Walking The Twisted Line
Disclaimer: I do not own CSI: Miami. Just borrowing…blah, blah, blah…you get the picture. So don't sue.
A/N: This is only the second fanfic I've written (first slash ever), but the first one to be published online. Ironic, isn't it? But the crazy plot bunny bit me so freakin' hard today and won't let me go until I finally sat down and started typing.
Beta-ed by: Yours Truly! (All mistakes are mine.)
Mild spoilers for S4 Episode: Driven and S3 Episode: Lost Son. (I only saw Lost Son once, so I am going by what I remember from the episode and making up the rest of the details of the funeral as accurately as I can.) Pardon any errors or inaccuracies. After all, this is just a fanfic.
Summary: Eric confronts Ryan about freezing during the shootout and learns an unexpected secret about Ryan's relationship with his dead best friend (Speed). Eric/Ryan Mild SLASH! Don't like it, don't read it!
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Chapter 1 – A Picture Is Worth…
Eric Delko just completed the paperwork for the car-jacking case they were working on that day and was anxious to go home and get some much-needed sleep. Today had been an emotional roller coaster of a day for him. File in hand, he made his way through the halls of the Miami Dade Crime Lab to hand Horatio the finished report before heading out.
Horatio.
Ah, yes…Marisol's red knight in shining armor. The one who would brandish a sword…no, wait…a gun, and who would immediately come to his sister's rescue in his modern-day gray stallion of a Hummer. Come to think of it, his badge does resemble a sort of a shield, and…
He shook his head at the mental image it brought about in his head. He really did not need to think about Horatio in that kind of a costume.
He figured he'd call Marisol once he got home just to check how she was holding up and to see if she needed anything. He knew she would be safe in Horatio's place, and that the older man would take care of and would protect her. And even though he was a little wary of her budding relationship with his boss, he knew that he could trust Horatio with her life.
As he rounded a corner, he saw Dan Cooper walking out of the A/V Lab.
"Hey, Delko. You heading out?"
"Yeah…soon as I hand H this report," he replied, holding up the manila folder. "I heard you did some field work today."
"Yeah," Dan acknowledged with a smirk. "That was cool. Although I wouldn't say the same thing about Wolfe."
Frowning in confusion, Eric stopped to ask, "What?"
"You mean, you didn't hear?" Dan asked, returning a confused frown.
"Hear what?" Eric asked a bit testily.
"Chill, man. It was nothing," Dan replied casually. "I heard that Wolfe froze during the raid today, and boss man saved his ass. I was just teasing him about it a few hours ago, but he took it a little too personally and got pretty defensive, if you ask me. Nearly bit my head off."
Eric felt his blood pressure begin to rise and his heart begin to pound nervously in his chest. And he couldn't tell whether it was because of what could've happened to Ryan, or if it was because of Dan's nonchalant attitude about the whole incident. Maybe it was both.
Trying to stay calm, he managed to ask, "Did he say why he froze?"
"No, man," Dan replied. "He denied it actually…said he didn't have a clean shot, and that was that."
"Where is he now?"
Shrugging, Dan replied, "I don't know. But I thought I saw him heading towards the locker room."
Before Dan could say anything more, Eric whirled around in a fury and marched towards the locker room. He couldn't explain the nervous feeling he kept having or the rush of worry that suddenly overtook him. But he was pretty sure it might have had something to do with the team having experienced the heartache of losing one of their own…well, partly anyway.
It was bad enough to lose someone so close to him to a gunshot, but to have the same thing almost happen today? Especially within the span of two short years…
Shaking off the persistent flood of thoughts, Eric strode towards the locker room, shoving the doors open with force as he called out, "Wolfe!" Hearing no answer, he stalked towards the aisle where Ryan's locker was. "Wolfe!" he called again, but he found the room to be deserted.
Seething in frustration, he looked down and saw that he was still holding the manila folder in his hand.
"Horatio." he thought. "Right…I'll go talk to H."
Taking some deep, calming breaths, Eric made his way back through the lab and headed towards Horatio's office. He saw the red head sitting at his desk looking over some paperwork, and he knocked on the door.
