One Shot

Forever and a Day

In all my twenty seven years, I have never felt this much. I always loved my family and all that, but this is totally the opposite. It doesn't matter where I am or what I am doing, I am always thinking of her.

I met her on accident. Actually, I ran into her on my morning jog. I was flipping through the music on my iPod and not watching where I was running. She was stretching in front of her apartment building, getting ready to go jogging. I tackled the hell out of her, but hurt myself more than her. Next thing I knew I was sprawled out on the sidewalk with this gorgeous blonde looking down at me. She helped me up and I started sputtering apologies. She laughed at how flabbergasted I was and then invited me to jog with her.

We ran all morning and then had lunch together. She had shared with me that her name was Spencer Carlin and she was a writer. She grew up in the South and moved here to NY nearly five years ago. She had one biological brother and one adopted brother. Her parents had divorced while she was still in high school. I shared things about myself with her as well. I told her about my excuse of a mother, my dead rock star father, and my half-sister, Kyla. I didn't try to hide the fact that I was gay and she didn't have a problem telling me she was gay either.

At lunch she told me about how hard it was coming out in high school and to her mother. Her father and brothers supported her, but her mother made her life hell. She moved to the big apple to get away from all that. She told me that she misses her brothers and her father a lot. There wasn't much for me to tell about my coming out, because no one really cared. At first she didn't believe me when I told her that I wrote and sang songs. After I sang a little bit to her she believed me.

After lunch, I asked her if she wanted to hang out again sometime. She agreed and put her number in my phone and I put mine in hers. We had only just met, but we departed with a not awkward hug. It was then that I realized feelings were starting to grow in me for this girl. I went back to my apartment that evening after running a few errands. I stretched out on the couch and flipped the television on thinking I would watch something until I fell asleep. I couldn't focus on watching anything so I tried reading a book and that didn't work either. After an hour of trying to entertain myself, I finally gave in and called Spencer.

She answered on the third ring and I thought I had woken her up or something. She laughed when I asked and said she was trying to write, but was having a hard time. We talked for a few hours and I was able to talk her into going to dinner with me the next day. I went to bed with a huge grin on my face that night.

Spencer didn't let me kiss her until our third date. I count the day I met her as a date, because that day was so perfect it couldn't not be called a date. I walked her home from the theater on our third date and I really wasn't expecting a kiss, but she surprised me. After our good night hug, she started up the steps to her door, but turned around and stopped on the last step, leaned down with her forearms resting on my shoulders and kissed me. After that first kiss, I got brave and began surprising her with kisses all the time. She didn't seem to mind.

The first time she stayed the night with me at my apartment, the power went out due to a storm. That's when I found out about Spencer's fear of the dark and her need to cuddle. I couldn't help falling in love with her. I remember thinking about how adorable she was and how childish she could act sometimes. The next morning, after I untangled myself from her, which she did not like, I had to literally pull her off the bed so we wouldn't be late for a brunch with my sister.

Spencer has changed me in the way I eat, as in no more delish junk food, and in other ways that I can't explain. We had known each other for a month exactly when I asked her if we could be exclusive. She told me she already was exclusive with me. I agreed, because I was too.

When I met Spencer's family I had never felt so appreciated and loved. Her brother, Glen, and his wife Melanie treated me like family the first time we ever met. No handshakes were allowed, only hugs. I didn't have much of a relationship with my mother. We still don't associate if possible. My rock star father and I had a one of a kind relationship. He understood my drive and love of music and I understood his as well. He wasn't around much, but I truly believe he really tried to be and wanted to be. He died of an overdose on tour. My sister Kyla and I didn't see each other very often, but tried to get together during the holidays every year. So, feeling welcomed and loved by Spence's family meant a lot.

Spencer and I moved in together after being a couple for two years. We had our ups and downs, but we survived through it and no relationship is perfect. At the end of the day, though, I still love her more than anything and think what we have with each other will last forever. Spence and I had been living together for five months when I couldn't keep it in anymore and I asked her to marry me. She jumped on me and nearly knocked me over whilst squealing yeses.

My sister was surprised when I asked her to be my best woman. She told me she would love to do it for me. Glen's wife, Melanie, agreed to be Spencer's maid of honor. Our house was hectic up until the wedding with all the planning and what not.

