Lost

(A/N: I don't own the Secret Of NIMH! Just Little Cinnamon/Lost)

I sat the base of a large oak tree at the edge of a forest. A blanket I managed to stitch from moss and thread I found was draped over my shoulders. My eyes wandered up to the starry sky, and a sigh escaped my lips. I'm called Lost, or at least, that what I've called myself. I used to be called Little Cinnamon. I shuddered. Such memories were painful to think about. Regardless, they kept poking and prodding my mind. Why? Why did the Creator put me in such a facility? Why did such a place even exist? My intelligent mind still clung on to those memories of the National Institute of Mental Health. The effects of their tests on me were both blessings and curses.

I huddled closer to the bark of the tree and curled myself up. Sleep wasn't an option for me. The memories even haunted my dreams. I had really been exhausted the past 6 months. I wished I could forget…I wish I could forget NIMH. I wanted to forget NIMH, and Jonathan, and Nicodemus, and…Juliet… My eyes watered, and as I clamped them shut, tears squeezed out of them. Juliet was the worst memory. But, it came to me, and there was no way I could stop it…


I was 6 months younger then, but I looked a lot better than I did now. My tan-colored fur was sleek, while now it was ragged and filthy. My eyes, once bright and clear, were now dazed and tired. I was in such good shape back then because I was a fancy rat, a simple pet, to a woman named Juliet. She was a nice woman to me. She was unmarried and childless. I was the only thing that closely resembled a child to her. She bought me when I was a kit, and raised me alone. I loved her so much, like a mother. She named me Little Cinnamon after my fur, and because I was pretty small in comparison to other male rats. I lived in a cage near a window. Every spring and summer, I got to bask in sunlight; in fall and winter, I got to sleep with a warm blanket covering my cage. We lived in the city, so it was noisy at times. But it was alright. It never bothered us. Juliet was a schoolteacher, so I didn't see her all day. I would wait eagerly for her return. My daily routine consisted of this:

7:00 am: I wake up, and get breakfast from Juliet before she leaves for work.

7:15 am: I watch Juliet leave for work.

7:15 am-3:00 pm: I wait for Juliet to get back from work. I usually took this time to daydream about the things we'd probably do later. I also would mimic Juliet's movements of unlatching my cage door to explore the house. I was especially careful to leave things where I found them.

3:00 pm-4:00 pm: Juliet comes home, and rests after a long day. I'm back in my cage by then. Juliet takes me back out of the cage to play with me. Usually she talks to me about her day, and I listen without interruptions.

4:00 pm-6:00 pm: This usually varies depending on Juliet's mood. Sometimes we go to the park, or the pet store to buy me toys and meet other pets from around the neighborhood. This is my favorite part of the day.

6:05 pm: We come home.

6:05 pm-7:15pm: I eat dinner and spend some time with Juliet again.

7:30 pm: I am put back in my cave, and Juliet bathes, eats her dinner, and retires to her bedroom.

Repeat.

This routine was pretty repetitive, but we went along with it because we loved it. It was just the two of us, and that's how we liked it.

Until Dr. Rachelle.

He met Juliet on one of our trips to the park. Juliet was interested in him immediately. Before long, he became a frequent visitor. Juliet would invite him over, and they'd go on dates. They'd kiss and cuddle on the couch. I was never brought out to play during those times, and our routine was starting to dwindle. I grew worried. Was Juliet ever gonna return to me? No. She wasn't.

Then it happened. Juliet was wearing a golden ring on her hand, and her belly was swollen up. She was married and pregnant. Now, she would have more important things to worry about other than me. Our routine was broken. Juliet was too busy with Dr. Rachelle, her job, and her pregnancy to play with me, and spend time with me like we used to. I was now alone in my cage, no longer family, but a simple pet. But this wasn't the worst part. The worst happened one day when Dr. Rachelle was observing me oddly. Juliet wasn't around at the time, and I was alone with him in the house. I shivered, feeling uncomfortable under his icy gaze. He took my cage suddenly, and we were out of the house, and in a car. I cowered in my cage, unsure what to do. We drove for a while, and then stopped. I was carried into a building…NIMH…

The next few weeks were horrendous. Syringes of strange fluids were injected into me, and I felt agonizing pain. The needles were like solid fire, and the liquids hurt in my body. I felt like I wanted to tear myself in half to ease the pain. And what was worse, I never saw Juliet again. I would pray at night that she'd come to take me away from the madness, but she never came. I was devastated, betrayed, and…lost. I was now lost in myself. I wasn't Little Cinnamon anymore.

I shared a cage with two rats named Justin and Nicodemus. Justin was around my age, while Nicodemus older. I didn't speak much to them much. I noticed something odd about me. I felt different. My mind was functioning in a way I had never felt before. Like the others, I had become intelligent. Justin, Nicodemus, and the others had decided to plan an escape. They could read and understand the human writing on the cages, and were able to free themselves. Nicodemus asked me if I wanted to join them. They needed all the help they could get. Seeing as I had nothing to lose, and I was too afraid to endure anymore experiments, I agreed. So, we escaped. I witnessed great bravery and tragic loss that night. One of the bravest acts I had seen came from a mouse named Jonathan. We were free and away from that wretched place. But, I didn't stay with the others. I told them that I'd go my own way. I didn't want any company anymore. I was still hurting inside. After I had changed my name to Lost, I was off into the wild.


My face was wet with tears from such painful memories. I just couldn't stand it anymore. Flinging the blanket off, I started up the tree, digging my claws into the bark and climbing as high as I could. I perched on a very high branch and looked down. It was time to end it. I jumped off. I slammed into the ground. There was pain at first, but then nothing.