a/n: Lucky number thirteen! Woot! Woot! Follow's Desina's "Getting to Know You". My profile sports the complete list of our follow-ups, please stop by if you need the order to the chaos. Spoilers for the deleted scenes from 'What They Seem'. To avoid any spoilers for this follow-up, I have posted a second a/n at the bottom. Oh, and pun absolutely intended with the title. Enjoy!

Ay, There's the Rub

Six messages, the machine blinks.

Kate presses play.

"Hello, my baby. It's your mother." Kate looks at me and smiles as she lifts a hand to my face to pinch my cheek. I playfully push her away. "I found a box of your stuff. A few CDs…What's this?" I can hear a noise in the background, and I know Mom was digging through the box while she was on the phone. "Oh, there are also some love notes you wrote to Carrie when you were in high school. I don't understand why you didn't give them to her. Ben, these are so sweet! Carrie was such a nice girl. And pretty, too. Look at this! Oh, well, I guess you can't actually see it. It's a picture of you when you were…oh, maybe fifteen? Sixteen? I don't know, but you're wearing your blue shirt, the one you used to wear when you worked at that pizza place. Remember that?" Kate starts to giggle. "You had the cutest little mustache, barely there but you were proud of what little facial hair you could grow." Kate laughs harder, batting away my hands as I reach for the button to skip to the next message.

"Stop it," she smiles. "I want to hear the rest."

"It took a while for that little bit of fuzz on your chin to come in as a full beard, too. But, like I always used to tell you, it's all part of becoming a big boy."

"Oh my god," I mumble, burying my face in my hands.

"Anyway, call me and let me know what I should do with this stuff." The message ends with a beep.

"Throw it away!" I yell at the phone, much to Kate's delight.

"I so need to get my hands on that picture."

"No, you really don't." She offers me a fake pout and pushes the button to play the second message.

"Hey, Benny. It's me, Beth." I frown. How the hell did she get this number? "I'm moving back to San Francisco and I thought you could take me out to dinner." Kate raises an eyebrow.

"Ex," I say, shaking my head. "Never again."

"But she sounds so sweet and innocent," Kate smiles.

"Yeah," I laugh nervously. "'Sweet and innocent' are not the words I would use. Beth is the reason I changed the number."

"Oh." She nods her understanding. "Crazy?"

"A basket-full." Her attention returns to the machine as it beeps to signal the end of the message. She presses the button again.

"Greetings from Alcatraz," the voice purrs. "It's Lydia. I have been eyebrow deep in cases and could really use a night to…well, I was going to say 'let off some steam' but if I recall correctly, the steam just seems to follow us. Especially when we're in the back of your car." Lydia sighs. "It really is too bad that you bought the Aston Martin. There's no room in the back seat for our kind of fun." Kate looks at me at this point, a small frown of confusion knitting her brow. "Oh, well. Maybe we can go on another tour of Alcatraz. And I do remember what I said to you a few weeks ago, but I promise not to leave you handcuffed to the cell. This time." The message ends and Kate tilts her head to the side. I don't like the way she is looking at me.

"So, Lydia? Is she an ex-girlfriend, too?" I wince inwardly. This isn't really going as smoothly as I had planned. I had not anticipated actually having to answer any questions about these crazy women.

"Not…not exactly."

"Not exactly," Kate repeats as she crosses her arms, nicely framing her barely covered chest. "You talked to her a few weeks ago?"

"I spoke to Lydia because she was opposing counsel." She takes a moment to think, then nods her head as the recollection dawns.

"The baseball player that was going to sue Reed and Reed…" I nod. "She was…" I nod again. "Hmm. So do you frequently speak to opposing counsel about handcuffing you to a cell at Alcatraz? I thought you weren't leading on these women."

"I'm not," I assure her.

"So if she's not an ex, what, exactly is she?"

"Uh…um…well…" Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, the articulate litigator is making an encore appearance.

"Sexual conquest?" she offers, raising her eyebrow. My wince is very much visible now.

"Not…not exactly."

"Not exactly."

"'Conquest' is not really the…right…word."

"What is the right word?"

"I…I…Uh…"

"I'm waiting, Benedict," she says, impatiently tapping her foot.

"Okay, maybe 'conquest' is the right word. But-" Kate doesn't give me a chance to say more. She rolls her eyes, loudly sighing her irritation, and pushes the button for the fourth message.

"Benedict, call your mother. It's been two days since I left you a message. This box of stuff won't take care of itself."

"Call your mother, Benedict," she sneers, stabbing the button.

"Hello, Mr. Grogan. Uh, Ben," the woman laughs lightly. "This is Victoria Connors. Victoria. Actually, call me Vicki." Oh hell. Kate mouths the name and her eyes widen as she figures out who Victoria Connors is.

"Connors? Judge Connors?" she screams at me.

"I can explain," I say quickly, holding up my hands as though the action will stop any tantrums.

"I had such a wonderful time listening to your arguments in the Golden Gate Jumper case. I would love to discuss it further. Over dinner, perhaps? I'll cook for you again." I drop my eyes to the floor as Judge Connors leaves her number and provocatively requests that I return her call.

"I'll cook for you…again?" Kate laughs a disbelieving, almost disgusted laugh. "Go ahead," she says, motioning towards me with her hand.

"Go ahead and…what?" I point to the answering machine. "Call her?"

"No!" She slaps my arm. "You said you could explain. So explain." I open my mouth and realize that explaining Judge Connors means bringing up Justin. Damn it. I close my mouth and smile uneasily. "Nice, Ben." Kate leaves the room, heading towards the front door. "Dinner with the judge, discussing a case." She lifts her hands as she stalks through the living room, making air quotes.

"Katie, please." I trot along behind her, quickly stepping around her to block the path to the door.

