This was originally posted under my old fanfiction name but I've decided to let that one lay dormant collecting dust as the works created under that name were for a fandom that is no longer active.
That being said, as I was writing one of those stories - "A Generous Heart" - I had wanted to devote a lot more time to the recovery process after such an event, however with everything else going on in that fic, it was not possible.
It was a treat to be able to sit down and write this and I hope it comes across as a true reflection of how one can recover after sexual assault. Being that it is focused on the recovery aspect, note that no actual explicit descriptions of rape are depicted. However, there may be some consensual NSFW passages in later chapters. ;)
Comments much appreciated.
This work is NOT related to any of my other works (yet).
Chapter 1 - Click
"Hey, Per, you comin'?"
Peridot swiveled her chair around and looked at her friend Amethyst who was clearly dressed to go out. "Hadn't planned on it.
"You're a sophomore and you have yet to go to a party."
"Do I look like the partying type?"
"No, but I can fix that."
Peridot surveyed her friend's perfect makeup and indigo top over dark leggings. Amethyst's lilac hair fell full and soft down her back. Amethyst was dark and mysterious with curves that drove men crazy and deep brown eyes that told them they didn't have a chance. She always looked put together whereas Peridot was a pasty, skinny nerd with glasses and blonde hair that didn't want to behave.
Amethyst started rummaging through the closet. "You don't own a lot of cute clothes do you? Hey, this might work." She held up a light green button down shirt for Peridot to consider. It was a flattering color and a style that would accentuate her frame if she had boobs to speak of.
"Fine," Peridot said, grabbing the shirt. "But I'm wearing jeans with it." She stripped down to her waist, unashamed in front of her best friend and donned a padded bra that filled her out to at least a B-cup, then covered with the shirt. It had that fresh-from-the-store smell; she plucked the price tag off. After giving her hair a quick swipe with a comb and making sure her glasses were polished, she headed for the door.
"What are you doing? You need makeup."
"I don't wear makeup." Not entirely true, she had for special occasions like prom or a family wedding she had gone to, but not on a daily basis. She only had a limited amount of makeup anyway.
That, however, did not stop Amethyst, who went and rummaged in the bathroom and came out with a black makeup case. Her friend made a face as she pulled out a foundation much darker than Peridot's skin tone. "What's this for?"
"Lapis…all that makeup is hers."
"Eh, what she doesn't know. Your skin is fine anyway. Let's just play up your eyes."
There was clearly no talking Amethyst out of this. "Fine, just don't make me look like a…you know…night worker."
"That would take a lot more than eyeshadow and mascara."
Peridot took off her glasses, making the whole room blurry and let Amethyst work her magic. Her friend also added blush and then handed her a tube of red lipstick. That's where she drew the line. "Too severe." She walked into the bathroom and squinted her eyes to survey her collection of five makeup items in the cabinet, choosing the pale pink lip gloss she had and leaning close to the mirror to swipe it on. "Stars, I'm blind without my glasses." She retrieved them from the desk when she returned to Amethyst and looked at herself in the full length mirror on her roommate's side. She actually thought she looked rather pretty without overdoing it; even her hair seemed to be controlling itself today.
The party was at a house off campus and was in full swing by the time they got there. A lot of people were already drunk and Amethyst grabbed them both a shot of something, shoving the red plastic cup into Peridot's hand and yelling: "Cheers!"
Peridot took a small sip of the strong smelling liquid and decided she didn't like it. She was nineteen and shouldn't be drinking anyway. However, to prove to Amethyst she wasn't a total stick in the mud, she downed the offensive liquid quickly and coughed. She turned to face her friend, but she had disappeared into the crowd.
"Not much for tequila?" A smooth voice asked.
"I guess not."
The guy smiled and started pouring random liquor into a large red cup. "I'm Kevin."
"Peridot."
"That's…an interesting name."
"It's my birthstone. My friends call me Peri usually."
"Peri…I like it. You ever had Midori?" When she shook her head, he continued. "It's a melon liqueur, brilliant green," he poured some in, "just like your eyes."
She accepted the cup from him. "Thanks."
"You take Japanese?"
"I did in high school. Midori means 'green'." Though she could have just guessed that from their conversation.
"Yes, very good."
Peridot, already feeling tipsy from the shot, took a sip of this new drink. It was sweet without the harsh bite the tequila had. "I've seen you in a couple of my classes."
"Yeah, I'm studying engineering. What's your major?"
"Computer science." She took another swig of her drink, feeling more confident. She wasn't interested in guys romantically, but Kevin seemed like he could be a good friend.
They discussed a shared interest in video games and a dislike of the current pop star now singing over the speakers. She accepted another drink despite the fact that she was now slurring her words and should really probably stop.
"Hey, Per, how's it going?" Amethyst asked when they found each other again.
"OmigoshAmesyouhavegottotrythisisssssoooogooood! IttasteslikealiquidOtterPop…"
Amethyst, who seemed pretty sober, took a sip. "What is in this? This is the booziest drink I've ever tasted." She quickly downed three quarters of it, before handing it to her clearly intoxicated friend who swallowed the last of it. "Okay, Miss Otter Pop, let's call a cab and get you back to the dorm."
Kevin interjected. "I'll drive you. I haven't been drinking."
"That is sooooo shweet!" Peridot said a little too loudly. "He'sss…gonnadriveme."
"Are you sure?" Amethyst asked. "I don't know how annoying she'll be drunk."
Kevin laughed. "It's fine."
Amethyst pulled her aside and dropped her voice. "Are you sure? Because I'll call a cab or something."
She looked over Amethyst's shoulder at the guy her friend had been flirting with. "Noooooyouhalffun. Kevinseemscool."
"Well, okay, but text me when you get to the dorm."
"Ofcoursh I will." Peridot hugged Amethyst. "Thanksh soooo mush for make me party…"
Amethyst snickered and rolled her eyes. "I should be recording this. Drink lots of water when you get back. See you later, Otter Pop."
As they turned to leave, Kevin handed her another shot of tequila. It wasn't so bad this time as Peridot was beginning to feel numb and tired. She rolled down the window on the ride to campus, the cool breeze felt good on her face.
Upon arriving, Kevin helped her out of the car and up the stairs to her room. She was beginning to regret the decision to drink so heavily as she was even having trouble walking. She hardly remembered the car ride and fumbled with her key until finally the door opened and she practically tripped into the room. Kevin was beside her instantly, helping her up and steering her toward the bed. "Here, sit down."
She flopped on the bed with a sigh, ready to succumb to sleep, but groaned as she kicked off her shoes and realized she was still wearing her jeans. She made an attempt to get up. "I should get changed."
"Here, I'll help." He was unbuttoning her pants before she could protest. "You have a roommate?"
She figured he must've noticed the extra bed. "Lapish…she's…drama retreat…weekend." She heard the gentle fold of fabric as her jeans hit the floor. Kevin's footsteps retreated and she was more than ready to sleep her intoxication away.
Creak… Door closing.
Click…Lock.
Peridot sighed. Good, Kevin had locked the door on his way out. Except…her mind said, attempting to hold on. It should be click, lock, creak, door close. It was the other way around.
Click…Lock.
Clink…Belt buckle.
Creak…Mattress springs.
And she was out.
