My second oneshot for the day. Man, I'm seriously bored. Of all days to be a public holiday... Another crappy oneshot done by no one other than the crappiest person on the planet. Enjoy. :D

"C'mon Nic, tell us a story! We're bored."

Priest Nic ruffled down her overall skirt and turned towards Rhonda and Minty, two of her good friends.

"I talk a lot of crap. You sure you wanna hear a story?" she answered with a smile.

"Hey, it beats walking around in the Free Market doing nothing at all."

"Point taken. Any story's okay with you two?"

"Just help us pass time."

"Sure thing. This is the story of bakamono. I'll now tell you how that name came about."


"Eh, Nic, what are you reading?" Keen asked as he hopped onto the ledge Priest Nic was sitting on while watching him train at the Parking Lot.

"Hmm? Oh, just this Japanese language book I picked up in Mushroom Shrine. Can't you see the title?" she answered, still absorbed in the book, which was propped up on an omok table. The book title was in clear view of Keen, yet he had failed to notice it.

"Okay..." he replied, jumping down to kill the mobs that had spawned.

"Hmm, Chapter 9…. Insulting phrases…Let's see…. Ah, here's an easy one. Bakamono is made up of two words. Baka and Mono. Baka is stupid. Mono is thing. Bakamono equals stupid thing. Bakamono Keen, Keen is a stupid thing!"Nic happily announced at her ability to read Japanese.

"I am not stupid!"

"I didn't say you were. I said you were a stupid thing, bakamono."

"No, you're a bakamono."

"Nuh-uh, it's my copyright!"

"Pffft, yeah right."

"Gahhh, bakamono bakamono bakamono!"

"Keep quiet little girl."

"You can't tell me what to do."

"Yes I can. I'm older. Now be quiet."

-A few minutes of silence-



"Bakamono."

"Keep Quiet!"

"Shan't, can't, won't. You can tell me to keep quiet, but you can't glue my mouth shut."

"Why you…"Keen suddenly teleported up behind Nic and she screamed. He was about to whack her when she mounted her hog and rode off, leaving him whacking nothing but air and desperately trying to regain his balance.

"Bakamono, bakamono…" Nic's voice and laughter echoed off the walls of the large deserted Parking Lot.


"Man, that was funny," Rhonda commented.

"Yup, it's even funnier when you were there to witness it in person," Nic replied, beginning to laugh.

"Umm, Nic," Minty began.

"Hahaha... Yeah? Haha…" Nic said, in between fits of giggles.

"Look behind you," came a voice from behind.

She turned her head, only to see a pissed-off Keen standing there, red whip in hand.

"Ahhhhhhhh, bakamono!" She yelled as the mounted her hog and rode off again, giving the mage behind her little time to respond.

"Huh? Wait, come back!" He shouted at her, before teleporting as fast as he could to try and narrow the increasing distance between them.

"She's right," Rhonda commented. "It is a lot funnier when you witness it in person."