On our wedding day during the reception we had a couple of unexpected guests. Arthur Carlin, Spence's father, showed up. He had said he couldn't get out of business meetings to make the wedding, but I contacted him and we talked for a good long while and at the end of the call he told me that he would be at mine and his daughter's wedding no matter what. He said to not tell Spencer and I agreed it would be a great surprise for my beloved.

Paula showed up as well. Spencer saw her first and I couldn't stop her from going to her mother, I tried. I don't know what Spencer said to Paula or what Paula said to Spencer before I got to them, but Spence was in tears and Paula looked pissed. I had Glen get Spencer away from the woman who bore the love of my life and I politely asked Paula to follow me outside. She did, reluctantly. I explained to Paula that I didn't want her around; because it only upset Spencer and that if she wanted to make things right with her daughter she could take the first step and leave.

And she left.

After all the drama at the reception, Spence and I left for our honeymoon. My dad left me everything when he died, including a cabin in Tennessee right on the edge of the river. We spent two weeks there. Making love, fishing, jet skiing, just talking, boating, getting freaky naughty, hiking, cooking, and more love making. We talked about our future and decided that we wanted two kids someday. It was, no doubt, an amazing couple weeks.

Spencer and I were married almost ten months when her first book was published. It was instantly a best-seller and when Spence went on a book tour I was right beside her. I'm not a reading person, but I did read my love's book. At a book signing, a girl wanted Spence and my autograph. I didn't think anything about it until afterwards. Why would she want my autograph? Spencer could read my face and knew I was confused. She smiled, opened her book up to the second page and slid it in front of me, showing me a page that I missed.

For my love Ashley, who inspires me and owns my heart completely. Forever and a day.

Three months later Spencer collapsed in our kitchen one morning. I called an ambulance in tears while I was checking to see if she was still breathing. She was and I held her sitting in the floor, crying, and making sure she was breathing and her heart was beating every five seconds. When the ambulance got there and got my Spence on a stretcher and in the ambulance she regained consciousness.

While the EMT's were hooking Spencer up to machines and IV's, I grabbed hold of her free hand and she squeezed it. She looked at me and smiled. I smiled back the best I could for her through my tears.

"Remember how shy you were when we first met?" I sniffled and nodded.

"Yeah, I could barely speak without stuttering." We both laughed.

"I fell in love with you that day and I'll never stop loving you, Ash." I squeezed her hand and tears rolled down my face. She was talking like she knew something that I didn't want to think about ever.

"I love you more, Spence. Just hold on for me. Please, I love you too much."

We arrived at the hospital and I held Spencer's hand as we entered the double doors. The stretcher stopped in front of the employee only doors and I leaned down to kiss my love on the lips.

"I love you, Spence." She smiled peacefully at me.

"I love you forever and a day, Ash." And before I was ready, the nurses rolled her away from me through those doors.

I called Glen and Kyla and told them to get to the hospital right away.

They both got there in less than fifteen minutes. An hour passed and I was in agony afraid for my wife. Almost another hour passed before a doctor called my name. Everything was in slow motion as I walked up to the doctor who knew if my Spence was okay or not.

When he said that my wife's heart failed and she didn't make it, I almost hit the floor, but Glen caught me before I did. They offered to let me see her, but I wanted to remember her smiling at me. I wanted to remember her alive and well. I wanted to remember the warm love in her hypnotizing blue eyes whenever she looked at me.

After her funeral, I moved to the cabin in Tennessee where Spence and I shared our honeymoon. I thank God every day for the just over three years that I got to spend with her.

I buried her in a small garden of remembrance not far from the cabin. I walk over there every day with a flower for her and I carry a book with me to read to her some days. I never was a reader until I met Spence and read her work. Now I am an avid reader. Spence would be proud I think.

Sometimes I sing to her too, but only to her and the birds.

I don't know that I could ever leave this place.

I don't want to.

It feels like she's here with me even if she's just a memory.

I am happy here with her.

A/N: I don't know about this one. I thought I would post it anyways. Let me know what you think, good or bad. Thanks for reading and a special thanks to those who REVIEW.

-Ivy