shannon and Tom to say I was alright, even though I really wasn't. The burning sensation was still there, and it seemed to get more painful each second. However, I didn't inform my Mam of this, and instead tried to get to sleep. It was hard, especially with the light and pain, but I managed to sleep for a few hours, before I woke up suddenly.
I glanced to the clock on my bedside table and saw that it was 23:47. That's when there was suddenly a bright flash, and a few seconds later, a low rumble that chilled my bones. When I saw asleep, the storm had got worse and worse. However, it was then I realised I'd woken up at a perfect time, almost as if the storm had happened to wake me.
I sat up and pulled the covers off me, before walking over to the chest of drawers. I opened the second from the bottom draw, as quietly as I could since these drawers were awfully creaky, and pulled out the package. I'd bought it and wrapped it around two weeks previous, when I suddenly felt the urge to do it, since I wanted to pick out the perfect gift.
Then I walked back to my bed and sat right at the heart of it, placing the package in front of me. I'd left my curtains open, so I could see the rain pouring down like a waterfall curtain outside. The burning sensation had come back, and this time it was bigger than anything I'd felt before, but I remained as I was, until the time came. When it did change to the time, there was a bright white flash from outside. The two had come together in perfect synchronisation, eerily.
When the thunder came, I whispered into the darkness, but it was as if the sky was trying to drown away everything I said. "Happy Birthday."
It hurts Rhydian, it hurts.
Hey everybody, welcome to my new story, Our Dancing Days! Hope you enjoyed this chapter. I plan on updating when I can, though chances are it will be around the time of the wolfblood episodes (uk).
Thanks, please review! enjoy x
