Game Night Memories Ch. 1

"Sorry Commander, but I believe that is a screw you," Vega's laugh filled the room, and Shepard could feel the credits flying out of her pocket even as she smiled. Vega took a swig from a bottle of what a Volus on the Citadel had called "Batarian Fire Water". The smell was thick, and she swore it burned her nose when he opened it. Still she wanted to down a bit at that moment. She had been saving for a new model ship. Shepard tossed down her cards with a smirk.

"Keep that up James and I'll make you help Garrus with his calibrations," She said.

Garrus leaned toward Shepard, his eyes lively as ever.

"Only if by "help" you mean ruin."

"Hey, I know something about guns." Vega lifted an arm flexing his muscles with a cheesey smirk on his mouth. "All kinds of guns."

Garrus tilted his head, leaning back in his seat. "Little ones, Vega, just the little ones."

With that a mixture of challenging howls and laughter erupted in the small room. It was bustling with the crew and another body could scarcely fit around the card table, but that was to be expected when they were in drydock. A few of the crewmen sat at the bar with glasses in hand. Tali and Donelly chatted about technical improvements over drinks. According to him this was to help Tali avoid overdoing the use of her "emergency induction port," which Shepard heartily approved of. Kaidan sat to Shepard's left, while Cortez sat next to Vega. Joker had been cleaned out twenty minutes before and was sitting in a corner with a half full glass.

Shepherd found the lively bustle a nice change from the usual anxious energy that permeated the Normandy. She was not one for crowds, but being surrounded by her crew, her friends and family, made things lighter. She would protect them through hell and back. Soon, she would lead them deeper into hell than they had ever been. Shepard swallowed, her leg twitched, as she began to tap her foot against the floor. Quiet before the storm.

She fought back her thoughts, letting out a small huff. "So, what is it James? I said you could get whatever you want-"

"Not whatever-" Kaidan piped up.

Shepherd raised her brow, a soft chuckle escaped her lips.

"Someone's jealous? Don't worry Kaidan, I make Vega blush too much for that."

At this Vega tensed up a little and the slight red rising to his cheeks only made Shepard laugh. Whenever he blushed she couldn't help but be amused by how cute it was. Like when a grandmother pinched a little boy's cheeks. Perhaps it was the booze or the sheer lack of formality in the moment…or perhaps it was because they could die at any moment, but she felt completely open. She had no reservations, or at least as close as Shepard could let herself get to that. So maybe she did have a few.

"So James what will it be? More credits, store discount, or do you want me to teach you how to really use a gun?"

Vega smiled a moment and looked down into bottle in his hand. His brown eyes betrayed him, and the level of deep thought in them made her almost flinch. There was something reserved about how he looked up at her then down at his drink. It was like he was expecting to be reprimanded. Not a good sign.

` "Come on Vega, can't be that bad?" Shepard said.

"Look I will think of something if you can't, though I'm thinking all my answers involve her teaching you how to shoot," Garrus said.

Slowly Vega leaned back in his seat, looking to Garrus with mock scorn. The testosterone was borderline palatable in the room. Joker raised an eyebrow at Shepard, throwing her a look that said "Can you believe these two?" and Shepard shook her head letting out another laugh. Would you have it any other way?

"You can do some fancy tricks, Scars, but you know I pack the real fire power."

"You call that fire power?" Garrus retorted.

Shepherd scoffed, running her fingers through her hair, reclining back in her seat.

"You know I could warp your asses either way, so come on Vega what is it?"

Vega shrugged, taking another drink before setting it down slowly. He always had a look to him like he tried not to care too much, but the trained eye could tell what it was. He was always questioning, analyzing in his own unique way. Vega was no genius, but he was smart and had the common sense to know when to be wary. It didn't make Shepard feel any more comfortable.

"Ya know, Lola, I've told you a lot about me. We all have."

From the background Tali shouted "Here's to that!" and Shepard knew Donnelly failed in his task.

"Never heard too much about you." He paused, and looked self conscious. "Well beyond the legend."

She shrugged, sucking in her cheek. It was true, but that was because there wasn't much to say. She had bad times and horrible times along with good ones. Perhaps knowing almost every major detail of their lives was somewhat unfair when they knew nothing but the basics of hers. Commander Winter Shepard; Hero of the Alliance. Butcher of Torfan. Survivor of Mindoir.

