After a certain amount of time, you forget the number that you've been counting for so long. I think I stopped at 64 or something like that. I can't seem to remember anymore and yet I'm only seventeen. Seventeen, best student in the class, heir to the Wonders fortune, and the name's Azumi Wonders which yes; I am the only son of Tadome Wonders. I have a bright future ahead of me, right? Tch, not like I care. I don't even have family to speak of.

My mother disappeared when I was newborn and my father fell apart from then on, taking more pride in his work than realizing at home he has a teenage son. Soon after I turned five did my father marry Ai Tamaguchi and thus she became Ai Tamaguchi Wonders, my faithfully damaged stepmother.

After Ai, came my little sister, Miko. She's about twelve now and she tags along whenever she can, which is not often considering she doesn't take after her mother's nosy footsteps. Miko-san chooses to fulfill her life in self gratification. She doesn't need other people to tell her what she's doing is a good thing, she knows it. She also knows she can never do me right. I don't have a place in the Wonders house. I feel like a happy plant dying from the inside out when I'm around this family, minus Miko-san.

When you think about it, you can imagine a child with all the money in the world and then some would be happy no matter if it was a material thing or not, but no. I have all the money I need and never have to worry about being out of a living. All I need to do is take over the better half of the economy my father controls, but that doesn't interest me. I don't really care for it. All I want in life, all I've ever wanted, was to know why my mother left me here to die and to live in my Wonderland.

"Young Master Wonders, is there anything else I can do?" My driver asked.

"No… leave… Do not return until I call," I sighed, the black car disappearing past the fields of wildflowers that smothered the hills.

I took in deep, cool breaths of air that blew around me and I loosened my laces that lined my shoes. Most would find what I am about to do, ludicrous, but I find it fitting. I swung my foot behind me and kicked my shoe off and counted the times it flipped in the blue sky as it landed in a tree. I repeated this as I stretched; making sure my drive wouldn't be back for a while. Sure enough, he did not return.

Walking isn't good enough; I have to run to get my rage out. I run as fast as my body will let me as I jump over a few stones and roots that sought out the sky. Each time I jump, I imagine I'm falling through another hole to Wonderland, to another world. No one can understand how badly I want to run, how badly I want to scream. No one.

I tripped, a very bad thing in this untamed world, and sliced my cheek open on a sharp rock. It hurt like hell, but it was nothing compared to the pain I felt living with the people that don't know I exist. My eyes water as I dig my nails into the skin around the cut to numb the pain and stand up. Rain begins to fall from the sky and suddenly the earth is drenched in tears of God. Who cannot see that I hurt so bad when everyone thinks I'm so happy. I'm so miserable and not even God cares to look my way. Or is he crying for me?

Over the seventeen years of my miserable life, I have no one to turn my way and smile with me and not one person looks and says I know you. I'm the shadow that everyone doesn't see, I am the Alice of this world. Betrayed, loved, hated, lost, scared, and lonely. I just wish I knew a connection for the life of me to get out of this drowning world. It hurts to breathe this gas of lies, but then again, so does living with the thought that my mother left because she just wanted to and not because she had to.