Horatio looked up, "Come in, Eric."
Stepping in, Eric announced, "H, I've completed the report for today's car-jacking case."
"Thank you, Eric. Just leave it here, and I'll have a look at it in a minute," Horatio replied without looking at him.
Eric placed the folder on his desk, but instead of leaving, he just stood there, not knowing how to broach the subject with his boss.
Horatio noticed, and without looking up, he asked, "Is there something else that I can do for you, Eric?"
Uncertainly, Eric called him, "H?"
This time, the red head did look up and met his employee's concerned eyes, "What is it, Eric?"
"What happened today?"
Frowning slightly at the ambiguous question, Horatio replied, "If you're concerned about Marisol, she's – "
"No," Eric cut him off. "Not Marisol."
Now Horatio raised his eyebrows at him in question.
"Wolfe," Eric clarified. "What happened to him? During the raid?"
"Eric…" Horatio began slowly as he stood up, "I don't think I am at liberty to discuss that with you."
"H…" Eric turned a pleading look at his boss, "Please…I just want…" he stopped and composed himself before proceeding again, "I just…need to know what really happened. Please."
Horatio studied the Cuban Russian for a moment, trying to figure out why in the world this was so important to him, as well as trying to gauge how much he should reveal about his youngest CSI.
Looking him straight in the eye, Horatio asked in a gentler tone, "What is this really about, Eric?"
Sighing, Eric bowed his head and turned away, not answering Horatio's question as he slowly trudged over towards one of the bookshelves inside the office. He stopped in front of the one that had four picture frames on one of the shelves. Mindlessly, he began to study each of the pictures.
The first frame on the far left held a picture of a younger-looking Horatio, his brother Raymond, Yelina, and a very young Ray Jr. during a family barbecue several years ago.
The second frame held a group picture of the original team. It was taken about three years ago in front of a local bar in celebration of cracking a tough case that had taken them over a month to solve: Horatio was on the far left standing next to Calleigh, who had that southern belle-ish kind of a smile on her face. In the middle was a grinning Alexx, who had a motherly arm wrapped around a laughing Speed. And right beside Speed was Eric, smiling happily, beer in hand.
A faint smile graced Eric's mouth, along with a slight pang of pain and loss. His gaze lingered just a little bit longer at the old picture as he thought about his dead best friend. God! How he missed him!
Aimlessly, he moved to look at the third frame containing the current CSI team. It was taken not too long after Ryan Wolfe started as a CSI. The picture was taken in front of an Italian Restaurant in downtown Miami and was in stark contrast to the previous one.
Eric stood on the far-left side, not bothering to smile at the camera. Next to him stood Alexx, who wore a tight smile on her face, then Calleigh, who did manage to wear a convincing smile. An uneasy Ryan stood next to Calleigh, a thin, forced smile that didn't reach his eyes was splayed on his face, and next to him was Horatio, who had lain an assuring hand on Ryan's shoulder.
He remembered Horatio taking the team out for dinner and drinks that night in an effort to 'bring Ryan into the fold.' And he remembered how awkward that night was for everybody, especially for Ryan, who could tell that his presence wasn't really a welcome one.
A pang of guilt shot through Eric as he recalled that night. He had to admire Horatio for making a concerted effort to make Ryan feel like he was part of the close-knit team. Calleigh had tried to extend her southern hospitality by making small talk. Alexx was still a bit cold towards the new kid, albeit the ice was slowly starting to chip away, and he… Well, he was too busy nursing his own beer, too busy seeing Ryan as a replacement, too busy thinking about not betraying Speed that he couldn't bring himself to talk to the new kid.
Horatio watched Eric intently as the young man silently studied the pictures. Soon, Eric's eyes fell on the last frame. It was a picture of Speed's funeral at the cemetery. Picking it up, Eric studied the photograph with care, remembering that fateful day when he had to suddenly say good-bye to his best friend forever.
In his mind, he could hear the sound of bagpipes playing 'Taps' as the Honor Guard raised their rifles in salute and prepared to fire. At the bottom center of the photo was his best friend's casket with the American flag draped ceremoniously over it, and a few feet behind it was a line of patrol officers in full Honor Guard uniform, saluting the fallen cop.