It was a bit lacking, when fact was she could probably tell each of their life stories with incredible detail. Tali spent her youth living up to her father's potential. Her mother died when she was a child. Though sweet and naive during her pilgrimage, she became a level headed wonderful young woman living for the fleet and her father's memory. She missed the creaking of the floatilla ships, but when she got back it wasn't the same. Her father would bring her fancy dextro-cheeses whenever he assisted trades, and her mother would help her with her homework even when she could barely talk. Yeah, Shepard knew a hell of a lot about her team. The barest inkling of guilt rose in her chest, and she could feel it hit against her buzz.

"You've seen my records." She leaned forward again. "Other than that not much to add."

"Yeah, but that's different."

Shepard nodded, as the sense of dread in her veins deepened. James Vega was never this hesitant about anything. In fact, she was pretty sure he liked diving head long into trouble. It was admirable, but the anticipation he displayed made her heart skip a beat or two. The cautious way he spoke was leading her into a trap, but she had lost and could not escape without pulling rank or being an asshole. Shit.

"Look I'm not trying to go somewhere I shouldn't, but what happened on Mindoir?"

The room grew quiet. Nervous and curious faces looked around, as if asking to turn back the clock or searching for answers, but no one looked at Shepard. It was not that people hadn't wondered. She knew they had, but every time she thought about telling any of them invisible fingers grasped her throat, and her mind felt foggy like when she pushed her biotics too hard. They had heard the basic story because it was the Alliance's feel good story of the year, a girl who lost everything saves the seat of galactic parliament. Her family was killed by Batarian slavers, but the details were slim hidden behind black out, red tape, and veterans who shook their heads and sighed. Nothing else could or should be said.

"That was years ago." Her voice was steady without any anger or affectation. She had maintained the barrier for years; the emotions had all been sufficiently dimmed and ignored. Still her discomfort grew, and she shifted anxiously in her seat.

"Yeah." Vega played with his hands alternating between interlocking his fingers and tapping them against his wrist.

"Why are you curious?"

"A lot of red tape there, Shepard. There were a lot of things happening when the Batarians attacked. I knew some people who were raised there. I did some favors, for a few of them looking up details reports didn't tell. " He paused, as if he wasn't sure how to phrase what was coming next. "Your neighbors had the same story in near the exact same words, and like the reports...things had holes."

She could still remember sitting with Anderson at a bar on the citadel toasting her new spectre status. It had been a good night, but both of them had been waiting for the pin to drop. She had let it fall. "I shouldn't even be here. What happened...and...shit I should probably be dead like them. My parents were supposed to live to see shit like this, Sir. Forgive me if I can't be too happy."

Anderson never flinched.

"You overcame, Shepard, and they'd be damned proud."

James wasn't being unkind, and judging by his voice and his belief in Shepard hadn't been compromised by her...sanitized past. He was genuinely curious about her past.

"Vega, come on drop it-" Kaidan was trying to be her knight, to save her from pain. He didn't know anymore than they did, but he had seen her in the quiet moments when the memory tries to surface. Kaidan was a good man.

"It's ok." Shepard managed a small smile at Kaidan, whose face curled with concern. "I think my crew deserves to know me better. Hell, it seems like I know damn near everything about half the crew, and that's not even including the people I worked with in Cerberus." She laced her fingers together shutting her eyes before staring down at her hands. Her lips parted as if to speak, but the words got caught in her chest. This was absurd, she had given speeches, comforted victims, and saved the galaxy but this little thing gripped at her core.

"Commander, forget I asked." Vega gathered the cards and began shuffling them again. His eyes were focused downward, as if he had crossed a line or like if he looked at her she'd break. Shepard wasn't weak. She didn't need protection anymore she was a damn adult. Her eyes opened narrowing in on James as she reached for Kaidan's glass of whiskey. Shepard knocked it back ignoring the burning in the back of her throat before licking her lips.

"A lot of shit went down. I've fought Geth, Reapers, and a fucking Thresher Maw, but I was ready for them in a weird kind of way. The batarians…yeah they…they caught everyone off guard." She stared at the green felt table and a mirthless laugh escaped her lips. "I was just a kid...s" A dull tingling had crept up her hands and she drew in a slow deep breath to keep them from trembling. "Funny thing, though the one thing I always remember is that day I woke to my favorite smell in the world, the saltiness of imported American bacon and waffles."

**This chap. is somewhat slow, but trust me when I say this picks up speed.*