"Is that how you got Beth into bed?"

"No, well, kind of, but-"

"What about Lydia? Were you discussing a case with her?" I place my hands on her shoulders.

"Katie-"

"Don't lie to me, Ben," she orders, shrugging my hands away.

"No, that is not how I got Lydia into bed." I pause for a moment. I know I'm going to regret the words that are going to come out of my mouth. "That's how she got me into bed."

"Oh my god." She shakes her head and walks around me, stopping just short of the door. As she turns to me, she points a finger in my direction. "That night…that night you came back to the office looking for your keys…"

"The night you almost bludgeoned me to death with your saxophone?"

"Yes, that night. You were drunk."

"Drunk-ish," I remind her.

"You said that your presence at Judge Connors house was, and I'm quoting here," she says with a smart ass smirk, "'the longest story ever'." I nod. "Well, Mr. Grogan, the night is young and I could use a good story."

"I didn't say it was a good story." Kate moves closer to me, playing with the buttons on my shirt again.

"Please, Ben?" she begs, batting the lashes around her large, brown eyes. She steps into me, pressing her body against mine, and I lose all ability to think rationally.

"Katie," I breathe. She smiles, not a friendly smile, mind you, and suddenly I feel like the goat fed to the T-rex in that dinosaur movie. She takes my hand, leading me out of the office and into the living room. As she sits on the middle cushion of the couch, she pulls me down onto the cushion to her left.

"Judge Connors," she says slowly.

"Judge Connors." She lifts an eyebrow, prompting me to start the story. "All right," I sigh. "Justin and I had an agreement on a plea bargain for the Golden Gate Jumper. Until we met with the judge. Turns out that she believed our agreement was too harsh. Since that's what I told Justin before agreeing to his terms, I decided to retract and see how I could play Judge Connors."

"How you could play her."

"Not like that. I thought I could get the plea dropped to more favorable terms for my client." Kate nods, so I continue. "Well, she asked that Justin and I read a few cases and discuss our deal. She said she had a full schedule and asked us to meet her at her house, after hours."

"You and Justin?"

"Yes. When we got there, she had this elaborate dinner made for us. We spent the evening discussing our view points over the cases she asked us to read." I shrugged. "Long story short, turns out that she likes smart men who debate well." Kate tips her head to the side, pondering the information I have given her. I lift my hands. "End of story. I swear." I can't read her face, I don't know if she believes me.

"So you and Justin were...your debating was…sex. For her." Interesting that Kate draws the same conclusion as Lauren. Is this a woman thing? Or did I miss some kind of sign along the way?

"Yeah. I guess," I answer. "And I wasn't going back into the house for my keys. Hence, my late night trip to Reed and Reed." Kate remains silent for a moment, absently wrapping the end of a strand of hair around her finger.

"Is Beth a lawyer?" she asks.

"What?"

"Is Beth a lawyer?"

"Yes." Kate shifts her position on the couch, leaning slightly closer to me.

"So Beth, your ex, is a lawyer. Lydia, your conquest, is a lawyer. And then there's the judge." I frown, not sure where she is heading with this thought. "That's quite a pattern, Benedict."

"I don't get out much," I shrug sheepishly.

"How did you manage to leave your keys at the judge's house?"

"I don't know. They must have fallen out of my coat pocket."

"Are you sure you didn't go back into the house to…" She lifts her fingers to make another set of air quotes. "Get your keys?" I smirk slightly.

"Are you implying that I did something less than honorable with…Her Honor?"

"I'm simply wondering what happened while you were waiting for the cab that Justin called for you. How do I know that you didn't go back to get your keys." She smiles as she repeats her joke.

"I didn't go back to…" Wait a minute. What? I lean back slightly, eyeing Kate as though she is foreign to me because, honestly, right now I don't know who I am dealing with. "How did you know that Justin called a cab for me?"

"Um, well, you said the two of you left the house and he called a cab because you didn't have your keys."

"No, I did not say that."

"So if you a-are not leading on these ladies, why is it that they go to the trouble to find your unlisted number? There has to be something you're not telling me." I shake my head, refusing to let her change the subject.

"I think there's something you are not telling me, Katie. How did you know that Justin called the cab?" She stands and moves to the middle of the room.

"Maybe…maybe you told me that while you were digging through your office looking for your spare set of keys." She turns and looks nervously at me.

"Unbelievable," I mutter slowly, standing and moving towards her. "Do you already know this story?" She smiles slightly and shrugs ever so briefly. "Did Justin tell you?" I ask, narrowing my eyes.

"He might have…might have mentioned something about it." I cross my arms, wondering just when that conversation happened, and what, if anything else, may have transpired. "Oh, it was nothing like that," she says quickly, as though she can read my thoughts. "We had a quick lunch together a couple of days after it happened. It was a funny story." She smiles widely, but this time, her infectious giddiness is not contracted.

"You've been playing me," I accuse.

"It's your fault. You said you like to know what you're getting and I took that as a challenge."

"To deceive me?"

"You make it sound a lot less funny."

"It's not funny." I move back to the couch, sitting heavily.

"Oh, Ben," she laughs as she joins me. "It really was."

"No, Katie, it wasn't." I shift my eyes to the floor, searching for the right words. "I was trying in earnest to…"

"Ben…"

"…give you something in the way of…"

"Ben…"

"…this getting to know each other thing that you…"

"Ben!"

"What?" I turn to my right to find Kate just inches from my face. It takes me just a moment longer to register the fact that she is leaning over me and her hand is rubbing my leg, making its way up the inside of my thigh.

"Shut up," she whispers, pressing her mouth to mine.

a/n2: The description of the picture of Ben is courtesy of Ryan Johnson's 'awkward teen' picture posted on his Twitter account. Skinny pizza deliveryman is yet another of his many talents.