Unconsciously, Eric lifted the frame, studying the faces of each one of the officers on the Honor Guard lineup. When his eyes fell on the fourth person, he squinted his eyes and brought the photo closer to his face, trying to make sure that his eyes weren't deceiving him.
"Eric?" he heard Horatio call him, but he was too stupefied about what he was looking at to acknowledge his boss. "Eric?" he heard the red head call him again.
This time, Eric whirled around, his eyes wide with stunned realization and bewilderment as he faced Horatio, who, by now, had a faint smile of acknowledgement on his face.
"H…" Eric began, but his breath caught in his throat, unable to verbalize what he wanted to say. He swallowed audibly.
Horatio didn't reply, merely nodded in affirmation as an answer to Eric's unverbalized question. He knew what the young man was going to ask, and he knew that one day, he would eventually find out about this and that Ryan's secret would finally be revealed.
"Does this mean…?" Eric trailed off, not able to complete his conclusion.
"Yes, it does, Eric," Horatio replied matter-of-factly. "And it means a lot more than what that photograph is telling you."
Eric's head started to spin slightly at his boss's revelation. How could he not tell the team about this? How could he not tell him, of all people? Speed was his best friend for crying out loud!
"You knew?" he asked in breathless incredulity, still clutching the frame.
"I did," Horatio admitted simply.
"Why didn't you – ?" Eric began to ask, only to be cut off by Horatio's reply.
"It wasn't my secret to tell, Eric," Horatio replied calmly. "If Speed wanted you to know, he would've told you. And besides, Ryan specifically asked me not to tell anyone, and I respect his reasons and his decision to keep this under the table."
"But…why, H?" Eric asked, confused. "I don't understand why he doesn't want anyone to know."
"I could tell you the answer to that question, Eric," Horatio began, "But then again, it's not my place to tell."
"H, please…" Eric began to plead again, but Horatio would not budge.
Shaking his head as he looked at his CSI, Horatio offered this advice, "Talk to Ryan, Eric."
"Ryan?"
"It's his secret to tell, not mine."
"But what if he doesn't want to talk about it?"
"Then you need to respect his decision, and leave it at that."
"I can't, H. I don't know if I could just leave it alone now that I know about this."
Horatio stood up and walked towards him. Placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder, he repeated, "Just talk to Ryan, Eric. All you can do is try."
Nodding in resigned acknowledgement, Eric replaced the frame in its original position on top of the shelf and proceeded to walk away. But just as he was about to open the door, Horatio called out.
"Oh, and Eric?"
"Yeah, H?"
"If you want to know what happened today, then I suggest you talk to Ryan about that, too."
With a thin smile, Eric replied, "Thanks, H."
And with that, Eric walked out of Horatio's office, out of the Miami Dade Crime Lab, and out into the late afternoon sun. He got into his car and started making his way towards Ryan's condo.
He knew he needed some answers from Ryan, not just about what happened during the raid today, but also about this new revelation he had just discovered 'accidentally' while studying the pictures in Horatio's office…yeah, especially about that new piece of information.
Why didn't he notice this before? What kind of a CSI was he if he didn't even know about this bit of information about his best friend and his youngest team member? He shook his head, trying to keep his thoughts from going crazy over the questions that were currently bombarding his mind.
He knew that Ryan kept mostly to himself, and that he never talked much about his personal life. And what little he did divulge, he did so by choosing his words carefully, making sure that nothing slipped out unintentionally.
He had to somehow figure out how he would approach Ryan about this. He had to find out somehow. No…he needed to find out. And if he could help it, he wasn't going to let Ryan brush this off that easily. He wasn't going to make it easy for the young CSI to drop this whole thing either.
Because right now, Eric Delko was on a mission…
And when he's on a mission, Eric Delko doesn't fail.
TBC---
A/N: I know, I know…it's not clear yet what exactly Eric discovered from the photograph, what Horatio knows about Ryan and Speed, and what Ryan's secret is. I did that on purpose. But no worries…all of these will be answered in the next few chapters. Reviews are much loved! But no flaming please!
