Nobody on the road,
Nobody on the beach.
I feel it in the air,
The summer's out of reach.
Empty lake, empty streets.
The sun goes down alone.
Roxas lounged on the pool raft, eyes shut tight as to block out the sun. This summer had been the craziest of his life. The exuberant redhead that had burst into it with little introduction, had also been yanked out of it with little farewell.
It left a disgusting taste of melancholy in mouth, along with the bittersweet taste of Axel's Juicy Fruit. He would, maybe, see the boy again but Destiny Islands was notorious for rich houses, an amazing faux beach, and steamy teen hook-ups on the tennis courts.
There wasn't much to do, since everyone was gone, but he did have free reign of the beach and movie theater. But going to the beach reminded him of Axel's pale skin and sinewy muscles, and the abandoned movie theater made him think of mid-horror movie blowjobs.
Everywhere he went, Axel's taunting shadow followed.
I'm drivin' by your house,
Though I know you're not at home.
The blond wondered somewhere in the back of his mind if Axel had forgotten anything in the house that he and his family had stayed in, and debated whether or not it would be complete suicide to go find the key.
It was.
The cleaning ladies had done an amazing job cleaning up, all the sheets changed and carpets shampooed. But if he went into the closet, pressed himself into the furthest corner and hugged Axel's wife beater,
(it had been by the pool, he remembered Axel stripping it off and throwing it onto a lawn chair. After they'd had sex on the chair though, it had ended up on the ground. Then he found it in the bushes)
to his chest, he could see the boy leaning over him, elbow crooked and face lecherously close to his own. The white fabric still withheld the smell of sweat, detergent, and hair gel.
I never will forget those nights.
I wonder if it was a dream.
Remember how you made me crazy?
Remember how I made you scream?
Roxas remembered the kisses that felt like chewing Big Red, hot and burning, and more uncomfortable then pleasant; but addicting nonetheless.
Now, I don't understand what happened to our love.
But babe, I'm gonna get you back,
I'm gonna show you what I'm made of.
He can only hope that Axel's family will be back. Roxas will be the one to impress, this time. He isn't trapped in a swirling world of pastel colors and ugly shoes anymore; not that he was a part of it to begin with.
He knows Axel saw potential in him, which is why he took Roxas under his leather clad arm, let cold metal flick across his ear as he sneered insults there. Why he yanked Roxas out of his big rubber inner tube and inside his smoky personal bubble, inside himself.
Roxas allowed Axel to stretch him into his own mold, the one he hadn't been prepared to fill yet. He barely even put up a fight when Axel threw his Crocs into the lake.
Out on the road today,
I saw a black flag sticker on a Cadillac.
A little voice inside my head said,
"Don't look back, you can never look back"
When Axel was around he thought of the other boy like a mentor, teaching how to be cool, how to be passionate, and how to be himself.
Now, he realizes Axel was teaching him how to feel. He had been barely drifting through life, never talking to anyone, never doing anything. He was simply there. He thought he would get through school, get through college, force his way through adulthood just as he had childhood and his teen years, and simply be done with it.
He had been an empty shell of what he'd seen around him, what everyone expected. He was still like that, he supposed, to everyone else.
But now he was brimming with knowledge of who he was and what he liked. All things he had known but never bothered to think about.
Axel had given him advice, breathed life into him with each of his burning, tingling kisses.
I thought I knew what love was,
What the fuck did I know?
Those days are gone forever.
I should just let them go but…
