Chapter 1

Neptune, Take the Wheel

Location: Pineapple Under the Sea, Interior; June 21

A yellow-sea sponge sits in the living room while reading a newspaper. While doing so, he comments: "Boy, can't believe the BB Times is going under; print companies are disappearing these days"

"Meow" a snail, not a cat, makes a sound which translates to: "How's the coffee?"

"Hold on, Gare Bear" he replies and takes a cup's sip. Satisfied, he sets the cup down and critiques: "I've drank this for 16 years and still don't how you do it, Gare Bear, but that's the best coffee I've ever-"

Suddenly, SpongeBob's arteries ache and he yelps.

"Guess I'm too old for so much caffeine" he comments and chugs a glass of water. "Well, time to punch the clock"

He puts on the Krusty Krab hat and walks into the living room. "But not before checking my Quote-a-Day calendar"

"June 21: Civilization is doomed. Neptune, take the wheel!"

"Wow, that's not encouraging at all" he comments. "Apparently, the motivational and optimistic calendars aren't marketable anymore"

Location: Krusty Krab, Interior; June 21

SpongeBob enters the restaurant and tosses flower petals into the air. He walks over to a grumpy squid: "Happy first day of summer, Squidward! Care to join me for solstice caroling? Walking in the grass, it's so fine, don't need shoes in the summertime!"

Unfortunately, the grumpy yet relatable squid comments: "I'm still not a summer person, SpongeBob. Especially since it's so hot nowadays!"

"Oh, Squidward. If you look past climate change, then it's the most wonderful time of the year!"

A jovial Mr. Krabs exits his office through the door: "Davy Jones on the jib! Do my ears deceive me? Is it really the first day of summer? Is it?"

"Yeah" SpongeBob chuckles

"Whee-hoo!" the cheapskate replies and dashes over to the window.

"Gee, Mr. K., you sure have a scorching case of summer fever! What is it about summertime that makes us so happy? The warm nights, the intoxicating aroma of a charcoal briquette, the hypnotic sound of a lawnmower running over a distracted fish on their phone?"

"THE MONEY!"

"The money?"

"Er, uh…I mean, uh…the children!"

"Oh…."

"You see, boy, during the summer, the children are excused from their classes, a recess commonly referred to as summer break".

Mr. Krabs sits down on a barrel and SpongeBob sits on his lap.

"Tell me more about summer break"

"Well, during this summer break, the children wander Bikini Bottom unsupervised, their pockets lined with allowance. Free to spend their money without any parental guidance whatsoever".

Mr. Krabs pulls down a menu and comments: "I guess that's what I like best"; he puts a sticker labeled '4.99' next to the Kiddie Meal";

"Sure, I suppose some would try and take advantage of this situation by selling them toys or candy, but I sleep well at night with the knowledge that I'm providing them with something they need: a nutritious meal."

Closing Time (almost)

"Almost closing time, Mr. K" SpongeBob walks upto Mr. K, who was standing by the window, excited and now disappointed.

"What? But that's impossible" he then sobs: What about the money? I mean uh... uh... what about the children?"

SpongeBob shrugs as Mr. Krabs sighs: "I guess summer isn't coming this year"

"If you think about it, kids don't eat here as much during recent summers" SpongeBob admits. "Even Krabby the Clown or my pain and misery won't work

"What if…we opened a Krabby Universe!" Mr. Krabs suggests. "Glove World did it. Why can't we?"

"Let's try. But the playgrounds are also suffering; kids stay inside and parents' are paranoid about leaving them without guidance" Squidward suggests from the register boat.

SpongeBob comments. "Just wish they read our ads in the kids section of the newspaper"

"You doofus!" Squidward yells. "Bottomites don't read the paper anymore. If you wanna advertise to them, you do so online!"

"Online?" Mr. Krabs asks. "But, we don't have any computers to post online"

"That's from your stupidity" Squidward comments.

"No worries. I'll visit the cyber café" Mr. Krabs outlines a plan. "Problem is I've never used a computer in me life"

"We also don't have much computer experience, Mr. K" SpongeBob admits. "Maybe ask Pearl to help"

"Spending time with family: It's the teenage dream" the krab satirically comments. "It's a plan!"

He heads towards the exit and so does the Krusty Krew.

"Spending time with family was your teenage dream?" a confused Squidward asks: "What about having good times at Make-Out Reef?"

"I spent me adolescence in the war; it got lonely"

"Fair enough" Squidward agrees and then asks. "So, if this fails. Can we get tomorrow off?"

"No, Mr. Squidward" Mr. Krabs replies.

Squidward sighs in yet more disappointment:

"Oof. It was worth a try"

To be continued